Fusion

  “Listen, I know you’re excited to see your brother. Alive,” she added, smirking back at me. “But he’s in something of a fragile state right now, so bear hugs, rough housing, or anything else of a physical nature you knuckle heads participate in at every chance needs to be sidelined.”

  “Patrick. Fragile?” Joseph said, looking at me, his forehead creasing. “How bad? How long?”

  Bryn cleared her throat, glancing up at William.

  “I’ll speak up here and confess I will be in something of a somewhat fragile state for a while since I’m a‌…‌” I rubbed the back of my neck, not sure how to lay this out there. Sugar coating was never my thing and wasn’t ever going to be; I laid it all out there.

  Lifting a shoulder, I looked each member of my family in the eyes. “Since I’m a Mortal.”

  Joseph laughed, William following right behind.

  When I didn’t join in, they both stopped mid-note.

  The silence that ensued made me come close to squirming for the first time.

  “You’re Mortal.” Father was the first one to speak, as expected, and neither his voice nor his face gave away any emotion. He could be epically pissed or totally copacetic with the whole thing.

  “So they tell me,” I said, lifting my arms and doing a spin for everyone.

  “Why?” Another emotionless question from Chancellor Hayward.

  Wait, I wasn’t Immortal any more. He didn’t have anything to be Chancellor of over me. I could have danced a jig if everyone wasn’t still staring at me like I was a leper.

  “I saw the opportunity and I took it,” I answered, leaving Emma out of it. For now. My guess is my family already knew why, but I didn’t want five sets of eyes to turn in accusation on her the moment they saw her. They had to know this was my decision. My own.

  “How?” Father asked, crossing his arms and studying the ground. Okay, he was pissed. He was actually having to work to stay composed.

  I didn’t want to rat Bryn out, but really, the answer should be glaringly obvious. I was dying. Almost gonezo. Everyone left. Bryn stayed behind. I was Mortal when they came back.

  A should lead to B should lead to Bryn.

  Scratching the back of my head, I studied the ceiling. “A miracle?”

  Weak, Hayward.

  “I did it,” Bryn said, her voice soft as she shouldered closer to me. “I changed him.”

  The heads that were trained on me snapped a foot to the right, landing on her. She didn’t even squirm as we met another round of silence.

  “You performed an unauthorized reversal on a member of my Alliance?” Father’s eyes lifted, narrowing in on Bryn.

  Now she squirmed.

  William came forward, dropping an arm around her waist and lining up with the two of us.

  One down, five more to go.

  “Yeah. That member of your Alliance also happens to be your son,” I said, not disguising my sarcasm. “And that member of your Alliance would have died had Bryn not agreed after copious amounts of pleading, begging, and sobbing to reverse me.” I crossed my arms, looking at her from the side. She was already stronger with William beside her. “So take out whatever anger you have on me.”

  Father’s eyes closed as he rubbed a hand over his eyes. “Son,” he began, “I’m not angry with anyone. I’m sad.” He paused, his jaw tightening. “I’m mourning the son I will one day lose. Forgive me for needing more than a few minutes to get past this.”

  Not pissed. Sad. Mourning, even.

  It turned out my father could still, after generations, surprise me.

  “I think we all know, whether I was Immortal or Mortal, you would have one day lost me,” I said as Joseph, in all his battered glory, sauntered up to me, grinning like the fool he was. “At least on this side of the finite, my perception of my invincibility will taper down a few notches, so I might actually live to die of natural causes.”

  Looping an arm around my neck, Joseph pulled me to him carefully. It was the first time ever Joseph was stronger than me.

  “Come here,” he said, patting me on the back, his embrace so careful you would think he was handling a house of cards.

  “Yeah,” I said, thumping his back. It was hard and unforgiving as steel. Man, is that what I’d been like? “Me too, little brother,” I said, filling in the silent blanks.

  “You’re madder than a hatter, but I love you, too,” he replied, his eyes glassy when he pulled back. Emotional sap.

  After Joseph, William pulled me tight, being less careful because he knew. He got it. Just because I was the resident weakling now didn’t mean I wanted to be treated like it. From there, I lost track of who and how long each of my family members pulled me to them, whispering and weeping words I wasn’t able or ready to process yet.

  I still hadn’t gotten used to the idea I couldn’t see more than fifty feet before things started to blur.

  “So,” Father turned to Bryn after letting me go, his face lining, “you were able to manage a successful reversal on the first try. Putting aside the fact that your guinea pig was my son, I’m going to admit that is exceptionally impressive.”

  “I wasn’t a guinea‌—‌” I started, but Bryn flashed her hand in front of me.

