Slow to Grow

Mitterwald was a catcher for the Cubs in the mid 70's. The music did not stop.

  Another issue that reared its ugly head, during their residence together was the fact that several of the neighbors had the nerve to house canines in said properties. Lloyd would be watching TV at night and the dogs would start barking like dogs do for no reason, and he would get tense and his face would get red, and Mike would once again start taunting him about the noise. What=s the matter, Lloyd? You look angry? What is the problem?

  And Lloyd would storm outside and head down the alley where a rottweiler would be barking at imaginary invaders. With Mike close behind, and laughing heartily, Lloyd would start screaming at the top of his lungs for the dog to shut the fuck up. Then he would kick the fence, which would make the dog bark more. Mike would tell him to that if he kept yelling long enough the dogs would start to understand him. Lloyd would go sulk back into the house fuming. Future counseling sessions with a trained psychiatrist would determine that all of Lloyd=s noise issues could be traced back to that Yiddish prickfaced asshole, Mitnek.

  Lloyd was still anchoring weekly sportscasts on the campus radio station and was really enjoying it. He had read that graduating seniors in liberal arts programs on average were making 27 grand a year, and he figured that would be pretty cool since he was graduating in 7 months. He would get a job in sports and be on his way. He was as naive as the day he left for college, and the reality was just as cold. He wouldn=t come close to making that salary until he was pushing 30. But that was another day.

  A pretty girl named Jessica reported the news during his broadcasts, and since she was of the female gender and spoke to him without repulsion, Lloyd became hopelessly infatuated with her. Lloyd would ramble about her to his circle of friends and Mark and Mike were pretty good at tuning him out after all these years. One of the disc jockeys also knew her and took great delight in telling Lloyd that she was married, 24, and already had a three year old daughter. He was apparently a jealous prick and didn=t like how friendly the two of them were. Though Lloyd was pretty taken aback by the news.

  Fuck, figures she is married, you know it would have been nice if SHE WOULD HAVE FUCKING TOLD ME. Yeah, big guy, because you were already to sweep in and make your big move. Yeah, thank god she=s married, or else you would have totally hit that shit. Quit lying to yourself, pussy.