Holding You

  “Yes, sir. I do have something I’d like to talk to you about. May we go to your office?”

  Scott raised his eyebrow and nodded his head. “Sure. Let’s go.”

  My heart was beating like crazy in my chest as I followed Scott to his office. Opening the door, we stepped in and I looked around. Pictures covered the walls. They were a mixture of Scott’s prized horses, pictures of Jessie and Lauren and pictures of all of us on trips we had taken together. Walking up to one picture, I smiled. The moment I saw her smile a warmth rushed through my body.

  “You really love her don’t you, Colt?”

  Smiling, I nodded my head. “Yes, sir, I love her very much.”

  Turning, I looked at Scott. He had always been like a second father to me. Really, all of my father’s friends were like second fathers. Each of them had taught us boys lessons that I would cherish forever. Letting out a quick breath, I got ready to talk. My hands began to sweat so I rubbed them against my pants. “Take a seat, Colt and tell me what’s on your mind.”

  Worrying my lower lip, I sat down. Clearing my throat, I looked Scott right in the eyes. “I want to start off by saying I hope you know how much it means to me that you have faith in me. I’ve always dreamed of helping you with your business for as long as I can remember. I feel like I have some fresh ideas to add to the smooth operation of the breeding business as well as the racing side of your business.”

  Leaning back in his chair, Scott gave me a slight grin and nodded his head. “Why do I feel like there is a but in there somewhere, Colt?”

  “Sir, this is a bit awkward to talk about it since this has to do with Lauren.”

  Scott moved a little in his seat. “Go on.”

  “Lauren loves this ranch sir. She dreams of running it one day alongside of you and the last thing I want to do is stand in the way of that.”

  Scott’s eyebrows raised and I wished like hell I could read his mind. Was he angry with me for speaking about this? Was he going to tell me to get out of his office? I couldn’t read his eyes at all.

  “Lauren has expressed some concerns with me, sir.”

  Clearing his throat, Scott moved about in his chair again. “Concerns?”

  Nodding my head, I kept talking. I was in too deep now to turn around and drop it. “She feels like you don’t think she can run this ranch without um . . . well, without help from . . . ah.”

  Narrowing his eyes at me, Scott leaned forward. “Spit it the hell out, Colt.”

  “Well, um, she said you told her she needed a man to help her run the ranch and she fears you’re going to stick her in the office with her mother and that is the last thing she wants. If you take me on these trips and keep Lauren out, she’s gonna think I’m pushing her out of what she considers her position within Reynolds Breeding. Sir, the last thing I want to do is have Lauren feel like I’m taking something from her. I love her too much to do that to her.”

  Leaning forward, Scott placed his elbows on the desk. His eyes were burning with something. Anger? Yep. That sure looked like anger to me. Fuck. He’s going to give it to me. Good-bye trips to Kentucky and New York.

  “She told you I said she needed a man to help her run the ranch?”

  “Um . . . yes, sir, she did.”

  Something passed over Scott’s eyes. It was gone before I could really tell what it was.

  “Tell me, Colt. Where do you think Lauren’s position is in my business?”

  Ah hell. He stressed my. Swallowing hard, I thought about how I wanted to answer this question. “Scott, it’s not my place to say where Lauren belongs, or even where I belong. I do know that she loves this ranch. She loves every single one of these horses and I’ve witnessed her first hand with some of them. They love her just as much as she loves them. She has a gift that I don’t really know how to explain. She can calm them with a single touch. She seems to know things about them before she even works with them.” Letting out a chuckle I shook my head. “I’ve even seen her talking to them, and I swear they understand her.”

  Looking back to Scott, he was smiling as he listened to me. “Scott, let Lauren help me train the stallion.”

  Dropping back in his seat he shook his head. “No. No way do I want her near that horse. No.”

  Looking down, I thought about the first time Lauren told me her fears about me and why she pushed me away from her. I would not stand in the way of her dreams, but I knew if Scott didn’t give Lauren the chance to prove herself, it would always be someone in her way regardless of if it was me or some other guy Scott hired.

