Diary of a Human Target (Book One) - Tainted Youth
Friday, 1st October 1976
Now that I am in the second class of gymnasium, my life seems to be taking an unexpected turn for the better. I can say I have become almost popular, since I talk with many children at school; my best friend is Mary Tsamis, a lively short girl who often bothers the teachers with her mischief. Strangely enough, the two of us are well-matched and we have fun together.
Moreover, I have also been admitted to the school choir! I, who last year wasn't allowed even to sing in class! I can hardly explain this, but I must say there is no music master at school this year. It's the physical education master who has undertaken the choir.
This morning we had history with an extremely strict mistress; she is the terror of the school because she throws out of the class any pupil who dares even whisper a word to a classmate during her lesson. This time she was bombarding us with lots of questions from the book of the previous class. I was the only one who raised her hand and answered them all.
“How do you know all this information about history?” a girl asked me later, during the break.
“I remember stuff from last year,” I replied.
“I don't remember a thing from last year,” she said smiling.
Saturday, 20th November 1976
Yesterday, as I woke up in the middle of the night and opened my eyes, I saw aunt Penelope facing me! She was standing beside my bookcase, with her hands on my schoolbag and she was glaring at me! She was wearing a long white nightgown; in fact she was all white, like an apparition! I sat up in bed and kept observing her in wonder for some seconds. Then I tried to get up and ask her what she was doing in my room at this hour, but she vanished into thin air.
What was that, really? Do ghosts really exist, even ghosts of living persons? I'm sure that I saw this, it was not a dream, for I was not sleeping at the time...
Monday, 22nd November 1976
I feel very confident about my school performance this year, since I have done very well both in written tests and oral examinations. I'm such a good pupil, that some of my classmates smile to me in admiration and call me “a wiz-kid”. However, due to certain coincidences (we were not given marks in most subjects), I got the first trimester report with an average grade of 12.2. I hope to have better results in the second trimester.
As about Jasmine, she is almost five years old and her health hasn't improved at all. “I will die soon if we go on like this, but that's the least; unless we find a reasonable solution to the problem, in the end we shall all perish”, says my mother again and again, completely disappointed.
Eventually, my parents have decided there is no other solution but send Jasmine to a special asylum on the island of Leros. Taking into account that this asylum is the only one in the country that receives so helpless cases of disabled persons, we had to pull some strings in order to hurry things on. Otherwise, we would have to wait for ten years or so, and the consequences for my mother and the rest of us would be unpredictable.
Anyway, this is our last night together. Alice and I are sitting in the living room and we are recording Jasmine's favourite songs in two cassettes; she will take them, as well as an old tape recorder, with her in Leros. She is leaving home next morning...
Saturday, 27th November 1976
Mum has just returned home, together with my godmother who accompanied her in that sad trip to Leros. Things proved to be really nasty there: My mother was shocked and started screaming as soon as she found out the wretched living conditions of the inmates in that asylum. Actually, it actually occurred to her to bring back the infant, but she finally got aware that this was not an option. Therefore, she decided to leave our little sister there but arranged for Jasmine to have her own room, away from the other inmates, most of whom suffer from indescribable physical and mental disabilities. We won't forget her, of course. We intend to visit her as often as possible and make sure that she is properly taken care of.
... Ten days later we shall be informed by phone that Jasmine died of intestinal disorders. Only my mother and father will attend the funeral; Alice and I will stay at home, together with old aunt Diamanta from Piraeus. As we shall be informed after our parents' return, Jasmine was buried with her eyes open. No matter how hard the nurses tried, they didn't manage to close them.
Wednesday, 26th January 1977
As times goes by, my class proves to be the most obstreperous in the school. Our reputation reached even the Ministry of Education, when a smart aleck threw two pieces of chalk at the French mistress. Our religion master, Mr Lazopoulos, gets into big trouble any time he gives us a lesson. All the children make fun of him because he is obsessed with religion and especially with St Nicolas. He always tells us to abstain from parties, popular songs, magazines, books etc because “these things are satanic!” He also says that all boys should become monks or priests and all girls nuns or nurses. At the end of each lesson, he wants us to copy a teaching and an adage from the Holy Bible and then he makes us sing a hymn of his inspiration to St Nicolas. The hubbub from the jarring notes and the rattles heard during that hymn, is difficult to describe. On the other hand, he never hesitates to whack the children really bad when they get on his nerves too much.
This morning Mr Lazopoulos gave us back the tests we had written a week before. Everything is perfect in my paper, there are no corrections, yet he has given me a mere 14 with two question marks. I wonder, what did I forget to write? “The teaching and the adage of the lesson,” he told me when I asked him. But he hadn't asked for those in the test...
