Take Me

  Julie gasped and sniffled for several minutes, but she’d stopped wailing immediately. Shade just held her, rocking her slightly and stroking her silky blond hair. He heard the door close, and was surprised that Tina didn't think she needed to supervise the two of them.

  "Mommy said you forgot about my birthday," Julie said.

  "Of course I didn't forget about your birthday, princess. I tried to get here as soon as I could."

  "She said you had to sing at the loud pwace today, so you wasn’t coming."

  "No, I don’t have a concert tonight, but I do have to sing. I have to sing to the birthday girl."

  Julie drew back and looked him in the eyes. Scowling, she grabbed his sunglasses by the nosepiece and pulled them off. "Take these off. I can't see you."

  Eyes exposed, he stared down at her, his heart filled with love and loss, joy and sorrow all at once.

  "Can you see me now?" he whispered.

  She nodded and squashed his face between two sticky hands. He made fish lips at her until she giggled.

  "What do you want me to sing?"

  "The Cinderella song!"

  He chuckled. "I don't think I know that one."

  "I'll teach you."

  "Okay."

  "A dweam is a wish when you fast asweep," she sang, using her arms and hands expressively to punctuate her heartfelt words. He’d have paid for front row seats to watch her perform.

  Shade opened his mouth to sing after her, and she covered his mouth with her hand. "Wait. I messed up."

  “I know,” he said when she moved her hand. “How about some Aerosmith?”

  She sucked in a deep excited breath, her eyes alight with eagerness. “Yes, Daddy. Sing the angel song. See my wings.” She reached over her shoulder and tugged at one of her flimsy, sparkly wings. “I’m an angel.”

  “You sure are,” he said. “An angel princess.”

  He cleared his throat and sang to her, backing the lyrics, as always, with his entire heart and soul. “I’m alone, yeah…” By the time he was belting out the end of the second line, she was squirming in anticipation. He knew what she wanted. She just liked the chorus, so he skipped the majority of the first stanza and went straight to her favorite part.

  Julie beamed as he sang to her. She looked at him with such utter adoration that his throat closed off and he choked over the next few words. She bounced excitedly, and he lifted his free hand to support her back so she didn’t jostle her way out of his arms and onto the brick steps at his feet. She hugged him when he’d finished and fisted her little hand around the cross hanging from the chain at his neck.

  “Now sing the babe song,” she requested.

  He smiled. Couldn’t help it. She always called Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” the babe song.

  “Don’t you want to open your present?” he asked.

  She jerked backward and smiled up at him broadly. She nodded, squirming to get down. He set her on her feet and squatted down in front of her to hand her the pink bag. He wished his gift was better wrapped, something Julie could tear into the way a little kid was supposed to open a birthday present. She tugged out the tissue paper and struggled to remove the large square box wedged inside the gift bag. Shade helped her. When he opened the lid for her, her jaw dropped.

  “Oh, Daddy!” she squealed excitedly.

  “Do you like it?”

  She couldn’t seem to form words. But she could run in place excitedly, her entire body quivering with glee. Shade removed the diamond and pink-sapphire tiara from the box and set it on her head. Her hands flew upward to touch the little crown. “Now I’m a really, really real princess.” She nodded and looked up at him with expectant wide eyes.

  “The most beautiful princess who ever lived.”

  Her dazzling smile did things to his heart that would cause any cardiologist to cringe.

  “I want to see my princess crown in the mirror!” She turned and started to rush for the front door, but he caught her and lifted her into his arms again.

  He knew if she went into the house, his time with her would be over. He wasn’t ready to say goodbye yet. “Can I sing the babe song first?”

  She held onto the tiara with one hand and nodded. “Yes, yes. I love the babe song.” She hugged him with one arm. “And I love my princess crown. And I love you, Daddy.”

  He wished he had his damned sunglasses on. What kind of bad-ass rock star stood outside his ex-wife’s house, clinging to a little girl, with tears swimming in his eyes? “I love you too, baby.”

  “Mommy says I can’t be a baby anymore. I’m a big girl now.”

  “You are a big girl,” he whispered to her. And he wasn’t sure when it had happened. He’d missed so many of her milestones. “But you can be a baby when you’re with me, if you want to.”

  “Sing.”

  He sang “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” as if entertaining a crowd of twelve thousand. When he reached the chorus, Julie acted out the lyrics by offering him one smile and one kiss on the cheek. At the appropriate times, she held him close. She felt his heartbeat with one tiny hand and her own heartbeat with her other hand. He experienced this song on an emotional level whenever he sang it to her. He’d sung it to her in the middle of the night when she’d been an infant; it had never failed to soothe her. As the last line of the chorus rang from between his parted lips, he realized he did miss her. Even though he was holding her, he missed her. Terribly.

