Loving You

“Lay back, sweetness, while I taste you.”

  My eyes widened in horror. “You’re going to . . . down there?”

  With a wicked smile, he winked at me before he buried his face between my legs.

  “Ohmygod!” I cried out as I felt his tongue slip inside of me. Something raced through my veins as I dropped back and grabbed the bedding with my hands. My back arched while I took in the sheer pleasure of his mouth on me.

  This. Is. Freaking. Amazing.

  “Jesus, you’re so wet.”

  I hissed as I felt his finger push into me. It wasn’t like the feeling was new. I had given myself plenty of orgasms, but his finger in me. That did something to me.

  “So tight. So perfect.”

  His mouth was on me again, licking and sucking as my body shook with anticipation.

  “Yes . . . oh God!” I cried out, not caring how loud I was or who might hear.

  I felt him push another finger in. Pleasure and pain hit me at the same time.

  “Jase!” I cried out as my orgasm started from the tip of my toes and moved up. Angling my body to just the right position, he took me to a place I’d never been before.

  I slammed my hand over my mouth to hide the screams of absolute pleasure in case anyone was still here at the hotel and had not left for lunch yet.

  When I finally felt myself coming back to earth, I felt Jase’s body over mine. He was kissing along my neck as I wrapped my legs around him, pulling him closer to me.

  “I want to kiss you,” he panted in my ear.

  “Kiss me! God Jase, I want more of you!”

  The desperation in my voice shocked me as I begged him for more. When his lips pressed to mine, I swore I tasted blood before I tasted myself. Never in a million years would I ever think I’d let a guy go down on me and then kiss him.

  Jase was no ordinary guy. He was so much more.

  When we finally needed air, he pulled away and stared into my eyes for what seemed like forever.

  “Condom, Taylor, I need a condom.”

  My chest tightened. “Please tell me you have one.”

  With a smile that caused my stomach to flip, he said, “I’d have never come to your room without one.” I lifted a brow as he pushed off me and laughed. “Hopeful, I was very hopeful.”

  He reached into his jeans and pulled out his wallet. Ripping the condom open, I watched him put it on.

  “I wish you would have let me do that.”

  He let out a huff and shook his head. “If I had let you put that on I’d have embarrassed myself.”

  “Oh,” was all I managed to say.

  With his eyes sparkling like I’d never seen them before, he crawled over me again and pushed himself against my already sensitive clit.

  “Promise me you’ll tell me if I’m hurting you.”

  I nodded. “I promise.”

  His hand moved between my legs as he pushed his fingers inside of me. I moaned in pleasure as he moved faster. I could feel the build up again.

  “Jase! I want you inside of me,” I cried out as he pressed his thumb on my clit, causing my orgasm to erupt like a volcano. His mouth captured my moans as I felt his hand retreat and he positioned himself and slowly pushed in as my body was still riding from my high.

  “Fucking hell,” he hissed against my mouth. “Oh God, you feel amazing.”

  Pressing my lips together, I held my breath as he slowly pushed in more and pulled out. Each movement was laced in both pleasure and pain, but more the later.

  “Relax, sweetness, you’ve got to relax.”

  With a deep breath in, I relaxed my body as I released the air, letting Jase take me.

  “Jase,” I whispered as he stopped. “No, don’t stop!”

  “Are you okay?”

  “Please don’t stop.”

  His lips softly kissed mine as he pushed in further. I’d never felt so full and complete in my entire life. The burning would have been worse had it not been for him kissing me. I fought to keep my tears back. The pain was more than I thought it would have been.

  His lips pulled back and he stopped moving. “I’m all the way in, baby.”

  My eyes closed as he kissed the tip of my nose, then my lips and along my jaw.

  “Jase,” I whispered as I wrapped my arms around him. I loved that he had little nicknames for me. Each time he called me sweetness or baby, my heart melted.

  He slowly moved in and out. It was like nothing I would ever be able to describe.

