The Life of a Celebrated Buccaneer

  CHAPTER III.

  The days of mourning were barely over when difficulties arose. The faithleft behind by the old saint was extremely good, and even beautiful, butit was not at all adapted to one who occasionally robbed a neighbour'shen-roost. Indeed, it was not at all fitted for one who followed theprofession of a bold Buccaneer. It was a trifle hard to sell all that hehad and give it to the poor, who might be a lazy lot of skulkingrascals. Then who could expect to get on in this world, if, when onecheek was struck he turned the other? Beautiful, yes, but not practical.If our fighting Buccaneer did this sort of thing, every daw from themainland would invade the nest of the eagle, and peck him to death, andsuck his eggs.

  Then the command not to lay up riches upon earth; and to live in peaceand charity with all men. This was all very well, but then when you aresurrounded by a lot of people, who will not live up to these finesentiments, what is a poor fellow to do?

  The Buccaneer had a coxswain, who was his right-hand man, and whose namewas Jack Commonsense. He took him into his confidence. Old Jackscratched his head, which was a sure sign that he was in trouble, and hetold his master that he did not see any way out of the difficulty, for,if they sailed by the instruction as laid down in the Book the saint hadleft behind, they had better give up the buccaneering business at once,and try something else. The end of the matter was, that it was handedover to the Buccaneer's Church to settle, for, as he said in his quaintsea-faring language, it's no use keeping a dog if you have to barkyourself. To his clergy he deputed the by no means easy task of shapinga course in accordance with his book, the Bible, and at the same timenot altogether antagonistic to his worldly interests. In fact, some kindof a compromise had to be made.

  Obedient to the command of their earthly master, the most learned of theBuccaneer's divines assembled together in solemn conclave, and havingopened the proceedings with prayer, they fell to arguing upon the gravequestions before them. The Scriptures were searched, and very muchlearning and piety were displayed, and very much heat, with a littletemper, was introduced; but there seemed to be little probability oftheir coming to a satisfactory conclusion. Some said the word must beadhered to, others said that the word killed, and that it was the spiritthat must be taken into consideration.

  After very much argument, which at times cleft asunder the matter indispute, thereby forming schism and even sects, a satisfactoryconclusion was arrived at, and the foundation was laid of an edifice,which in time was to grow into most beautiful proportions. Thefoundation rested upon the Book, and the corner stones were those whichChrist had laid in Galilee. The superstructure was built to a largeextent by human hands, and of earthly material. Still it was a nobleedifice, and thus the Buccaneer had manufactured for him a good everydayreligion, somewhat worldly perhaps, but eminently suited to his mode oflife.

  There were slight incongruities, but it mattered little to the subjectof our history, and we may presume that he did not see them; or if hedid he did not notice them, which answers the same purpose. Such thingsare at all times more apparent to other people than to those especiallyinterested. Besides, any little shortcomings on the part of theBuccaneer were amply made amends for by his solicitude for the religiouswelfare of others, whose eternal happiness seemed indeed to be more tohim than his own. Wherever he went he took with him his Bible, and as hehad not been able to swallow it wholesale himself, he soothed hisconscience by thrusting it down the throats of other people. If theywould not take it quietly, then he would help them over their difficultywith the point of his sword. It was a principle of his that if peoplewould not go to Heaven, that they must be made to go there, andaccordingly he sent a good many to the other world very much againsttheir will, and very much before their time.

  This bold Buccaneer was perhaps originally intended for a Mahommedan,but being spoilt in the making he became an indifferent Christian. Tellhim this, and it would be wise to clear out at once, and make tracks forthe remotest part of the world.

  As a matter of course he must follow the example of all other Christianpeople, and enroll himself under the protection of some saint. Now,whether it was by chance, or whether he was possessed with a grim kindof humour, it would be impossible to say. Indeed, he may have had agenuine admiration for the man. The fact remains that he chose as hispatron George of Capadocia, who seems to have done a very good businessin the way of bacon. It is at all times a difficult matter to form atrue estimate of a character far back in history; but it is probablethat the whole saintly calendar does not contain a more disreputableblackguard than this self-same George; but he is now a saint "de mortuisetc.;" the bold Buccaneer having now had a good serviceable religionmanufactured for him, and having also been fitted out with a goodelastic and easily worked conscience, he was himself again. Away themerry rover went, cracking a head here and a crib there, and returninghome with whatever happened to fall in his way.