Mindspeak

  “Your mom said you got bad news tonight. That you’d be on board with The Program once you processed that news.” I scooted closer to him and slid my fingers under his chin. I lifted, forcing him to look at me. “Does the bad news have anything to do with Addison?”

  Jack’s eyes glassed over, but almost as quickly, he blinked the moisture away. “How do you know about her?”

  “I saw you with her. At the hospital today.” I looked at my watch. 11:17. “I was there. Seth told me about her accident and her injuries.” I squeezed his hand tighter. “Why are you telling me to run when you think I could help her? Heal her even?”

  He ran his fingers down my face. “I’m scared, Lexi. I’ve seen your nosebleeds. I’ve practically felt your headaches each time I’ve taken your pain away. I know how sick I get when I heal a simple broken arm. I don’t want to know what kind of pain and illness you’ll suffer after healing something as severe as brain damage. I don’t want this for you. Not anymore.”

  He took a deep breath and continued. “When I first met you, I thought I could convince you that our genetic makeup was a good thing. That we could use what Sandra did to us for good, but I realize now that I’m the naïve one. You have to go. I won’t be responsible for forcing you to do something that goes against what you have grown to believe. And I don’t want anything happening to you.”

  Jack’s eyes pleaded with me. My heart broke at the prospect of leaving him behind to bear the consequences of Sandra’s experiment alone. “Come with me. Please, Jack. I can’t do this alone.”

  He grabbed one of my hands and cradled it in his. “I can’t,” he whispered. “I promised Cathy.”

  “What do you mean? You don’t owe her anything.”

  “Yes, I do. They planned to take Addison off life support Sunday unless I agreed to stay here at Wellington. I owe Addison. There has to be another way to heal her.”

  Cathy DeWeese was a monster. “Then I’ll stay, too. I’ll do this for you. I’ll heal Addison, then we’ll both run. Together.” What was I saying? Could I do this and live with the consequences? What if I failed and did Addison more harm?

  “No!” He ran a hand through his hair. “Don’t you get it? I don’t want you to stay. You can’t heal Addison at the cost of your own life.”

  “What are you saying?” I didn’t understand. “Healing someone might make me sick, but I’ll get over it. Like you do.”

  “I almost died when I healed too much too fast. I refuse to take that chance with you.” The anguish on Jack’s face about did me in.

  “Whether I stay or not, heal or not, is my choice.”

  “Yes it is,” he breathed. “But you’d be making a mistake on both accounts.”

  “Your mom thinks I’ll stay and, in her words, ‘fall in line’ because…” Heat crept across my face.

  “Of me.”

  Yes, because of you. I wasn’t sure Cathy was wrong.

  I love hearing your voice inside my head. You and I are connected in a way that we can never share with Cathy or anyone. They would use it against us.

  They already are. I leaned my forehead against his.

  We stayed there for several minutes. There had to be a way out for both of us.

  “Do you have a set of all this?” I gestured to the documents between us.

  “Yes. My father made a set for us both.”

  “Your father?”

  “Yes. I don’t fully understand it all, but apparently, he had no idea that Cathy was involved with The Program until recently. Your dad brought much of this to light, and he’s had his investigator looking into Cathy’s background.”

  Suddenly, a light flashed over us. We jerked our heads, looked out the window in the direction of moving lights. Flashlights.

  “Get down,” Jack pushed my shoulder. We stretched our legs out and lay flat. Jack handed me the corner of a blanket. “Here, take this.”

  We shook out the dark-colored blanket, spreading it so that it covered our bodies.

  Both of us fought to breathe shallow and remain still. Nightwatchmen, you think?

  Jack curled his fingers around my hand. Yes.

  You think they’re looking for us?

  I don’t know. Jack rubbed his thumb back and forth across my hand.

  Jack, I’m scared. The guard in front of the dorm freaked me out earlier. All I could think about was getting to you.

