From Darkness (Hearts & Arrows Book 3)

  Elaine yelled over her shoulder. “Sarah!”

  Sarah stuck her head out of the office in the back. “What?”

  “Did you send Jon Landreaux after Renata?”

  Sarah walked out with her brows drawn. “Well, yeah. The spot was empty.”

  “Was not.”

  “Was too.”

  “Look here.” Elaine turned the monitor back again, and Sarah looked over her shoulder. Elaine sniffed. “What is that perfume you’ve got on today? It smells like roses or something. It’s been giving me a headache all morning.”

  “Huh? I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Sarah shook her head and put a hand on her hip, pointing the other at the computer screen. “I swear to God, that spot was empty, Elaine. Like I would ever delete a name in the spreadsheet.”

  Elaine gave Sarah a look and turned back to Josie. “I’m so sorry. Let me go ahead and cut your check. Did he leave you to it?”

  “No, he almost got shot.”

  Sarah’s mouth made an O.

  Josie snorted a laugh. “Don’t look so concerned. It was actually pretty amusing.”

  Sarah relaxed and smiled. “Well, at least it was entertaining. Renata is always packing, but she can’t shoot for shit.”

  “Lucky for Jon. That big-ass gun would have blown a hole in him the size of a grapefruit.” Josie watched Elaine write the check. “Just give me half. Make sure Jon gets the other half, okay?”

  “You got it, Josie. I’ll cut you a little extra for the trouble. I don’t know how that happened, but I swear it’ll be the last time.”

  Elaine pushed the check across the surface, and Josie folded it up and slipped it into her back pocket.

  “Thanks.”

  She pushed the door open with her back and stepped out into a patch of sunlight, feeling it warm on her face, a promise of spring. The fog seemed to be lifting.

  Everywhere, except in her heart.

  Jon sat on the floor in the middle of his room that afternoon, surrounded by blown-up photos of Josie’s crime wall. He’d come home after Renata with Josie on his mind and heart and soul.

  That moment when he’d leaned into her car, she’d looked up at him, and he could have sworn for a split second she was waiting for a kiss. But the second he’d seen the light in her ignite, she’d snuffed it, and just like that, the moment had been over. He wished he’d just done it. Just slipped his hand into the crook of her neck and kissed those lips he’d been dreaming about for so long.

  He wondered what she would have done. Would she have pushed him away or pulled him closer?

  Because she could say she hated him until the end of time, but he knew it was a lie.

  He laid another photo down, assembling the replica sheet by sheet—the first step to getting it on his own wall so he could look at it all together. Jon picked one up and inspected it, making out the title of an article and the majority of the text, though a portion of it was hidden under another sheet.

  It was then that he realized just how much ground he had to make up. And even then, he still didn’t have all the cards.

  His door flew open, and Lola ran in. “Daddy-daddy-daddy-daddy!”

  He held out his hands to stop her. “No-no-no-no-no! Wait!”

  It was too late.

  She ran across all the sheets, scattering them before slamming into his chest. And he couldn’t be mad in the slightest, not when she wrapped her little arms around his neck.

  “I’m goin’ ni-night.”

  He hugged her just as Tori made it to the threshold, looking apologetic.

  “Looks like you’re goin’ crazy,” he said.

  “I’m not crazy, Daddy. I’m Lola.”

  “My mistake.” He kissed her hair. “I love you, baby.”

  “Love you.”

  “I’m so sorry,” Tori said. “She totally got away from me.”

  He sighed and ran his hands through his hair, twisting it into a small ponytail. “It’s all right. Just trying to get them laid out before I put them on the wall.”

  Lola hopped over to Tori, who smoothed the little girl’s curly dark hair.

  “It’s nap time, monster. Go get in bed. I’ll be right there.”

  She squealed and ran down the hallway.

  “How’s it going?” Tori made her way over and knelt down to look at the big photos while Jon tried to put them back where they’d been before Babyzilla blew in.

  “Slow. There’s so much here.” He looked over the dozens of photos that lay around him on the floor. “She’s been busy.”

