The Way We Roll

  “Sharon, hasn’t been messing with you, has she?” he asked.

  “Actually, since school started I haven’t seen her. Hayden,the chapter president, has been real cool. My mom certainly wants me to do it, but I don’t know if it will be the right thing for me. I can do without this entire headache.I don’t really have a feeling either way of which way to go.”

  He urged, “So go to the rush. You won’t know what’s for you unless you try.”

  “You think?”

  “Yes, and if them girls get on your nerves, just leave and think of me. We can start our own greek organizationand call it Me Phi You.”

  “You are so silly,” I told him, really appreciating that he knew how to make me laugh.

  Kade was right on: I wouldn’t really know unless I went. As my cheerleader, he made me give him my word I’d try.

  Nine nineteen PM appeared on the clock. I was outside the room where the Betas were preparing the rush. I’d been there for twenty minutes. It was supposed to have started at nine on the dot. So much for that.

  “No, they’re not on CP Time,” mumbled this dark girl with a midlength bob cut and a slamming body.

  “I know that’s right,” I said, not knowing if she even wanted me to hear her thoughts.

  Next to the girl with the bob, another cute brown-skinnedgirl, about five-six and sporting a fly short do, said, “Hi, I’m Torian Palmer. This is my roommate, Loni Bolds. I see everyone else huddled around in groups, so they probably know each other. I really want to be a Beta. What about you?” she said, extending her hand.

  “I’m Malloy Murray, and if they don’t start soon, I’m leaving,” I said, clearly making it known that I did not need this.

  Loni said, “Exactly, Malloy. I’m not waiting all night either.”

  Torian said, “Wait—Murray, like in the National President’slast name. You’re the girl everyone has been talkingabout? You’re her daughter? I didn’t see you last year, so I didn’t know what you looked like.”

  I felt awkward. I didn’t want fake friends. However, as we waited for the Betas, I kept chatting with the two girls. They seemed real cool. They were both business majors like me. We were all sophomores, and as we looked around, we noticed that most of the girls were juniors who hadn’t made the line last year. Everyone looked nervous. And, like Torian, if the doors didn’t open till next week, they weren’t moving.

  “These girls are like zombies,” Loni uttered, completely taking the words from my brain as she discreetly pointed to the group nearby. “My old roommate and her crew, they’re all juniors. You can see how desperate they are to make it.”

  “Why aren’t you with them?” I asked.

  “They’ve been doing underground stuff with the Betas for a month now, and they just know I ain’t gonna make line now, because I refuse to let them whip my butt.”

  “Well, let’s not say what we won’t do,” Torian said.

  “Please, I think they’re crazy to let someone hit ’em. No one is putting any marks on me,” I told the two of them emphatically.

  Hayden opened the doors thirty-five minutes late and said, “Thanks for your patience. We had to wait on our adviser before we could begin.”

  Another Beta peered from behind her and said, “I’m Bea, the Vice President, and I see some girls want to be Betas bad. Come on in. Welcome to our rush.”

  At that moment I wanted to turn and walk away. I didn’t want to get lumped with overzealous girls badly needing Greek letters to define them. I was a confident somebody. I might not be the nicest, but I was secure. However, Loni and Torian had sandwiched me between them. They wanted me going nowhere but into the room. Their warm smiles were comforting. Not backing out, I walked with them.

  It turned out to be an enjoyable night, probably becausea lot of ladies from the alumni chapter and Sharon were absent, for whatever reason. Though I had grown up with the organization plastered everywhere in my house, seeing my mother on a video as the National Presidenttalk about the joy of the sorority moved me. She describedhow the sisterhood brought out her love for others. And then when she went on to say how proud she was of their impact on the community and why she wanted us to think about being a Beta to do even more good for the world, that was even more impactful.

  I couldn’t say I was 100 percent ready to go for it, but I was certainly leaning that way. When the rush was over, Torian and Loni and I exchanged numbers. Maybe the whole pledge process wasn’t going to be as bad as I thought. Yeah, I was starting to feel it.