  Pulling his head back, his blue eyes captured my gaze. “It’s probably way too early to say this, but I love you, Taylor. I’ve loved you from the first moment I saw you.”

  A single tear slowly made its way down my cheek as I replied, “I love you too. I’ll always love you.”

  Something moved across his face, but was gone as quickly as it came.

  He moved again, this time he was not so in control as he moved faster. My body fought between it hurting like hell and feeling amazing. My hips found a rhythm as I kept up with him. I’d heard friends talk about never being able to have orgasms during sex, and some had them all the time. I knew I was going to be keeping company with the ones who did as my entire body became enflamed.

  “Jase,” I panted out. “I’m going to come again. Oh God! Oh God!”

  “Fuck!” he called out as he pushed in hard and fast and called out my name.

  We had come together. It was the perfect ending to a beautiful moment.

  Nothing would ever be the same again.

  Nothing.

  Jase

  “When can we do that again?” Taylor asked with a giggle.

  We laid on the bed as I held her in my arms, still relishing in the high from making love to her.

  “I think I need lunch, then maybe we can sneak back up here.”

  Resting her chin on my chest, she flashed me a smile that caused my stomach to drop. “Lunch? I am kind of hungry.”

  I nodded my head. “Let me go back to my room and change. I’ll meet you down at the hotel restaurant in fifteen minutes.”

  Her eyes lit up as I pulled her up and kissed her. The soft moan that escaped from her lips made my body instantly warm.

  When our lips parted, we held each other’s gaze. “Finally,” she whispered with the sweetest smile.

  A lump formed in my throat. I felt like a dick for all the times I led her on, only to push her way. My own stupid insecurities played a role in that and I still wasn’t sure if I was the guy she needed. That first night alone in her apartment when she told me her dreams of wanting to become a financial analyst for her grandfather’s company in Austin, I knew she would never be happy being a rancher’s wife. It was my dream. Not hers.

  I made it down to the restaurant with a few minutes to spare when I saw Cammie North walking up to me.

  “Fuck,” I mumbled under my breath.

  “Where were you?” she asked with a fake smile.

  We had messed around a few times and had one crazy night I wanted to forget and put behind me. The best thing for me to do was nip this shit in the bud. “I was with Taylor.”

  Her eyes turned dark. “Taylor?”

  “Yes, Cammie, Taylor. We’re together now, so whatever fun you and I had in the past, it’s in the past.”

  Something moved over her face. “What would Taylor think if she knew you got drunk and fucked me and then my best friend?”

  I grabbed onto her arm and pulled her closer to me. “Are you trying to threaten me?”

  Her eyes searched my face before letting out a curt laugh. “With that little bit of information? No. I highly doubt she’d care she is so fucking infatuated with you.”

  With a glance over my shoulder, she looked back and kissed me before I could stop her. Grabbing onto her, I pushed her away while she let out a chuckle.

  “Listen, I don’t know what game you’re playing here, Cammie, but I’m not interested in you.”

  Something evil moved over her face. “You’ll never make her happy,
you know that right?”

  My hand pushed through my hair as I sighed. “So you’ve told me before.”

  “Your little princess would never be happy playing farm girl after she lands her dream job.”

  My heart felt as if someone was squeezing it. “And you would?” I asked.

  Taking a step closer to me, she nodded her head and went to grab my dick. Pushing her away again, she softly said, “To have you every day for the rest of my life. Yes, I would be very happy. But I’m warning you, if you walk away from me Jase Morris, it will be the biggest mistake of your life.”

  Letting out a laugh, I replied, “I’ll take my chances.”

  Turning, I saw Taylor standing there. She looked over my shoulder at Cammie.

  “Think she saw the kiss?” Cammie whispered as she walked past me. “Hey, Taylor. Hope you’re feeling better. You look awful.”

  Taylor shot daggers at Cammie as she walked by.

  “Don’t listen to her, Taylor. She’s a bitch.”

  When she looked back at me, she asked, “What happened?”