  “What’s your plan?”

  “Right now? I’ve got to get this mess put together. Then, I’ve gotta start digging up the old articles and logging them, and then…I don’t know. I’ll probably do a lot of mad-dogging.”

  “Stare the clues out?”

  He shrugged. “It works. Things usually fall into place.”

  Tori looked over the photos, pausing to touch a picture of a girl wrapped in plastic. “I don’t envy your job.”

  “Yeah, well, being an accountant isn’t exactly my cup of tea either.”

  “Don’t be jealous because I’m good at math.”

  “Oh, I’m not.” He ran a hand over his mouth. “Yep. It’s gonna be a long couple of days. Sure you don’t want to help?”

  “I don’t have the stomach for crime photos. You’re on your own, son.” She gave him a slap on the shoulder and stood. “Need anything?”

  “An extra set of hands and a few more hours in the day couldn’t hurt.”

  “I’ll see what I can do.”

  She laughed as she closed his door, leaving him with his thoughts, leaving him in silence.

  So he turned on Willie Nelson, who sang about the girl who was always on his mind, and Jon got to work, comforted in the fact that, if nothing else, Willie knew how he felt.

  The fog hung heavy outside Dita’s windows that afternoon, gray and dense. She watched it slowly roll by from where she lay molded into her mattress, nestled in her bedding.

  She had stayed with Heff all night, too afraid to be alone. He’d brought her tea and a ham sandwich, which she’d inhaled, and they’d talked until the sun was up. She’d told him about her horrible dreams, and they’d talked about Adonis and Ares. Or she’d talked, and he’d listened and nodded, occasionally offering his thoughts. He hadn’t been happy that she’d held out on coming to him and had made her promise not to hesitate again.

  They’d also talked about Perry.

  As much as it had hurt for her to destroy the mirror and as much as everything Perry had said cut through her, Perry was right, and Dita needed to tell her so. It wasn’t an easy realization, but she’d come to the understanding all the same, thanks to Heff’s words and his warmth and his honesty.

  She’d stayed up talking with him until he’d yawned so hard, his eyes watered. And then she’d said goodbye, slipping into her bed for a few hours, though sleep never found her. Instead, she’d listed all the things she needed to say to her friend.

  Dita glanced over her shoulder to look at her clock, deciding it was time. She peeled herself out of bed, shuffled to the elevator, and pushed B4.

  The doors opened up to the black marble hallway of the underworld, and she stepped out just as Perry appeared at the other end of the foyer.

  “Hey,” Dita said lamely, her voice echoing against the polished stone.

  Perry’s hazel eyes softened, and she gave Dita a small smile. “Hey. Come on in.”

  Dita made her way through the foyer, her eyes lingering on the painting of Elysium. Adonis was somewhere in there. Desperation slipped over her as she scanned the painting for him. But she caught herself, biting her lip as she walked past, hugging the far wall to put as much distance as she could between her and the painting.

  “Perry,” Dita said as she approached, “I…”

  She found that she had no words, no way to explain, except for one.

  “I’m sorry.” The words were rough; they burned her
throat and stung her eyes.

  Perry stepped toward her, reaching for her. “No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have destroyed the mirror, not like that. It was cruel. I should have let you have a say, but Dita…” Perry shook her head, her eyes big and sad. “You should have seen yourself. I was afraid for you, but that’s no excuse.”

  “I shouldn’t have said what I said about you not caring, and I shouldn’t have lied to you about the mirror. I shouldn’t have hidden, but I knew it was wrong. I knew you’d tell me to stop, that you’d take it away, and I couldn’t…I didn’t…”

  “Stop. It’s okay. You weren’t the only one who said things they need to apologize for. I was rash, and you were hysterical. I should have waited until you calmed down to talk about it, but I was so fucking upset. You would have been shocked at your behavior, if you’d realized what you were doing, and honestly, I just couldn’t find enough patience to let that version of you go on a second longer.”

  “I know. But I’m not gonna lie and say I’m okay.”

  “Honey, I’m sorry.” Perry wrapped her arms around Dita.