  “This is an excellent package. You’re going to make line, I just know it,” my mom said at the University of Southeastern Arkansas football game against a big rival. “You’ve got all the necessary items required in here. And your application is really stellar.”

  We were supposed to be watching my brother play, but she had her head plunged into my rush packet. I was sort of mad at her for not enjoying the moment. I wanted to watch the game like all the other spectators. She kept interruptingme every five minutes about why I wrote this or that. Then it dawned on me, as I watched my dad in the row in front of us laugh and be all into this lady ten years younger than him, that my mom needed a distraction.I wouldn’t say my mom still loved my dad, but I knew somewhere deep inside she still had some feelings for him. I had been in high school when they broke up. I still didn’t know the details of why they split.

  I did remember my mom saying her life had been like one of the characters from the movie, Waiting to Exhale. She felt she’d helped my dad soar and become a successfulexecutive. And as soon as it happened, her version was that he dumped her for a white lady. Except, my dad never tried to marry the lady, he just moved out with my brother and was able to dip out and have fun whenever he wanted without my mom nagging him. But now that he had gotten the blondes out of his system, it seemed he was into this young girl. For the first time in a long time I understood why my mom clinged so heavily to the sorority. She was able to receive from her sisters the fulfillment, joy, passion, and love she looked for and expected in a marriage. Plus, she was retired, and the organization gave her much to do.

  “You think it’s good, Mom?” I said, rubbing her back as I felt her pain.

  She smiled. “This is excellent!”

  Arkansas was up 14–0, when the defense came out. I started cheering.

  “Somebody is really excited, and your brother is on the sidelines. This boy, Kade, from the convention has your attention,huh? Just don’t get too caught up,” she said, obviouslytelling from the expression on my face that I had a big thing for Kade.

  She cared about my feelings, and she didn’t want me to get hurt. Though I knew this was always how she felt about me, it was nice to hear her say it.

  Later in the game, I was texting Loni and Torian back and forth, trying to convince them to come up to Arkansas for the party. My mom was pleased that I was trying to pledge her sorority and making friends who were trying to do the same, so she told me to invite them to the nationalheadquarters office soon. I wasn’t sure I’d do that, but she was so insistent, I told her I’d ask them.

  Life wasn’t bad. After being in school for six weeks, I still had all As. Regardless of what happened with the Betas, I was developing friendships. And my man was on the attack, sacking the quarterback play after play, comingoff the defensive end.

  Then, on the next play, when Kade took somebody down, Kade didn’t get up. Most of the game, I had been playing it cool, keeping my excitement for my guy under wraps from fans. But at that moment, I screamed.

  I didn’t even know my dad had known we were dating, but he turned around and said, “It’s Kade, huh?”

  “I need to go down to the field.”

  “We can go to the locker room. I’ve got a parent pass,” he said as I stood and walked with him to the tunnel.

  “Dad, I didn’t know you knew we were dating?”

  “Yeah, I hang out with Mikey and Kade all the time. Lately the boy has been just extra clingy and overly nice to m
e. Then he started talking about my daughter. I wonderedwhat was going on with you two, and Mikey confirmedit. Next time I saw that joker, I told Kade I’d kill him if he didn’t do right by you. He assured me he had the best intentions. The boy really does care. He’s trying to get an internship this summer if this football thing doesn’t work out. He really does have potential.”

  I just hugged my father and whispered, “Now stop messingwith my babysitters.”

  “Staying young, that’s all. No harm done.”

  In the locker room, he went over to the side and said a few things to the trainer. The next thing I knew, we were ushered to stand next to a lady. My dad knew her.

  “Oh, Mr. Murray, thank you for coming down to see Kade. Goodness gracious, my son, my son. I don’t know what I’m gonna do.”

  It was his mom. My heart was tearing, but hers was clearly broken. She threw her large hands up in the air and started talking about everything in the world so she wouldn’t concentrate on what was bothering her most.

  “Who in the world does this little girl think she is comingback here to check up on her investment? I am sick of these hot-tailed girls wanting to see my son play at any cost,” she said to my dad as she turned her nose up at me.

