A Beautiful Funeral
"That was ... odd ..." Trenton said.
I grabbed my husband's hand, pulled him to stand, and then walked down the hall and out the back door. Jim had decided to wait until everyone left before spreading Thomas's ashes and warned he would likely wait until just before the boys left. He was in no hurry to do something so final and needed a few days to breathe after the funeral.
"What is it?" Trenton asked.
I didn't stop until we were under the shade tree in the farthest corner of the backyard, near the fence. The boys had carved their initials into the bark; the only difference was the middle letter. The grass was bare in some places, already dehydrated from the Illinois heat. The temperatures were hovering in the mid to high nineties, and the buzzing of the cicadas took the place of the birds. It was too hot to sing, too hot to move. The only breeze felt more like a heater blowing on us than a reprieve. But there we were, outside in a black dress and suit. Beads of sweat had already formed along Trenton's hairline.
"Something's not right," I said.
"I know."
"You know?"
Trenton loosened his tie. "Something's off. Travis is acting weird. Abby and Dad are acting weird."
"Do you think he knows?" I asked.
"Knows what?"
"The reason why Travis is acting so weird. He knew the twins were hotshots. He knew about Travis and Thomas. Maybe he senses something is off, too."
Trenton shook his head. "I dunno. Maybe."
"They wouldn't ..." I hesitated. "You don't think they would ..."
"Lie again?" Trenton muttered. "Yeah, I do."
I tucked my chin and wrinkled my nose, feeling silly for even saying it aloud. "But not about ... I mean, you don't think Thomas is alive somewhere, getting updates about his grieving family."
"No," Trenton said. "They wouldn't do that to Dad. I know you want him to be alive. I do, too. They've lied, but they wouldn't do that."
"You heard them at the hospital. Liis isn't going to testify. Mick is missing, so he's unable to testify. The Carlisis were seen leaving town. Maybe this was all to keep anyone else from getting killed."
I could see in Trenton's eyes that he wanted to believe my theory, but even after revealing the truth about Thomas and Travis, to think they were capable of causing our family so much agony was farfetched at best.
"Dad isn't in great health. Travis wouldn't risk it."
"Would Dad want him to?" I asked.
Trenton mulled it over. "Yeah. He probably would."
"Would Thomas and Travis know that?"
Trenton's eyes bounced from one point on the ground to another. "Yeah, but ..." He sighed, at his limit. "I can't hope for that, Cami, c'mon! If it's not true and Tommy is gone, I'll lose him all over again."
"Keep your voice down," I said, reaching for him.
"Why?"
"Because if it's true, this is all to show the Carlisis that they don't have to threaten our family anymore. If it's true, then someone is still watching."
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
ABBY
I READJUSTED AGAINST THE HARD WOOD of the NICU nursery rocking chair, thanking the nurse when she brought a folded blanket to cushion me. Carter had a few neighbors, meaning we'd made friends with two sets of new parents. Scott and Jennifer's daughter Harper Ann was born five days ago, and she was experiencing a setback. She'd been struggling hour to hour for the last twelve hours. Jason and Amanda's son Jake had been born two days after Carter. We were afraid he wasn't going to make it, but he'd recovered and was nearly as big as our son was. Carter was nursing consistently and gaining weight, so he'd be able to move to the step-down unit soon, and then we'd be able to take him home.
"Morning," Scott said, passing me to greet Harper Ann. Even though the couples had children in the NICU, Travis had insisted on a full background check. Scott was a former Marine; a half-inch thick, long, curved scar left a crevice just above his ear toward the back of his head, disrupting his silver hair, a scar from a head wound he'd survived in Afghanistan. Travis felt better leaving us alone when Scott was there, and lately, that was a lot.
I nodded to him, patting Carter's back. Carter let out a strong burp, and Scott and I chuckled.
Scott scrubbed his hands in the sink and then leaned over Harper Ann's bed. "Hi, baby." She stirred, and a wide grin spread across Scott's face. "Mommy's on her way up. Yes, she is. She's talking to Gramma and the doctor. She can't wait to see you. She talked about you last night until she fell asleep."