  “Yes. I nailed it on the first try,” she said, meeting Father’s gaze. Bryn was never exactly the pinnacle of self-confidence, so to see her now, putting on her big confident girl panties, had me feeling like a proud guinea pig. “I single handedly undertook the first successful reversal in the history of Immortality. And, for the books,”‌—‌she glanced my way, tilting her chin in acknowledgment‌—‌”it is also the last. I will never do that again. So no one had better ask.”

  William’s face was as blank with shock as mine was, as Father’s was. Well, as everyone’s was.

  Bryn “No Nonsense” Hayward.

  Finally.

  Father nodded, looking one part disappointed to two parts proud. “Understood.”

  Who knows what else, if anything else, was said because, despite being unable to hear her running towards me from a half a mile away, or catch the scent of her on the air, or see her coming through that blackest of black tunnels, I could sense her.

  In that place that we always took with us, both in Mortality and Immortality. That place that could feel her no matter if I was blind and deaf and toeing the line of death.

  Spinning around, I weaved through my family, jogging towards the tunnel.

  “What?” Nathanial shouted, throwing his hands up in the air. “You all have been down here having a family powwow while we sat on our asses the better part of an hour waiting for you fools? Last time I do a favor for you, brother,” he shouted as I ran past him.

  “Patrick’s a Mortal, you insensitive ass!” Cora shouted behind me. “We were kind of indisposed. Sorry we couldn’t attend to you like the baby you are.”

  Nathanial froze in place, gaping at me.

  I flashed him a grin and a wink before closing the last few feet between Emma and myself. I didn’t have to worry about being careful with her anymore. I threw myself against her, pulling her into my arms and swinging her around until I was certain I was going to keel over from being dizzy.

  “What’s this about you being Mortal?” she whispered into my ear.

  “Yeah. Sorry about that,” I said, not letting her go. “I’m going to get old. Ugly, possibly. Hairy, pasty, and saggy. But when we’re ancient and you’re trying not to gag into your fiber when you look at me across the table, just remember I did it all for you, baby. Well, and remember what a fine piece of ass I used to be.”

  She laughed softly, tucking her face into my neck.

  “Why?”

  “For you,” I replied. “Obviously.”

  “I’m not sure whether to kiss you or slap you.”

  I was sure.

  “Then why don’t you just go with the whole kissing me thing then?”

  The tip of her nose skimmed across my cheek until her mouth was just above mine. En
ough stalling. Not enough kissing.

  I crushed my mouth into hers, not able to control what I was doing. There was urgency and there was passion, but there was also patience and restraint. As her hands weaved through my hair, kissing me back so hard I was certain I was thirty seconds away from passing out due to oxygen deprivation, I knew this wasn’t only the best kiss I’d ever experienced, but a first kiss. The handful of girls I’d kissed my first go at Mortality, and the countless slew of girls I’d kissed my way through Immortality, faded away‌—‌carried off by the wind. It was freeing in a way I couldn’t have imagined.

  Only because I knew the black and white static trickling into my peripheral vision was the first stage of fainting, I broke away from the kiss of my life.

  “Are you okay?” we said in unison after I set her back down, both of us as breathless as the other.

  I didn’t answer, waiting for hers.

  She nodded. “I’m good. Great, now,” she said, lifting her hand and running it down my cheek. Her touch, the simple skimming of a hand down my flesh, confirmed just how right the decision I’d made was. “You?”

  “Em,” I said, folding my hand over hers, “I’ve never been better.”

  The skin between her brows creased as she studied me, investigating my face and body for the signs of damage that were there earlier. “I thought I’d lost you,” she said finally, swallowing hard.

  “You couldn’t lose me if you wanted to,” I replied, stepping closer. I didn’t care that my family was an audience to this; I hardly even realized they were there.

  “No,” she said, smiling, “I doubt I could.”

  “You couldn’t.”

  “Your eyes,” she said, fanning her finger through my eyelashes. “They’re green. Kind of like mine.”

  I’d forgotten the color of the eyes I’d been born with. Green like the grass of Ireland my mother had referenced when she spoke of all her children’s eyes.

  “Yeah. Kind of like yours.”

  Her smile curved higher. “So, bad guys are taken care of. You’re out of prison‌—‌for now,” she said, nipping the corner of her lip. “What’s next?”

  Just the segue I needed.

  “Marriage,” I said immediately. “And babies. Lots and lots of babies.”

  Her face went a shade lighter, but other than that, there were no other signs of shock or doubt on her face. “Is that all?” she said, quirking a brow.

  “Not exactly,” I said, tilting my mouth into her ear, “but I’d be happy to go over the rest of what I’ve got in mind with you later. When we’re alone.” I kissed the skin just below her ear before leaning back.

  She was giving me the sexiest combination of a smirk and a smile. “Was that your way of asking me to marry you?”

  “Damn straight it was,” I replied.

  She shook her head, smiling at the ground. “Of course it was.”

  “Was that your way of saying yes?”