  Maybe I’d be territorial, too, if my boy was projected to make a ton of dough. Instinct kicked in, and I stepped back. I didn’t want to disturb her.

  My dad looked back and saw she was talking about me. “Uh, no, this is my daughter.”

  Like a microwave gets hot in seconds, she quickly warmed up to me. “Wow, you’re Mikey’s sister?”

  I didn’t get to respond. Kade was abruptly rolled inside, and his mom rightfully left me and my dad to go over to him. “You are not going back out there. I don’t care what you say. This is crazy,” she said to Kade.

  I was so nervous, not knowing what was up. A few minutes later one of the trainers came to me and asked me to follow them to see Kade. I hadn’t been a daddy’s girl in a while. Now I was clinging to his arm.

  “Dad, he’s with his mom. I’m just down to make sure he’s going to be all right. I don’t want to intrude.”

  The trainer heard me and said, “No, it’s okay, he wants to see you.”

  My dad pushed me toward the guy. A part of me didn’t want to see Kade hurt at all. I needed to be strong for him. I couldn’t be vulnerable.

  “Hey, baby,” Kade said as he extended his hand. “No long face. They say it’s just sprained and that I can go back out there. I see you met my mom.”

  “I just thought you were Mikey’s sister and came down with your dad,” his mom said in a mean tone. “Is there something else going on I don’t know about? Maybe I didn’t have her pegged wrong after all.”

  “Ma, leave her alone, she’s my girl.”

  “What? You telling me someone is your girl?” She turned to me. “Okay, then, talk some sense into this fool and tell him not to go back out there on that field.”

  He made the argument. “NFL pro scouts are here.”

  “So?” I said to him.

  “Malloy, they came to see me play, and I’m trying to keep my stock up so I can go in the first round.”

  “You’ve already had two fumbles, and three sacks. If you didn’t impress them today, I need to take their job. You don’t need to go back in the game. Let your leg get stronger, and next week you can go back out there. If you go out now you might damage it and be out a few more games. You don’t want that now, do you? Come on now.”

  “All right!” he huffed. “Wrap me up. I’m just going to sit on the sidelines. I’ll see you after the game.”

  The trainer wheeled him back into the isolated part of the locker room. I walked out to my dad. His mom followedme.

  “You really care for my son, and you’ve got influence over him. Take care of him. He’s a hothead, but if he can appreciate someone with your qualities, maybe my boy is growing up. All right, Big Mike, take care, now.”

  “You impressed the mom. Dang!” my dad teased. “I taught you well.”

  “Keep being a good influence and lose the young girl,” I said as I hit him in the arm.

  “Stay out of your daddy’s business,” he joked. “Ain’t nothing that serious. Just messing with your mama.”

  “Okay, so maybe you coming to this party is not a great idea,” I said as I saw my boyfriend hopping toward me at the big afterparty the team was throwing later that night.

  “Please, we beat them Eagles real bad! Your brother got an interception. I’ve got to be here for him anyway, and then maybe you and I can have some alone time. I don’t have a curfew, but I have to be with the trainer early in the morning.”

  Worried, I said, “You don’t need to be on your feet that long.”

  “Come here, girl,” he said as he threw his arm around me and drew me to him.

  If eyes could cut, I would have had so many stabs up and down my back. Most of the women in the place were checking us out, and, yes, when I first met Kade, I, too, had been physically attracted him. But getting to know him like I had over the last month—he was so deep. His kind of commitment would scare most of these women away. I knew why Sharon wasn’t trying to give up that kind of affection.

  Being naughty, Kade whispered, “You know I ain’t had none in a month?”

  “Well, we’ve been talking for thirty-two days. Is there something you need to be telling me?”

  “You know I can’t count good. My head is still messed up from the game.”

  “You play defense. You hit people. Nobody hits you.”

  “Come on, I’m on crutches. Somebody hit me.”

  I lightly jabbed him. “All right. Quick on your feet, too!”

  “Let’s go sit down,” he said as he grabbed my waist.

  “There’s nowhere to sit.”

  “I’m going to go find us some chairs. You just stay right here.”