  Minutes passed. Jack peeked from beneath the blanket. After he sat up, he lifted the blanket off me. “Whoever it was is gone.” He lay back down on his side, facing me. He cupped my cheek with his. “I only want you safe. And happy.”

  I just want you. I swallowed the lump in my throat.

  “How did you find out about Addison?”

  “Marci texted me Sandra’s last known address. It was at the hospital. I was looking for her when I saw you sitting by Addison’s bed. Seth stopped me before I found Sandra.”

  “I’ve never met Sandra. Seth is very protective of his sister. He has security in place and receives a text or page anytime someone asks about her.”

  That explained why Seth found me before I found Sandra at the hospital. Why the precautions? I thought back to my conversation with John DeWeese. How Dad discovered she was involved with the IIA. “Why did your father have documents made for us? Why is he willing to help me?”

  “I think he was living in some sort of denial up until he saw your picture. He thought all of this had just gone away. Then he discovered you. When he saw Peter Roslin for the first time in eighteen years, he knew he had to tell me the truth. The whole truth.”

  I wished someone had thought to tell me the whole truth before now. “So what does he hope will happen now?”

  “I think he wants to honor your dad’s wishes and send you away from here. He’d like your dad’s journals though. He thinks your dad was trying to get the truth out before he was killed.”

  I sat up suddenly. “Crap, that reminds me. I think I know where the journals might be.” I dug in my bag and pulled out the puzzle box. “I think the answer is hidden in here somehow.”

  I showed Jack how one compartment opened. He took the box, twisted and turned it several times looking for another compartment. Finally, I grabbed the box and slammed it into the sidewall of the vehicle, splitting the wood in several places.

  Out fell two small pieces of paper, rolled into tiny cylinders. One with a string of letters, numbers, and symbols—a password. The other—keystrokes: Ctrl + Alt + *.

  “Does this make sense to you?” Jack asked.

  “I think so. But I won’t know without a computer.” I glanced at Jack. For the first time all night, he didn’t look fearful or lost, but more… hopeful.

  If I could find Dad’s journals, maybe I’d find more information about The Program, Sandra, and why Dad was going to remove me from Wellington before I ever started The Program.

  I knew one thing for sure. I would not be controlled by Cathy DeWeese.

  “We can’t go back to the dorms tonight. We have to assume they think we’re there, and not give security any reason to suspect otherwise.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “So, we’re going to sleep… where? Here?” I was suddenly shy.

  The corners of his lips lifted in a slight grin. “Yes. Don’t get any ideas. I’m a man of virtue.”

  I giggled.

  Just like that, Jack’s grin evaporated, and his expression looked more serious. Thank you.

  For what? I cocked my head.

  For laughing in spite of all that I’ve told you tonight. It helps.

  I smiled. Some really smart guy once told me that if I couldn’t laugh through some of this shit, I’d cry.

  “Let’s get some sleep,” he said.

  I nodded, then turned and lay, facing away from Jack. He pulled me closer to his body—my back to his chest—and held me. His palm pressed flat against my stomach. His fingers eased just beneath the hem of my shirt, rubbing bare skin. I’m really going to miss you.

