Destiny Be Damned
“I had this idea that you guys always had perfect weather. I know you said you didn’t, but I held onto that idea for fun. It never rained on Peter’s.”
Ren snorted. “It rains all the time on Peter’s. Gordon’s father used to say that rain was rebirth. We were always being reborn. We don’t have demons; we do have nasty, cold days.”
That was disappointing. I stared up at the dark sky. We had a lot of rough waves to get through before we got to the island. Maybe Peter’s was trying to not so subtly suggest I stay away. Neil rubbed his elbow before he leaned back and adjusted again. I touched his arm. “Are you okay?”
“What? Oh, sure. I took a blow during training that bothers me on and off. Turns out Thaddeus and I have a long-standing rivalry since the other dimension. He took a pretty big whack at me with the flat of his sword.”
Ren leaned over to whisper in my ear. “That’s putting it mildly. Thaddeus practically dented his elbow. We had to pull the two of them off each other. Our boy here got such a good whack back that Thaddeus wasn’t walking straight for a week.”
“Sometimes it hurts.” Neil shrugged. “Don’t worry about me.”
Except I did. I always would, and I was so lucky to have people I could actually be fearful for, who would care what happened to me, as well. Emotion clogged my throat. “Neil, I’m so sorry you’re hurt. Thank you for all that you did to get to me.”
I should have been used to being co-joined, to the feeling of suddenly being in his mind, but I wasn’t. Neil stared in the mirror, blood dripping down his cheek from a large gash. He wiped it away, but it didn’t stop the bleeding. He closed his eyes, pressing his head to the glass of the mirror over the sink. Took me a moment, but I realized I was in the bathroom of the guesthouse. He winced and pulled back.
A knock sounded on the door. “You okay?” It was Wayne’s voice on the other side of the door. “That was a hell of a blow.”
“I’m fine. And even if I wasn’t, it doesn’t matter. Anything for Mika. I will let Bryant and Thaddeus and any millions of people beat me time and again until I am good enough that they can’t. I’ve failed Mika again. Every day I didn’t remember, every second I didn’t make it clear to her I didn’t want to leave. I made her doubt what was precarious to begin with. I made her cry. So, yeah, they get to beat me as much as they want until they can’t anymore, and then I’ll finally be worthy.”
There was silence for a second. “Do you need a bandage?”
Neil grinned, wiping at the blood again at his cheek. “I think I might need a stitch.”
I was pushed back into my body just in time to watch Neil’s shoulders sag, his eyes turning white in the co-joining. I touched his cheek. He did have a slight scar where he’d been cut. I hadn’t noticed it before, but then again, I hadn’t spent that much time staring at Neil’s face since I got my sight back. I threw my arms around him
“You don’t have to get beat up to make up for making me cry. That was a very strange time, and so much has happened since then. I probably wouldn’t cry now. And we’d have made up if I hadn’t been kidnapped.”
He pulled me tight against him. “Mika, I’m going to spend forever trying to do better.”
“Neil.” I didn’t know what to say so I kissed him.
Next to us, Ren rose. “Take her down to where they stored the carriage. Open up the windows on that deck. You’ll be safe there when you conk out. I’ll keep things running up here. That also means we don’t have to carry you onto the island if you’re out cold. I don’t want the rumor mill to start that you’re sick or drunk. They’ll love to gossip about us, considering it was so odd we left in the first place.”
Neil sighed. “Ren, that’s all good thinking. I’m going to do that. But I couldn’t care less about my reputation. I never did.”
“I watch your back even when you think you don’t need me to. There are a million reasons not to let the gossips think you’re drunk, Neil, none the least of which is that I don’t want your parents to get any kind of financial hit from it. We’re already going to be doing things quite differently. We’re all in love with Mika. We aren’t going to hide that. As far as I’m concerned, anyone who doesn’t get it can go screw themselves. But we’re going to seem at least as presentable on the surface as we did before we left.”
He turned and left without another word, the wind blowing his black hair around his shoulders.