I rocked Carter, turning to smell his hair. Dark, wispy sprouts covered his head, and I loved to feel them against my cheek. It was a new experience, nuzzling one baby at a time instead of two. Jessica and James were my first try at motherhood, and they were so much work that I didn't have many instances to just sit and enjoy them. Carter was quiet for the most part and loved to be held. We snuggled every day, and the nurses said he'd fuss just before I arrived, seeming to know I would be there soon. Once he was in my arms, we were both content.
I hummed to him, trying to imprint the memory in my brain; his smell, how small his diapered tush felt in my hand, the length and softness of his fingers. The shape of his fingernails. The way his lashes fell against his cheeks when he slept. The sound he made when he breathed. He would be bigger tomorrow. I didn't want to forget.
"Well, hi there," Shelly said, greeting Travis.
I felt my eyes widen, and I tried not to wake Carter in my excitement while I watched the nurse help Travis with his sterile gown. I leaned forward as my husband bent over to kiss me. He pecked my lips and then rushed over to the sink to scrub his hands. He seemed animated. He nodded to Scott and then returned to me, holding out his hands for our son.
I giggled. "Did you miss him?"
"Gimme," he said.
We traded places, and Travis cradled Carter. No matter how much Carter grew every day, he still looked tiny in Travis's enormous arms.
Travis pushed back gently with his toes, rocking our son while gazing down at him.
"You've been gone three days this time," I said. "Don't forget, Lena isn't here to help."
"Tying up loose ends," he said.
"You have good news?"
He looked up at me. "It's done."
I crossed my arms across my middle, hesitant to hope. "What's done? Like permanent done or investigation is done so we start the trial process."
"A few of them will go to trial."
"And the rest?"
"It was the last raid, Pidge. There aren't any Carlisis left. The rest are soldiers. Grunts. They're being held without bail. They'll be in the system for a year before they're sentenced, and then they'll spend thirty years in prison by the time they serve for every count."
"And Mick?" I asked, feeling my throat tighten.
"Immunity, as we promised. As long as he stays away."
I nodded, satisfied. "And now?"
Travis cleared his throat. He was getting a little emotional. It had been five weeks since the funeral. Liis had been staying with us, and it was difficult watching her wait.
"He's coming home."
"Today?"
Travis nodded.
"Does Liis know?"
"I thought we'd let him surprise her."
My hand flew up to my mouth. "And your dad? What about the twins?"
"They're on their way home."
They were just here two weeks before, visiting more often to check on Jim. The funeral had taken a toll on him. He'd lost weight and had grown more frail every day. Travis's smile faded as he watched our sleeping son, the burden of the truth on his mind. He was here, but he was a million miles away, worrying about his father's and brothers' reactions.
"They'll understand," I said, kneeling in front of Travis.
"No, they won't," he said, not taking his eyes off Carter. "They'll hate us."
"Maybe for a while, but they'll get over it. They have to."
Travis looked up at me with tears in his eyes. "Was it worth it?"
"It probably seems all for nothing now that everything is fine, but before, when we weren't sure? It happened exactly the way we'd hoped. They backed off. It bought us time to form a plan without being targeted." I touched his arm. "It was a good plan. Difficult from start to finish, but it worked."
Travis nodded and then returned his gaze to our son. "We have to go soon. He's on his way."
"On his way here? Now?"
"He hasn't seen Stella since she was two days old, Pidge. He can't wait any longer."
I couldn't argue with that. "When?"
Travis looked up at the clock on the wall. "Two hours."
"Oh, my God. He's really coming home."
"He's really coming home."
Liis was standing over Carter's crib, her daughter surrounded by blues and greens. Stella had been using Carter's nursery while they were staying with us. I was glad. Stella's presence made my son's room feel less empty.
Liis tucked her dark hair behind her ear. It was six inches shorter than the last time I'd seen her, just a couple of hours before.
"You cut your hair," I whispered, feeling stupid for stating the obvious.
She turned to me flatting the strands against her head with her palm. "Yeah." Her eyes filled with tears.
