Rebellious Desire

  Bradford waited to hear Paul’s answer but instead of an angry retort, he heard the crash of glass breaking. “What’s going on in there?” he demanded as he tried to move Caroline from the doorway.

  Caroline struggled and, realizing that he was far superior in might, quickly changed her plan. She threw her arms around his shoulders and pulled his head toward her. And then she kissed him, as thoroughly and as passionately as he had taught her. The distraction worked and Bradford quickly became a willing participant. His last coherent thought was that he would remove Caroline from the doorway and drag Charity from the library just as soon as he had finished kissing the woman who actually believed she could undermine his intentions.

  Inside the library, Charity continued to play the woman scorned. She picked up another vase and hurled it in the vicinity of Paul’s desk. In her heart, she was plainly horrified by her actions. She wanted to weep with sorrow each time she looked at her love and saw the pain in his eyes.

  Paul was forced to duck when the second vase nearly hit the top of his head. He stood up then, his hands clenching the edge of the desk as he leaned forward. He no longer tried to shield his face with his hands. “For God’s sake. Can’t you see the damage? Put on your spectacles, Charity, and look at my face.”

  Charity didn’t argue. She opened her purse, dumped the contents on the table nearest her, and quickly put on the wire-rim spectacles. Then she turned, her hands on her hips, and gave Paul a long stare. “Well?” she demanded in return.

  “Are you blind?” The anger suddenly went out of Paul Bleachley. He was so confused by her reaction. “I am no longer handsome, Charity. Do I have to point to each scar?”

  His voice was filled with despair but Charity was heartless to it. “You vain man! So that is your trick, is it? To try to convince me that a few paltry marks are the reason you discarded me? Ha! I’m not an imbecil, Paul. Surely you could do better than that. Did I bore you? Did you find someone else? Tell me the real reason and perhaps I will forgive you.”

  “There isn’t anyone else,” Paul replied, yelling again. “I can only see with one eye now, Charity. See how the other bulges? How handsome do you find that?”

  Charity was forced to grab a rather ornate arrangement of flowers and throw it toward Paul. “Then wear a patch if it bothers you,” she demanded.

  “And the scars, Charity. What do I do about the scars?”

  “For heaven’s sake, Paul, grow a beard. And quit changing the topic. We are talking about your broken promise to marry me. Vanity is not the issue here.”

  Charity fluffed her hair while she paused for breath and then turned and replaced the items in her purse. She took her time about the chore, knowing that Paul was staring at her every move. “I am wearing a new hairdo and you haven’t even commented,” she remarked while she pulled the drawstring to her purse closed. “All you can think about is yourself. Well, I am only glad to know that I found out what a vain man you are now, before our marriage. I will have to reform you, Paul. You do understand that, don’t you? Or are you dense as well as vain?”

  “Reform me?”

  Charity caught the whisper and looked at Paul again. She saw the glimmer of hope in his eyes and knew, in that instant when their gazes held, that she had truly won. “And now, before I leave I will issue you an ultimatum,” Charity said. Her voice sounded brisk and she was pleased. She carefully put on her white gloves and began to pace in front of Paul’s desk. “You will either present yourself to my uncle and declare your intentions within a fortnight, or I will assume that you no longer love me.”

  “I have never stopped loving you, Charity, but—”

  “And I have never stopped loving you, Paul,” she interrupted. Her expression was solemn as she slowly walked up to the side of the desk. Paul turned to her and she gently placed her hands on his cheeks. She stretched on tiptoes and began to place small kisses along his injured cheek. “Please don’t misunderstand me, Paul. I am sorry that you were injured. But the past cannot be undone and we must look to the future.”

  She allowed one long, satisfying kiss that Paul instigated and then pulled back. Her attitude suddenly became brisk again. “Don’t you dare try to run away again. I would find you, no matter where you tried to hide. And if I don’t see you at my uncle’s house soon, I do believe I will become quite violent. You will only have yourself to blame, Mr. Bleachley.”