Friday, 25th February 1977
Since the beginning of this month, I have marked out a boy in my class: His name is George Franzis, and I am in love with him. He is tall and slender, he has big brown eyes with long eye-lashes, voluminous brown hair and a nice smile. He is very handsome. He usually wears clothes that are all in tints of the same colour: one day he is dressed in green, next day in crimson, then in brown, and so on. He is good-hearted, humorous and friendly to everybody, but I think he is a little selfish too. He is also very clever, the best boy pupil in the class. He has a sister, whose name is Rosita and she is one year older than us. She is an impressive blonde with blue eyes and a strong personality. Sometimes, during the breaks, I watch her as she walks around in the schoolyard together with a friend of hers, and she never stops talking.
Every day I befuddle my mother with George's achievements. This morning we were given our reports for the second trimester and mum came to the school in order to receive mine. I sought to show George to her (being careful so that nobody else got wind of that, of course) as he walked past us, this time dressed in white.
“Isn't he gorgeous?” I asked mum and waited for her affirmation.
Yet, she guffawed and said: “Who, him? But he is just a baby!”
“Isn't he handsome?” I insisted.
“He is fine, but he is only a kid! Almost a baby! What is there about him, to fall in love with?”
I was really bewildered at mum's reaction: George is 13 years old, just like I am, but he is very tall and good-looking. He certainly isn't “a kid”. Anyway, what was mum expecting me to show her? Some thirty-year-old man?
...Fro m now on, any time I speak to mum about George, she will always respond: “Big deal! He is only a child! Next year you will have forgotten all about him!”
Thursday, 12th May 1977
It was a nice day today at school. The literature mistress asked us a question and I was the only one who knew the answer. In the third hour we had a French test and I did very well; I expect to be given an 18. When the bell rang, Franzis approached and asked me about the subjects of the test. He believed he had written perfectly, but I showed him that he had made a mistake. He started swearing at himself. He was funny.
We finished school one hour earlier, because the anthropology mistress was absent. All pupils had already left, except me, Mary, George and Mark. George kept calling me and Mary “traitors”. We were still laughing, when suddenly the two boys had a fight. Mark, who
is rather corpulent, was chasing George all over the classroom, with the wastepaper basket in hand. He finally managed to corner him, George raised his hands in surrender, but Mark made him wear the basket like a hat. We all laughed our heads off.
Saturday, 14th May 1977
Today we didn't have any lessons, because the masters had a meeting. Instead, we found a ball and played “the apples” in class. As soon as I threw the ball once, it landed on a boy's face and he started crying. In the meanwhile, the chemistry mistress was coming and we all fled after we had hidden the ball. As soon as we got out, in the schoolyard, the head master called me and asked me to dump about a dozen of cardboard boxes in a barrel. When my classmates saw me, they shouted: “Presents for Yvonne!”
While I was waiting at the bus stop after school, George was standing a little farther, in the company of his friends. Soon, three girls were seen walking at the opposite side of the road. Each of them was holding an ice cream. George started kidding them: “Hey, you three, I want some candy too!”. The girls didn't pay any attention but he insisted: “Hey, I'm talking to you three! I want some candy!” The girls kept on walking down the street unruffled, while we were laughing. “Hey, you! I mean you three! Haven't you counted yourselves yet?” George went on teasing them.
Sunday, 15th May 1977
This morning we had an unexpected visit from uncle Sebastian, my father's second cousin, whom I had never seen before. He arrived with his wife and his three sons, who are 14, 10 and 4 years old. My sister and I played with them cheerfully for many hours, turning the whole house upside down. We all had a whale of a time.
I think it's the first time in my life that I have played so freely, without worrying that somebody might mock or trick me! I can't explain why, but I could really be myself with these boys. In the afternoon, we went swimming in the beach of Glyfada, and then we ate fish and calamari at a seaside taverna. I felt very sorry when they left, late in the evening.
Monday, 16th May 1977
Today the literature mistress was absent, so we had no lesson for two hours. The children spent their time playing SOS on the blackboard. I showed them how many SOSes there were. Everybody said I am a live wire (good for me). Then I played SOS with Louise Hoidas, at her desk. We should have played on the blackboard, because I beat her by 8-1.
The last lesson of the day was physical education. After we had finished, there were only some boys, Mary and I in the classroom. George wanted to take off his track-suit and asked us girls to leave. Yet, we weren't in a hurry to do so. “I'm taking it off!” George threatened. Finally we left, but when we got downstairs Mary remembered that she had left her jacket in the classroom. I was more than willing to fetch it. Franzis had not taken off his clothes yet. I just took the jacket and got away. “Yvonne is a good girl, she is leaving!” said George with a sweet smile.