  I knew it was best to be honest with Taylor. For all I knew she had seen Cammie kiss me.

  “She kissed me, but I pushed her away immediately. She was just trying to cause trouble like always.”

  Glancing down, she pressed her lips together before looking back up at me. “Is she one of the girls you’ve slept with before?”

  I wanted to tell her no, but I would never lie to her. “Yes.”

  “I see.”

  Taking her by the arms, I pulled her closer to me. “It’s my past, Taylor, and it has nothing to do with us right now. I swear to you, nothing has happened between us in over a year.”

  “Okay,” she barely spoke.

  Placing my finger on her chin, I lifted her eyes to mine. “I swear to you. Please say you believe me.”

  She paused for longer than I wanted her to before she offered a weak smile and said, “I believe you.”

  “Let’s eat okay, sweetness?”

  She nodded as I slipped my hand around her waist and led her to the restaurant.

  After we ordered drinks, Taylor and I quickly forgot about Cammie.

  “So, what are your plans once we get back to Texas?” I asked as I took a bite of food.

  Her smile lit up as she said, “I’m starting work for my grandfather. He’s offered me an analyst position within his company.”

  My stomach twisted and Cammie’s words rushed through my head. How would this work between us if she worked in Austin and I worked in Llano?

  “That’s awesome,” I said with a forced smile.

  “What about you?” she asked.

  With a hard swallow, I reached for my beer and took a drink. “I’ll be heading to Llano to work on my father’s ranch full time.”

  Her smile faded as she looked down at her food and pushed it around. “How often will I get to see you?” Glancing up, she continued to talk. “I mean, with you living in Llano and me in Austin, how are we . . . I mean . . . I could always go part-time at my grandfather’s company.”

  It was then I realized I could never let Taylor walk away from her dream . . . no matter how much I loved her. I knew what I had to do and it was going to destroy both of us in the process, but it was the only thing I could think of.

  Taking in a deep breath, I slowly blew it out. “This isn’t going to work.”

  Her eyes widened in shock. “Wh-what isn’t going to work?”

  “This. Us. I mean, if you’re going to be starting a new position within your family’s business, you’ll be working long hours. I’ll be working long hours and we’ll be almost three hours away from each other.”

  Slowly shaking her head, her mouth parted open. “What are you doing, Jase? Do you regret what happened between us?”

  “What? No!” I gasped. “What happened between us earlier was the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

  Tears filled her eyes. “Why do you keep doing this?”

  “I . . . I’m just not sure I deserve you and I would never want you to leave your job because of me.”

  “Why do you think you don’t deserve you?”

  My eyes looked over at Cammie who was sitting at the bar watching everything. I knew if given the chance she would tell Taylor about the night I spent with her and her friend.

  Pushing my hand through my hair, I lowered my voice. “I’ve done something in my past I’m not proud of and if you ever found out about it . . . you might think differently of me.”

  Her eyes widened in shock. “You think that little of me? So you have a past? I don’t care about that.”

  My head was spinning. “I want to feel like I deserve you, Taylor. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”

  Taylor stood, pushing her chair back. “But yet you sit here and tell me it won’t work. I should have known you would do this. You got what you wanted and you’re casting me to the side . . . again. My sister was right about you.”

  Pinching my eyebrows together, I stood up. “What? That’s not what I’m doing at all. I love you, Taylor, and I only want to do what is best for you.”

  “So, fucking me and then telling me it won’t work is best for me?”

  I quickly glanced around before turning back to her. “No, wait, that’s not what I meant.”

  She held up her hand. “Are you with Cammie also?”

  My head jerked back. “You’re seriously going to ask me that after what happened between us today?”

  With a shrug, she stared at me. “Well, I don’t know, Jase. Maybe there is more to you I don’t know about.” She folded her arms across her chest while waiting for an answer. How could she think I would do that to her? “No, I’m not with Cammie. I’m not with anyone.”

  Hurt instantly washed over her face as I pushed the chair back and walked away. Before I was even out the door, Cammie was walking up to me and following me out.

