Trust Me

  Mom had this thing about me trying to grow up too fast. If she had her way I’d be a kid forever.

  Slipping on my flip-flops, I looked down at my bare toenails and thought of my grandma. But I didn’t have time to do the nails justice. Besides, I’d be splashing through water on the way to the activities hut anyway. I slipped on the bright yellow rain poncho that we were required to bring to camp.

  Liz, Caryn, and Torie were all wearing theirs as well.

  “I hate these things,” Torie said, tugging on her poncho. “You know what I’m saying?”

  “Better than an umbrella,” Caryn said.

  We pranced our way over to the activities hut, trying to avoid the puddles that were growing bigger and bigger as the rain continued to fall. Of course the guys were standing on the porch beneath the overhang, laughing like they’d never seen anyone running through the rain.

  Weren’t only mature guys supposed to be selected as CITs?

  Inside the building was nice, warm, and best of all, dry. We hung our ponchos on the pegs beside the door.

  “You think we’ll do face painting?” Liz asked.

  “We’re not campers,” I said. “We’re CITs.”

  “True. So what do you think we’ll do?”

  “Climb on a table and fall off?” I asked.

  “Can you do a table, or will you freeze up again?”

  “I was kidding,” I said.

  “So what was happening with you earlier?” Liz asked. “You looked terrified.”

  Great. So much for thinking I was masking my true feelings.

  “I’m just not into jumping off high things.”

  “I didn’t know that,” she said.

  “It’s not something I really like to talk about.”

  “But I’m your best friend. Didn’t you trust me?”

  “It wasn’t a matter of trust, it was just…embarrassing. Don’t you have any secret fears?” I asked.

  “Yeah. That Trent won’t like me as much as I like him. I’m really starting to crush on him, Jess. It’s kinda scary.”

  Neither of us had ever had a boyfriend before, so all the feelings that come from liking someone and him actually liking you back were kind of strange. Or at least I figured they would be. I didn’t like anyone at the moment and certainly didn’t have anyone liking me.

  “How can he not like you enough? You’re awesome.”

  “You only think that because you’re my best friend.”

  “I think it because it’s true. Besides, remember when we took that quiz in Teen People a few months back? According to that, we’re both ready for a serious boyfriend.”

  “Yeah, but you and I always do well on quizzes. You know, I really do wish we’d do face painting. I wouldn’t mind painting a heart on Trent’s cheek.”

  “I’m sure Terrific Trent would love that.”

  “Hey, I might even be willing to paint Sean’s cheek.”

  “You’re kidding me.”

  “No, I’d put a ‘stay away from my best friend’ sign.”

  I rolled my eyes. “He can’t, though. We’re partners.”

  “And getting to be cozy partners at that. He knew how to get you to jump off that tower. He knew you a lot better than I did. Be careful, Jess. He’s going to make you like him and then he’ll betray you. You can’t trust him.”

  “I don’t trust him.”

  “Hey, partner,” Sean said.

  I wondered how much of the conversation he’d heard. But it didn’t really matter because I’d only spoken the truth, and he knew exactly how I felt anyway.

  “I think we’re going to get the afternoon away from each other,” I said.

  “No such luck,” Sean said. “At least a hundred different team-building activities can be done indoors.”

  “Why do you know so much about team building?”

  “Because I researched the activities. They’re great for keeping the brats at home under control when I have to babysit.”

  “The brats? That’s a nice way to refer to your family.”

  “Hey, you try taking care of six—”

  “We’ll be taking care of a lot more than that in another week.”

  “But we won’t be related to them.”

  “And that makes a difference?”

  “You bet. They can’t start screaming, ‘I’m gonna tell Mom.’”

  I laughed. Sean grinned. “I finally said something you like.”

  I shook my head. “It’s just that every conversation with Alex starts that way.”

  “Alex is your brother?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I bet he’s a total pain.”

  For the first time in my life I felt a need to defend my brother. He was, in fact, a pain, but it seemed a betrayal to admit it to Sean. “He’s okay.”

  “So you have a younger brother named Alex. See, it only took me two days to find that out. By the end of summer, I’ll know all your secrets.”

  “Why do you even care?” I asked.

  He seemed surprised by the question. “Because you’re my partner.”

  “Only for the week, Sean. Then we’ll never have to hang out again. I don’t hang with cheaters.”

  “What if I had a good reason for what I did?”

  I stared at him. “You did have a reason, but it wasn’t a good one. You wanted to win.”

  “Another reason.”

  “Like you wanted me to lose?”

  “Forget it.”

  Edna blew her whistle. And following her instructions, our little circle of two—Sean and me—grew to include Liz and Trent. Each group had to stand in front of an easel. It had a huge pad of paper on it because it was used for all kinds of artwork and projects.

  “This exercise is called ‘Marooned,’” Edna said. “You’re going to be stranded on a desert island. I want your team to list five items the team would have with it if you thought you might be marooned. You’ve got five minutes. Go!”

  She clicked her stopwatch. Geez, just like my hand curled in permanent cell-phone-holding position, her stopwatch seemed to be her handheld device of choice.