Neil brought me with him to the place Ren had suggested. When we were a distance away, he spoke. “Ren’s not wrong, but he’s not right either. He didn’t grow up with the support of a family, so he’s very concerned that we never lose ours. The thing is, I can’t lose my parents. It was and is unconditional how they feel about me. If someone stopped buying fish from my father because I was drunk, he’d probably say it was better not to have the business in the first place.”
“Maybe he’ll come to understand what that’s like with us. You guys have always been a family, even if you didn’t call it that. And now with me, you officially are. I’m never going to judge any of you. There’s no way you could lose me. Ever.”
Neil’s smile was huge. “Maybe he will. Let’s aim for that.”
Neil pulled open a few of the windows on the deck, letting in air. The boat rocked beneath me, and I was doing my best not to notice it anymore. Did the ship have to roll quite so much? Were we going through some kind of squall? Neil put his hand on my arm. “The ferry makes this trip all the time. Through worse weather than this. The Captain knows these waters. We're safe.”
“I actually wasn't worried about safety so much as throwing up all over myself.” I really didn't want to puke in front of Neil. There was little I hated more than vomiting.
He kissed my cheek. “I'm sorry. You may prove to be a boat fan eventually. There are just some things you see from the water that you can't see any other way. The view of the world is different from the ocean.”
Neil opened the windows on the carriage we usually kept closed. He closed the door, shutting us both inside of it. The room was dark. What light there was from the outside was dimmed thanks to the bad weather.
“Is it okay if I kiss you?”
I took his cheeks in my hands. “I'm hoping you'll do more than kiss me.”
More sure of myself, this time I shut down my link to the others.
Neil stroked a hand down the front of my neck. I shivered. “Let me take care of Mika. Please. Let me.”
He could have whatever he wanted. “Anything.”
Neil kissed me so gently he stole my breath. I closed my eyes while he made love to my mouth, again and again. His breath was sweet and his mouth warm, commanding. His hand traveled under my shirt, pressing his palm against my stomach. Neil didn't seem to be in a rush, and we had time before he'd have to sleep. I wasn't going to rush him through this. Instead, I let myself give into the need to simply give Neil everything. He would say when; he would say how fast.
He lay me back on the seat. How was I ever going to ride in this carriage and not think about this moment or the one I'd had with Lennon? Had there ever been anyone as lucky as me?
Neil tugged my shirt over my head, exposing my bra-less breasts. I hardly needed one, although I did sometimes wear one to have more protection when fighting demons. I was glad to not have anything else between us now. He breathed in slowly before he dove down, sucking on my nipple. The sensation sent electricity through my body. I cried out, my hands digging into the seat.
He bit down on it, and my hips bucked against him. He was hard right where I wanted him to be. “I knew you'd be responsive, Mika. I knew you'd be beautiful, too. I had no idea you'd be so much so in both ways. So much more than I expect every time.” He bit down on the other nipple, and I grabbed onto his chest, gripping his shirt. Neil kissed down my chest to my stomach.
I sucked in a breath, watching him. He stopped moving and sat up, tugging his shirt over his head. “I want to feel you skin-to-skin.”
I didn't need an explanation
. Neil was lean but muscular. His arms and abdominal muscles were well defined. Scars were visible, some of them looking red like they were newer, and some faded. Had he gotten them all training?
He shook his head. “No. You get scarred up on fishing boats. Stop worrying about me. I've never been better than I am right now.”
I could feel his joy. He wasn't lying. There was nothing but love and happiness inside of him. No worries at all. I let myself bask in the glow of those sensations. He grinned at me then yanked my pants off. Unlike my bra, I wore panties.
He lifted his gaze again. “Pink?”
“I like pink. It's not as though I have a lot of choices. I bought what they had in my size in the nearby town. That being said, I kind of like the pink.”
“Everything is sexy on you. You could wear a burlap sack, and it would be the best thing I ever saw.” I wanted to laugh, but the intensity in his gaze told me he wasn't kidding.