  She sighed, hooking her chin on Perry’s shoulder. “It’s okay. I know getting rid of it was the right thing to do.”

  Perry pulled away and gave her a once-over. “You really do look terrible.”

  Dita snorted a laugh. “Thanks.”

  “I mean it. And you smell like you got hit by a bus full of Gouda cheese and gym socks.”

  “Pretty sure Cockston Von Schmegma was driving.” Dita took a deep breath. “He cornered me last night.”

  “What?” Perry gasped, more than a little uneasy. “Come here and sit.”

  Once they were seated in the living room, Perry turned to her, face tight. “What did Ares say?”

  “I don’t know anyone by that name. I do, however, know a Weiner Von Dicktrap.”

  Perry’s face relaxed into a smile. “So, what did Dingus Frittercock want?”

  Dita rubbed her eyes and fought to keep them open, resting her head against the back of the couch. “He wanted to talk.”

  “He is such a dumb shit.”

  “He wants what he wants, and he won’t take no for an answer. In fact, I’m pretty sure that he invented the phrase no means yes.”

  Perry chuckled, but the sound wasn’t all that amused.

  “He just…I don’t know. I was starving and he walked into the kitchen and I freaked out.”

  “Why didn’t you come to me?”

  Dita shrugged. “We’d just been in a huge fight.”

  “I know, but you know that wouldn’t have mattered,” she chided.

  “Still, I couldn’t bring myself to bother you. I somehow ended up in Heff’s apartment.”

  “Like, not on purpose?”

  “No, not on purpose, but I’m glad my brain took me there even if it wasn’t communicating with the rest of me.”

  “I’m glad too. And I’m glad you came to talk to me today.”

  “Same. Plus, it’s one less thing to worry about, which is nice since I haven’t slept in days, I was cornered by my ex who tried to kill me, and I’m basically out of the loop on the competition. My brain is functioning at, like, ten percent power. Although I did get Jon and Josie within a few feet of each other today.”

  “I saw that. It was almost a lucky break. I hate to say you’re off your game, but you’re off your game. Using the same trick twice in one competition?” Perry jokingly tsked and folded her arms. “You’re better than that, Dita.”

  “I’m lucky to even be functioning at this point, so can I get a pass?”

  “I guess—this time.” Perry sat back. “I saw Jon and Josie’s fight last night too.”

  “Don’t remind me,” Dita groaned. “At least he has some info on Rhodes now even though he committed a felony to get it.”

  “He was awfully charming this morning. I thought he was going to kiss her for a second.”

  Dita propped her feet on the coffee table. “Yeah, I don’t know how Josie would have taken that.”

  “Yeah, me neither. Has Artemis even made any plays in the game?”

  “Nothing I’ve seen. She’s still ahead at this point. Jon breaking into her house crossed the line. Josie was already annoyed with him, but that was beyond. It’s going to take her a minute to get over that.”

  “Who knows? Maybe he’ll figure something out. You could always give Jon a clue.”

  Dita sighed. “I don’t know what though. I’m too tired to think, let alone compose a master plan.”

  Perry looked her over. “I’m worried about you.”

  Dita rolled her head to look at Perry. “Aw, I’m touched, friend. I love you, too.”

  “Don’t joke. I’m serious.”

  “I know,” Dita said as she looked away again. “I’m worried about me, too. I’ve got to get some real sleep, just a couple of measly REM cycles instead of just dozing off. Every time I close my eyes, the nightmares come, and I wake up feeling worse than I did before. If things don’t change, I’m going to lose, which means Jon and Josie will lose.”

  “We’ll figure something out.” Perry pulled a black cashmere throw off the back of the couch and laid it on her legs. “Tell me about some of your dreams.”

  Dita shifted, bringing her knees up as she turned to face Perry, the leather squeaking when she hugged her calves. “In one, I’m with Adonis. We’re in Elysium, and I say something that makes him laugh, but then he can’t stop laughing, just laughs until he’s hysterical. And then…he starts to scream, falling to his knees as snakes crawl out of his mouth and eyes.” She shuddered and squeezed her legs tighter.

