Kink

  So simple, yet so astonishingly intense and intimate.

  Wow.

  It’s official. Paul Jarman blows my mind. Forget my mind. He amazes and shocks every part of me. I’ve never experienced anything like sex with him. Orgasms are easy, I had no idea what I was capable of.

  Not long ago, I found it impossible to climax during sex. I pleasured myself for any possible chance of release. My self-generated orgasms used to be comfortably satisfying, like a pleasant sea breeze on a hot day.

  With Paul, my orgasms rip me from the face of planet Earth and spin me off into the heavens with the intensity of a tornado.

  His presence overwhelms me. I realize now that I’ve never really given myself to any man. I’d never been able to let go. Or maybe it’s the other way around.

  Until Paul came along, I’d never been taken.

  Speaking of being taken, why the hell won’t he fuck me? It’s like he’s intentionally denying me. If he’s trying to make me desperate for it, it’s working.

  Seeing him jerk himself off up close and personal was super-hot, but it only increased my desire. I want to feel him buried deep inside of my body. My empty core aches with hunger, my poor pussy is starving.

  While his fingers make me feel good and can even make me climax, they don’t satisfy my desire. This longing is an intense animal need. I really, really, crave his cock.

  He lies on the bed beside me, softly stroking my breasts, ribs and stomach. He’s already examined my wrists for chafing and massaged my arms, checking for strain. Strong and protective, Paul is all alpha male. A warm glow saturates my senses while under his care. I feel safe, treasured and desired.

  His dark eyes flare with naked lust. The man is ready to go again. I’m exhausted, but just seeing his raw hunger instantly makes me wet and ready for him. Is he turning me into a nymphomaniac?

  “Em, my darling, there’s a matter that we need to discuss.”

  “Oh?”

  “You’ve been a bad girl,” he says, the disapproving tone of his voice is formidable yet alluring. “You touched me without permission, earlier. You broke one of my rules.”

  Uh oh. A tendril of anxiety travels down my spine. “What does that mean?” I ask, suddenly breathless. But I already know the answer.

  “You need to be punished.” His hazel eyes are hard; and his voice is no nonsense.

  Still bound by my wrists, I shudder. My heart thuds heavily in my chest as it speeds up. Where is that lovely warm glow I basked in just seconds ago?

  I tremble as every nerve I have comes alive. Now I feel scared, vulnerable and trapped. But I’m also excited. Really excited. It’s a strange mixture, this powerful adrenaline spike of confusing emotions that Paul stirs in me so easily.

  My bottom is still sore from the brushing and spanking that he gave me a few hours ago. Trying to calm myself, I take a deep, audible breath.

  Paul reads the anxious tension in my body and his expression softens. “You’re still so new to this, sweetheart,” he says, pressing his lips to mine. His warm hand travels along my throat, to my nape. Casually, yet firmly, he grips me with proprietary ease. Why does this both arouse and comfort?

  “It’s a punishment, so it’ll hurt,” he calmly informs me. “But it’ll be okay, I swear. I know that you’re scared, but you’re going to like it afterwards. I’ll reward you for accepting my discipline.”

  I bite my lip and consider this. My thighs press together automatically, as my hungry pussy clenches. I've spent my life avoiding and dreading pain. Yet, the agony of that spanking was fucking incredible; delicious, sensual and exquisite.

  During kinky sex, pain combines with fear, excitement and anticipation. It’s an adrenaline and endorphin charged cocktail.

  This amazing roller coaster ride is more than just fun. I'm learning about myself and how my mind and my body work. It's unbelievable. I love it. Despite my natural reluctance, the thought of Paul punishing me turns me on like nothing else.

  “Tell me what you thought of your spanking,” he demands.

  I immediately smile with remembered pleasure. Tension in Paul’s body, that I hadn’t even noticed, relaxes.

  I take another deep breath. “You spanking me and enjoying it makes me hot. It’s a control thing, isn’t it? A confirmation of your power over me. The punishing blows from your hand…” I clear my throat, remembering how personal it was. “Well, at one point I did almost come from it. That heavy, thudding rhythm absolutely rocked my insides. It was kind of like a hard, rough fuck, I guess.”