  “Scott, please forgive me if I’m speaking out of line, but you’re making a terrible mistake holding Lauren back from what she was clearly meant to do.”

  Scott narrowed his eyes and if looks could kill, I’d have been dead on the floor right now. “That’s my daughter, Colt. My everything. Do you understand that?”

  His fists were balled-up as he glared at me. “I understand, sir, but I still think you’re making a mistake and it will ultimately lead to you pushing Lauren away.” Standing, Scott’s chair flew back and hit the set of cabinets behind him. “Do you think because you’re dating my daughter that gives you the right to tell me what she should and shouldn’t do with this business? Son, you are more than stepping over the lines here. You’re just her boyfriend. I’m her father and I have nothing but her best interests at heart. There is no way I’m putting her in harm’s way.”

  It was my turn to stand up and ball my fists. “Just her boyfriend?” Shaking my head, I felt the heat move across my body. “I’m sorry, sir, but I love Lauren with my whole life. She is my everything, and if that means standing up to you on this and arguing for her, I’ll do it. Even if it means you ask me to leave. I have faith in Lauren. I believe in her and I know she would do better at taking over this ranch and running it over any guy you bring in here.”

  Pointing to me, Scott asked, “Does that include you? Can she run this business better than you?”

  Staring into Scott’s eyes, I felt the frog forming in the back of my throat. Clearing my throat, I said, “If given the chance to prove what she can do, and I don’t mean organizing files—”

  Scott glared at me when I made that last comment. “I really think, sir, you would be surprised by some of the ideas she has for things.” Letting out a quick breath, I said, “Scott, she is your daughter. This has been her entire life. I can remember watching her follow you around and asking you everything she possibly could about the horses.” Shaking my head, I looked down, then back at Scott.

  “Sir, don’t hold her back. She has so much more to offer than sitting behind some desk being unhappy and miserable. The stallion. That is in her blood.”

  Reaching back and grabbing his chair, Scott pulled it in close to him and sat down. Motioning for me to sit, I did as he asked. Beads of sweat began to form on my brow, and I was waiting for Scott to chew my ass out.

  Looking down at his desk, Scott pursed his lips together and nodded his head. “I’ll never forget the first time I walked into the barn and saw Lauren dragging a stool over to a stall. She couldn’t have been more than four or five years old. She climbed up onto the stool so she could reach Blazin’ Fire. Damn that horse was a bitch of a mare. Hated everyone but she had some of the best racing bloodline in her than any other horse I had before or since her. Blazin’ walked up and looked over the stall door at this tiny little curious thing. Lauren reached up and said, “Fire Girl, let me touch you.”

  Smiling, I saw tears fill Scott’s eyes as he paused. It was as if he was drinking in the memory. “Blazin’ leaned as far down as she could and Lauren rubbed her neck. Then she wrapped her arms around Blazin’s neck and that damn horse lifted Lauren right off the stool. My first instinct was to run in there and grab Lauren, but something held me back. Lauren held on for dear life as her laughter filled the barn. A few other horses snickered as if they knew what was passing between Blazin’ and Lauren. Slowly setting her back down on the stool, Blazin’ snicker
ed and bobbed her head at Lauren who laughed again, then proclaimed that she was going to love Fire Girl for the rest of her life.”

  A tear threatened to spill from Scott’s eyes before he quickly wiped at his eyes. “She’s always been fearless like that, Colt. Always. The first horse she was ever one, was Blazin’ Fire. That damn horse moved like she was walking on a cloud anytime Lauren was on her. No one else could ride her. I mean no one. I came out of the barn one day when Lauren was around eleven. She was riding up from the pasture on her Fire Girl. Those two were inseparable.”

  Nodding my head, I whispered, “I remember.”

  Glancing at me, Scott said, “Yes, you would remember because wherever Lauren was, you were there, too. The two of you, training horses and pushing things always to the limits. It’s always scared me.”

  Scott let out a chuckle. He was about to say something else when a look of fear crossed his face. Dropping his face into his hands he let out a frustrated moan. “Dear God, what have I done?” Slowly shaking his head, Scott dropped his hands. “I did tell Lauren that.” Scott’s face was pained and my heart broke for him. “I also mentioned you when I told her that. I mentioned you taking over the ranch someday.”