  And he’d missed so much of her young life already. Too much. Those moments were lost forever. He needed to find a way to be home more often. His baby was growing up without him. There was no way to put her childhood on hold until he could find the time to enjoy it.

  The front door opened, and Shade’s arms automatically tightened around the little sweetheart in his arms.

  “You sing good,” Julie said. “I want to sing when I grow up. I want to be just like you, Daddy.”

  When had all the oxygen evacuated the atmosphere? Shade struggled to suck air into his suddenly nonfunctional lungs.

  Standing in the doorway, Tina huffed out a breath of annoyance. “You want to be a cheating, no good, high school dropout? I don’t think so, Jules. You’re going to college.”

  Shade didn’t know why she had to keep busting his balls. It was hurtful enough when she did it to him alone, but when she did it in front of Julie, he couldn’t stand it. He wondered what kind of bullshit the woman said about him when he wasn’t around. It was a miracle he had any sort of relationship with his daughter.

  “Time to go inside, Julie,” Tina said.

  “Do you want to see my new dollhouse, Daddy? It looks like a palace. And it has a princess doll. And it has a bed in it for she’s apposed to sleep.” She yawned at the mention of sleep.

  “Daddy has to leave now,” Tina said.

  “Are you coming back tomorrow?” Julie asked.

  “I have to sing at the loud place tomorrow,” he said.

  “Are you coming back in two more sleeps?” she asked.

  He shook his head.

  “Three more sleeps?” she bargained, holding up three fingers.

  “Six more sleeps.”

  Her slim eyebrows crinkled in confusion. She held up five fingers, and he added one of his own. She gave him a horrified look. “That is too many sleeps, Daddy.”

  “Is that thing real?” Tina sputtered, plucking the tiara off Julie’s head and gaping at it.

  “Of course, it’s real. I’m not going to give her junk.”

  “She can’t wear this.”

  “Give it to me,” Julie insisted, making a grab for it.

  “Just great, Jacob. You come here, disrupt everything, give her something she can’t possibly keep, and now I have to be the bad guy and take it away from her.”

  “Why do you have to take it away from her? It’s not yours. It’s hers.”

  “What if she loses it? Or if the stones fall out? Or someone takes it? Or if she’s kidnapped because of it? Jesus,
Shade, this thing must’ve cost you ten grand.”

  If she knew what he’d spent on it, he had no doubt that she’d hock it and buy herself another hundred pairs of shoes she never wore.

  “Just let her wear it around the house,” Shade said. “It’s insured if it gets damaged or lost. She’ll be fine.”

  “Give it to me,” Julie wailed. “I’m a princess. A really real princess. My daddy said so.”

  “Now you’ve got her crying again,” Tina grumbled and jerked Julie out of his arms.

  “Me?”

  “Why do you have to be so stupid, Shade? It’s as if you were born without a brain.”

  “Don’t frickin’ call me stupid in front of Julie, Tina.”

  “The truth hurts, doesn’t it?”

  “Daddy!” Julie screamed as Tina carted her into the house and slammed the door in Shade’s face. “I want my princess crown. I want it!” He could hear Julie’s tantrum through the door.

  He hadn’t meant for his gift to be a problem. He’d just thought Julie would like it. The cost hadn’t been a consideration. Maybe he should have bought her some rhinestone piece of junk instead. Julie would have never known the difference. She was three. Four, he reminded himself. Fuck. He really was stupid.

  Cursing at himself under his breath, he picked up the empty box, stuffed it into the pink bag with the crumpled tissue paper and hung it on the doorknob. Julie was farther from the door now, so he couldn’t hear what she was screaming, but there was no doubt she was still upset. Maybe he should do everyone a favor and get lost permanently.

  Shade snatched his sunglasses out of his pocket and put them back on. He wasn’t sure how he was going to get home. He supposed he could call a cab. He turned to start down the driveway; he’d figure it out once he was far enough away that he couldn’t hear Julie’s crying. Because God, that sound was like a knife stabbing and twisting into his chest, and he knew Tina wouldn’t let him do anything about it. He felt so fucking powerless.

  The door behind him opened.

  “Jacob?” a gentle voice said from behind him.

  He paused and turned slowly. He probably should’ve expected her to be here, but he was in no way prepared for his body’s reaction to her. His heart leapt, gut clenched, balls tightened. Her shoulder-length brown hair swayed gently in a warm breeze. Her hazel green eyes brightened as her lovely face broke into a genuine smile. Time stood still as he allowed his gaze to travel down her lean body. Those long tanned legs just might be the death of him. It had been a long time since he’d seen her.

  “Amanda.”