  And with those words of warning, Charity straightened her shoulders and opened the door. She walked right past Bradford and Caroline, ignoring the startled expression on her cousin’s face as she pulled away from Bradford’s embrace, and continued until she was outside.

  Caroline was more affected by the kisses she had shared with Bradford than she cared to admit. She blushed and hurried after her cousin, muttering that she was certain she had told Bradford that he could not take liberties with her anymore.

  Bradford stood with his mouth open as he listened to Caroline’s ramblings. He turned when he heard Paul behind him and was amazed that his friend was smiling. What had he missed? he asked himself as he watched Paul start up the stairs to the second floor.

  “Where are you going?” he demanded, frustrated because he was no longer kissing Caroline and because he hadn’t a clue as to what had been decided between Bleachley and Charity.

  “To grow a beard,” Paul called over his shoulder with a shout of laughter.

  Charity alternated between crying and laughing most of the way home. Caroline patted her hand and listened as she told how much she loved Paul and how he had suffered. Bradford kept trying to get a word in, to find out just what had happened, and finally Caroline took mercy on him and explained. “I knew that if Charity showed the least bit of sympathy, Paul would turn his back on her. You gave me that clue, Bradford,” she remarked.

  “I did?” Bradford searched his mind and couldn’t remember saying anything that would give her that idea.

  “Certainly,” Caroline replied. “Pity would be the last thing that Paul would accept. The way he closed himself away indicated that,” she added. Her voice sounded like she was instructing a very simpleminded person.

  She turned back to Charity and said, “Did you tell him that you would shoot him if he tried to run away, dear?”

  “I think so,” Charity said with a nod. “Or maybe I told him I would sue him for breach of promise. I can do that, can’t I?”

  “There won’t be any need,” Caroline predicted. “You just told me that he kissed you and told you that he still loved you. I don’t believe you’ll have to shoot him.”

  Bradford rolled his eyes with pure exasperation. “For God’s sake. Charity couldn’t shoot anyone,” he scoffed.

  “I know I couldn’t,” Charity immediately answered. She grinned and added, “But Caroline could put a hole through a speck of dust if she had a mind to. And she would shoot Paul if I only asked her.”

  Bradford looked shocked, and both Charity and Caroline started laughing.

  “Caroline, I will do whatever you say. I promise. You have saved my life with your plan. I will never forget your help.”

  “So her plan worked to your satisfaction?” Bradford asked Charity. “I understand the complexity of it now,” he added with a grin in Caroline’s direction. “She had you scream Paul into submission.”

  Caroline looked disgruntled but Charity laughed. “You told me he didn’t have a sense of humor,” she remarked to Caroline. “I do believe he is trying to jest now.”

  “By the way, Caroline,” Bradford said, “Charity may have promised not to tell your father about our kiss, but I haven’t.”

  “Just what are you implying?” Caroline asked, her eyes wide with alarm.

  “You will find out soon enough,” Bradford said with a chuckle. “Don’t look so worried,” he added without the least hint of remorse in his voice. “You only have to trust me.”

  “I trust you as much as you have indicated you trust me,” Caroline replied with irritation. She turned to Charit
y and commented, “For your information, that means not at all. Bradford doesn’t trust any woman.”

  Charity didn’t say a word, only looked from one to the other and then back again, wondering what had happened. The atmosphere had suddenly, drastically changed and she was confused by it.

  “You will not talk to my father.” Caroline’s voice didn’t suggest an argument.

  “I will.” Bradford’s voice matched Caroline’s in intensity.

  “Nothing will come of it,” Caroline predicted.

  “You fool yourself,” Bradford announced. “I will—”

  “Don’t say it!” Caroline all but shouted the demand, sure that he was about to say that he would have her. Hadn’t he said that often enough already? And now he was about to blurt it out right in front of her delicate cousin.

  “Say what?” Charity asked.

