The Rocker Who Hates Me (The Rocker #10)
“No way. I stopped at my hotel on the way over. Didn’t want to show up looking like some damn homeless man.” He lifted his hand to cup my neck, his thumb caressing over the pulse racing at the base of my throat. “Hell, Brie. You’re so fucking beautiful. Let me in, sweetheart. I need to be with you.”
I couldn’t hide the shiver that his touch mixed with his provocative words produced. Without realizing it, I leaned toward him, silently offering myself to him. “Liam…” I moaned his name as his lips brushed over my cheek.
“Brie.” He kissed down my jaw before sinking his teeth into the sensitive skin just under my ear. “I need you, Brie. Let me in before I explode.” He ran his tongue over the small sting his teeth had left. “Please, baby? Please, let me in.”
One big hand cupped between my legs, and I was helpless to hide the fact that I wasn’t wearing panties underneath my thin nightgown—or that I was drenched with hot arousal. He sucked in a deep breath as a small whimper escaped me. “Fuck,” he bit out and buried his head in my neck. “Let me in. Now.”
I let go of the door and wrapped my arms around his neck, unable to fight what I was feeling a second longer. He shuddered as I started to kiss any part of his face I could reach. His hand left my pussy and wrapped around my waist, lifting me a few inches off the ground as he stepped into the apartment and slammed the door behind us as he moved farther inside.
The hardness of the door was cool through my thin robe and gown as he pushed me up against it. I wrapped my legs around his thighs even as he was struggling to undo his belt. I was starting to tremble with the force of my need and tried to help him. A growl escaped his delicious mouth seconds before he covered mine to distract me. I thrust my fingers into his hair, keeping him locked to me.
I was on fire. My body was one big throbbing ache as we devoured each other’s mouths in a frantic fight for satisfaction. My body was going under in one wave after another of pure unchecked desire while my brain was trying to decipher if I was still sleeping or not. For weeks I’d been dreaming of this, of having him in my arms again, of losing myself in the soul-destroying passion that I’d only ever experienced once in my life—with this man.
Sharp teeth sank into the swell of my breast and I cried out in a mixture of pain and pleasure. It was just enough pain to make my stupid brain realize this was indeed real.
Liam pulled back and we were both struggling for air. I leaned my head back against the coolness of the door, watching him through half veiled eyes as he freed himself from his jeans and boxers and tore open a condom. His fingers were trembling as badly as my own were as he rolled it down over his thick tip. Once it was in place, he guided his amazing girth to my entrance.
Just as I’d expected the first time, I thought he would slam into me. But just like the first time, he stopped, gritted his teeth, and slowly eased himself inside of me. The slight burn of my inner muscles spoke of how much he stretched me and I welcomed the small discomfort as he eased himself inch-by-inch deep inside of me.
The tip touched my womb and he stopped, breathing hard as sweat beaded on his brow. Cursing viciously, he lowered his head until his face was buried between my breasts, sucking in deep breath after deep breath. Big hands tightened on my ass to the point that I knew I’d have bruises by morning, but I didn’t care.
“Goddamn, Brie. You feel so fucking amazing.” He slowly lifted his head. Blue eyes clashed with my own and I saw clearly just how overwhelmed he was from being inside of me. It was the same for me. “I’ve dreamed of this. Ever since I got a taste of you I haven’t been able to think of anything else. You’re like a fucking drug, and it’s worse than any other addiction I’ve ever had. I can’t…” He broke off and shook his head as he pulled out a few inches before thrusting back roughly. “I can’t fight this anymore.”
I didn’t know what to say. His confession left me speechless. When he thrust again I couldn’t have said anything even if my life depended on it. I was lost in the tidal waves of pleasure that were crashing over me. My inner walls started contracting as my pussy began to drip with the building flood of release that was about to drown me.
“Ah, God.” He threw his head back. “I’ve barely started and I’m going to explode. Fucking hell, Brie. What are you doing to me?”
