Tainted Heartbreak (Tainted Knights Book 3)

  “But why would you give me a job?” I cried, completely overwhelmed and no longer able to hold on to my emotions.

  Her face softened, and I was suddenly jealous of her children, because I knew this was the expression on her face every time she looked at them. The understanding in her eyes, the gentle smile that told me to trust her and she would take care of any evil that could possibly ever touch their world. Her son and daughter were so lucky to have a mom like Emmie. It was something I had given up ever seeing on my own mother’s face long before she had even met Malcolm. “Because I like you. Which isn’t something that happens all that often. Look, I’m a total bitch. I wouldn’t spit on someone if their face was on fire if I didn’t like them. Those who I like, they become family to me, and family is the most important thing in my life. I have job openings, and you need a job. Let’s help each other out.”

  “But—”

  “The road manager position pays more because you have to deal with so much crazy shit, but they all come with pretty good benefits,” she said, cutting me off. “Health, dental. Paid vacations. But the drawback is that I’ll be your boss, and I run a really tight ship. Basically, I’m a tyrant to work for, and everyone in this building will tell you to run for the hills while you still can.”

  Tears started leaking from my eyes. “I don’t know what to say.”

  “I totally get it if you want to take a few days.” She grabbed a stack of papers from the corner of the desk. “These are the jobs that I have open. Take a little time and look them over, decide which one you think you would be the most comfortable doing, and come back on Friday. We can discuss everything then.”

  In a daze, I left her office. When I got outside, I was still unable to find my voice to even hail a cab. Scanning the papers Emmie had given me, I read over each job opening, what they entailed, and how much money each position offered. But it still didn’t make sense to me. She wanted to help me. She understood what I went through with Malcolm.

  She had been a victim of abuse too.

  Maybe that was what I was having the most difficulty understanding. Emmie Armstrong was so strong. It was why she had been my celebrity hero for so long. It was why I always wanted to be just like her. To be told that she had been physically hurt by a parent made her more human.

  My phone rang, jerking me into alertness. Pulling it from my pocket, I saw it was Lindsey. “Can I borrow that dress with the killer back to it?” she asked by way of a greeting, and I could hear the excitement in her voice. “Harden is taking me to dinner later, and I totally need something sexy to wear.”

  “Yes, of course you can. Do you want to wear those heels Riley gave me for Christmas?” I sounded completely normal, which kind of freaked me out with how twisted my head was right then.

  “You don’t mind?”

  “Of course not. Take them. Have fun.” I stopped on the corner with a group of other people waiting for the light to change so we could cross the street. “When can we meet this guy? I’m really starting to wonder if he’s a real person or not,” I teased.

  “He’s just really private. But I was thinking soon. I really like this guy, Mar. And the best part? My parents will love him. Dad is coming into town in a few weeks, and I’m actually thinking of introducing them.”

  My eyes nearly popped out of my head for the second time that day. “Holy shit, Lin. That is major. You never introduce your boyfriends to your parents.”

  “He’s not technically my boyfriend. Not yet anyway. But he asked me to go away this weekend, and I told him yes. So…yeah. Crap, I need a wax in the worst way!” She groaned, then laughed. “Afterward, I’ll introduce you and Riley to him. Okay?”

  “Sounds like we need a spa day. We can totally do that tomorrow if you want. I need some girl time with you and Riley.”

  She let out an exasperated breath. “I know. We’ve missed you. Or, at least, I have. If I’m not out with Harden, you’re out with Cash. And we haven’t seen each other for longer than five minutes the last few weeks. I’m totally jealous of your boyfriend right now.”

  “Then it’s a date. Tomorrow.”

  “I’ll make the arrangements,” she promised. “Thanks again for the dress and shoes. See you later!”

  Laughing at the whirlwind she had just made of my head all over again, I kept walking. With my friend’s distraction, I had been able to wrap my head a little more around the realization that I had a job waiting for me with the coolest chick I had ever met. All I had to do was decide which one I wanted.

  I stopped at the coffee shop near my apartment and grabbed a frappe. Sucking down the sugary, caffeinated drink of the gods, I took a seat at the back of the shop and read over the details and expectations of each job Emmie had presented me with for the third time.

  Right away, I knew there was no way I would ever even consider the PR position. I hated being in front of cameras, and I normally spat out expletives whenever a member of the press so much as said my name. The accounting position was pretty straightforward. With all the math classes I’d sailed through over the years, I knew it was something I could easily see myself doing.

  And being totally bored with.

  But it was safe. And the starting yearly salary alone would give me a comfortable life.

  The list of things a road manager was expected to do, however, was two pages long. Some of them had my eyes widening, and I even snorted a time or three picturing myself doing some of them. Basically, it sounded like I would be babysitting the “clients” while they were on tour. Just thinking about the list alone was exhausting.

  Shaking my head, I lifted my phone and was about to call Cash to ask his opinion on all of this when my screen lit up with an incoming call. My heart fell to the floor in dread when I saw who it was.

  Jane.

  She never called me first. Whenever I talked to her, it was on my usual call to Dad or one of my brothers. In my gut, I knew something was wrong, and my fingers shook when I answered the call.