Tuesday, 17th May 1977
Early this morning we set off on a school day trip to Costa. Our coach was an old flivver. At some traffic lights the driver applied the brakes too late and we crashed into another car. It was a funny accident. We all got off and pushed the other car forward. In the meantime, the oil reservoir of our coach was broken and the black liquid was spilt on the asphalted road. We waited there for about an hour, until they sent us another coach and another driver. Due to the unexpected delay, we finally went to Loutraki instead of Costa.
All pupils were left loose in a wood. Mary and I joined George's party. I was feeling on top of the world but I was so fluttered that I couldn't utter a word. All at once, Mary started throwing grits at George. He tried to reciprocate but Mary kept hiding behind me, so George hit me instead of her and then he said “sorry, sorry”.
A little later we discovered an old restaurant that served nothing but beer. George drank a whole bottle of beer by himself and then he was complaining that his head was spinning. Later on, we all gathered together and took lots of photographs.
On the way back to school, Franzis came and sat next to me. I don't know why, but during the whole journey we didn't exchange a word. Someone joked that he and I are in love and that we shall get married one day. George grimaced in embarrassment and I pretended I hadn't listened.
In the rear of the coach, there were about ten children smoking. Suddenly, one of the masters went to them but instead of punishing them, he asked for a cigarette. One of the girls had a chest pain, probably because of the too many cigarettes she had smoked.
When we arrived at school, late in the evening, George was one of the first pupils who got into the classroom. As soon as he saw me coming, he raised his hands and cried out: “Hello, Yvonne!”. I greeted him back, with a cheerful smile. Maybe he loves me too...
Friday, 20th May 1977
This is my luckiest day ever: As soon as I entered the classroom I saw that, for some strange reason, the rows of desks in my class are now five instead of four that were till yesterday. I found it a little strange because in all classes, in all schools, there are always four rows of desks, never five. Yet, the most surprising thing is that Franzis happens to be sitting right next to me now! We are very close, separated only by a 30cm-wide aisle! He smiled to me, I smiled back. He asked me about my mark in ancient Greek. He smiled again. He got the same mark too.
I had to change desk for the anthropology test and a classmate asked me if I would help him. When I said yes, he started chasing my hand so as to kiss it. Finally, we didn't have that test because:
a) The mistress was in a bad mood,
b) The boy she asked to fetch the papers came back too late, c) She got so angry, that she dismissed all the boys from the class. Only George asked to stay.
Then the mistress made a speech on how useless men are, until the bell rang and we all got away.
Monday, 23rd May 1977
We had a test in ancient Greek the other day, and this morning we were given our corrected papers back. My George was given an imperial 06. I'll never forget the wry face he made as soon as he saw it. The next lesson was history, and I was the only one who raised her hand and answered the mistress's questions. “You are a secret genius!” George told me smiling.
This evening, my sweet sister got on my nerves because she wanted me to give her exactly half of the photos of artists I have clipped out of magazines. She wanted them here and now, she grumbled and grumbled, until I flew off the handle and gave her a clout. She turned on the waterworks at once, mum ran to see what was wrong and Alice moaned that I hit her: “...and I have a terrible headache now!” -the usual performance. Mum glared at me, she ordered me to give half of my photos to Alice, I refused, and my sister resorted to her strongest argument:
“If you don't beat her up, I will vomit!” and she started the act right away.
As expected, mum got furious: “You, big one, give those photos to the kid!” she groaned, while Alice was whining with crocodile tears: “Aaaaaah, my head!”
Then mum pounced on me, shouting: “What did you do to the poor kid, she's only half your age, you big one, you gawk!”
In order to avoid repetition of the usual incident, just like the previous time when mum pushed me down on the floor and started kicking and beating me, I stood up immediately and ran away from home. I was absent from home for a couple of hours, and when I came back mum didn't dare utter a word. With the above strategy, I managed not to get beaten up almost every day, at the age of fourteen...
Wednesday, 25th May 1977
I was given a 16 in the physics test of Monday, although I had written perfectly and expected a 19-20. Why, indeed? Anyway, during the lesson the mistress called me and five other pupils for an oral examination on the blackboard. That mischief of Jason was standing before me. As soon as his turn came, he suddenly pushed me in front of him and I found myself in his place. The whole class laughed. Yet, the mistress got wind of his little trick, so it didn't wash. I did very well in the oral examination and got an 18. As I was returning to my desk, Franzis smiled to me tenderly. In the fourth hour we had to write
an essay with a free subject. I chose to write about “My best friend”. George wrote about “Mother”. I think his essays are silly.