I opened my mouth but nothing came out except a keening cry that felt as if it was being stripped from my lungs. I was coming harder than I’d ever come in my life at the hands of the only man I’d ever loved. Yet, I despaired at the thought of the end. He was going to leave me again. In the morning I’d be alone again, with only more memories to haunt my dreams every night.
“Brie.” Liam cried my name as his entire body stiffened. I tightened my legs around his hips, holding him deep inside of me while his body gave a powerful jerk as his release washed over him.
Warm, damp lips caressed over my face long after he was finished. I stroked my fingers through his short hair as our breathing started to even out, trying to keep the tears at bay. As soon as he lifted his head, he was going to leave me. I’d have to go back to my cold bed and try to find sleep. Alone.
Fuck, why did I feel so alone all of a sudden?
His head started to lift and I clenched my eyes closed in case I wasn’t able to hide my pain from him. Strong fingers eased their hold on my ass, but he didn’t pull from my body. He tucked me closer to his chest and turned away from the door. Surprised, I tried to look up at him but he only held me closer.
“Liam?” I murmured, confused.
“I’m exhausted, baby. Give me a few minutes and we can go for round two.” He bent and laid me on my bed before straightening and pulling off his shoes and clothes. It took less than half a minute and then he was lying beside me, pulling the covers over the both of us.
I realized that my back fit perfectly against his front as he tucked my head under his chin. My surprise was slowly starting to fade, only to be replaced with contentment and I rubbed my bare ass against his thickness. He chuckled, cupped his hand between my legs and yawned. “I could get used to this.”
So could I.
I could feel him drifting off to sleep, and then knew for sure when his breathing evened out and a slight snore escaped him. I bit my lip to keep from grinning. Yeah, I could definitely get used to this…
“Son of a bitch!”
I jerked awake at the harsh curse. It took me a moment to realize where I was and who was cursing at me. I blinked open my eyes to find Liam across the bed with his hand pressed to his eye. I frowned then looked down at myself.
I was tangled in the blankets and on the other side of the bed than where I’d been when I’d fallen asleep. Sighing, I gave him an apologetic grimace. “Did I kick you?”
His glare was starting to ease into a smirk and he nodded. “If you didn’t want me to sleep with you, all you had to say was no, little Brie.”
I pushed my tangled hair back from my face. “Sorry. I’m kind of a kicker.” Okay, so that was the understatement of the century. I’ve always moved around in my sleep. Some people sleepwalk, but I tend to do all my exploring under the covers. My aunt had always teased me that I could teach kickboxing from my bed if I ever decided that music wasn’t what I wanted.
From the way Liam was still holding his eye, I had to assume she was right.
“So, that wasn’t your subtle way of telling me to get the hell out your apartment?” he murmured.
I tried to hide my shiver, but there was no hiding the fact that my nipples were diamond-hard underneath the thin material of my nightgown. “No,” I assured him. “I kind of like you here.”
Oh shut up, you dumb cow, a voice in the back of my head shouted. Stop giving him ammunition to use against you later on.
The smirk on his face turned softer, his eyes seeming almost gentle. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I whispered, ignoring that damn voice trying to caution me against letting this rocker too close.
Liam moved so fast I didn’t realize what he was doing unti
l I was lying on my back underneath him. My legs spread of their own volition and he settled between them so perfectly it was almost like he was made specifically to be there. I felt his thick hardness nudging against my entrance and had to bite back a small mewl of pleasure.
Warm lips brushed over my eyes tenderly before he captured my lips in a kiss that had me arching against him in search of relief. “Tell me to shut up anytime, but I want to run something by you.”
I blinked open my eyes when he lifted his head. “Um, okay.”
He grinned. “I don’t know if I’m going to be a good boyfriend or whatever, so I’m not going to put a label on this. But how would you feel about making this thing between us a regular occurrence?”
I was brain-dead. That had to explain it. Why else weren’t his words making any sense to me? Licking my lips, I tried not to look hopeful as I spoke. “What do you mean by ‘this thing’?”