  “Amara?” Her voice was filled with tears, and I knew it was worse than I could have imagined.

  “What’s wrong?” I whispered, unable to find my voice.

  “Honey…i-it’s your dad.”

  Chapter 10

  Cash

  I was just stepping out of the shower when my phone rang with the tone I’d assigned to Amara. Grinning, I wrapped the towel around my waist and grabbed my phone.

  “How did the meeting go with the fire-breather?” I asked with a laugh.

  “Cash…” she sobbed, and it felt like the bottom fell out of my world.

  “Baby, what’s wrong? Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Fuck, what had Emmie said to her? I was already getting pissed at my manager when Amara started talking.

  “M-My… My dad was in an accident at work,” she choked out. “They…” She sobbed again, and I jumped into action. I jerked the towel off and did a rough dry. I was already half dressed when she was able to speak again. “There was an explosion. He… His men… Oh God, Cash. He didn’t make it.”

  “Where are you? Home?” I grabbed my shirt and keys and jogged out of my apartment toward the elevators. “Amara, where are you?” I repeated when she didn’t say anything. Her broken sobs were killing me, and all I could think about was how fast I could get to her.

  “I’m at the coffee p-place by my apartment. I was here when Jane called. I just got off the ph-phone with her.”

  “Baby, I’m on my way. I’ll be there in five minutes.” I jumped into my car and pulled my shirt over my head before starting it. “Stay on the phone with me. Talk to me.”

  “I don’t know what to do,” she whispered. “They haven’t even found his body yet.”

  “It’s going to be okay. Don’t worry about anything. I’ll take care of whatever needs handling.”

  “Oh fuck. I need to go home and pack a bag. I need to find the first flight out to Tulsa.”

  “Baby, stay where you are. I’m almost there. We’ll get there as soon as I c
an get it arranged. I swear to you, it’s going to be okay.” I was driving one-handed, weaving through traffic and getting the finger from pissed-off drivers.

  “He can’t be dead,” she sobbed. “Oh God, he’s all I have left.”

  “Baby.”

  I heard someone speaking in the background, asking if Amara was all right. She only sobbed harder, and I pressed my foot down on the gas. Seeing the coffee shop, I did a quick U-turn in the middle of traffic and double-parked right in front of the place. I jumped out, deaf to the sound of angry horns honking. Rushing inside, I found a small group of people gathered around Amara’s table in the back of the shop.

  Someone was offering her a napkin, but she didn’t even seem to realize there were concerned people trying to take care of her. I pushed through the crowd of people until I was crouching down in front of her.

  I took the phone from her chilled fingers, and she seemed to snap out of her daze.

  “Is she going to be okay?” someone asked.

  “Yes,” I growled. “She’s my girlfriend. I’ll take care of her. She’s just gotten some bad news.”

  “Cash?” Amara whispered, tears pouring down her beautiful face. “My dad is gone.”

  “I’m so sorry, Dreamer.” I lifted her into my arms. Someone grabbed the papers that I hadn’t noticed on the table along with her phone and put them on her lap, and I nodded my thanks before carrying her out to my car.

  Traffic was backed up and people were cursing me as they slowly drove around my parked car, but my focus was completely on Amara. I put her in the front passenger seat and buckled her in. She looked so lost and helpless. I brushed a quick kiss over her brow before going around and getting in behind the wheel.

  Turning the car in the direction of LAX, I hit Riley’s name on my contact list. It rang a handful of times before she answered. “What’s up, douchebag?” she laughed.

  “I’m on my way to the airport with Amara now. I don’t know when we’ll be back. I just wanted to let you know where she’s going to be.”

  There was a short pause on her end. “Why?”

  “Something happened. Amara’s dad was in an accident at work. It’s…bad.”

  Riley gasped. “Oh God. Is she okay? Where is she? Let me talk to her!”

  I switched the phone to speaker. “She’s beside me. Go ahead.”

  “Mar?” Riley was already crying. “What can I do, babe?”

  “Riles,” she sobbed. “My dad…”

  “Oh, sweetie. I’m so sorry.”

  “We’re on our way to LAX now, Riley,” I informed her. “If I can’t get us out on a flight soon, I’ll charter something for us. I just wanted to let you know so you didn’t worry about her.”

  “Fuck, Cash. Take care of my bestie. I’ll call Lin and see about getting us a flight tonight. We’ll meet you at her dad’s house.”

  “Riles, you can’t! You have that big presentation with your mom tomorrow.” Amara tried to reason through her tears. “This is important for you.”

  “You are more important than anything!” Riley cried. “I’ll see you as soon as I can, Mar. I’ll bring you some clothes. Okay?”

  “But Riles, Lin—”

  “Take care of her, Cash!” Riley commanded and hung up.

  Tossing the phone into the cupholder, I grabbed Amara’s hand and kissed the back of it. “It’s going to be okay, baby. I’ve got you.”

  Less than a minute later, my phone started blowing up with incoming texts. I didn’t look to see who it was. By the ringtone, I knew the caller, and she could fuck off for all I cared. My first priority was Amara. Everyone else on the planet didn’t matter. Not even Gigi’s guilt trips could faze me right then.