On my way home by bus, the conductor had run out of 50-cent coins, so all pupils had to pay 4 drachmas for the ticket, instead of the usual 3.50. My George kept joking all the way, making happy everyone in the bus. Yet, when his turn came, he found out that he had only three drachmas in his pocket. “Your trick is too old!” the conductor told him sharply. George flinched as if he were scared. Then he received his ticket with trembling hands, while the other passengers were laughing.
“I'll get off at the next bus stop and go home to get those 50 cents!” Franzis went on.
“Stop playing jokes on me!” said the conductor annoyed.
“Alright, I stop!”
Thursday, 9th June 1977
Today is the first day of the final examinations, starting with Greek literature. We had to write an essay with the subject “A chapel on top of the hill”. We also had to analyze the Olympic Hymn. I had left my book at home accidentally, and the boy sitting in front of me was kind enough to lend me his for a while. So, I could study the hymn and write its main idea on a page for him to copy. Moreover, he kept nagging me to help him with the essay. Another boy tried to cheat in the exam, but he was caught red handed by the invigilator. Someone joked: “Miss, this is not a crib-sheet, this is a love-letter!”. Everybody burst out laughing. Another genius had opened his book down on the floor and kept reading from it. He managed well, without being caught.
Anyway, this is the worst day of my life, since the school year is actually over. Unfortunately, George Franzis is writing in the next classroom. This means that we have been separated, and I don't like this at all. Yet, I like to think that our summer separation will only be temporary...
Friday, 17th June 1977
We had the history exam today. As I was handing out the sheets of paper, someone smiled to me and said: “You are giving me the sheet? I will get a 20!”. This time I almost got disqualified because I let the boy behind me copy from my paper and the invigilator got wind of it. Anyway, I'm pleased with what I have written.
I was just leaving when I noticed about twenty sheets of paper which had fallen on the floor, at the threshold of the next classroom. The examination was over, the room was empty and the master had left without realizing that some papers had slipped off his hands. I started browsing among them anxiously, until I discovered that one of them was George's! I was tempted to run off with it and keep it as a memento, without telling anyone. However, I thought about it again, I saw it wasn't a right thing to do and I called a mistress who was passing by at that moment.
Saturday, 25th June 1977
This morning we had our last examination, on housekeeping. The subjects were a piece of cake. I expect to be given a 19-20. When I finished and got out in the schoolyard, George came near and talked to me -I hope not for the last time ever. He said that he was going to have the geography exam later because he was absent on Wednesday, when the rest of us took that exam.
After school, Mary Tsamis invited me to her house in Voula. It proved to be a nice villa with a tiled roof and a big garden. Her mother was not at home and her father had prepared chicken soup for lunch. Tomorrow, Mary and her parents are leaving for the island of Salamis, where they have a cottage. I will phone them as soon as the results of the exams come out.
Wednesday, 30th June 1977
My father arrived home this morning, after many months on a small merchant ship called “Tiny Luck”. We were astounded to hear that three hours before he left the ship, fire broke out; unless he had been awake, they would have all been burnt to death. He has brought us a TV set, a tape recorder and other things from abroad. Yet, due to the slow customs clearance, the items haven't arrived in time and dad has been swearing all day.
In the afternoon, daddy took me and Gregory to the ship. We explored it from stem to stern and then we stayed in the captain's cabin, where we read books and ate roasted gourd-seeds. We had a nice time until it got dark and we returned home.
Thursday, 1st July 1977
The school results have just come out: I have passed the class with an average grade of 17 -better than last year. Especially the exams marks are very good, almost 18 in average. Mr Christopher, a decent veteran air force officer who lives with his wife right across the street, gave me 200 drachmas as a gift. He was very happy about my success. Anybody who hears about my good marks, hardly believes it. Why, really? The only sad mishap is that my friend Mary didn't manage to move up. One thing is certain: I'm never going to forget this wonderful school year...
Thursday, 7th July 1977
This afternoon my mother took me to an orthopedist in Athens. We wanted to have my back examined, because it doesn't seem to be completely straight recently. The doctor, a fat disagreeable man, told me to get undressed as soon as he saw me. I left only my underwear on, and after a quick examination he diagnosed: “cyphosis, lordosis, and scoliosis of 6 degrees! Also, thorax stenosis! Can't you see what a narrow chest she has?”. As about the prescribed treatment, it is a nasty orthopedic belt that will cover my whole body from shoulders to pelvis! I will have to wear it until I am eighteen, said the doctor. Then he gave us the address of his brother's shop, where such belts are made.