"What's wrong?" I asked. I'd never seen Liis cry until she arrived at Jim's to tell us all the news. Now, it seemed she cried every time she spoke. "You don't like it?"
"I just," she sniffed. "I wasn't thinking. I'll look so different when Thomas sees me. Stella will look so different. If I'd kept it the same, it wouldn't be so shocking for him."
"He'll love it," I said, reassuring her. "He will. You don't look that different. He'll notice, but he'll love it."
She turned toward the crib. "Maybe it will grow out by the time he comes home."
"I hope not," I said. She looked at me. "Your hair grows slow."
She breathed out a laugh. "True."
I gestured for her to follow me to the living room, and she complied, looking back at Stella once more before padding to the hallway. She swiped the baby monitor receiver off the dresser and then closed the door behind her, leaving it open a crack. Val was in the kitchen, the potato chip sack crinkling as she fished inside it. Agent Hyde was standing by a living room window, always on alert.
"Chill, Hyde," I said. "You're making me nervous." Her dark eyes narrowed, and then she returned to her watch. She pulled the curtain back and then shifted her stance, readying to act. I realized she wasn't just her usual overcautious self. "What is it?"
"I don't know," Hyde said.
Travis checked his phone and then patted Hyde on the back. "Calm down. We've got a team headed this way."
"Why?" Hyde asked.
Travis shrugged. "Got some news they want to tell us in person, I guess."
Hyde and Liis traded glances, and Liis took a step toward Travis. "Is it Thomas? Is it over? How did your trip go?"
"Trip went well. Maybe they're coming to congratulate me."
Travis's ability to lie had increased tenfold during his time with the FBI. The second year of our marriage, the guilt of lying to me was all over his face, but he got better at it. Just before I told him I knew the truth, I could barely discern a meeting from a raid. He had no choice but to learn quickly. Most undercover agents were away from home for months at a time, if not longer. Travis was hiding in plain sight. He'd already been offered a position with Benny, so he just had to say yes. The Carlisis knew that he would come home to Eakins often, but the downside was he also knew Travis had family--and how to control him.
Travis had been careful, but we knew it was only a matter of time before they found out. But the years passed, and Travis seemed to be untouchable. Soon, he was one of Benny's most trusted men, going from bodyguard, to shaking down local clubs, to advisor. The FBI watched with excitement as Travis climbed the ladder of one of the largest, most dangerous crime families in the nation. Travis got a promotion from within the FBI as well. Five years after his recruitment, Travis went from asset to agent, and five years later, Thomas was sure they'd gained enough evidence to nail Benny. He didn't factor in Benny's wife, Giada. She was a paranoid woman, and she didn't trust Travis. That was when the Carlisis learned the truth, and everything after that happened very fast. Thomas called to inform me that they'd lost contact with Travis, and it was very likely his cover had been blown. That night, Thomas said Travis was taken to an unknown location, but they would find him soon. The next night was our anniversary; the night Benny and a few of his men were killed. It could have been Travis. We were lucky that time, and I wasn't sure how much longer my luck would hold out.
I'd handed him intel on my father, and in return, Travis promised to never lie to me again. He looked me in the eye the night he came home, his eye swollen, his brow and lip cut, and told me he was okay, and I chose to believe him. It took him being run off the road and nearly murdered to admit that he'd been the one to pull the trigger.
Lying was the hardest habit to break, especially when we believed we were protecting those we loved.
Now, he was standing in our kitchen, skirting around the questions Liis and Agent Hyde were asking. I watched him speak half-truths without blinking an eye, and I wondered just how much he knew that I didn't. How many times he'd been able to keep secrets because I didn't want to believe he had any.
"Congratulate you for the trip?" Liis asked. "So it's done, then?"
"The only suspect we're missing is Giada. We can't connect her directly ... yet ... but we will."
"Giada Carlisi?" Val asked. "So we're not done. Because Giada has her own people, and the Bureau killed her husband and sons. She's a crazy bitch."
"We're done," Travis said.
"What about Giulia? Vittoria? Her bodyguard Chiara? What about Angelo's new wife?" Val said, her tone bordering accusatory.
