Toxic

  Gabe

  My eyes roamed greedily over her lips. I couldn’t manage to pull my gaze away from her mouth as she took a sip of water and leaned back in her chair.

  “Finished?” I stood and walked over to her side of the table.

  “Yeah.” Saylor sighed. “No more fish.”

  “So…” I held out my hand and pulled her to her feet then wrapped my arms around her. “About that last tear.”

  Her eyebrows knit together in confusion. “I thought that the whole fish throwing thing and naked cooking got rid of that last tear. Besides, enough tears have been shed on both ends, Gabe.”

  “True.” I pressed a kiss to her mouth and smiled against her lips. “But I want to be really sure.”

  “Really sure?”

  “Yup.” I laughed. “I don’t want to leave any room for doubt.”

  “Doubt about what?”

  “The way I feel about you. The way I feel about us. The way I feel about everything.” I sighed and released my hold on her hands, taking a step back so I could gather my thoughts better. “Today was Princess’s funeral. But Kimmy? She’s been gone for four years.” I shrugged. “Honestly, I thought I’d feel broken forever.”

  Saylor didn’t move a muscle.

  “But…” I paced in front of her. “I don’t. For some reason, in her death, I finally feel whole. Like everything’s come full circle. But there’s still something missing.”

  “More fish?” Saylor offered.

  “You’re getting warm.” I smirked and purposefully strode toward her.

  “Water?”

  “Even warmer.” I grinned, tilting her chin toward my face.

  “More… boats?”

  “With sails…” I sighed. “And people who man them…”

  “You lost me.”

  “Saylor.” I kissed her mouth. “I’m missing you. You’re the final piece to the puzzle, the star on the top of the Christmas tree.”

  “I have always wanted to be a star.” She grinned.

  “Be serious.”

  “Call me a star again.”

  “Say…” I groaned her name. “I love you.”

  “I love you too.” Saylor’s arms snaked around my neck as she pressed her lips against mine, once, twice, three times. And then pulled back.

  “I know you’re young…” Damn, my throat was dry. Stupid nerves. “But, I want to start a life with you — I want to be with you. Forever.”

  Saylor’s face lit up. “What exactly are you asking?”

  “You’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?”

  She nodded.

  I fell down on one knee.

  And that’s when she started sobbing.

  “I swear the harder I try to fix your tears, the more you cry. I’m going to be a nervous wreck around you for the rest of my life.”

  She nodded again, wiping the tears from her eyes.

  “Saylor.” I cleared my throat “I know you’re young. I know you need to finish school. I’m great with that, because I’m not going anywhere. I want to build my life here, with you. I want to have a beginning, a middle, and an end to our story. I want to create music with you. I want to take care of you. The last thing in this world that I deserve, is the gift of your love, the gift of your commitment to me. I realize that…” I shrugged, using the shrug as a way to actually process this huge moment.

  Funny, my whole life had been based around Princess, but now that I had the freedom to have a future. All I saw was Saylor. Living wasn’t living without sharing that life with her.

  “But I want you anyways, by my side. I want you to marry me.” My hands shook as I grabbed hers and squeezed. “Damn, I think I’m doing this wrong.” Nervous, I briefly broke eye contact and then looked up at her perfect face. “I love you. I love you more than life itself. I never want to say goodbye. And I don’t want to pretend ever again. Please, be my wife?” Please say yes, please say yes. Please don’t kick my ass…

  Saylor nodded and then jerked me to my feet. Our mouths met when I was about halfway off the ground.

  “I’m excited,” Saylor sobbed, “to start our story.”

  “Sweetheart…” I kissed her soft mouth. “Our story started the first time I laid eyes on you and you fell on your ass.”

  “Thanks for the reminder.”

  “Stalker.”

  “Turtle.”

  “Maybe we’ll come up with better nicknames.” I kissed her harder across the mouth and pulled back.

  “Later.” Saylor’s tongue pushed past my lips.

  Groaning I lifted her into the air and assaulted her mouth, “Right. later.”