  I
closed my eyes, squeezing them until a single tear leaked out the side.

  ~~~~

  A loud noise startled me awake.

  My eyes sprang open. Where was I?

  Seth’s truck. I lay still. Waiting for the mystery sound to happen again.

  Jack had a death grip on my waist. I placed my hand over his. His skin was warm and soft.

  Then I heard it again. At first, I thought it was the familiar sound of the flick of a lighter, but this sound was different. It didn’t sound nearly as loud as when I was still asleep.

  Was I awake now, or was I dreaming?

  I gently removed Jack’s arm and sat up. The windows of the SUV were fogged up. But through the fog I saw a soft glow. And then I didn’t.

  Then it was there again. Each time I heard a click, I saw orange light. Someone played with what looked like fire outside the window.

  Jack’s breathing remained constant. I tried to match his even breathing to keep from waking him.

  Come on out Lexi. I have something to show you. You need to know the truth.

  Truth. I knew that voice. Who was it? Definitely a boy. The window glowed orange again, like something was on fire outside, and I thought of Dad. And the explosion.

  Jack rolled over in his sleep. His face was so peaceful there in the dark. I thought of all that he’d brought me last night—the passport, money, all the documents I needed to go to college and fade into a normal college kid’s life.

  Oh, how I wanted to do exactly that. Escape the messed up life I had here at Wellington and run from whatever Cathy and Dr. Wellington had planned.

  I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. My lips lingered a few seconds while I memorized his scent. Whatever happens, remember, I did it all for you.

  Grabbing my backpack, I climbed over the seat and out the door.

  Chapter Thirty

  I followed the figure through the dark, away from the parking lot. He clicked a flashlight on and off, producing the same clicking sound that woke me moments before.

  The cool moisture of the morning dew evaporated, lifting with it the smells of grass and pavement. The soft glow of sunshine appeared on the horizon just beyond the administration buildings. It was early. The time of day I usually got up.

  But why? I was supposed to be somewhere else. Where?

  Why couldn’t I see this boy’s face? “Hey!” I reached for him, but missed. “Where are we going?” Why was I following him? He promised truth.

  We followed the sidewalk around the side of the library and approached a building I knew well. The infirmary. Was I sick? I touched my fingers to my temple. My head didn’t hurt. Though my mind seemed a little fuzzy.

  I wiggled my fingers in front of my face. My arm wasn’t broken.

  I stopped walking, considered a broken arm, and thought of Jack.

  Jack had fixed my arm.

  I raised my head and stared at the figure in front of me. “Come on Lexi. Just a little further. I can answer all of your questions.”

  “Who are you?”

  He tilted his head to one side. “You know who I am. I’m your friend.”

  Lexi! Where are you? Another voice entered my head.

  Jack? I’m in front of the infirmary with… my friend. Jack, I think something’s wrong. My stomach tightened. I stared at the figure. His eyes came into focus, then disappeared again. He was supposed to give me truth. That’s why I was here.

  Lexi, listen to me. Someone’s inside your head. You need to wake up. Block them out. Block them out, Lexi. Jack sounded panicked.

  Block them out? I can do that. Jack taught me how. I pushed back along the edges of my mind. Reality swirled with my dreams and mixed with my nightmares.

  Lexi, can you still hear me? I’m coming.

  The figure reached for me. My internal alarm sounded, and a small voice told me not to let him touch me. I jumped back and rubbed my arms from my elbows to my shoulders in a hug. “Who are you?”

  “I just want to show you the truth. I know you have a power they want. You could cure your grandmother and help so many others in this world. Take away so much pain on this earth. Wouldn’t you like that? Your grandmother would recognize you, and she would no longer feel any pain.”

  “I’d like that,” I whispered.

  “Jack wants that, too, Lexi.”

  “Jack?”

  “You and he are a team. Together, you could heal and comfort. You’d live a life of wealth and happily-ever-after.”

  “I don’t care about wealth.”

  “But you love your grandmother. You don’t want to see her hurt, do you?”

  “Of course not.” Was he threatening me?

  “And you love Jack.” I nodded. I did love him. “And Jack loves you. He needs you, Lexi. That little girl will die without you. Accept who you are, and you’ll be with Jack forever.”

  “But I don’t know if I can help Addison.”

  “Of course you can. You were created to do so. Jack will try to push you away, but you were made to help people just like Addison and your grandmother. Don’t let Jack send you away. He doesn’t have that right.”