It seemed like a good question to me, or at least a good start. His question could have any different number of meanings. Did he want to have regular late-night hookups? Would we be fuck-buddies whenever we were in the same city? Or—oh fuck, the hope was choking me on this one—or did he want something more?
His grin dimmed ever so slightly and I saw something I had never seen in Liam Bryant’s eyes before. Vulnerability. “Us. Spending time together. Going to dinner and places. Sleeping in the same bed. Falling asleep together after having the most amazing sex I’ve ever had in my life… That kind of thing.”
I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from answering him so quickly that it sounded desperate. Holy shit. Liam was really offering me what I’d been hoping for. He wanted more.
I lowered my eyes so he couldn’t read my emotions as easily. “I might like that,” I murmured. “But only if you aren’t sticking your dick in other pussies.”
His face tightened. “I can promise you that isn’t going to happen. Can you promise the same?”
I lifted a brow. “I’m pretty sure I won’t be dipping my dick in any pussies, so you’re safe there.”
His lips twitched, but he was able to fight back the grin I could see he wanted to let go. “Don’t be a smartass, Brie. You know what I’m saying.” He thrust his hips roughly against my opening, the tip of his thickness nudging my pussy lips apart but he didn’t sink into me and I nearly cried out with the pain of not having him sinking deep inside my aching body. “I want to be the only fucker who gets to sink into this tight pussy. It’s mine, little goddess.”
I whimpered as the crown of his dick skimmed over my clit.
“Say it,” he commanded in a voice tight with need. “Tell me that this pretty pussy is mine.”
My eyes drifted closed as I tried to hold onto the sheer pleasure of having him touching me like that. “It’s yours,” I breathed. “All yours, Liam.”
He kissed my neck, his teeth sinking into the tender flesh where my shoulder and neck met. “I want to be yours, little Brie.”
Tears burned my eyes even as pleasure curled in my chest. I wanted that too. “Y-you do?”
“Yes. I’ve wanted it for so fucking long.” He buried his face in my neck so I couldn’t see him. “I wanted it when I came to New York last month. I thought I was never going to get you alone at that stupid party I threw at Axton’s. Then I did and got so carried away that we ended up fucking each other’s brains out and didn’t get a chance to talk afterward. You left and I had to go back to Tennessee to help Rissa.”
“You could have called me,” I murmured.
“No, babe. I couldn’t. I don’t do that kind of shit. I don’t even call my sister. I can barely stand to text.” He brushed his lips over the shell of my ear, his heavy breath making goose bumps pop up over my entire body. My thighs opened even more for him, but he didn’t do anything but kiss my neck again, even though I could feel how much he wanted me. He was holding himself back, as if he needed to talk this out before he could sink into my willing body again.
“I’m not a hearts-and-flowers kind of man, Brie. Romance isn’t my thing. It never has been. I’m not ever going to be the guy you deserve because I’m a selfish bastard. But I want you so fucking much that I’m going to be even more selfish and ask you to be mine knowing that I can’t give you those things.” He skimmed his nose over the base of my throat and kissed across my collarbone. “Can I be yours, little Brie?”
He lifted his head and I shut my eyes quickly before he could read the emotion churning in them. If he’d seen my eyes right then he would have known that it didn’t matter that he was a selfish bastard. I’d always known that and it hadn’t stopped me from loving him. I’d fallen for this rocker knowing that he wasn’t perfect, knowing that he came with a lot more heartache than most women could handle.
Good thing I wasn’t most women.
I wanted him the way he was. Loved him the way he was. I didn’t want to change him.
I only needed him.
“Yes,” I whispered and felt him shudder against me.
Liam buried his face in my chest and stayed there for a long moment. When he finally lifted his head, his eyes were clearer than I’d ever seen them. He smiled and butterflies actually fluttered in my belly. “Thank fuck.”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Gabriella
FOUR YEARS EARLIER
“Brie!”