  Before I could tell him I’d go, I was distracted. My phone started buzzing. I looked down and saw I had a text messagefrom Loni that said she and Torian were at the door. My brother was working the door, so I asked, “Can they get in free, please?”

  “They your friends? You ain’t got no friends,” Mikey joked as I popped him. “If y’all can put up with my mean sister, come on in. I’m Mikey.”

  I bragged, “He’s the guy who got the interception today, y’all.”

  “So you find time to notice my game, too.”

  “Oh, see, you got jokes.” I turned to Torian and Loni. “Come on, girls. I want you to meet my boo.” Then I turned and saw Sharon was rubbing all over Kade’s chest. “Oh, no! This hussy is not up in here trying to get with my man.”

  “Okay, so who’s your man?” Loni asked.

  “Yeah, which one is he?” Torian repeated.

  I pointed to Kade. Torian and Loni saw all the Betas around him. They tugged me back from walking over.

  Torian said, “You can’t date one of the Beta guys. That’s pledging suicide. Uh-uh!”

  The music got lower, and Kade and Sharon’s voices escalated.He was stepping back from her. She was ticked. I didn’t feel threatened. I knew he didn’t want her.

  “Clearly what they had is over,” I said boldly to my friends.

  “Sharon, move back now. I said we’re over. I’m not trying to be mean. Plus, I’m hurt. I can’t have you tugging on me.”

  “But I need to talk to you Kade; this is serious.”

  “Ain’t nothing left to say.”

  He looked over and saw me watching. I couldn’t believeit when he hobbled over, bent his neck down, and planted his lips on mine. People in the room started clappingand cheering. Sharon and a few of the Betas from Western Smith fled the party.

  “Stop, stop, you can’t do this,” I said

  “I just want you to know, Malloy, that Sharon and I are over for real. I don’t want nobody making you feel like that ain’t clear.” He started moaning, and I knew his ankle was hurting him.

  “Let me go get my car so I can take you
home.”

  In a sexy voice he said, “Oh, I like the sound of that.”

  “Guys, I’ve got to leave,” I said to Torian and Loni.

  Loni looked around and saw the crowd getting loud again. “We’re going to leave, too.”

  “Y’all don’t like the party?”

  “No, it’s just that we got some crazy looks from the Betas, and we aren’t even supposed to be out like this,” Loni said. “You know, when you want to pledge, sisters don’t want you out.”

  “Y’all gonna let them dictate your life? You’ve got to have some fun.”

  “No, we’ll go,” Torian said as they walked out with me.

  When we got to my car, I yelled. “Oh, my gosh!”

  My back window had been smashed in. There was a brick with a note stuck to it written in brown lipstick that read Don’t be such a slut! I was livid. “That chick is crazy!” I yelled. “I cannot believe this!”

  “Calm down!” Torian said. “You don’t know who did this.”

  “Are you kidding me? I know exactly who did this. It was Sharon.”

  6

  PRINCIPLE

  I just stared at the note as tears of anger streamed down my face. The party that was once inside was, I guess, now over because everyone had piled around me. I heard some folks laughing, and when I looked up it was the Betas from my school.

  “Who would do this?” someone screamed out from behind me.

  “Did you leave a purse or anything out?” Loni said.

  “I know who did this. I think it’s mighty trifling that the trick can’t come up in my face and handle this woman to woman!” I yelled out as I looked across the parking lot straight into the eyes of Sharon. “I’m going right over there to talk to her.”

  “Oh, no, you are not. You’re not going anywhere,” Torian said, holding me back. “Loni, help me.”

  Loni chimed in. “Yeah, she’s right. You’ll be committingsuicide if you go over there.”

  “Listen to you guys. What kind of frame of mind are you in? Will you do anything to pledge and get stupid Greek letters?” I was so angry, looking at the shattered glass. “A brick was just thrown through my car window by one of them girls because now her guy is with me. I tried to let him go. I tried to give him back to her. It’s not my fault he didn’t want her. If this is the dumb stuff she does, no wonder Kade wanted to end it. She’s older than me and still acting like a child.”