  My mouth went dry and I had a hard time swallowing. Shit.

  We sat in silence for a few minutes. “All right. Have Lauren help with the stallion. I’m trusting you on this, Colt. That girl is my . . . she’s . . . if anything ever happened to her.” Scott’s voice cracked.

  Standing, I nodded my head as I attempted to push down my own fears. “Believe me, sir. Lauren is the very air I breathe. Without her with me, I honestly don’t think I could go on. I will do everything in my power to always keep her safe.”

  Getting up, Scott reached for my hand. His grip was firm and he shook my hand quickly before dropping it. “I know you will, Colt. I appreciate your love for my daughter. I want to tell you how lucky you are to have her, but I’m sure you know that. Just know, Colt, she is also the lucky one as well.”

  By the time I walked out of Scott’s office, it felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Scott wasn’t holding Lauren back because he thought she couldn’t handle the task. He was holding her back out of fear of something happening to her.

  Pulling the baseball cap out of my back pocket, I slipped it on and headed back to the barn with a smile plastered on my face. All I could see was my future with Lauren. Her and I together, working on the ranch and starting our own family here. Watching our own daughter someday fall in love with the horses.

  Stepping into the barn my happiness quickly disappeared when I saw Rachel and her father standing there talking to Ryan, Scott’s trainer.

  Fuck. Just when life seemed to be going in the right direction. Rachel glanced over to me and smiled as she winked, then licked her lips. Rolling my eyes, I turned and headed into the tack room. Shutting the door, I pulled out my phone and sent Lauren a text.

  Me: Talked to your dad. He loves the idea of us working on the stallion together!

  Lauren: What? Are you serious?

  Me: Yep. And we are going to Kentucky twice this summer and New York.

  Lauren: That’s amazing Colt! I can’t wait to get home now!

  Smiling, I dropped my head back against the door and prayed like hell Rachel would be gone by the time I stepped out of this room.

  Jumping when someone knocked on the door, I heard her voice. “Colt? Colt are you in there?”

  Glancing back down at my phone I knew what I had to do.

  Me: Rachel is here at your dad’s. Looks like her father is dropping off a horse

  Lauren: Yeah, I know. I scheduled it before I left. I love you, Colt Mathews

  Letting out a chuckle I whispered, “Damn, I love you.”

  Me: I love you more.

  Opening the door quickly, Rachel let out a yelp and jumped back as she looked behind me into the room. “Who were you talking to?”

  Walking past her, I hurried over to a stall to start cleaning it out. “Lauren.”

  “Right. Little sweet Lauren. How’s that working out for you, Colt?”

  Turning around, I glared at Rachel. “Considering I’m planning on asking her to marry me, I’d say it was working out pretty damn good.”

  Rachel sucked in a breath of air as she took a few steps back. Glaring at me with that look that used to make my skin crawl, she lifted her chin and whispered, “Your loss.”

  Letting out a chuckle, I said, “Enjoy your afternoon, Rachel.” Turning back around, I began cleaning out the stall. Scott cleared his throat behind me and I glanced over my shoulder.

  “Tell me what I just overheard was just simply a way of you getting Rachel to leave you alone.”

  Laughing, I set the rake up against the stall door. “Yes sir, but, there is one other thing I needed to ask you now that we are on the subject.” Walking closer to Scott I gave him a huge smile.

  Scott closed his eyes and let out a pain filled moan. “Oh, son-of-a-bitch. I was not ready for that one.”

  SPINNING MY ALEX and Ani bracelet on my wrist, I closed my eyes and felt the heat move across my body. Colt had given me the locket bracelet the night before I left for Colorado after we had made love in the bed of his truck. Letting out a long sigh, I felt someone bump my shoulder.

  “Daydreaming of a certain blue-eyed cowboy?” Alex asked with a smile.

  Nodding my head, I let out a chuckle. “Oh, Alex. I’m so afraid I’m going to wake up and this is all going to be a dream.”