  “Okay, water,” Trent said and wrote it on our tablet of paper.

  “No, way,” Liz said. “We’re on an island. There’s plenty of water.”

  “Could be salt water,” Trent said.

  “But fresh water is bound to be somewhere on the island,” Sean said. “Or we could harvest rain.”

  “How would we harvest rain?” I asked.

  “We’ll have to figure that out later,” Liz said. “We only have five minutes.” She crossed out water.

  It was a little strange to see Liz taking charge. I didn’t know if she was doing it to impress Trent or if she was really getting into the whole leadership thing. Maybe it was a little of both.

  “A gun,” Trent said.

  “We can build traps with whatever the landscape has to offer,” Sean said.

  I looked at him. “You’re really into nature.”

  He grinned. “I’m into survival.”

  “The John Locke of CLS,” Trent said, referring to a character on Lost.

  “That works for me,” Sean said.

  “So what do we need?” I asked, practically hearing the seconds ticking away on Edna’s stopwatch. “Cell phone is useless. We can’t even get a signal here.”

  “A hunting knife,” Sean said.

  Sounded reasonable. I wrote it on the paper.

  “Matches,” Trent said.

  Sean nodded. “So we could have signal fires.”

  “You’re assuming we want to be found,” Liz said. “Maybe being marooned is the best thing to happen to us. No school, no parents. Totally on our own.”

  “We could use a fire for other things,” I said. “Like cooking the food we catch in traps and keeping warm.”

  “Chocolate,” Liz said suddenly, totally taking our list to a new level. “We gotta have chocolate.”

  Feeling like being silly, I wrote it down. I no lon
ger cared what Edna thought. This exercise was pointless. We were never going to be marooned.

  “You’re not taking our list seriously,” Trent said.

  “Not really, no,” Liz said.

  “Okay. Then I want my iPod Shuffle.”

  “Done,” I said. This is actually getting to be fun, I thought.

  “Red nail polish,” Sean said.

  I jerked my head around and stared at him.

  “Why would you take that?” Trent asked as though Sean had suggested we take dog poop.

  Sean smiled. “So Twinkle Toes here will be happy.”

  Whenever he’d called me Twinkle Toes before, it had made me angry. But it didn’t this time. I didn’t know why. Maybe because he hadn’t said it like it was a put-down.

  “Time!” Edna called.

  We all looked at each other, then at our list. I was sorta wishing Liz hadn’t crossed out gun. As far as working as a team, we were pretty pitiful. We were going to be stranded on a deserted island eating chocolate, painting our toenails, listening to music by a fire while Sean cut things up. Great. Just great.

  Edna made the rounds, reading aloud everyone’s survival list. It was interesting. It seems that surviving wasn’t the point. Agreeing on our list was.

  So maybe I was going to make it as a counselor after all.

  Question thirteen: “Do you know how to compromise?”

  Check!

  Chapter Twelve

  By Thursday all the leadership training and learning to work together seemed to be getting us somewhere. I just wasn’t sure where. Since the “Marooned” exercise, our two-person teams had morphed into permanent four-person teams. Liz, Trent, Sean, and me. We were even eating our meals together. Although Sean being there might have been by default.

  I mean, I didn’t actually invite Sean to join us, but Trent was hanging really closely to Liz, and she was all about being with him. I couldn’t believe how well they got along. Talk about partnering up.

  Liz and I had spent the spring researching games for our campers to play and craft projects to keep them entertained on rainy days. I wanted to be the best counselor ever.

  I’d thought my partner in all this would be Liz. Not Sean.

  And I hated to admit that he was a little interesting. And sometimes funny.

  “You know, we made a big mistake with our ‘Marooned’ list,” Sean said now, as we were sitting at the breakfast table.

  “Yeah?” Trent said, around a mouthful of bacon.

  The food was buffet style, all you could eat. For the CITs anyway. For now. Once camp got underway, it would all be limited to one helping. Otherwise they’d run out of food quickly because guy campers could eat a lot!

  Sean punched his fork into his pancake and lifted it. “We should have added CLS’s pancakes to our list of things we’d want with us on a deserted island. These things are rubbery enough we could probably use them to build a raft.”

  “They are pretty bad,” Trent said. “But they’re better than my mom’s. She can’t cook at all.”

  “My mom was a really good cook,” Sean said.

  “Was?” I asked.

  He looked over at me like he’d said something he wished he hadn’t. “She died a few years back.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “My dad remarried last year. Kate. She has three kids. We’re a regular Yours, Mine, and Ours family.”

  “That movie was so bad,” Liz said, like his reference to a movie was the most important thing he’d said.

  “That must have been hard,” I said.

  “Watching that movie was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done,” Liz said. “Honestly, I almost had to get up and leave. Remember how we—”

  “Liz,” I said, cutting her off, wondering when in the last few days she’d lost the ability to read my mind. It was like Trent had messed up our being in sync. “I wasn’t talking about the movie.”

  “Oh, sorry.”

  “No big deal,” Sean said. “I adjusted. Being able to come to camp every summer really helped. Both after I lost my mom and when I got a new mom.”