  “In another, Ares and I are in old Greece. He kisses me, tender at first, but when I open my eyes, he’s in wrath, his eyes red, his hands around my neck. I can always feel his fingers when I wake. I can feel the bones in my throat like they’re being crushed, and I can’t breathe.” She blinked back her tears. “I don’t know what to do, Perry. I don’t know how to move forward.”

  Perry bit her lip.

  “What?”

  “You don’t want to hear it.”

  “Are you kidding me? I can barely see straight, I’m so exhausted. I’m sure I’ll hate it, but lay it on me. I’m desperate.”

  Perry looked at her for a minute before answering, “You’ve got to talk to Ares.”

  “You were right.” Dita groaned and picked up a pillow, pressing it to her face to yell, “Do not want,” into it.

  “I know, but think about it. You think you know how you feel, but there’s so much more to it. You need some sort of closure, and sitting here, avoiding it, isn’t doing you any favors. This is not the way you work. You care about Ares whether you want to or not, and you always will. So, you’ve got to find a way to come to terms with that and let it go. You have to figure out how to handle the fact that he will always be in your life. You can’t run away or hide from him. You have to face him.”

  She dropped the pillow to her lap with a huff. “Why are you so smart? I hate you.”

  “You love me, and I’m right.”

  “No,” Dita said as she sank deeper into the cushions, “I’m pretty sure I hate you.”

  Perry leaned on the back of the couch and propped her head on her hand. “While you’re feeling introspective, can we finally talk about Adonis?”

  Dita flinched. “I don’t know.”

  “We don’t have to play Dr. Persephone if you don’t want to. It’s okay.”

  “No, it’s all right.” A heavy sigh left her before she took a moment to think about him, really think about him. “I miss him,” she finally said.

  “I know,” Perry said softly.

  “I’ve been so lonely. He was always there, every day for thousands of years, and I told him everything, shared everything with him. I spent almost as much time in Elysium as I did living my life here. He’s just…he was always there, and now, he’s gone.” She took a breath to steady herself. “He’s gone, and I can’t change that. There’s nothing I ca
n do but mourn.”

  “How do you feel about how he left you?”

  “I don’t know.” Dita looked up at the ceiling, trying to stave off her tears. “Responsible. The whole thing was my fault. It’s like I killed him a second time.”

  “I know it feels that way, Dita, but he chose to drink Lethe.”

  “Because I left him.”

  “Listen, I love him too. He was the closest thing to a son that I’d ever had. I raised him from a baby, tucked him in at night, and watched him grow, but he was spoiled and selfish. Maybe that was my fault.”

  “He wasn’t easy to tell no.”

  “No, he wasn’t. And if he hadn’t been so…well, Adonis, you wouldn’t have left him. He’s just as much to blame as you.”

  “It doesn’t feel like that,” Dita said.

  “But you get me?”

  “I get you.”

  Perry nodded. “So that leaves Ares.”

  Dita glanced at her. “I’m sorry, who?”

  She thought for a second. “Taintston McPubus.”

  Dita looked back up at the ceiling crisscrossed with black beams. “I mean, what the fuck, Perry? I can’t even be in the same room as him without almost having a heart attack.”

  “What are you afraid of?”

  Dita frowned. “Besides the obvious physical threat?”

  “Do you really think he’s going to hurt you again?”

  Dita traced the beams with her eyes from wall to wall. “I don’t know.”

  “Well, I’ll tell you that I don’t think he will.” Perry was matter-of-fact, and Dita found a small bit of comfort in her certainty. “Zeus will bury him. Literally. In Tartarus. You know Zeus doesn’t make idle threats.”

  “That makes perfect logical sense, but it doesn’t stop me from being afraid.”

  “I know. Just remind yourself that he’s not an idiot.”

  “Ha.”

  “I mean, he’s an idiot, but he doesn’t have a death wish.” She paused, watching Dita, who didn’t want to make eye contact. “What do you think he could possibly say to you?” Perry asked. “What could he say to change your mind?”