"Angelo got married? When?" I asked. He was an uncompromising bachelor, married to the family. He was known to assault his girlfriends, and only one had stuck around more than a year. We had so many pictures of her battered body; I wondered how long she would stay. Then she disappeared. I wasn't sure if I should fear the woman who had finally tamed him or fear for her.
"We're currently unable to locate Coco," Travis said.
"Since when?" Val asked, seeming concerned.
"Since yesterday."
"Coco is Angelo's wife?" I asked.
Travis nodded, but he didn't look at me, a telltale sign he wasn't being completely honest.
"Then we're not finished," Val snapped. "Any loose ends equals unfinished. They are the wives of the Carlisis, and Chiara is a known hitman for Giada. What? They aren't dangerous because they're women? Tell me you're not that stupid."
Travis bristled. "We have it covered, Val."
"It's all or nothing," Val said, pointing at him. "Those words came from your mouth, Maddox."
"I know what I said."
"Then why are you being so careless now? Why would you ... oh." Recognition flashed in her eyes, and she realized the rush. Thomas was in a hurry to get home, and no one could argue with that. Not even the director.
Liis covered her mouth, her eyes glossing over.
Agent Hyde put her hand on her holster, inching back from the kitchen window curtain with two fingers. "Incoming," she said.
Liis tried to run for the door, but Travis stopped her.
"Just wait," he said.
Agent Hyde relaxed. "It's not us."
Travis's brows pulled together. "Who is it?"
Hyde nodded toward the door. After two knocks, Trenton pushed through, leading Camille in by the hand. They instantly knew something was up, gazing around to the strange positions of everyone in the room.
"Fuck," Travis said, glancing out the window, and then tried to herd his brother out the door. "You have to go."
"What the hell?" Trenton said, slinking away from Travis's grasp. "Hi to you, too, spunk trumpet."
"Seriously, Trent," Travis said. "You can't be h
ere right now."
"Why not?" Camille asked.
"We're having a family meeting," I said.
"We're not family?" Trenton asked, offended.
Travis sighed, and then raised both arms, pointing eight fingers at the door. "You have to leave, Trent! Now! We'll explain later, but for now ...."
Something outside caught Hyde's attention, and she held up a finger. "Everyone quiet. Incoming."
Travis rolled his eyes and pulled Trenton to the side. "Whatever you see in a few seconds, just ... try not to freak out. Let Liis have her moment."
"What do you mean?" Trenton asked.
"Just keep your fucking mouth shut for once," Travis growled.
"What's going on?" Camille asked me.
"You keep it together, too. This was supposed to be for Liis."
We waited behind the sofa, staring toward the door. Liis stood in the middle of the room holding the baby monitor in her trembling hand. The door opened, and Thomas stood in a white button-down shirt and navy slacks, freshly showered and shaven. He was breathing hard from running up our long drive. He stepped through the threshold, a wide grin on his face. Liis ran, throwing her arms around him, sobbing.
Trenton's knees buckled. Camille and Travis held him up for a few seconds before letting him fall to his knees.
Camille kneeled next to her husband. "I knew it, baby!" she said with a smile on her face. She kissed his cheek, rubbing his arm with her hand with excitement.
Trenton shook his head slowly, his mouth hanging open. "What the hell is going on, Travis?"
"We'll explain later," Travis said, watching his oldest brother with a smile.
Trenton looked up at Travis. "There's an explanation?" He stood and took a breath, preparing to throw a tantrum. Before a sound came from his mouth, Travis grabbed Trenton's shirt with both fists, dragging him into the kitchen. Camille and I followed, trying to calm them both in hushed tones.
Travis shoved Trenton's back against the refrigerator.
"Don't you fucking start," Travis said. "I know this was hard on you and unbelievably unfair, but Liis has sacrificed the most in all of this, and you're not going to ruin this for her. Do you understand me?"
Trenton tensed as if he might make a move but then took a deep breath. His eyes filled with tears, and betrayal replaced the anger. "You lied to us? He was alive this whole time, and you lied to us? Dad's health has gone down the shitter. How could you do that?"