  I wondered if his new family had messed him up. If he’d felt a need to cheat because he’d felt a need to win.

  “Billy…” I said slowly, trying to remember. “I don’t remember him coming before last summer.”

  “Last summer was his first time. Dad thought it would help us bond. I had two younger sisters, Billy had two baby sisters. Neither of us was used to having a brother around.”

  “Did it help?” I asked, wondering why I suddenly cared. Was I just feeling sorry for him?

  “Not really. But like I said, no big deal.”

  Only I was starting to wonder if it had been a big deal.

  After breakfast, we had a session on first aid. How to stanch the flow of blood. How to stabilize a broken arm. We were all given small first aid kits that we were supposed to start carrying in our backpack at all times.

  Then we broke for lunch, with instructions to ready ourselves for an intense hike in the woods, a lesson on survival.

  Knowing Edna, it would include a lesson on trust as well. I wondered what she was going to have us fall off of now.

  “So what do you think is up with the survival hike?” Liz asked.

  “It must be dangerous,” Torie said. “Why else give us the first aid training first? You know what I’m saying?”

  I did know what she was saying, but I figured she was overreacting. “They’re not going to put us in a truly dangerous situation,” I said. “But we need to know what to do in case we take the younger campers hiking. So they’ll teach us how to avoid poison ivy and snakes. It’s no big deal.”

  “Actually,” Jon said, “last year one of the counselors told me that training got kinda hairy at the end. That their trainers took them out into the woods and left them.”

  “Like what? Hansel and Gretel?” Caryn asked.

  He shrugged. “I guess.”

  “Why would they do that?” I asked.

  “Why do they do any of this stuff?” Trent asked.

  “So we learn to rely on each other, trust each other,” Sean said.

  “I don’t think leaving us out in the woods would accomplish that,” I said.

  “They mentioned survival,” Liz reminded me.

  “So I’ll pack water, my flashlight, and my cell phone,” I said.

  “Like our cell phones will do us any good,” Liz said.

  Before we headed out, Edna and Ed had made our two-person CIT teams count off. Sean and I were Team Eight. I wasn’t certain how we always ended up being last, but for some reason we did.

  And that was kinda cool because being in the back put us far away from Edna and Ed who were leading the group. It meant we were less likely to get into trouble.

  I took my cell phone out of my pocket and turned it on. “No signal,” I muttered.

  “Could be the trees,” Sean said.

  “That’s what Liz thought,” I said. “I think it has to do with how far away we are from anything remotely civilized.”

  “Why would you want to call and talk with anyone when you have me to talk to?” Sean asked.

  I pointed the camera at him and clicked a picture. Now why did I do that? Now I not only had Sean walking beside me but proof of his existence in my camera. It was easy enough to delete the picture…only I didn’t.

  I told myself that as much as I disliked him, he was a camp memory. Right, Jess. The truth was, over the past few days he’d grown on me. Not enough that I trusted him completely. Not enough that I was entirely comfortable with liking him. But enough that I thought if the past four summers had never happened, if I’d met him for the first time this summer, that I might be crushing on him like Liz was crushing on Trent.

  That was a scary thought.

  “Did you just take a picture of me?” he asked.

  “No, the fauna behind you,” I lied. Now who was a liar? I took a picture of Liz and Trent trudging in front of us. They
were walking so closely together I was surprised they didn’t bump into each other.

  I took a picture of one of the trees.

  “That’s a cool phone,” Sean said. “Can I see it?”

  “Sure.” I handed it to him.

  He snapped a picture of me. “E-mail it to me when you get home,” he said, grinning.

  I took my camera back. “I’ll have better things to do,” I said. Although I wasn’t sure what they would be. I glanced over at him. “I’ll see.”

  Ed and Edna called for a stop.

  “Team One!” Edna called out, which seemed silly to me since Team One was standing right in front of her. But I figured she had a point to make.

  She removed a handful of bandannas from her backpack.

  “All week we’ve been preparing you for this moment,” she said. “The moment of absolute trust. We’re going to take each team to a different drop-off point. One team member will be blindfolded and led back to camp by the other team member.”

  I stared at the bandanna she’d handed me. Was this a hint that I was supposed to be the blindfolded team member? That I was supposed to trust Sean to lead me back to camp?

  “Team One, you’ll head back from here,” she said. “Teams Three, Five, and Seven, follow me. The rest of you follow Ed.”

  Liz spun around and looked at me, looked at Sean. She gave me a weak smile. “See you back at camp.”

  “Right,” I said. “Good luck.”

  She and Trent hurried to catch up with Edna.

  “This way,” Ed said, indicating a path that went in the opposite direction from the one Edna had taken.

  “Aren’t you worried that we’ll all get lost?” I asked as I fell into step behind him and the others.

  “Nah, little lady. I’m not going to take you that far off the beaten path. All you’ll have to do is yell really loudly and I’ll find you.”

  I was actually quite proud of myself. Not once during the entire trek, as Ed released one group after another to find their way back, did I make a sarcastic comment about trust. Mainly because I was spending a great deal of time thinking that if I was blindfolded, Sean would be leading me. Holding my arm. Walking really, really close to me.