Reality Check

  “I… I don't know,” I admit. “I didn't know this was a show requirement.” Zac and I weren't hanging out in that way when I signed on to the show so I never thought about what it would mean to make my private life very public.

  “What happens if Zac says no? What if I don't want to ask him?” I hold my breath.

  Addison brushes her hair behind her ear, looking a tad uncomfortable. “Well, you did sign up to show your life on camera and if your life includes Zac and you refuse to let him appear…”

  “I'm not refusing. I just know what he thinks, and I don't think he will do it,” I butt in.

  “If you refuse to let him appear,” Addison repeats, “we'll have to hold you in breach of contract.”

  Breach of contract? What does that mean? It's obviously bad, from the looks of Addison's face. “I've only gone on one date!” I say a tad loudly. I look anxiously back at the girls, who are staring at us. “Sorry,” I say to Addison. “It's just I spoke to Zac about this and he made it pretty clear that he wasn't interested in being part of the show. I can't force him to do something he doesn't want to do.”

  “I know,” Addison says quietly, not offering me another alternative.

  “I don't know what to do,” I say helplessly. “Should I call Susan about this? Maybe she'd reconsider.”

  Addison shakes her head. “Susan has left the decisions up to me, Charlie,” she says, and I wince. “And I'm telling you, if you're dating Zac, we need to see him. I'm sorry.”

  I inhale sharply. Addison doesn't look sorry about Zac. You don't throw around the term “breach of contract” if you're sorry. Whatever that means.

  “Brooke had a fun idea—a group date.” Addison tries to sound upbeat. “She thought it would be cute. She and Hallie are setting Keiran up on a blind date and tagging along with dates of their own. It would be great if Zac and you went along too. We told Brooke it would be better if you were there since you're our focal point.”

  Since when is Brooke setting up scenes? This is also the first I've heard of Keiran's blind date and I have to hear about it from Addison?

  “Could you try talking to Zac again?” Addison begs, sounding friendlier than she did a moment ago. “I don't want to tell you what to do. We just want a good show.” I shrug and Addison smiles. “Okay then, next topic.” She heads back to the group and I walk slowly behind her. “I wanted to tell you guys some great news,” she says, avoiding my gaze. “Another thing we were talking about at our weekly meeting was your spring fling. We want to tape it.”

  “I thought you didn't have permission to tape on school property,” Hallie says as she fiddles with her yellow belt. She's wearing jean capris and a green tank with sequins around the neckline.

  “We don't,” Addison tells us, “but that doesn't mean you can't throw an after-party.”

  “The spring fling doesn't usually have an after-party,” I tell her.

  “What do you guys think? You could be in charge of the invite list and the décor. We'll do it the way you guys would—we want this to feel real. That's why I was thinking the location could be the Crab Shack. Make it sort of spring fling weekend.”

  “Really?” Hallie says excitedly. “My parents would love that.”

  “The atmosphere is perfect with the water and the boats and we could bring in a DJ—maybe someone you guys know—and food, decorations,” Addison says. “Nothing over the top. Susan wants it to be as normal as possible. What do you think?”

  “I think it sounds ten times better than the lame dance we're going to have in the high school gym,” Brooke tells her, and chomps her berry gum loudly. Her tongue is going to be as pink as her shirt if she's not careful.

  Addison looks at me. I know I'm being quiet. “Charlie? It's your decision. This is your show.”

  I feel Brooke's eyes bore into the back of my head. “An after-party could be fun,” I agree even though I'm still unnerved by our earlier conversation.

  “Great,” Addison says and begins dialing her cell phone. “I'll let production know they can start readying plans. Do you think all of your dates will be up for two dances?” She speaks into her phone. “Hello? Hi. It's me. Yes, Charlie loves the idea,” I hear Addison say as she walks out of earshot.

  “We all love the idea,” I hear Brooke mumble, but I don't look up. My head is spinning as it is.

  “Are you okay?” Hallie asks me.

  “Yeah,” I lie. “I'm fine.” I can't talk about this. What am I going to do about Zac? What about Keiran? “Addison said something and I'm still trying to wrap my head around what it means.”