  Epilogue

  Gabe

  6 months later

  “Wife!” My yell echoed around the house. A smile formed on my lips when Saylor walked around the corner with her hands on her hips and glared.

  “When I said new nicknames I meant something sexy.”

  “Sorry.” I shrugged helplessly. “Wife…” I said it in a deep sultry voice and then started peeling off my clothes. First my shirt, second my jeans, third my boxers.

  Saylor’s breath hissed out of her mouth as I stood in front of her naked. “You were saying? Wife?”

  Saylor focused in on my abs, legs, arms — really every part of my body but my face.

  I snapped my fingers. “Hey, up here. We’re about to have a serious talk.”

  “Like that?” She pointed at me and squeaked.

  “Yup.” I crossed my arms.

  “Fine.” She pulled off her shirt.

  “Wait.” I held up my hands. “What are you doing?”

  “Two can play this game.” Her hands moved to her jeans.

  We’d been married two days. Two actual days.

  Rather than waiting, Saylor and I decided that, doing the whole long engagement thing? Not working so well, especially considering it felt like we were practically living together anyway.

  Besides, if there was one thing we learned it was that we weren’t promised tomorrow, only today, so we got married.

  “Say…” I groaned once her jeans fell to the floor.

  She stepped out of them, clad in only her bra and underwear and then moved her hands.

  “Wait!” I shouted my eyes fighting to figure out where to look first. “Our very serious discussion can’t happen if we’re both naked.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yeah.” I moved toward her, slowly, “It’s against the rules.”

  “And who put you in charge of the rules?”

  “Sweetheart, I’m Ashton freaking Hyde.”

  “Ah,” Saylor nodded, a knowing gleam flaring in her eyes. “Pulling the celebrity jackass card… classy.”

  I tilted my head to the side and lifted my hands helplessly into the air. “If the shoe fits.”

  “The shoe’s about to find its way to Gabe Jr. and we all know how fond you are of every part being in working order.”

  Snorting, I rolled my eyes, “Please, I didn’t hear you complaining last night, or this morning.”

  “Whore.”

  “I’m your whore.” I pointed out. “So it’s totally legal.”

  “What’s this discussion about?” She crossed her arms making her breasts pop up in her bra, distracting me considerably from my goal of winning the battle I’d started.

  “Up here.” Saylor snapped her fingers in front of me. “You have three seconds.”

  “Dishwasher.” I pulled her against me. Damn, her skin felt good. “You forgot to load it.”

  “False.” She breathed, arching her body into mine. “That was your chore for the week, check the chart.”

  “I made the chart.”

  “Aw, Ashton freaking Hyde, are you pouting?”

  “No.” Yes.

  “The chart,” Saylor pointed out, “was only established for what reason?”

  I glared.

  “Sorry, I didn’t catch that.” Saylor cupped her ear.

  Grumbling, I looked down and answered, “Be
cause I have a bad habit of baking too many cookies, feeding them to you, and then not cleaning up my mess.”

  “Right.” Saylor nodded. “So technically this discussion is a moot point.”

  “Not really.” I smirked, reaching behind her back and snapping her bra off. “Pretty sure I just made it a real discussion again.”

  “Oh yeah?” She put her hands on her hips, letting me openly gape. “How do you figure?”

  “Now we can discuss how beautiful you are.” I kissed her hard on the mouth and retreated. “How damn sexy I find you.” I sucked her lower lip. “And how excited I am that one day I’ll have little princesses running around that look exactly like you.”

  “Charmer.” Saylor breathed as my hands reached for the last shred of clothing that was separating our bodies from one another.

  Laughing, I picked her up into my arms and carried her to the couch, careful to kiss her lips, plunder the depths of her mouth, and tease until she was ready to either scream at me or hit me.

  I tossed her onto the couch.

  “Gabe…!”

  “Love you.” I hovered over her, kissing every inch of skin, savoring the feel of her warmth against my mouth.

  “I need you,” she moaned.

