Breaking Free
****
Hawk settled back against the car seat with a sigh. Damn it! Why couldn’t he get his butt out of the car and just go knock on her door? Instead of sitting here hoping to catch a glimpse of her.
Because things hadn’t changed. He was still going wheels up with his team and he still wouldn’t be there for her. But he wanted to be. Badly. He squeezed the steering wheel hard and with a sigh reached for the key in the ignition.
From next door, a bright red sports car shot free of the connected parking structure like a bullet and sped down the street. Flash.
Hawk started the car and pulled out into the flow of traffic. Flash wove through the streets like a stunt car driver in a car chase. Hawk followed him from a cautious distance. When he pulled into the parking lot next to his apartment, Hawk pulled in right behind him.
Flash had exited his car when Hawk pulled in and cut the engine. Flash paused as Hawk got out of the car. “Hey, LT. What’s up?”
“I thought you might have time to show me the CD of images you’ve pulled off the video I gave you from the hospital.”
“Sure, come on up.”
The apartment looked like a show place for chrome and glass. The modern furnishings looked expensive but dust coated the glass-topped tables and where a flat-screened TV used to hang was an empty spot. A tall entertainment center took over one wall. The shelves that had contained electronic equipment, a DVD burner and recorder, VCR-DVD combo, and an expensive stereo system, stood empty.
“What happened to all your stuff, Flash?”
“I’ve put everything but my computer in storage, for when we go wheels up. If someone breaks in they won’t have anything portable to steal, but the microwave.”
Flash led the way into a bedroom converted into an office. His duffle bag with all his equipment sat in one corner already packed. The wide, flat computer screen nearly took up the top of the desk. He popped in a CD and waited for the images to come up. “I got quite a few stills of the top of the guy’s head. He knew the cameras were there so he kept his head turned. But I caught a glimpse of his mouth and chin on one slide.” He clicked through the images one at a time then paused on one. He looked up at Hawk. “What do you think?”
Hawk studied the curve of the man’s jaw and the thin set of his lips. It looked like Derrick Armstrong. A sinking feeling hit the pit of Hawk’s stomach and he drew a deep breath. He’d known all along that it had to be one of them, but affirmation dealt a blow that hurt.
Flash leaned back in his seat. “I’ve been sitting on this. I didn’t want to bring it to you, LT. We’ve been in the same team since buds and I didn’t want to believe Strong man capable of turning on one of us, but--if it isn’t him it looks a lot like him.”
Hawk nodded. “Burn me a copy of the images you have. I’ll need to turn it in to Captain Jackson.”
Flash unscrewed the lid on a canister of blank CD’s and popped one into a drive. “I invited Zoe to fly to Vegas with me. I thought she might enjoy checking it out.”
A rush of pain caught Hawk unaware and his face grew hot. “When do you plan to go?”
“Tomorrow. They haven’t canceled leave yet and I have a buddy who can fly me back if we get called in.”
Silence stretched between them. Flash continued to monitor the progress of the disk. Hawk nursed his pain and the sudden flare of resentment. She hadn’t wasted any time moving on.
It was his own fault. He’d had his chance and he’d thrown it away.
Flash popped the disk out, labeled it and handed it to him.
“Thanks.” Hawk swallowed against the knot in his throat.
As he walked back to the car, he drew deep breaths to contain the pain.
He sat in the car for several minutes, the silence beating at his ears as heavy as his heartbeat. He’d been going through old letters from his mother, trying to get a handle on his guilt. Trying to understand why she hadn’t sent for him. Something his mother had written to him played through his thoughts.
Every day we have together is a gift. Every experience we share another gem to cherish. As a son, you’ve filled my heart with pride and love, always. But I worry that you’re waiting to live your life after you’ve served your country, instead of living it while you’re serving it. You’ve chosen a difficult path, but you don’t have to be alone to follow it.
Had she known she was dying even then? Had she been trying to prepare him for it? Saying good-bye? And trying to tell him other things as well?
She had faced his decision to be a SEAL with pride, though he knew she’d worried for his safety, just as Zoe worried.
The jealousy and pain he’d been feeling eased. Zoe loved him, and she didn’t take that love lightly. She wouldn’t throw herself into someone else’s arms hoping to fill his place.
She’d been offering him a gift, a gift that had cost her dearly to give him. She’d known what she was taking on, had seen it first hand with her father, her brother, and still she’d been brave enough to do it.
And he’d shoved it aside. And the words he had spoken to her--He flinched.
He’d been without her for nearly a week. A week of pure hell. At least together they’d see each other, share things. If she’d let him make it up to her. But first, he’d have to get her to talk to him.
Hawk reached for his cell phone, flipped it open, and selected the number. “Hey, Trish. I have a favor to ask.”
When he shut the cell phone a moment later, he looked down at the CD he still held. Lang hadn’t found an image like Flash had and he’d been all over the footage. He’d compare the footage himself with both CD’s before he took everything to Jackson.
A guy who had bashed in his teammates head wouldn’t think twice about framing someone for it. He had to know he wasn’t helping him do it.
CHAPTER 25