  Grinning, Alex looked out at the beautiful Colorado countryside that was passing by us. We were riding the Durango train back down the mountain after spending the day on it. We had stopped at a few little towns to shop along the way.

  “It’s not a dream, Lauren.” Turning back to me, she took my hands. “I’ve never seen my brother so happy, Lauren. It’s almost like you can feel the love just pouring off his body. He was actually singing in the shower the other day. My mother and I walked into his room and stood there giggling as we listened to him singing. It was kind of cute.”

  Feeling my cheeks blush, I squeezed Alex’s hands. “What about you and Will? How are things going?”

  The smile that spread over Alex’s face was contagious. I smiled back at her. “The wedding?”

  Letting out a sigh, Alex’s face lit up. “I’m so excited, Lauren. Everything is just falling into place.”

  My heart was bursting with happiness for Alex and Will. They went through a lot the first year they were together, but their love pulled them through it all.

  “I think it is so romantic that you’re getting married under the same tree your parents did.”

  Placing her hand over her mouth, tears formed in Alex’s eyes as she stifled her sob. “Me, too. It’s beyond perfect. I mean, when my parents got married there, our house wasn’t there, but there is something magical about that tree. I feel it in my heart.”

  Reaching up, I wiped a tear from Alex’s cheek. “Why are you crying, Alex?”

  “Because I’m so happy, Lauren and at the same time I’m so afraid the floor is going to fall out from underneath me because I’m so happy.”

  Pulling her into my arms, I held her tight. “Alex, everything is going to be perfect. Don’t worry about a thing.”

  Sniffling, Alex nodded into my chest. “I’m so scared, Lauren.”

  “Oh, honey. Why? Why are you scared?”

  Pulling back some, Alex worried her lower lip. “I don’t know. I love Will so much and I really can’t wait to start my life as his wife but at the same time . . . I’m getting married in a little over a month.” Letting out a nervous giggle, her eyes widened. “Married. As in Mrs. William Hayes.”

  Staring at Alex I tried to hold it back, but I couldn’t. I busted out laughing. It didn’t take Alex long to start laughing also. Before long, we had tears streaming down our faces and I wasn’t even sure why we were laughing. Grace and Maegan walked up and looked at us with smiles.

 
“What’s so funny?” Grace asked as she walked up to us.

  Wiping my tears away, I winked at Alex. “Just being silly and we lost control of our giggles.”

  We spent the rest of the train ride planning our evening. We were going to dinner, then dancing at a local club that would allow Taylor and me in.

  THREE HOURS LATER, Grace was grinding up against yet another cowboy as we all sat at the table and watched. After the song ended, she meandered her way back over to us.

  “Whew. Damn, that boy was hot! I was pretty sure I was one move away from getting his number.”

  Maegan jumped up. “That’s it! Okay, the first one to get a guy’s number wins!”

  We all looked around at each other and then back to Maegan. “What in the hell are you talking about, Meg? I thought we all agreed no getting wasted tonight,” Libby said with a wink.

  “I’m not wasted, I’ve only been drinking water all night. Come on y’all! It’s innocent fun.”

  Taylor shouted over the loud music. “What do we get if we win?”

  Maegan looked around at each of us. “If we all chip in fifty bucks, that would be three hundred dollars.”

  Alex jumped up. “I’m in! I have a wedding to pay for.”

  Libby started laughing. “Okay, but for those of us with guys, no kissing is allowed so those who are single, no kissing either.”

  Grace rolled her eyes. “That is totally not fair, Libby.”

  “The only lips my lips touch are Colt Mathews.’”

  Alex gave me a wink and mouthed, thank you.

  The air in the dance club suddenly became thick. The music was a mixture of country, hip-hop, and pop. My stomach tightened and I wasn’t too thrilled about this bet, but the way Maegan was eyeing me was starting to piss me off. Turning to Grace, Maegan said, “This is in the bag for either you or me. Let’s do this.” They both slapped hands and I seethed with anger.

  How dare Maegan think that just because we had boyfriends we couldn’t still pull a number from a guy.

  “Who’s up first?” Grace asked.