  My body was already on fire — being with her did that to me, made me want to seriously spend my days having sex and never doing anything else with my life. Ever. But when I brought up that topic to Saylor, she said the only people who made careers out of sex were prostitutes.

  I, of course, pointed out that since we were married it didn’t matter.

  She said if money changed hands, it did.

  With a grin I kissed her neck and finally entered her with excruciating slowness. I would never tire of that feeling — of being one with the person I loved.

  Saylor whimpered as I brought her body to the brink of release, only to slow down again.

  Teasing her, even in intimate moments was my favorite thing in the world.

  “Gabe!” Saylor yelled.

  I chuckled. “Louder?”

  “I—”

  My mouth crushed hers as her body tensed and then went limp against mine.

  Careful not to squash her, I managed to lie next to her.

  “Tell me…” she whispered. “One true thing.”

  “I love you.” I kissed her cheek. “And a lifetime of days like this? Won’t ever be enough.”

  “I like that truth.”

  “Yeah.” I wrapped my arm around her. “I do too. What about you? What’s your truth for the day?”

  Saylor shifted toward me. “Someday, when we do have kids… and we bring a little princess into the world, I think we should name her Kimmy.”

  I couldn’t find my voice. I could only nod as I felt my eyes well with tears. “I think— I think she would have liked that.”

  “Yeah.” Saylor sighed. “Me too.”

  The doorbell rang.

  Panicked, I jolted up and nearly knocked Saylor off the couch.

  “Who is it?” Saylor called in a totally calm voice while I was busy trying to locate articles of clothing. Why was I only finding my socks? How were socks going to cover this up?

  I mean, seriously.

  “Hurry up, guys, it’s freezing!” Lisa shouted.

  “Shit!” I found my pants, only to fall on my ass, because my feet slid on my shirt. I looked at Saylor as the light bulb clicked on in her brain too.

  “Taco Tuesday!” We shouted at the same time.

  “Guys! Come on!” Lisa pounded the door again.

  “Keep your pants on!” I yelled back.

  Saylor sighed and quickly buttoned her jeans.

  I wasn’t as fast.

  I was like a turtle. Ha, that damn nickname wasn’t ever going away.

  Finally, we opened the doors to see Wes, Kiersten, and Lisa waiting.

  Wes took one look at me and burst out laughing. “Shirts on backwards, man. Welcome to matrimony.”

  “Gross.” Lisa side-stepped me.

  As everyone talked at once and piled into the house, I was left staring at the sunset, the same sunset that I’d seen at the end of every day. Last year it had reminded me of loss — and now? It reminded me of life.

  “Hey, you coming?” Kiersten called.

  “Yeah.” Smiling, I closed the door. “I am.”

  Haven’t read enough Wes and Kiersten? You’re in luck! Their novella Fearless releases March 9th! Turn the page to see an excerpt from the book, and be sure to check my website for the release date for Shame, the third book in the Ruin series and Lisa’s story!

  Fearless

  Chapter One

  The human heart beats around one hundred thousand times a day. It pumps over two thousand gallons of blood through over sixty miles of blood vessels in any given twenty-four hour period. The physical greatness would be staggering enough, given those facts. But the emotional capacity? Words can’t explain. Doctors can’t describe why certain parts of your heart react to anger, sadness, joy, and love. Why, when you laugh, your heart laughs with you. When you cry, your heart breaks for you. But the most amazing fact of all? How easily we give our heart away even with the knowledge that in another person’s hands you are the most vulnerable you will ever be.—Wes Michels.

  Wes

  I sat in one of the pool chairs at my house. The mid-afternoon fog gathered around the Sound making it look more magical than eerie. Every time I exhaled, I could see my breath—proof that I was living.

  Such an amazing experience—to know you’re alive.

  My muscles ached and my head felt like it was going to explode. I was still trying to figure out if I liked living in that moment or if I wanted to stick my head in the sand and let out a little cry.

