Her Benny: A Story of Street Life
CHAPTER IX.
Tempted.
Where the watching, waiting angels Lead them from the shadow dim, To the brightness of His presence Who has called them unto Him,-- Little hearts for ever stainless, Little hands as pure as they, Little feet by angels guided, Never a forbidden way.
Towards the close of February Nelly caught a very severe cold, whichkept her indoors for several days. One night her cough had been so badthat she had scarcely slept at all, and when she got up in the morning,with flushed cheeks and hollow eyes, unrested and unrefreshed, grannyinsisted that she was not fit to go out, and that she must stay indoorsand keep herself warm.
Benny was very sorry to lose her earnings, for, alas! it had been a hardstruggle for the children to find the necessary coppers day by day topurchase food and pay for their lodgings; and had it not been for JoeWrag's kindness, they would often have fared much worse. Nelly knew thisvery well, and hence it was a great trial to her to stay indoors doingnothing, while her Benny was out fighting the world alone.
"How will yer manage, Benny?" she said, with an anxious look in hereyes, the first morning that he went out alone.
"Oh, never fear, Nell, I'll 'cumulate the coppers somehow," was theresponse.
"What's 'cumulate, Benny?" for it was the first time he had ventured touse that word in her hearing.
"Well, I might a-knowed," he said, putting on a knowing look, "that youwould not hundercumstand sich words, 'cause as how you don't seem tocare for larnin' like me."
"Well, you 'ave not told me now, Benny."
"Oh, it means as how I'm bound to get the coppers somehow."
"How _somehow_, Benny? You'll only get 'em the right way, will yer, now?"
"Never fear, Nell; I's not goin' to steal 'em."
"But if you dunna get enough, Benny?"
"Oh, I'll go hungry for a day or two; 't won't be fust time I's done it."
"Poor Benny!" and she placed her wasted hand on his shoulder. "But I'ope it will be true, what Joe told me t'other night."
"What did he tell yer?"
"Well, he said the good Lord was sure to provide; that is, you know,Benny, He willna let us starve."
"I dunno much about _Him_, Nell."
"Oh, but Joe 'as told me lots an' lots about Him; an' He never says whatHe doesna mean; an' if He says He'll provide, He will, Benny."
"Anyhow, I shall be glad to see it," was Benny's observation, as hewalked away, leaving Nelly standing at the door.
He found the days very long without a sight of his sister's face frommorn till eve. But he bore up bravely, and hurried home as early ashe possibly could when the day's toil was over. Nobody knew how much"little Nell" was to him: she had been the only comfort of his cheerlesslife, and when the world seemed more rough and unfriendly than usual, itwas Nelly who stood by his side like a ministering angel, encouraginghim still to persevere.
The sight of her sweet patient face in the evening was like abenediction to him, and after the frugal meal they would sit on thefloor with their arms around each other before granny's fire. And Bennywould tell his sister all the experiences of the day; making light,however, of the difficulties and disappointments, and magnifying everylittle pleasure that had fallen to his lot.
It was wonderful how thoughtful he was of his sister, and how heanticipated her every want. He would not give her a moment's pain on anyconsideration if he could possibly help it. Yet Nelly always knew whenhe was in trouble, though he said nothing about it; for experience hadmade her quick to detect his every mood.
One afternoon, as Benny was passing along a narrow and not veryfrequented street, he paused before a small hosier's shop. A great manythings had been hung outside the door to catch the eye of the passer-by.But one article especially attracted his attention, and that was awoollen "cross-over."
"Golly!" he said to himself, "if Nelly only had that, she'd be better inno time."
Nelly had been much better that morning, and but for the keen east windthat had been blowing for several days, she would have again venturedinto the streets. And as Benny looked again and again at the cross-over,he thought how nice she would look with it crossed over her chest, andhow nice and snug and warm it would make her feel. No cold, he was sure,could come through a thing like that; and it was the cold, granny said,that made her cough so much.
But he knew he could not purchase it, so with a sigh he turned away. Yetin less than half an hour he was standing before the shop again.
"They would never miss it," he muttered to himself, "an' Nelly needs itso much."