  “It would have never worked, Jase. You have to know that.”

  Once I stepped outside, the humid air hit me and took my breath. I turned to the left and walked. I had no idea where I was even going. Cammie followed me for a bit before I stopped and looked at her. “Leave me alone for fucks sake, Cammie.”

  Her jaw tightened as she narrowed her eyes in anger. “Are you dismissing me?”

  With a roll of my eyes, I shook my head. “Fucking hell yes! I don’t want to have anything to do with you.”

  She shook her head. “You just made the biggest mistake of your life, Jase Morris.”

  “Somehow I think the biggest mistake of my life was walking away from Taylor just now.”

  Jase

  October—Llano Texas

  I sat and stared out over the pasture as my father went on and on about Ava breaking her leg and staying back in Montana.

  “I’m sure she’s gonna be fine, Dad. Stop worrying.”

  “Did you even hear a damn word I just said?”

  Turning to face him, I gave him a blank expression. I’d spent the last few minutes dreaming of my lips on Taylor. Hearing her soft moans as I made love to her. “Yeah, you’re going on and on about Ava.”

  He pinched his eyebrows and shook his head. “Son, I haven’t said a damn thing about Ava in at least ten minutes. Don’t tell me you’ve been sitting there nodding your head and mindlessly answering me.”

  “Um . . .”

  He shook his head and walked over to the fence we had just finished repairing. “Do you see this fence?”

  Okay, where is he going with this?

  “Yes. I see the fence.”

  “I might as well have been talking to it for the last hour. What in the world is weighing on your mind, son? You haven’t been yourself ever since you got back from Europe, and I swear if I didn’t know any better I’d say your favorite horse died this morning with the way you’re sulking.”

  Jumping off the tailgate, I smiled. “I’m not sulking and nothing is wrong. I’m just tired I guess. Went out last night
with a few friends.”

  He lifted his brow and gave me that look when he doesn’t believe that line I’m feeding him. “Tired? Well you better snap the hell out of it.”

  I gathered up the tools and put them in the bed of the truck before facing him and asking, “How did you know Mom was the one?”

  He stopped and looked at me. It never failed, any time he talked about or thought of my mother his eyes lit up. With a chuckle, he shook his head as if lost in a memory.

  “The first time I met your mother I wasn’t sure if I wanted to kiss her or strangle her.”

  “That’s funny, Mom says the same thing about you.”

  A roar of laughter escaped from his lips. “Yeah well, there was an attraction there from the very beginning. One I’d never felt before, so that was probably my first clue. Then my desire to protect her from everything and everyone was most likely the second clue.”

  “You never felt that with any other girl besides Mom?”

  He shrugged and replied, “I’m sure to some point, but with your mother everything was different. She consumed my every thought. One day it hit me how much I cared for her, but I was stupid.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I pushed her away because I didn’t think I was good enough for her.”

  My heart dropped as I listened to my father.

  “She walked away from me and it felt like I couldn’t breathe. I knew in that moment, I wouldn’t ever be able to live without her. Life just wouldn’t be the same if she wasn’t by my side, so I went after her and told her how I felt.”

  I reached for the fence pulls and sighed. “What if you feel all of that, but if you follow your heart, you risk making her unhappy?”

  “How would you make her unhappy if you follow your heart and it leads you to love?”

  “I don’t know, say she isn’t a country girl. She wants a life in the city, working and doing the whole corporate world thing. I mean, Mom already lived here.”

  He leaned against the truck and studied me. “Talk to me, Jase.”

  I dropped my head. “Shit,” I mumbled under my breath. “I messed up, Dad.”

  “You messed up how?”

  “Taylor. The first time I saw her it felt like the air around me changed. She smiled and I was lost in her eyes. I hadn’t ever seen a girl so beautiful before. Everything about her was perfect, especially the little dimple that only comes out when you really make her laugh. Every time I saw it I had to fight the urge to kiss her.”