  “Well, figure it out fast.” Brooke sounds snippy. “No one makes a move without the star of the Charlie show.”

  “What's with you?” I grumble.

  “Nothing,” Brooke says. “I wouldn't dare cross our star.”

  “I didn't ask for this,” I remind her. I feel hot all of a sudden, even in my purple tank and white cargo shorts. “I've got enough on my mind already. I'd be fine if this was everyone's decision.”

  “Then tell Addison that,” Brooke demands. “Tell her the rest of us aren't leftovers.”

  “You don't even care what Addison just told me.” I'm shaking. “All you care about is your face time on camera.”

  “Charlie,” Hallie warns. “Brooke, stop.”

  “Of course I care about face time,” Brooke says, not denying it. “You're lying if you say you don't.”

  Kayla comes running down the alley and interrupts the argument. “Addison! Addison!” She turns around and rushes back over. “We just played back the tape and there was no sound,” Kayla tells her. “We need to redo the scene by the fudge booth.”

  “What?” Addison groans. “You're kidding me! How did that happen?”

  Kayla shrugs. “Better we know now instead of later. We'll have to redo it.”

  Addison nods. “That's fine. I forgot that we need to have the girls recap their week at school since we haven't seen them there.” Addison is jotting down notes.

  Kayla scratches her head. “Okay, Hank will get right on it. We're setting up the shot at the stand now and team two is getting the Crab Shack booth ready. Hopefully we can get this all done in an hour. Keiran is done taping her lunch scene with the kids.”

  “I don't even remember what I said at the fudge shack.” Hallie is freaked out. “How am I supposed to redo the scene?”

  “Bigger problem—the majority of that scene had to do with me and Keiran fighting,” I remind everyone. “She's not going to want to redo that, let alone have me bash her parents again. I don't think I can fake this.”

  Even Addison looks perplexed. “I liked what we had earlier and don't want to lose it. I'll run ahead and look at the playback. Meet me over there. I wonder if we can just dub over.” She looks at us and smiles. “I'm sorry, girls. This happens sometimes and I know it stinks. No one likes redoing real life.” She looks at me when she says that.

  “Keiran is going to be so mad,” I tell the others.

  “She'll live,” Brooke declares. “This is part of the process. We just have to suck it up. That's what actors do.”

  “But we're not actors,” Hallie reminds her, sounding frustrated herself. “We're replaying our own lives.”

  Brooke shrugs. “You heard Addison. It happens. What can we do?”

  “I feel like I'll be lying.” I fidget slightly. “If I could redo my fight with Keiran I'd do it differently. And besides, the whole fight was so stupid to begin with.”

  “It's always poor Charlie,” Brooke snips.

  “What's wrong with you?” Hallie hits Brooke's arm. “Stop being so jealous of Charlie! Of Marleyna Garrison! Of the world!”

  “I am not jealous!” Brooke yells at her. “Why don't you stop being such a flirt?”

  “A flirt?” Hallie bellows. “What's that got to do with—”

  Addison runs over. “We have to try to redo the scene now.” I groan. “I radioed to Keiran and she's on her way back over.”

&nbs
p; “Was she okay?” Hallie asks.

  “Totally fine,” Addison says, but she seems distracted. “Let's go.”

  We walk across the street and over to the fudge stand, barely speaking to one another. Security is holding the gawkers back, but there are still shoppers. Joseph, Hannah, and Stevie are sitting happily in their wagon, sucking on ice pops.

  “I really appreciate you guys doing this,” Addison tells us. “I promise we'll try to keep this from happening again.”

  None of us will look at each other. I look at Keiran. “Kiki?” I ask. “I'm sorry about before. I didn't mean to upset you.”

  “Forget it,” she says, but stares at the fudge. “I thought if anyone would understand it would be you, but I guess I was wrong.”

  “You're not wrong,” I tell her. “I feel bad, that's all. I don't want you to spend every waking moment taking orders.”

  “Are we ready?” Addison asks. “Okay, let's try this again. Action!”

  “You need a muzzle for those three.” Brooke doesn't flinch. She stares bitterly at Joseph, Hannah, and Stevie, who for once aren't making a peep.