Then a voice within him whispered, "Don't steal, Benny," and again hewalked away. But the tempter followed and gave him no rest.
"I could cut the string as easy as that," he said to himself, snappinghis fingers. "And it ain't for myself that I wants it, and I dunna thinkit can be so very wrong to take it for little Nell, when she's so ill."
While he was musing thus, he was startled by a voice near him,
"Hullo, Ben, are 'e goin' to a funeral, yer look so glum?"
Looking up a narrow entry, he saw a lad that went by the name of"Perks," engaged in trying on a pair of shoes, that were evidently new,though they had been well plastered with mud.
Perks was not so big as Benny, though he was two or three years older.He was a strange-looking lad. A great shock of fiery red hair made hator cap totally unnecessary. His face was plain, looked at under anycircumstances, but a look of low cunning made it at times appear almostrepulsive.
Perks was no friend of Benny's, who rarely took the trouble to replywhen addressed by him. Benny knew that he was not honest. He never soldmatches, and rarely carried parcels, and yet he had generally plentyof coppers at his disposal, and wore better clothes than any of thestreet lads. But to-day Benny was in a different humour to what he wasgenerally. He had permitted an evil spirit to take possession of him,and so was not so particular about his company.
So he walked up the entry close to where Perks sat, and pointing to theshoes, said in a whisper,
"Where'd yer get them?"
"Walked 'em," was the response.
"That is, stole 'em, ain't it?"
"Gem'men of our per-fession don't say stole, it ain't perlite," saidPerks, trying to look important.
"It means that, though," said Benny.
"Well, I admit I took 'em without leave, as I takes most things; it'smost conwenient."
"How did yer manage?" said Benny.
"So yer wants to take up the per-fession, does yer?" And there was acunning leer in his eye as he spoke.
"No, I don't," said Benny, colouring up.
"What yer ax me for 'ow I did it, then?"
"For fun."
"No doubt. But, I'll tell yer, nothin' is easier. Folks hang thingsoutside on purpose to be stole. I took up the per-fession 'cause Icouldn't 'elp it. Shop-keepers put things right under my nose, an' mademe take 'em against my will at fust. Now I's no feelin' 'bout it at all."
"'T ain't right, though, nohow," said Benny.
Perks was about to sneer at this remark, but thought better of it, andanswered, after a pause,
"Well, if it ain't, I's not to blame. Folks just put things in my way;an' a chap's not to blame for eatin' butter when it's put in his mouth."
To this Benny ventured no remark. And Perks having fastened on the shoesto his satisfaction, said, "Come with me a minute," and together theywalked off into a more crowded thoroughfare.
Poor Benny! in such a state of mind as he was, he could not have falleninto worse hands. He was fast getting into the toils of the tempter; andwho should deliver him?
For awhile Benny and Perks walked on in silence, when suddenly Perksclutched his arm and whispered in his ear,
"Look alive, an' I'll show yer a bit of nice play."
"What yer mean?" said Benny.
"Yer see that man afore us, with a bit o' his hankecher peepin' out o'his pocket?"
"Ay."
"Well, there's another chap walking alongsi
de o' him, an' comin' downthe street is three or four more; don't 'e see as how they'll all meetby that lamp-post? Well, ther'll be a bit o' crush, an' I'll just popin atween 'em at the same time onexpected, an' for a moment we'll besixes an' sevens, an' then the thing is done."
And off Perks darted like the wind. Benny did not wait to see how hesucceeded in his undertaking. The poisonous seed had taken root in thesoil that had been prepared for its reception, and Benny hurried awayto the hosier's shop, alas! already a thief in heart, if not in action,for he had made up his mind to take the cross-over if anything like afavourable opportunity presented itself.
"I's not to blame for takin' things," he said, using Perks's words, "ifpeople puts 'em right in one's way."
It was getting dusk, and in this narrow street it was darker than in thestreet he had just left.