  Paul gives me a knowing grin.

  I make a sound, a cross between a snort and a giggle. “I don’t know if I’ll ever learn to like pain. But afterwards? Well, you already know. I actually passed out with the intensity of that orgasm.”

  “And so?”

  “I liked it. It was an amazing turn on.”

  His smile is both pleased and predatory; his eyes shine with raw lust. Thrilled, I simply melt. “Good,” he says, darkly, “because I intend to punish you.”

  My body quivers. Jesus. I’ve read books about power exchange. Paul and I have discussed BDSM at length and I’ve talked about it with Kelly Flynn, my good friend who fell in love with and married her Dom. While I give up my control, in part that’s an illusion. I have the ultimate power. I can safeword anytime. I can say ‘no.’

  Still. Paul sure knows how to put the fear of God into me. And I want to submit to him.

  BDSM is like visiting a kinky Amusement Park. Once you pay the entry fee, you hop on an erotic roller coaster of deviant self-discovery. Although I have the threat of pain before me, I’m not even close to wanting to get off of this ride. It’s such a fucking thrill. Or is that a thrilling fuck? Whatever. Either way, it’s as hot as hell.

  Another bizarre thought strikes me. Would there be a sign for men, perhaps? I bite my tongue at the thought of it, preventing my impulse to laugh.

  It has to be ‘THIS LONG’ to enter the ride.

  Or maybe ‘THIS HARD?’

  I have no idea why these crazy jokes run through my head, except that I’m frightened of what he’ll do next.

  A shudder rolls through me. Paul says that he’s going to punish me and I doubt that I’ll stop him. He can do pretty much whatever he wants. Anticipation, arousal and apprehension are heady mixtures in this sensual foreplay.

  Meeting his gaze, I swallow. “After, will you please fuck me? I really want you inside of me.”

  “No,” he replies. “You can’t have my cock. Not unless you beg. And you’d have to beg in a way that makes me want to give you what you want. Now,” his voice is stern and commanding. “Roll on to your stomach, face down, on your knees with your ass in the air.”

  My belly tightens, my breath stops. He’s using that sexy, inexorable Dom voice on me. I shiver and immediately scramble to do as he asks. But then it strikes me like a slap in the face. Paul isn’t asking, is he? He’s commanding me. A frisson of electricity runs down my spine and right to my sex.

  How hot is an alpha male when he takes control?

  I position myself on my knees, head down, my face on the mattress and ass up. My wrists are still bound to the headboard. Apparently they’re going to stay that way.

  Hyper alert and hypersensitive, I turn toward him. The sheets feel amazingly rough on my erect nipples.

  I can’t escape, or more precisely, I don’t want to. I’ve gotten on the erotic roller coaster and the car is climbing up, up, up.

  I can’t get off now.

  I can only hang on for the ride of my life.

  Chapter 24.

  “Initiating your partner to anal sex is like making love to a virgin. All care and consideration must be taken. Focus your attention on his or her pleasure, not on your cock.”