  Keiran explodes, louder than she was the first time. Her voice is shaking and I can tell she's still really mad. “You know what, Brooke? I'm sick of you guys harping on me because of how I help out at home! At least I pitch in. Unlike you on the farm.” The color drains from Brooke's face and her mouth clamps shut.

  Uh-oh. Uh-oh. This isn't good. I try to intervene. “Kiki, we're just trying to be honest.”

  Keiran turns toward me. It's unsettling how mad she is. I've never seen her like this. “Honest? Let's talk honesty, Charlie. Where were you Friday night? Why haven't you talked about that today? How was your date with Zac?”

  That's low. This isn't the way I want to introduce Zac.

  “Keiran,” Hallie says quietly. “Stop.”

  “What? If we can bash Keiran's family, we should be able to talk about Charlie's precious date,” Brooke agrees, a sick smile on her face.

  “She's right,” Keiran agrees, surprising me with her nasty tone. “If you can all start with me about babysitting, why can't we talk about Brooke's family farm, or you being a major flirt, Hallie, or the fact that Charlie hasn't mentioned her crush on Zac.”

  “Shut up, Keiran,” I hiss. “You too, Brooke. You're both acting like Hannah and Stevie.”

  “I'm acting like Hannah and Stevie?” Keiran points to herself. “I'm not the one hiding things. Who died and left you boss?”

  “Chill out, Keiran, you're acting like a brat,” Hallie says stonily. “Chill out! We're allowed to boycott the Little Einsteins. You bring them everywhere!”

  “Tell us more about Zac,” Keiran presses, ignoring her

  and looking at me. “Why won't you tell us about your date? Didn't you have fun?”

  “Cut it out, Keiran,” I warn.

  “Why should she?” Brooke asks. “What, Charlie? You don't like being the center of attention?” She laughs. “I find that hard to believe.”

  “I'm out of here,” Keiran says, and I see a stray tear fall down her cheek. “I'm not going to listen to this stuff anymore. Enjoy the fair.”

  “Keiran, wait,” I beg. “Don't leave like this.” But she ignores me.

  “I'm out of here too,” says Hallie in a huff.

  “Cut!” Addison yells. “Wow, I think that may have even been better than your first round.”

  “I couldn't agree more,” Brooke tells her, and I want to hither. I'm not really sure that was a compliment. I can't even look at Addison or Brooke.

  “Cheer up, guys,” Addison tells us. “She won't be mad for long, I promise. Sometimes filming gets to people. If I know you four, you'll make up by nightfall. Phil,” she calls. “Get Hallie back here for the Crab Shack segment.”

  The last thing I want to do right now is tape anything else. This was fun this morning, but at the moment, I don't want to go anywhere but home to bed. Too bad that's not an option. I walk away to compose myself and sit down on a storefront bench just as my phone rings. It's Zac and his timing couldn't be more perfect. I need a pick-me-up. “Hey,” I say, trying to sound casual instead of out of breath.

  “Don't think. Just answer.” Zac's voice comes over the line and I instantly lose my composure. “What are you doing at this exact moment?”

  I don't hesitate. “Talking to you.”

  “Funny.” Zac laughs. “Where?”

  “I'm taping,” I admit. I could ask him to stop by right now. Addison would want me to, but…

  “Bummer,” Zac says. “I was hoping you were at Milk and Sugar and I could pick you up for dinner.”

  Really? “I'll be back by six,” I hear myself say hopefully.

  “I think I could hold out till then,” Zac says. I hear a dog bark in the background and I know it's his Chihuahua, Two-Face. He named him after a character from Batman, which he's all geeked out over. When he talks about movies, he sounds so cute.

  I look over at Addison, feeling my annoyance come back. “You might not want to eat with me when I tell you about this dance after-party my show is throwing.”

  I fill Zac in, leaving out the breach-of-contract term Addison threw around to threaten me. “I really want you to be there—and not just to get you on camera, because I know how you feel about that. I think it could be a lot of fun and I really want to share it with you.” Was that saying too much? Sometimes I can't shut up when I'm nervous.