  I found a place to park in the long-term parking lot. In the airport, I found an airline with a flight out to Tulsa that left in an hour, but there were two stops. Meaning we wouldn’t get to Tulsa until late that night. Muttering a curse, I pulled Amara into a chair with me and swiped my thumb over Emmie’s contact information.

  “What can I do for you, Cash?” my manager answered distractedly.

  “I need you to charter me a plane out to Tulsa. Now.”

  There was a small pause on her end before she exploded. “What the fuck is going on?”

  Amara seemed to be in shock now, lost in her own head. I pressed a kiss to her temple and told Emmie everything I knew.

  “Fuck. Okay. I’ll take care of it. Wait for my call.”

  She hung up, and I pulled Amara onto my lap. She pressed her head to my chest, her arms hugging my neck like I was her lifeline. I pressed my lips to the top of her head and inhaled deeply. My chest was aching for her. Every tear, every small hiccup-like sob, broke me a little more.

  Less than fifteen minutes later, Emmie was calling me back. I got the details from her and was already walking through the airport with Amara tucked into my side. “Take care of that girl, Cash. I’ll do what I can from this end.”

  I didn’t need her or Riley to tell me to take care of Amara. She was everything I cared about, and I wasn’t about to let her go through this alone.

  --

  It wasn’t until we were in the air that Amara seemed to snap out of the daze she had fallen into. We were on the long couch, the clouds all around us, with Amara’s head in my lap as I stroked my fingers through her hair, when she gasped and jerked upright.

  “Where are we?”

  I pushed the hair back from her face, stroking my thumb over her jaw. “We’re on our way to Tulsa.”

  Her eyes darted around the main cabin, a frown tucked between her brows. “But this is a private jet.”

  “There were no immediate flights that would have gotten us there soon enough, so I had Emmie charter this for us.” I pulled her onto my lap and tucked her head under my chin. “We should be there in a few hours. Just rest until we land, baby. I’ve got you.”

  She sighed heavily, her fingers playing with mine. The male flight attendant appeared from the front of the plane, a cup of strong, extra sweet coffee in hand. He gave me a grim smile as he handed the mug over and returned to his place with the pilot.

  Stroking her hair with one hand, I helped her drink the coffee with the other. When it was half empty, she pushed my hand away. “No more. I don’t want it.”

  “Emmie said it would help with the shock,” I told her.

  “Emmie…” She broke off with a sad laugh, shaking her head. “This day just keeps getting weirder and weirder.”

  “I’m sorry, baby.”

  “Did you know she was going to offer me a job?” she asked, looking up at me with swollen, red-rimmed fawn eyes.

  Her question surprised the hell out of me. “No. I had no idea. What kind of job?”

  “It was a really bizarre meeting. She told me about her past, and then said she liked me. That she considered me family now. Then she said we could help each other. She had three openings that needed filling and said I could have whichever job I wanted.” She pressed her face into my neck, hiding her eyes from me. “I hope her kids know how lucky they are to have a mom like her.”

  I could feel just how close she was to breaking down again, so I remained quiet. Letting her digest what was on her mind, or cry if that was what she needed to do. I rubbed my hands up and down her back, just thankful that I was able to be here with her. That I was the one she had called first after getting such devastating news.

  In the weeks I’d known this girl, she had become everything to me. I could feel her pain as if it were an entity living in my chest. I wanted to make this all better for her, but I knew losing her dad wasn’t something I could fix. It was a helpless kind of feeling, not being able to take away her pain.

  I held her for the entire flight, wiping away her tears when they fell, pushing my strength into her when I knew she needed it the most. At one point, she fell asleep in my arms, and I took the chance to see if any of the news channels were covering the explosion. Two of the national news networks had it running on the bottom
of their broadcast. Six men were dead following an explosion. Rescue crews couldn’t find their bodies, but it was determined they couldn’t possibly have survived the intensity of the blast and fire.

  Fuck. I was hoping it was all just a mistake. That by the time we got to her dad’s house, he would be in the hospital with maybe a broken leg and some burns, but alive. Then they started talking about the story, showing aerial footage of the explosion site, and I knew in my gut there was no chance her father could have survived that. No one could have.

  She stirred in my arms, whimpering in her sleep, and I tossed my phone aside. Kissing her temple, I whispered in her ear that she was okay. I had her and wasn’t going to let anything hurt her. Ever.

  When the plane landed, she stumbled to her feet, but I lifted her into my arms. She was like a weak kitten as I carried her off the plane. There was a car already waiting on the tarmac beside the plane. The driver opened the back door for us, and I sat Amara inside before joining her.

  “She okay?” the short, stout, fiftyish man asked as he looked at Amara in the review mirror.

  “Not today,” I told him honestly. “But she will be.” I’d make sure of it.

  I had no idea where we were going, but Emmie must have already told the driver the address. An hour later, just as the sun was starting to fade in the distance, we were pulling into the driveway of a single-story brick house with a well-maintained lawn and a minivan parked outside. As soon as the car was turned off, the front door opened, and a plump woman with short, curly dark hair ran out to meet us.