  – André Chevalier

  ~~~

  “That’s right, good girl,” Paul says in that sexy voice, as his hands trail down my back, soothing over my buttocks.

  The detached manner in which he runs
his palms over me is steamy as hell. It’s as if he’s checking out every dip, every contour I have, making sure that everything is in the right place.

  His every touch is a sensual caress. His commanding voice stimulates me more fully than any aphrodisiac. He’s such a strong man, so beautiful, confident and dominant. My body responds to every sight, sound and scent of him.

  Paul’s so burning hot, I’d probably get wet if he simply read the NASDAQ stock report out loud to me.

  He’s intent on what he’s doing. He taps the inside of my thighs and I obligingly spread my legs further. The cool, impassive way he controls and handles me is such a turn-on. It’s like I’m an object or a possession.

  His possession.

  He quietly studies me for a moment. Despite my arousal, I feel embarrassed by his scrutiny. Restless, I want to shift, but I know this will annoy him, so I remain still.

  To my surprise, he parts my ass cheeks. Circling my anus, a finger begins to probe my entry point. I unconsciously clench.

  “Paul?”

  “Shush,” he says. “Relax. I’m going to put a plug in your ass.”

  With no hesitation, he presses a finger inside the tight muscle. I gasp. Entering to the first knuckle, he presses the rim and pulls me open. I feel the warm slick sensation of lubrication, as he works it into my entrance.

  This is so unsettling. Why am I allowing this? Have I lost my mind? But what he’s doing makes my whole body burn with desire. It’s incredibly sexy and dirty and hot. Emotionally, it’s intense and intimate.

  For some unknown reason, my back passage suddenly clenches shut. His response is instant. I feel a sharp, hard spank on one butt cheek.

  “Open for me, Em. Pay attention.”

  “Yes, Paul,” I say, suitably chastised.

  I feel that slap as a sensual erotic pulse. Heat blooms throughout my body, particularly in my face and chest. I’m blushing. Not because his finger is in my ass, which would be logical. No, I feel ashamed because I displeased him when my body instinctively fought him.

  I don’t want to resist. I want to obey.

  I’m also aroused right out of my mind.

  Paul seems to sense this. He strokes where he struck me, in gentle, soothing circles. His attention is completely upon me as he worships my heated skin with his touch.

  I focus on loosening my sphincter muscles.

  “Good girl,” he murmurs. “That’s it. Push out, it will make it easier. You’re trying, I know it. You want to please me, don’t you?”

  “Yes, Paul.”

  He grips my hips, leans over and gently bites one butt cheek. Then he kisses me there. I figure it’s a reward, or an acknowledgment of my acceptance of his dominance and control. At least it feels like that to me.

  He returns to gently invading me with his finger, once more adding lube. It feels strange. So new. I’m anxious, but also intrigued and aroused by the thought of this forbidden act and the delicious sensations it makes me feel.

  “I’m going to put in a little latex plug, much smaller than my cock,” he adds. “It’ll start to get you used to penetration. I want this gorgeous ass of yours open and available to me. You want to be open for me, don’t you? So that I can fuck your ass?”

  There’s no point in lying to him, or to myself. “Yes, I do,” I admit.

  He chuckles. “You’re so perfect, Em. You already crave my cock. You’ll take it wherever I want to put it, won’t you? You don’t care where, because you need it, don’t you?”

  “Yes, God, yes.”

  “Tell me,” he says in a low, seductive voice. “Tell me how you feel about my cock.”

  My immediate, compulsively honest response surprises me. “I love your cock,” I say. “I need it. I want your cock in my mouth, my ass, or my pussy. I want your cum all over me and in me. You’ve turned me into a complete slut. But only for you. I only want you.”

  “Fuck, yes,” he says. “That’s right, rabbit. I’ll give you my cock, but only as a reward. You have to be very, very good before I’ll fuck you.”

  I make an inarticulate noise and try to bite off my sound of protest.

  Paul laughs and goes back to probing and pushing lube into my ass.

  I say nothing. Already I’ve learned that when it comes to sex, everything is up to him. I’m in my place. Obedient, my body available, waiting for his permission to come. With the same amount of need, I also crave his orgasms. I want him to use me for his pleasure.

  I’m learning. He’s teaching me. This is what being submissive is.

  I fucking love it.

  I shut my eyes and swallow, while my attention focuses on the erotic sensation of him inserting and moving a lubricated finger into my sensitive back passage.

  When enough lube coats me, he presses the blunt end of the plug against my opening. “Relax now, push against this and breathe out. It may burn a bit, but it shouldn’t hurt. I want you to like this. I want us both to love this.”

  He circles my anus with the end of the plug and pushes until just the tip of it is inside of me. Then he reaches down and his big warm hand, cups my mound. Surprised, I moan. It feels amazing.

  “That’s right, Em,” he says, his voice low and deep. “It feels good, doesn’t it?”

  “Oh, yes,” I say fervently.

  It does feel good. Paul knows exactly what to do with his clever fingers between my legs. He softly traces my folds, with a delicate alluring touch. He strokes and teases. I can hardly hold still.

  All the while, he’s slowly pushing the anal toy further into me. My passage relaxes for a moment, while I concentrate on the pleasure between my legs. Distracted by the utter bliss of his manipulations, Paul takes advantage of this and pushes the toy in. Somehow my anus swallows the length of it all at once and then tightens.

  “There you go. Well done. Breathe. Deep breaths.”

  Gasping and squirming, I’m assaulted by a burning sense of fullness. Despite trying to obey Paul’s command to breathe, I’m too overwhelmed to focus. I hold my breath and struggle with these sensations, trying to process them.

  “Keep breathing, Emily.”

  I concentrate as hard as I can to do as he directs. After a few moments, my back passage relaxes and I can breathe normally once more. The burning sensation decreases, leaving an odd pressure within me. It isn’t unpleasant. Just new and strange.

  Paul’s voice rings with approval. “Good girl. It’s all the way inside of you now. It looks so sexy. Do you feel how it stretches and fills you? Someday very soon, my cock will be there. I’ll be inside of you just like that, but much deeper. I’ll be balls deep inside of that gorgeous tight ass of yours. How does that sound?”

  My breath hitches. I shut my eyes, imagining Paul taking me there.

  I know the concept should scare me, but I trust him. He wants to take me there, badly. I can hear it in his voice. I love that I am what he wants, what he needs.

  He’s arousing me with something I dreaded. It’s the same way he’s introduced me to pain, to enhance pleasure. I think of his cock buried deep in my ass and I hear a loud moan. I think it’s from me.

  “Um. Yes. Good,” I gasp, half out of my mind. I can’t think clearly, because he’s circling my clit with unbearably soft strokes. All my attention is there.

  His laugh caresses me in a wave of bliss. I’m glad he’s enjoying himself.

  He spends some time masturbating me, bringing me close to release and stopping, while constantly playing with the toy that’s buried in my back passage. The man is enchanted with my butt. He’s definitely an ass man. He twists and pulls at the plug, taking it in and out, in and out. I’m desperate to have him deep inside of me.

  “Please, Paul. Please,” I beg.

  Time passes until I’m a quivering, frenzied wreck. He strokes and teases my engorged clit, in a manner expertly calculated to madden me. When I almost go over, he pulls away. I’m close, so close to climax.

  "Don’t you dare come without my permission. Do you want to co
me for me? Tell me."

  "Yes, please!"

  “You will. Right after your punishment.”

  Shit.

  Chapter 25.

  “Sensual vibrations move through the body if you lightly tap the inserted anal plug. For this it is best to use silicone.”

  – André Chevalier