Yes, there was the cross-over. And, after looking at all the windowsin the neighbourhood, to see that no one was watching him, he glidedstealthily up to the door. The shopkeeper was busy inside. "So much thebetter," he thought. "Now's the time," and he stretched out his hand tograsp the coveted article, when a hand was laid upon his arm with a firmgrip, and, turning, he saw a face that made the perspiration ooze fromhim at every pore.
Leaving Benny for a moment to recover his fright, we will go back toTempest Court, and have a look at Nelly. She had been restless and illat ease all the day--a sign, granny said, that she was getting better;and, indeed, she felt much better in body, though she was uneasy inmind, and, as the day kept fine and got much warmer as the hours woreon, she determined she would go out and see how Benny was getting on,for she had a vague presentiment that all was not right.
On reaching the landing-stage she looked anxiously around, but Bennywas nowhere visible. This did not trouble her much, but after loiteringaround for a good part of an hour, and he did not come, she began tofeel alarmed; still she waited around, till, unable longer to bear theburden of suspense, she started off to search for him. Up one streetand down another she went, looking here and there and everywhere, butwithout avail.
Just before four o'clock she made her way to the old trysting-place bySt. George's Church, in the hope that Benny might do the same; but,alas! she was doomed to disappointment, for he did not come; and whenshe saw the daylight begin to fade, she got frightened, feeling surethat some evil had befallen "her Benny."
Evil, alas! had befallen him, though not of the nature that she hadfeared.
At length she saw some one turn up a narrow street that looked likeBenny. She could not be certain, but she would follow and see; so withbeating heart she hurried up the street.
Yes, it was Benny; she was near enough to recognize him now. But whenshe saw--as she did at a glance--what he was about to do, her heartstood still for a moment; the next moment she hurried forward with thefleetness of the wind, and laid her hand upon his arm, unable to speak aword.
For two or three seconds the children looked at each other in silence,then Nelly took her brother by the hand and led him away. She uttered noword of reproach, she only said, "My poor Benny!" and her great roundeyes filled with tears, which rolled silently down her wasted cheeks.
"It was for you, Nelly. I thought 't would warm yer. I wouldna 'ave doneit for myself."
And again came the words, in a choking voice, "My poor Benny!"
"I didna think it wur so very wicked, seein' as you is so ill, Nelly. Isyou very mad at me, Nell?"
"I's not mad, Benny, but I's sorry--oh, so sorry! I did not think----"
But here she broke off abruptly: she would utter no word of reproach,for she knew it was all out of love for her.
That evening she could eat no supper. Benny knew the reason and did notpress her, but her silent grief nearly broke his heart. He would rathersuffer anything himself than see his sister suffer. And yet now he hadgiven her keener pain than words could tell.
In the middle of the night he awoke and found her sobbing by his side asthough her little heart would break, and he knew that he was the causeof her grief.
"Don't take on so, Nell," he said, in a voice that had the sound oftears in it. And he drew her tear-stained face towards him and kissedher affectionately.
But she only sobbed the more.
"Do forgive me, Nell," he said. "I's very sorry."
"I 'as nothin' to forgive you for, Benny; you's always been good to me.Ax the dear Lord to forgive yer."
"I knows nowt about Him, Nell."
"But He knows about you, Benny--Joe says so; and He sees everything wedoes. Ax Him."
"Could He hear if I wur to ax Him?"
"Yes, Joe says as He hears everything."
"Then I'll try Him," said Benny, and, sitting up in bed, he commenced,--
"If you plaise, Mr. God, I's very sorry I tried to stole; but if you'llbe a trump an' not split on a poor little chap, I'll be mighty 'bligedto yer. An' I promise 'e I won't do nowt o' the sort agin'."
"There, will that do, Nell?"
"Say Amen."
"Amen," said Benny, and he lay down to listen for the answer.
But after waiting a long time and no voice broke the stillness of thenight, and Nelly having fallen asleep, our hero concluded that _she_ hadreceived the answer, as she seemed so much comforted; so he thought thathe might go to sleep also, which he accordingly did, and did not awaketill late in the morning, when he saw his sister bending over him with acalm face, from which all trace of pain had fled, and a beautiful lightshining in her eyes.
This satisfied him that his prayer had been answered, and once more hisheart was at peace.