Edge of End
Chapter fourteen: Hopelessness
While we sat at the wall pondering, the wind grew stronger picking up black sand and hovering it around my feet. It was getting cold. Elizabeth crawled close to me, and I put my arm around her in hope to warm her up but this wasn’t my body, and although blood would come of my wound if I was stabbed or bitten by a beast, it wasn’t hot, it was just a poor reminder of our real life. So I didn’t have to take Malcolm in my arms which I was happy about.
“What are we waiting for?” I asked Malcolm. “Sitting won’t help us.”
“Neither will walking blindly,” he grumbled. “I’m trying to remember everything Mangaliny told me about other words and build some theory in my head which will help us out of here. I’d be grateful if you shut up and let me do that.”
“Share your memories. Maybe we’ll work it out together.”
He just shook his head and stood up.
“Hey! Where are you going?”
“Quite,” he ordered crossly. “I need some time. I’ll be there,” he pointed to another broken wall.
Malcolm spun around and marched away, Elizabeth and I following him until he was out of sight.
“I hope he isn’t going to leave us here,” Elizabeth said resting her head on my shoulder.
“I guess this is where our way parts,” I said back. “I mean us and Malcolm.”
“Let’s wait a bit. Maybe he’ll find the way in his old head,” Elizabeth smiled as she said that.
I tightened my arm around her. My fingers were icy cold, my breath escaped my mouth in white clouds. If Malcolm left us here I didn’t know what I would do next. I had no idea where to start searching the escape let alone finding the light that was supposed to take me back to the real life.
“Jonathan?” Elizabeth’s voice was weak and trembling.
“Yes.”
“You think we’ll remember all this if by some miracle we survive and reach the light?” she asked.
“This place is definitely going to be one of the memories which won’t be easily erased from my head,” I chuckled.
“This isn’t happening in our heads. I mean in our real heads. What if anything that happened here won’t be attached to our souls and, waking up back on Earth, we won’t have a memory of this place?” She unlatched herself from me and looked at me mournfully. “What if I forget you?”
“Our souls are directly connected to our bodies,” I began explaining. “Remember what Malcolm told us? Also the other persons who came back from the dead remembered.”
“How do you know that? You have no memory about your past. So how do you know what they told?”
“Like I know how to drive,” I answered mildly. “I don’t have a memory of myself but somehow, here,” I pointed to my head, “is filled with a lot of random information.” I traced my finger over her cheek and brushed her hair behind her ear. “I don’t want to forget you Elizabeth. Not after what we’ve been through.”
She smiled at me. Her smile pushed the darkness away from me, and I found myself far from this hell and a bright star in my arms.
“What are you going to do when you’re back?” she asked.
I shrugged. “At first I’m going to find out who I am. Then I’ll try and change myself. Maybe I’ll gain my way to heaven next time.”
“I hope so. You are not a bad person Jonathan,” the corners of her mouth twitched. “Sure I have no clue who you were in life, but there was always living a good you in your heart. Like it’d been locked and had been biding its time.”
“Thank you,” I held my breath for a moment. “You think too much of me Elizabeth. I’m not a good person back there.”
“Do you know anything?”
The running man in the gloomy alley darkened my sight. Then his glazed eyes on me. I was more that sure I’d killed that man. I doubted it was my only sin.
“I killed men,” I let out finally. “I saw it in my vision.”
“Why would you do that?”
“That’s the part that was left out. The town knows exactly what it has to show you.”
“To suffer you,” Elizabeth added, and I nodded. “You should’ve had a good reason for that.”
“Maybe,” I averted my eyes and pursed my lips. I took some time sinking in my vision and finding myself running in the alley again. It felt more real, close to real life, as I was pursuing that man, my footsteps echoing in silence and reflecting off the short walls on both sides. I had a gun in my right hand yet pointed down to the ground but I was determined to lift it and aim the guy.
Then some fragments entered my vision, short like several frames of my life movie being replayed before my eyes in some seconds.
“We’ve found him, John,” a short, black frizzy-haired man told me.
While I’d wonder who the man was, another frame followed.
“Get everyone to there,” I recognized my voice. I was at a black car, opening the door.
Then the image was swallowed up by darkness. I reappeared at the beginning of the alley. I set of at a run.
“Cut his way,” I ordered as I ran. The frizzy-haired man leaped into the car and the wheels screech filled the air.