  ~~~

  I groan loudly in frustration. I want to please him so badly, but I’m not sure I can hold out another second. I’m at the edge of the cliff.

  I should be scared about him punishing me, but I don’t even care right now. My entire body is like one giant, throbbing clitoris I’m so sexually stimulated. I focus on preventing my much-needed release.

  What I wouldn’t give for him to fuck me. Shit. I can’t think about that now, or I’ll come.

  I’m distracted when I hear the distinctive, jangling sound of that belt buckle of his. All of my senses come to attention. I watch as he folds the brown leather over, so he’s holding both ends. Power radiates from him as he looms over me.

  Paul is in his element. He looks at me with hard eyes, dark with desire. I swallow and can’t look away.

  He trails the leather across my back, along my buttocks. He runs it over the swollen lips of my sex and aroused clit. Goose bumps rise on my nervous flesh. I moan, because for some reason, that leather belt both terrifies and excites me.

  “Ready?” he asks.

  “Not really.”

  “I’ll go easy on you and only give you five. Do you know why I’m disciplining you?”

  “For not following the rules.”

  “That’s right.” He strokes my ass softly once more, heightening anticipation. From my peripheral vision, I see him step back and raise his arm.

  Crack!

  He strikes my right cheek.

  My butt automatically clenches and I’m aware of every inch of that damn plug. The feel of his belt against my skin is a split second of pure agony. My heart pounds, my breath shortens.

  I’m so astonished, that I don’t even scream.

  Whatever sound I make is cut off almost immediately, because as fast as I feel the pain, it’s gone, leaving an echo of past pain and only an awe inspiring throb.