As soon as we got out of the surgery, I burst into crying. “Don't cry like this, my girl, such things happen to lots of people,” said an unknown woman who saw me and was interested. Lots of people? Really? How many people wear such an orthopedic belt? I wondered and kept on weeping all the way to the bus stop.
Saturday, 23rd July 1977
At about noon my mother, my sister and I paid a visit to Mrs Lucy, a young neighbour who lives next door. After a while we started talking about ghosts, and Lucy told us that she knows how to summon spirits! We were very surprised when she fetched a Holy Bible at once. Amongst its pages there was a pencil sticking out and it was tied to the book with a string.
Lucy explained that spiritualism is dangerous because spirits absorb energy from those who summon them, rendering them prone to accidents and misfortunes. Then she told us about her sister-in-law, who had called a spirit the other day and three days later she was killed in a car crash together with her little daughter. “But you are in no danger, because I am the one who will summon the spirit; nor is it anything satanic, since we are using the Holy Bible,” she reassured us and started saying The Lord's Prayer. She kept her index fingers stuck to the pencil, which was fixed vertically in between; both her palms were facing the floor and the book was hanging under her two hands.
As soon as Lucy finished the prayer, she called the spirit of my grandmother, Alice, who died six years ago. It was expected to answer our questions either with a “yes” (turning the Holy Bible to the right) or with a “no” (turning the Holy Bible to the left).
“Grandma Alice, do you love Marietta?” asked Lucy about my mother. “Yes”, answered the spirit.
Then, Lucy asked the same about my sister and me, and the spirit answered gave positive answers again.
“Grandma, do you love me?” … “No”.
“She doesn't love me!” said the neighbour, rather worried.
“Will Yvonne finish the third class of gymnasium with a high grade?” my mum wanted to know.
The spirit answered “yes” very quickly.
“Will Yvonne get higher education?”
The book turned to the right, but very slowly.
“Look, how hard it is for her to say yes,” commented Lucy.
At that moment, I thought of getting an answer to a tantalizing query I've had ever since I was an infant; yet, I didn't wish to express it aloud, but only mentally. After the spiritualist had assured me that this could be done, I concentrated and made the following question:
Grandma, tell me, am I clever?
The book didn't move at all.
I repeated the mental question.
Once again, the book stayed motionless
.
“She didn't like the question”, said the neighbour.
Then, my sister took the Holy Bible in her hands; some more questions were made and the book kept turning right or left, just like before. Therefore, it was not Lucy who was doing that somehow, as I had initially suspected.
“Are you tired, grandma?” asked Lucy then, and she got a positive answer.
“She has to go”, said the spiritualist impatiently.
She took the book in her hands again, she said The Lord's Prayer once more and then she asked the spirit to leave.
“Grandma Alice, have you left?” asked Lucy finally.
The book turned to the left.
“She is still here! But she must leave!” she exclaimed anxious.
Lucy repeated the prayer and when she asked again, the book turned to the right.
“If grandma is gone, how did the book turn?” I wondered.
“That was the last turn, as the spirit was leaving” explained Lucy.
Sunday, 7th August 1977
During the summer, Mary and I have become better friends. She often invites me to her house, where I stay for two or three days; we play board games, volleyball or rackets in the street, we go on long walks to the park, or we watch nice films in the local cinema. Sometimes we meet Kate, a peer neighbour. She is a nice girl, with curly red hair and a suntanned skin. She has known Mary ever since they both went to primary school.
This afternoon I happened to see Mary's school report of the second trimester. It had been left under an ashtray in the living room. I couldn't resist the temptation, so I took it in my hands and when I looked at it, I could hardly believe my eyes: She had excellent marks, over 17, in all subjects! Yet, Mary has always been a mediocre pupil, usually getting a 13-14 on average! Moreover, in the end she didn't manage to move up and she has to repeat the second class! I looked again carefully, trying to make out if her marks had been “corrected” (for example, a 13 can easily become an 18), but no, that was not the case. Then I imagined that her parents had bought a report sheet from somewhere and filled it in with the desired marks, in order to show it off to relatives and friends. And the seal of the school? How had it been stamped? Isn't this a mystery...
Friday, 19th August 1977
I have been in Mary's cottage in Salamis for a week now. We are having a great time together, going on long walks, swimming, or playing board games. Every day we meet Kate, whose cottage happens to be nearby, and we have lots of fun. I have impressed everybody with my overall knowledge, as well as with my ability in doing crosswords. My self-confidence grows day by day, as I feel that the others are fond of me. This is one of the happiest summers in my life, yet I am looking forward to the new school year, so that I can meet my George again...
Chapter 10:Class C Gymnasium