  I was trying to balance wedding planning with Kiersten, drama with Gabe, and spring training with the Seahawks.

  Life was quickly spinning out of control… not in a bad way, but if there was anything I’d learned in my twenty-two years of living, it was that even good things could end up being bad if you didn’t put what was important first.

  And Kiersten?

  She was most important.

  I winced as my muscles debated whether or not they were going to work or cease from functioning and let me fall on my ass.

  “Wes?” Kiersten’s pretty voice floated through the air. The sound of her voice was always like a balm to my soul, it reminded me of the first time my name had the honor of being formed by those beautiful lips. I could be in the worst mood—and just hearing her voice, my name and her voice mixed together, was enough to fix everything.

  Moving slowly because I felt like an old man with a walker, I turned and gave her a bright smile.

  “What’s wrong?” She ran towards me and grabbed my hands. Her blue eyes filled with tears.

  “Why do you assume something’s wrong, baby?”

  Her lower lip quivered. “Your smile’s fake.”

  “Aww…” I pulled her into my arms, knowing that it was going to hurt like hell when she squeezed around my midsection. “I’m just in a bit of pain, that’s all.”

  Her eyebrows furrowed together in concern. “Your chest?”

  “No.” I chuckled stroking her red hair with my fingertips. “My entire body. Those workouts are rough.”

  “Oh.” She sighed in relief, almost melting against me. “So you’re fine? Your heart’s fine? Everything’s fine?”

  “Sweetheart…” I slowly released her and looked into her deep blue eyes, framed by dark lashes and flawless skin, she still took my breath away. “Are we going to have to have another one of those talks where I tell you not to freak out every time I’m doing something other than smiling?”

  Her shoulders sagged. “Probably. It’s just everything with Gabe and Saylor—it just reminds me of last year and… I don’t know. It’s too close to home, you know?”

  “Yeah.” I sat back on the chair, pulling her down with me until she sat in my lap. “I know.” My hands instinctively dug into
her red hair, my fingers twisting her silky locks. Each strand had a mind of its own as it wrapped around and slid through between two fingers, only for me to grab another piece and repeat the process. Each touch of her hair shot an obsessive need to have her—straight through me.

  With a groan, she laid against my chest. “It’s kind of cold out here. What were you doing anyways?”

  I swallowed the panic and told myself that being nervous was ridiculous. Kiersten had seen me at my best and my worst. She could take anything.

  “Remember last year? When I told you I wanted to marry you a year after I woke up from surgery?”

  She tensed in my arms. “Yeah.”

  “So…I don’t want to do that anymore.”

  Kiersten immediately started fidgeting with her hands. “Wes—”

  “I can’t wait.” I stopped her from pulling completely away from me. “If I have to wait one more week I’m seriously going to lose my mind.” I kissed her exposed neck and sighed against it, my body finally relaxing now that I was in her arms. “I want to get married now.”

  “But—”

  “I lied. I wanted to be married the day you said yes.”

  “But—”

  “I’ve spent my entire life being patient, Kiersten. I’ve spent my life waiting. Waiting to live, waiting to die, waiting to hear good news, waiting to hear bad news. And for once, I really, really, want to be selfish and screw the whole waiting process. I want you. I want you right now. I want you in every way a man could want a woman. I want you every second of every day. I want to give you my name. I want to live with you. I want to take care of you. I want to have kids with you. I want to massage your feet after a hard day. I want to hug you when you’re sad. I want to hold your hand when you’re sick. I want to hold you in my arms and never let go—even waking up in the morning with our bodies intertwined, won’t be enough for me. Breathing your air destroys me because I can taste you in everything—even when your lips aren’t anywhere near mine—damn, I can taste them, I taste you. I want you so deeply etched in my soul that I don’t know where I end and you begin. So, Kiersten, I’m going to pull the whole “I was dying and this is my dying wish card”—because every day I’m not with you. Every day that goes by when I don’t get to share every single moment with you…is like waiting to die all over again. So, will you marry me? Not in another eight months—will you marry me….now?”