Neil thumbed my panties down my legs and threw them aside. His excitement was evident through his pants. I reached forward, breaking my own rule about letting him lead, and palmed him through the material. He sucked in his breath. “Do that again.”
I followed his directions, squeezing him harder, and he moaned. “Like that?”
“I want your hands on me. Here's a thought.” He pulled off his pants, followed by his briefs. He was long and thick. “Let me make love to you, Mika.”
I grinned. He was so strong and yet so vulnerable at the same time. “Do you think at this point that you need my permission?”
“I want to make sure. It's important to me that you want me as much as I do you. I need to know.”
I put my hand over his heart and brought his hand to cover my own. “As much as you love me, I love you that much, too. This is real. Feel me in your mind. Know me in your soul.”
I expected him to move where he could put himself inside of me, but instead, he scooted down. Without a word, he stroked my clit with his tongue. I gasped. This was different. It wasn't the same as his fingers would feel and quite a change from what it would feel like when his cock was deep inside of me. This was its own kind of pleasure, and I wanted more. He moaned, which only intensified the feelings. He wasn't doing this out of obligation. It made him even more turned on to do this.
Over and over, he claimed me with his mouth. This was ownership, and by divinity, I wanted to be owned by Neil. When the pleasure exploded out of me, I had no warning, no chance to stop the need and all I did was ride the wave. I called out his name, and after a second, he stopped his ministrations. Neil lifted his eyes to meet my gaze, and I was on him. I pushed him back. There was letting him lead and there was denying myself what I wanted, and what I was sure he did, too. His mouth had been on me, I wanted mine on him, too. He'd lengthened, and I wasn't at all certain I was going to be able to do this. Practice was different than theory.
Still, I fit my mouth around him and pressed down.
“Fuck.” Neil went very still, strain in both his voice and the muscles in his legs. I bobbed my head. Once. Twice. Three times. His hand massaged the back of my head. “Stop. Okay. I need to be in you and this is sweet torture. Too good. Too much for this time. Next time, I'll beg for it, okay? I'm the biggest kind of fool to even be saying no to this now. But I need to be in you.”
I stopped my movements and pulled back. “Well, if you're sure.”
He flared his nostrils. “I'm sure of nothing except how much I love you.”
I lay back down, spreading my legs, anticipation making me even hotter than I already was, which I wouldn't have thought possible up until that point. Neil was slow to enter me. My body stretched to accommodate him as I kept my eyes on his face. His eyes adored me. “Keep your eyes on me, love. Through this whole thing. Keep your eyes on me. I need to see your emotions, I need to know that you're mine.”
I'd give him whatever he wanted, always. He moved in and out of me, slow and then fast. Every thrust was a pleasure, every withdrawal a loss. I couldn't get enough. I needed more. Had to have it. Neil. Oh by divinity, I loved this man.
My pleasure took a long time to come but then so did his. We weren't hurried and my orgasm was slow, more like a sigh of a completion. He emptied himself inside of me, his hand on my forehead. Our eyes stayed on each other until the last moments when I had to close my lids. It was too much. Pleasure could be all consuming, and with Neil, it was.
After a while, Neil spoke. “Mika.” He called me back to myself, his smile one of pure male satisfaction. I touched it with my fingertips, and he bit down.
We rearranged ourselves. The carriage was warm and dark. The rocking of the boat didn't bother me. We were almost cocooned by the carriage. I loved this.
I lay on his chest, listening to his heartbeat.
He spoke, his voice lowered like he was close to sleep. “What happens now? While I conk out?”
“I don't know. Somehow you change, cellularly, from our co-joining. It knocks you out for a while. It’s a very still sleep. You don't move, don't snore.”
He laughed. “I don't snore, I don't think. Not like Wayne.”
“Well, in any case you won't. You'll be very silent. And then you'll wake up. It’s a deep sleep. We won't be able to wake you.”
Neil's hand was in my hair, rubbing my scalp. “I hate that.”
“We'll be okay. Try not to worry. I know that's hard for you.”
“Hmm. I think it's just the job of One to worry. That's why they give us this role.”