Next I was running again, the gun pointed to the man. A shot followed and the man crashed down to the ground. I didn’t stop, holding the gun at the man, I ran up to him. He lay there facedown, a stream of blood escaping his body and reaching my shoe. I nudged him by my foot.
My view darkened, the alley was pulled away but before another shot sounded.
“Jonathan?” I heard Elizabeth’s voice and opened my eyes. The new darkness appeared to be brighter than the one behind my mind.
Elizabeth was in my arms, quivering. Cold had reached inside my boots numbing my toes.
I took a deep breath filling my lungs with icy air. “Any news from Malcolm?”
“No,” the disappointing answer followed.
I cursed under my breath and looked away. Should we go that way? Or maybe the other way? There was nothing as long as my eyes caught the sight of that would guide us to somewhere. The door that would teleport us back into the town could be hidden anywhere.
“Everything might’ve been different if we met in real life, don’t you think?” Elizabeth curled up in my arms, and I rested my chin on her head.
“We could just walk past each other,” I said.
“Who knows,” she said in a whisper.
I looked at the wall covering Malcolm from me. Was he still there? I didn’t fully trust the old man. Should I go and check? I definitely should. I tried to shift myself.
“Elizabeth,” I said. “I’m going to check Malcolm.”
She didn’t respond. I caressed her face and hair. “Elizabeth,” I called her name again. Still silence.
Carefully I moved her away, my heart hammering, a horrible thoughts entering my head. I leaned her against the wall and bent forward to look at her face. Her eyes were closed, her breath calm, the cold wind playing with her red hair.
“Elizabeth,” I let out a mournful sound as I cupped her face. In one thing I was sure–she couldn’t be dead. But I didn’t know what she was experiencing–walking through visions or her body was close to dying back on Earth and her soul got weaker.
I sat on my knees and ran my hand through my hair. My fingers were like thin and long icicles. I shivered as a gulp of wind crossed me.
I couldn’t help Elizabeth, I had to wait. Either she’d wake up or stay like that until a demon found her. But I wasn’t ready to give up on her, and, as I sighed, I began debating a lot of ideas in my head.
Abruptly she sucked a huge gulp of air, her eyes snapped open, magnified and horrified, staring at the empty spot. Her whole body tightened as if an unbearable pain entered her and started chawing her insides. The beautiful woman I’d known and I’d been holding in my arms a moment ago was no longer there.
I jerked back instinctively, my voice refusing to leave my throat. Run or stay and help her? While I was considering an ear
-piercingly shriek escaped her mouth that pricked my eardrums, and I covered my ears with my hands.
“No!” She screamed in her full voice stretching out her hands towards me. I hesitated to take them, I just stared at her.
Then her body relaxed, her hands went down to her sides. She tilted her head, breathing rapidly.
“Elizabeth?” I found my voice again.
“She’s dead,” she said with a hiss. “She’s dead.”
“Who?”
“The girl.” She raised her eyes at me, horror playing in them. “Jonathan,” she said in an imploring voice. “I saw her in a coffin. Death had taken her.”
“Calm down,” I reached for her and cupped her face. She put her trembling hand on mine.
I heard footsteps coming from behind and peeked back over my shoulder to see Malcolm.
“I thought you left,” I said.
“I should have,” he said in annoyance. “Why did I vouch to help you? What happened?”
“She just had a vision,” I explained.
“Can’t you keep your voice in your stomach?” he arched his eyebrow. “You awoke the evil.”
“How do you–” I was interrupted by a wail coming from the deep of the night.
I jumped to my feet and looked over the wall. Only darkness. Another wail followed and I knew we were discovered.
“Fuck,” I cursed and grabbed Elizabeth’s arm. “Come on. We’ve got to move. Now!” While Elizabeth was struggling into her feet I looked at Malcolm. “You’ve come up to a plan, haven’t you?”
He gave me a sarcastic smile.
“Shit,” I murmured. “What were you doing all this time? Sleeping? Come on. We need to find another place to hide.”
Elizabeth was on her feet next to me holding my hand.
Malcolm looked at her and shook his head. “Oh, woman,” he muttered. Both Elizabeth and I ignored him. Then his eye found mine. “Which way, Mr. Smarty?”
“This way,” Elizabeth answered instead of me pointing to our left. “You’ve got to believe me on this,” she added quickly as Malcolm and I looked at her curiously.
We had no time to argue. I felt uneasiness in the darkness in front of us. Demons or soul-eaters were approaching.
“Let’s go,” I said.
We set off at a run, Elizabeth on the lead.