  Chapter 2Amanda probably shouldn’t have watched Jacob’s private moments with his daughter through the window, but she couldn’t help it. She had wanted to open the window and listen to his gorgeous voice, but Tina had been pacing the room, calling him every lewd name she could think of, and he didn’t need to hear that. Amanda understood why Tina hated Jacob. He’d hurt her by cheating on her with another woman. Well, several other women. Amanda didn’t expect Tina to forgive him, but trying to keep him away from his daughter? That wasn’t right. Especially when it was so obvious that they adored each other. He needed that little girl in his life. And despite what Tina thought, Julie needed her father.

  Amanda stepped out on the front step and closed the door behind her. She hoped their mom talked some sense into her sister so she’d let Julie wear her tiara. Jacob had done a wonderful job picking out something Julie would love. He obviously knew his daughter well and had put some thought into the gift.

  “Once Tina cools down, she’ll let Julie wear it,” Amanda said. She wished he hadn’t put his sunglasses back on. He had the most beautiful blue eyes. And his short black hair, tanned complexion and thick black eyelashes made them even more striking. She had every inch of his handsome face memorized—sexy lips, straight nose, high forehead, strong jaw, stubborn chin. She’d wanted Jacob “Shade” Silverton for so long, she couldn’t remember a time when thoughts of him hadn’t flitted through her head constantly.

  “I wouldn’t be so sure,” he said.

  “How’s the tour going?” she asked. Small talk to keep him close for as long as possible. If Tina knew Amanda was out here talking to him, she’d have a coronary. That was the problem with being infatuated with your younger sister’s ex-husband. There was no way to make it work without someone getting hurt or someone going crazy.

  Jacob smiled gently. “It’s going great. Music is the only thing that goes great for me.”

  He glanced up at the big brick Georgian-style house. Julie could no longer be heard screaming. Maybe Tina had relented already.

  “You don’t have a show tonight?” She knew damned well he didn’t. She bought tickets every time Sole Regret performed in Austin. She kept close tabs on the band’s touring schedule, because the next best thing to hanging out with Shade Silverton was watching him perform on stage. If Amanda hadn’t figured he was going to be in town today, she wouldn’t have bothered getting into a huge fight with Tina for not inviting him to Julie’s party. Instead of doing as Amanda had suggested, Tina had conveniently forgotten to tell him anything. So in the interest of her niece’s happiness, Amanda had meddled. She hadn’t told Tina that she’d sent Jacob a text about the party. While she sometimes felt compelled to stick her nose in other people’s business, she didn’t have a death wish.

  Jacob shook his head. “We’re in San Antonio tomorrow, so we decided to stay the night at home. The drive between here and there isn’t bad.”

  She nodded in understanding and glanced down the driveway looking for his sexy-as-sin, electric sports car. There was no Tesla Roadster in sight.

  “Where’s your car?”

  “Someone stole it.”

  She gaped at his nonchalance. “Someone stole it?”

  “Yeah.” He shrugged. “It can be replaced.”

  “So how did you get here?”

  “Owen dropped me off. I was just going to call a cab to take me home. I’ll be out of here in a few minutes.”

  “I’ll drive you,” she offered much too eagerly. She needed to be careful, or he’d figure out how much she desired him. She didn’t want things to be awkward between them. It had to be impossible for him to forget that she was sister to the woman who made his life hell.

  “That’s not necessary. You should go back to the party.”

  “It’s over. All the kids are gone. I was just helping clean up.”

  “Oh.”

  “This will give me a great excuse to get out of washing pink icing off the walls.”

  He grinned, and she melted. It was as if the man had some magical ability to remove her bones.

  “All right,” he said. “As long as it helps you out.”

  “I’ll go grab my purse and keys.” She darted into the house and found her mother in the rocking chair holding Julie. The little birthday princess was wearing her new tiara and fast asleep with her thumb in her mouth. Amanda melted. Julie must’ve inherited that magic from her father. God, she loved the kid.

  “I have to leave,” Amanda whispered to her mother.

  She nodded. “I’ll let Tina know. She’s upset about Jacob again.”

  “She’s always upset about Jacob.” Amanda leaned over to kiss her mother’s cheek and then her niece’s temple before grabbing her purse and dashing back outside.

  She found Jacob where she’d left him. He was staring up at the house as if in a trance. She wondered what he was thinking about behind those dark sunglasses.

  “Julie’s asleep already,” she told him. “And wearing her tiara.”

  Jacob released a deep breath. “I don’t like it when Tina jumps on me like that, but I really hate it when she does it in front of Julie. Your sister probably talks bad about me all the time.”

  Amanda didn’t want to confirm his suspicions. Though they’d never been exactly close, Tina was her little sister. But still, Jacob was right. Tina did talk smack about him all the time. That was the main reason why Julie got confu
sed about the role her father played in her life. Jacob could make an effort to see his daughter more often, but the amount of crap he had to take from Tina every time he showed up would have turned most men away.

  “Julie loves you,” Amanda said, unlocking her car doors with the button on her key fob. “That’s all that matters.”

  “I just hope she doesn’t change her mind.”