I nestled down on him. Maybe I would also get a nap. “So you’re One. That’s what I would have thought.”
“I guess we never did talk about it. Yes, I’m One. Wayne is Two. Gordon Three, he speaks to the birds. It’s always Three or Four that does. Ren is Four, and Lennon Five.”
I snuggled. “Everyone good with their numbers?”
He didn’t answer me. I lifted my head. His eyes were closed. His chest moved as he breathed, but otherwise he was silent. I was glad he was getting rest. I’d watch for now. Neil didn’t sleep very well regularly. He had too much on his mind. His job was to worry, but so was mine.
I couldn’t sleep and eventually left the storage deck to find the others, nearly colliding with Ren when I did. He waited in the hallway, reading one of the demon books we’d brought. He jumped up when I came out.
“Hiya.” He smiled at me. “Our boy knocked out?”
I walked into his hug. “Yes.”
“Sorry if I was off before. I…”
I kissed his cheek. “You weren’t.”
“Oh.” He seemed startled by my response. “Okay, then. Come with me. The rain stopped. We’ll sit and wait in the fresh air.”
That seemed like a plan.
I didn’t know what I expected, but the noise on the island surprised me. For some reason, I had pictured it as being sort of quiet. But the dock was bustling. Boats came and went and people shouted out their wares. Gordon had his arm around me. I was going home with him, Ren staying with us as he lived with Gordon’s father, too. Wayne took the carriage to let his father know we were back in town. He’d keep Neil with him and take him to see his own parents after Neil woke up. Lennon was going to see his parents but said it was better if he just handled them alone. The girls came with me. Gordon thought his father would like having company around the house. He’d always taken people in when they needed it.
I would meet their families soon. The plan was for the guys to arrive back at Gordon’s home later that night. I’d told them they could stay with their families, but they’d declined. None of them wanted to be split up and that made me enormously happy.
Relieved, even.
This was new. I hadn’t anticipated my anxiety. People stared as we walked by, and Gordon kissed my cheek. “Hello, Mrs. Lampton,” he called out to one of the particularly rude stare givers. “This is my girl, Mika. You see our eyes? That’s because she’s a Sister. She belongs to all five of us. Or we all belong to her. Good to see you. It’s been wa
y too long.”
I stared at him, my mouth open. “Well, I suppose that is one way to handle it.”
Walking next to the girls, Ren laughed. “Gordon doesn’t do subtle.”
It was half an hour of an uphill climb from the docks to Gordon’s father’s home. The house was bigger than I’d pictured. White with a blue fence surrounding it, the décor matched that of the rest of the street. Unlike the rest of the world, well the bit of it I had seen, this place was well kept. People had flowers in their lawn and swings on their porches.
Gordon went inside first, and although Ren tried to get me to walk in front of him up the stairs, I resisted. I wanted him to go in front, and after a second he seemed to understand. “He’s going to love you. There’s no one more open on the planet than Gordon’s father. Javier will welcome you with open arms.”
The girls had no such hesitation and bounded up the stairs after Gordon, sure of their welcome. I just wasn’t as confident. I was the woman who was going to make Gordon’s life much harder than anyone could have imagined. Granted, at some point he’d chosen this. But his life expectancy had seriously shortened thanks to loving me.
I’d do my best to answer any questions and…
The door swung open, and an older version of Gordon bounded down the stairs. He paused only long enough to embrace Ren before he headed straight to me. I stiffened my back. Demons I could manage, but irate fathers were not something I knew how to handle.
I braced myself. Was he going to strike me? I tried to look for Ren. Surely he wouldn’t… Then Javier hugged me. I was stiff for several moments. Hugging by anyone other than my five was a strange occurrence. But eventually, I wrapped my arms around this man and stood there, letting it happen.
When he was done, he took a step back. “So glad you’re here. A Sister. I wouldn’t have imagined it. Those white eyes you and Gordon both have already. This is such an honor. We know your Sisterhood is real because they took a child so many years ago, but you’re really the stuff of legends. Gordon says this is all fated? And that you’re with all my boys. Come in.”