  Neither Caroline nor Bradford answered. They both turned and glared at her, and Charity leaned farther back against the seat of the carriage. Whatever had she done? she wondered. And for once in her life, she decided to keep her thoughts and her questions to herself.

  Chapter Eight

  THE FOLLOWING WEEKS WERE FILLED WITH DINNER PARTIES and balls, the days taken up with perpetual visits. Caroline visited Uncle Milo, as the marquis insisted on being called, every other afternoon, and grew quite fond of him. Uncle Franklin, the marquis’s younger brother by a good ten years, was usually there. He resembled his brother in looks but his eyes weren’t as warm. He was more restrained in his manner. Caroline sensed a certain strain between her two uncles that she couldn’t quite put her finger on. They were very polite to each other but there was a distance between them too.

  Franklin was handsome, with dark brown hair and hazel-colored eyes, but there was a coldness about him that Caroline found a little unnerving. His wife, Loretta, rarely visited the marquis, and Franklin explained time and again that his wife had many social engagements. Her presence was sought after by most of the ton, Franklin had boasted. Caroline couldn’t help but wonder just who the seekers were, for she had yet to see Loretta out and about at any of the evening affairs she had attended.

  The Earl of Braxton began to escort Lady Tillman to some of the special gatherings and Caroline was pleased, even though she didn’t much care for the woman. It was good to see her father enjoying himself. He deserved to be happy, and if Lady Tillman turned out to be what he wanted, then so be it. She wouldn’t interfere.

  The incident at the Claymeres’ residence faded in significance as time went on. Caroline was thankful that she hadn’t confided her thought that someone might have pushed her, for now she accepted that it was all her overactive imagination. She had only been clumsy and exhausted.

  But while she no longer considered herself in jeopardy from an unknown assailant, she was feeling extremely threatened by the Duke of Bradford. The man was driving her to the brink of despair.

  She felt constantly off balance. Bradford escorted her to all the affairs and never left her side, making it most clear to any man who came within shouting distance that she belonged to him. She didn’t mind his possessiveness, nor the arrogant way he dragged her off into corners and kissed her until she was quite senseless with desire. What totally confused her was her increasing response to him. Her physical response alarmed her, for all the man had to do was look at her and she felt her knees go weak.

  Bradford had told her that he wanted her, and she had scoffed at him. Yet now, after spending so much time with him, she wanted him too. She was miserable every time they were separated and was furious with herself over it. What had happened to her control, her independence?

  At least she had admitted to herself that she loved him. He, on the other hand, had never mentioned the word. Desire was only a portion of the reason she missed him when he wasn’t at her side. The man certainly did have his flaws but he had his attributes as well. He was kind and generous to a fault, and had a strength of character that Caroline found unbending.

  But he was also a devil! Oh, she knew what he was about, what his “game” was. Every time he kissed her, the look in his eyes was victorious. She wilted in his arms and was sure that he smiled over it. Was he waiting for her to admit that she wanted him?

  Just thinking about her situation made her nerves expand to the breaking point. She would never tell him she wanted him until he told her he loved her. And if the Duke of Bradford was intent on games, then Caroline would play one of her own.

  Charity, on the other hand, couldn’t have been happier or more content. Paul Bleachley had duly arrived and presented himself to the Earl of Braxton and was now officially courting Charity. He was sporting a black satin eye patch that made him look most daring and was also growing a beard.

  Caroline liked Paul. He was a quiet man with an easy smile and she could tell, just by the way he watched Charity, that he loved her and cherished her with all his heart. Why hadn’t she settled on someone as pleasant and mild as Paul? She found herself envious of her cousin’s relationship with the sweet-tempered Englishman and wished that Bradford would look at her the way Paul looked at Charity. Oh, Bradford did a fair amount of looking, but his gaze was very physical, and she didn’t think he was cherishing her at all.