  I wanted to help others, didn’t I? That’s why I wanted to become a doctor.

  My gram had suffered from Alzheimer’s for the past six years. She’d stopped recognizing me altogether five years ago. Oh, what I would give for even one more conversation with her. To let her know I loved her and that I would live my life to honor her and Dad. To take her pain away.

  Would that be wrong? I was so confused. Would that infringe on God’s will?

  “Lexi!” I felt pressure on both arms. My head bobbled back and forth. Someone shook me, interrupting me from my thoughts. “Lexi, wake up.”

  The figure disappeared and in his place was Jack. “Jack?”

  “It happened again. You were sleepwalking.”

  I looked around. “But someone was here with me.”

  “No one was here.”

  “But…” I stared at the intensity of Jack’s blue eyes.

  “What did this person say?” Jack’s hands continued to rub my arms.

  “He said that I needed to accept who I was.” I searched Jack’s face for the guidance I needed, but he didn’t have the answers. Only I could decide what to do next. I knew exactly what that was.

  He smoothed the hair on either side of my head. “You said it was a man?”

  I tried to picture the figure. “I think so. I thought I recognized the voice and the eyes, but…” I gave my head a little shake. “Everything’s so unclear.”

  Jack gazed intently at me. “You have to go.” He reached in the satchel draped across his body and thrust a small bag into my chest, forcing me to take hold. “Take these documents. Keep them close. And tell no one.”

  “Jack, no. I can’t run. And there’s no way I’m leaving without telling Danielle.”

  “You have to. What can I do to make you understand?” He ran his hands through his hair, squeezing his eyes tight. When his eyes returned to me, he spoke in a low, husky voice. “Lexi, someone has already tried to kill you twice. If you refuse to do what they want, they’ll try again. And if they succeed…” His voice cracked. He slid his hand around me, settled it into the small of my back, and brought my body flush with his. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.” He kissed the top of my head.

  “If that’s true, how can you push me away?” I thought of the figure’s words, “Don’t let Jack send you away.”

  He released me, held me at arms’ length. “You think I’d put you in danger just to keep you close? That would make me one selfish jerk.”

  I knew in that moment what I had to do. “What now?” I asked.

  He glanced at his watch. “You have practice. You’ll only be a few minutes late, but you better hurry.”

  I raised a brow. “You want me to go to practice?”

  “I want you to go about business as usual. Act normal.”

  “Normal,” I repeated, narrowing
my gaze. The last person who instructed me to go about my routine died in a car explosion.

  “Yes, and I’ll see you at the gala tonight.”

  “Tonight? And that’s it?” Dread surged through my voice. “You’ll see me at the gala, and then send me on my merry way?”

  “This is for your own good, Lexi. I won’t let them get to you.” He pushed a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “I’ll do whatever it takes.”

  Uninvited tears surfaced. This was what I had wanted, right? To get away from this school. To live a normal life. Become a doctor and help people with the love, kindness and the type of medical care they teach in medical schools.

  I didn’t want the kind of life Dad had. The kind that played with human life by trial and error. Often error.

  Jack’s eyes stared into mine, looking for reassurance that I’d do what he proposed.

  “I’ll see you tonight,” I said, deflated.

  The back of his hand brushed my cheek. He slid his hand around to the back of my neck and leaned in. He tilted his head. His lips touched mine softly at first then he pressed harder, taking from me like it was his last chance. I felt the effects of the kiss everywhere. A surge of energy started at his touch to my neck and traveled all the way to my toes.

  When he released me, he kept eye contact and his lips curled into a slow smile. “We both know Dani will ask, so I’d like to know if you’ll be my date tonight?”

  A tear streamed down my face. Jack wiped it away with his thumb. I nodded. Anything else and I’d lose the courage to do what I had to do next.

  With another quick kiss, Jack turned and walked off toward the boys’ dorms. I took off in the direction of the aquatic center.

  Before I entered the building, I pulled out my cell phone and called Seth. “It’s time I learned how this power of mine works… I’ll figure out how to get in and out of Wellington unnoticed. Just come get me.”

  Chapter Thirty-One

  “How exactly does the ability work?” I asked.

  Gram sat up in her wheelchair knitting by the window. Seth stood by the door while I knelt beside her. She smiled, giving me that look I remembered getting every day after school when I was younger.

  I placed a hand on her forearm.