I finished tightening the strap on my heel and straightened as the door to my bedroom opened. I slowly turned to find Liam standing in the doorway, trying to get his tie sorted. He had it in a knot, but it was definitely not the right kind of knot.
Laughing, I stepped forward and grasped the ends of the silky dark-red tie that matched my dress. “How did you do this?” I asked as I used my long nails to try to undo the knot he’d tightened in the material.
His eyes weren’t on the tie, however, but on the cleavage that my dress was showing off. I lifted one hand and tapped him teasingly on the jaw, trying to get his attention off my breasts for the moment. He lifted his hungry gaze and I knew if I didn’t distract him we weren’t going to be leaving the apartment that night.
If tonight were anything but the biggest event in the music world, I would have taken him up on the unspoken promise in his blue eyes. Unfortunately for both our aching bodies, it was and we had to be there.
The song I’d collaborated with OtherWorld on, “Shatter Me”, was being recognized and we were all receiving a special award for it at the Grammys. When I’d written that song, I’d only been thinking of the pain Alexis was going through at the time. I never expected it to become a kind of anthem for teens fighting depression, but more specifically the ones who had been self-harming. Over the last two years, my song had become part of support groups and recovery programs. Tonight, the fans and several national teen mental health organizations were handing over an honorary Grammy because of it.
For me, it was going to be my first Grammy; for OtherWorld, that was an entirely different story. They had been in this business for a hell of a lot longer than I had and had several to their name. This year they weren’t up for any nominations but Demon’s Wings was so we would have to see them there as well, but I wasn’t going to let that bother me tonight.
I’d spent the entire day getting ready. I had on a dress that had been made specifically for tonight by an up-and-coming Italian designer that my aunt had recently taken on as a client. My stylist had spent hours working on my hair, makeup, and nails before leaving half an hour ago. So, no matter how much I wanted to take Liam up on his offer, there was no way I was going to let him muss me up.
“You look beautiful,” he muttered as I finally worked the knot open and began to fix the disaster he’d made of the expensive tie. “How the fuck did I get so lucky?”
I bit the inside of my cheek and concentrated on the task at hand as butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I’d been asking myself the same thing for the last four months. How was it possible that I had this man—the man who I’d always dreamed of being mine—in my bed every
night?
Liam might have said he wasn’t going to label what we had as that of a boyfriend/girlfriend nature, but that was exactly what it was. No, I thought as I finished up the perfect knot and tightened it at his throat. It was more than that. Much more.
We were practically living together now. No matter where I was, he was always there too. He rarely went home to Tennessee and the few times he had, he’d asked me to go with him. The closet in my New York apartment was half full of his things, just as my West Hollywood apartment was. We’d never really talked about his moving in, it had just kind of happened.
With his tie finally in place, I kissed his lips, for once not having to stand on my tiptoes to do it with the heels I was wearing. I wanted to linger, deepen the kiss, but knew that I was tempting my beast with just the soft brush of my lips over his. Stepping back, I gave him a sassy smile and turned back to the bed for my purse.
Behind me I heard him muttering one vicious curse after another under his breath and I grinned. Facing him once more, I gave him a wink as I walked around him toward the door. “Let’s go or we’ll be late.”
“I don’t want to go,” he grumbled as he followed me out of the apartment and into the elevator.
“It’s going to be fun,” I assured him. “Plus, this is for me as much as you and OtherWorld. Can’t you grin and bear it for a little while? For me?” I gave him a small pout.
Large hands grasped my waist and pulled me against his lean body. I felt his lips against my hair as he blew out a long breath. “Yeah, I guess I can for you.” He didn’t sound happy about it, but that he was going to put up with what went with tonight—for me—had my heart melting just a little bit more for him.
I curled myself against him, hiding my smile as we rode the elevator down to the first floor. He might seem all moody, badass rocker on the outside, but I knew that he was all soft and cuddly on the inside. At least with the ones he cared about. I was beyond thrilled that I was included in that small number of people.