  Braxton had decided that he would give a dinner party and had invited twenty guests. Included in the list were Caroline’s uncles, the marquis and Franklin, and Franklin’s wife, Loretta, Lady Tillman and her daughter, Rachel, and, much to Caroline’s silent objection, Rachel’s disgusting fiancé, Nigel Crestwall. Bradford and Milford had also been invited, as was Paul Bleachley. It would be an early dinner, in deference to the marquis, who tired easily, and those with a stronger constitution would then depart for the opera.

  Benjamin thrived under the pressure of preparing a suitable meal and had the pigeons stuffed, the fish boned, and the chickens turning on the open spit well before noon. Deighton became terribly dictatorial as he commanded the other last-minute arrangements. Caroline and Charity both did whatever Deighton suggested, since he knew what was more correct than either of them, and Charity even asked his advice about which gown he thought she should wear.

  Caroline had already decided to wear the daring ivory gown. It was terribly low cut and, she hoped, extremely seductive. She planned to look the part of a temptress, thinking it high time to gain the upper hand in her relationship with Bradford. If he was going to keep her off balance, then she would return the favor.

  She dressed with care, growing more nervous by the minute. She vowed that it would be a perfect evening. Her plan was quite simple. She was going to make Bradford delirious with desire, drive him to the brink, and force him into telling her what was in his heart.

  Charity found Caroline standing before her mirror and gasped when she got a full look at her cousin. “Bradford will be quite speechless when he sees you,” Charity predicted. “You look like Venus, the goddess of love,” she whispered.

  “And you look just as lovely,” Caroline returned with a smile.

  Charity whirled around, showing off the lemon-colored gown she wore. “I feel wonderful, Caroline. Love does that, you know. Makes one quite perky.”

  Caroline didn’t agree but held her silence. Right this minute, love was making her miserable. She tugged on the bodice of her gown, trying to bring it up just a bit, until Charity remarked that she was going to tear the thing and have to change.

  Caroline sighed and accompanied her cousin downstairs and waited in the entry hall to greet the first guests.

  “Paul and I have decided to be married in England,” she told Caroline.

  “Well, of course you are,” Caroline returned. “Where else would you be married?”

  “In Boston,” Charity answered with a frown. “But we don’t want to wait, and it wouldn’t do traveling together unless we are man and wife.”

  Caroline’s eyes widened in confusion. “But you will live here, Charity. This is Paul’s home. You mean only to visit the family, don’t you?”


  Charity was busy watching Deighton pace back and forth in front of the door and missed the expression on Caroline’s face. “Paul wants to begin anew. He isn’t titled so he won’t be giving up anything of importance. But he isn’t poor either and has grand plans. Papa will help him get established,” Charity ended.

  “Yes, of course,” Caroline commented. “What will he do?” She tried to sound interested but suddenly felt overwhelming sadness. She didn’t think she was ready to lose Charity. Her cousin was her only link with her family in Boston.

  “He has already had long talks with Benjamin,” Charity said in answer. “Paul wants to buy some land and become a gentleman farmer. Benjamin has agreed to help him.”

  “Gentleman farmer? Charity, there is no such thing,” Caroline scoffed with irritation. “Not in the Colonies. It takes hard work and that’s the truth of it. Farming is backbreaking work, every day of the week.”

  “Paul’s up to it,” Charity replied. “He is slowly regaining the use of his injured hand, and you know that my brothers will also show him the way.”

  “Yes,” Caroline said with a sigh. She was still dwelling on Charity’s comment that Benjamin would help. She had no right to think that he would remain in England with her. Why then did she feel she was being abandoned?

  The bell sounded, indicating that the first guests had arrived, and Caroline forced a smile on her face. Deighton paused at the door, turned, and gave both Charity and Caroline a last look of scrutiny. He nodded his approval, schooled his expression into his bored look, and turned back to open the door. The evening had begun.

  Bradford was one of the last to arrive. Caroline muttered her displeasure over his tardiness as soon as she greeted him, and then realized that it wasn’t a very good start to her perfect evening. But then, his reaction to her dress wasn’t very positive either. Instead of telling her how lovely she looked, he suggested in a harsh whisper that she go back upstairs and finish dressing.