  Zac doesn't say anything at first. “I guess it wouldn't kill me,” Zac says finally. “My grandparents would love it. They live three thousand miles away and are always complaining they never see me. If this makes it on air they'll be the most popular couple at their senior center.”

  I laugh. “I promise to make sure Phil gets your best side.”

  Zac laughs lightly. “My best side is the one you'll be standing on.”

  I blush. Did he really just say that? What am I supposed to say back?

  “So, six?” Zac fills the empty space.

  “Six,” I agree, and hang up feeling happy again. I want to tell the world what just happened. I want to rush over to my friends to repeat the conversation word for glorious word. But then I remember: We're barely speaking.

  eight

  Breakups and Makeups

  “Is this sand taken?”

  I shield my face with my hand and look up into the late afternoon sun. Keiran is standing in front of Brooke, Hallie, and me, holding her beach bag and a polka dot beach towel. She looks kind of miserable.

  “That depends,” I tell her. “You're not going to throw sand at us, are you?”

  She smiles. “Nah. My toddler outburst is over, I swear.”

  “Then park it,” Brooke instructs her.

  Keiran places her towel on the cool sand next to us. It's the middle of the week and we're having an unusual 70-degree April day. I figured it was about time we all stopped bickering and made up, so I extended a peace offering: a group tanning session at the beach. With the spring fling a week away, and today being one of the only days we all have off from taping, I thought it was the perfect opportunity to talk and get some color (I'm as pale as the sandy shore along the Long Island Sound). Hallie and Brooke showed up first, but when Keiran didn't come, I thought we were doomed.

  “We didn't think you were coming,” Hallie tells her.

  “I had a makeup test for Spanish,” Keiran says as she sits down. “I told Ms. A that I had to finish fast so I could get to my friends and do some groveling.”

  “Grovel away,” Brooke says, not looking over. She's got her eyes closed and her face heavenward. She's pulled her hair up into a bun and her crewneck shirt and bra straps off her shoulders. The rest of us have done the same. Tan lines are an absolute faux pas in a beach town like ours.

  “I overreacted at the street fair,” Keiran says with a sigh. “I freaked when you guys mentioned my mom. The cameras were on me and I kept thinking about how my mom was going to see it. I guess I wanted the rest of you
to see how that felt. That's why I started bringing up all that other baggage.” She looks away guiltily.

  “It's okay,” I tell her, feeling bad myself. “We shouldn't have ganged up on you like that. We all said things we probably should't have.” I look at Brooke, who doesn't say anything. She sort of apologized for the “Charlie Show” comments, but I still get the feeling she hates that the show is centered around me. As if I had anything to do with it.

  “I'm sorry too,” says Hallie. “We all are.”

  “But you should have known better, Kiki,” Brooke interjects. “You're supposed to be honest. Not worry about what your mom thinks.”

  “Why, because you could care less what your parents think, Brooke?” Keiran says, surprising me with her continuing

  fiestiness. “I'm not like the girls on My Super Sweet 16 you seem to want so badly to be. My parents care about how I come across, and I care about how they come across on TV. I'm not going to make my family look bad just to get a good line.”

  “Keiran is right,” I agree, when Brooke is too stunned to speak. I roll over on my towel and lean on my elbows. “Our families and friendship should come first.” Keiran grins. “And I would have agreed with you sooner about this, but you've been ignoring my calls.”

  “And snubbing us in the hallways,” Hallie adds.

  “I know.” Keiran sighs again. “I have to be more mature about this stuff. Now that we're taping a reality show, I guess every part of my life is fair game.”

  “Especially Charlie, since she's the star,” Brooke quips, and sits up to get some sunscreen.

  I give her a look. “Can we clear the air about this?”

  “Please do!” Hallie glares at Brooke.

  “We all knew this was how the show was going to work from the beginning,” I remind Brooke. “I don't know why Susan picked me, but she did. What I do know is that I could never do this without you guys.”

  Brooke shrugs. “True. I'm just saying it wouldn't hurt for Addison to realize there is more star potential lurking in her cast than just her favorite player. I, quite frankly, have a lot of cool things going for me that you guys don't.”