  She stilled, pausing. I had one moment of panic before she lifted her eyes into mine. The eyes that were alive again.

  “Damn straight it was.”

  EPILOGUE

  When you can count the number of decades you have left on your hands, one goes by fast. Too fast.

  When you realize that one day you’ll have to leave the ones you love most behind, you love them with precision and intention.

  When eternity is no longer a reality, life is that much more beautiful.

  “Hey, old man!” the youngest Hayward brother called out. “You going to rub some ointment into your aching bones or are you going to play?”

  I popped up from the porch swing, keeping my preferred reply to myself as I knew young ears were close by.

  “I just wanted to give you all a chance to warm up before I came out and made you suffer,” I called back, hopping down the front porch stairs. Dodging an obstacle course of lawn toys, a precariously positioned pair of tiny roller skates, and one tricycle laying on its side, I loped over to the patch of lawn where my brothers had erected a volleyball net.

  “Patrick!” Joseph hollered from the other side of the net. “Think fast!”

  I snatched the volleyball flying at my head out of the air. Popping my face to the side of it, I arched a brow at Joseph.

  “The cat-like reflexes are strong with this one,” he said, making a face.

  “That’s because daddy is like a magical fairy prince,” the white haired girl with Emma’s unnaturally large eyes said from atop her Uncle William’s shoulders.

  All three of my brothers laughed. “Magical fairy indeed, Julia,” Uncle Nathanial said in between his laughter.

  I smiled at my second born, blowing her a kiss and flapping my arms the rest of the way into the court.

  “What do you think, Gray?” I said, ruffling my son’s hair. My first born, who was almost six years old, on the outside looked like his mama, but his insides were all his daddy. “You think we can take them all?

  Gray studied the court on the other side of the net, his brows drawn together, before the exact smile that was on my face formed. “We can take them.”

  “Your son’s lack of confidence is just sad,” Joseph said, winking at Gray. “Your ball, buddy.”

  I held my hand out for him to high five as he passed by, walking ceremoniously back to the service line.

  “Yay, Gray!” Julia cheered from across the net, clapping her tiny hands before adjusting the crown of wildflowers she’d made with Aunt Bryn earlier. “Go, Gray!”

  “Ready?” he asked, in position as he looked over at me.

  I tried not to smile my amusement. My little man, acting like this impromptu game of yard volleyball was the game of the year. “Show ‘em what you got, son.”

  Inhaling, he lowered his shoulders before launching the ball over the net.

  I hooted over his serve as my three brothers put on a good show on the other side of the net, tripping, fumbling, and bumping the ball back and forth. Finally, Nathanial “missed” the ball and the point was ours.

  “The boy’s a volleyball prodigy,” Nathanial said, grinning across the net at Gray, whose face was shining from his smile.

  “Hey, volleyball players!” Julia, the original, purple boot wearing one, called out, “Time to refuel. Dinner’s on and I’ve been instructed to warn you if you’re not at the table in two minutes, there might not be anything left. Four hungry Scarlett brothers are circling the table like a flock of vultures as we speak.”

  “Thanks, Jules!” I replied, grabbing Gray and tossing him over my shoulder.

  “Oh, and Namesake Number One and Namesake Number Two?” She paused inside the door, smiling between Julia and Gray. “Auntie Abigail said she made you each something special.” Bouncing her brows, she disappeared back inside.

  “Honey rolls!” they both cried out in unison, scrambling down from William’s and my shoulders.

  “Come on, Julia!” Gray called for his sister once he was on the ground, holding out his hand for her. Holding her two sizes too big princess dress, she adjusted her crown and ran as fast as her three year old legs would carry her.

  Running by me, she suddenly paused and turned. Her smile was all teeth as she threw herself at my leg, wrapping both arms around it. “I love you, daddy.”

  The other thing about Mortality? It choked me up a lot more than Immortality had.

  Clearing my throat, I brushed her hair back from her face. “Love you too, baby girl.”

  As quickly as she’d latched onto me, she unlatched, completing the journey towards her brother, who was still waiting patiently.

  “Make sure you two wash your hands before you sit down,” I called after them as Gray held her hand up the stairs.

  “Okay, dad,” he called back, opening the door for his sister.

  “You want us to retrieve your cane for you, old man?” Nathanial said, coming up beside me.

  I matched his smirk with one of my own.

  “Bite me.”

  “I’m going to g
et some of that grub before you get your greedy hands on it,” he said, shouldering by me. “See you inside.”

  “He’s just jealous because you’ve aged ten years and you’re still better looking than him,” Joseph said, spinning the ball on his index finger.

  “Far better looking,” I clarified.

  “Yeah, yeah. Let’s have this same conversation in twenty years and see if you can say the same,” he said, firing the ball at me. I snapped it out of the air like it was second nature. I might not be Immortal any more, but I was still pretty bad ass.

  “Just because, for the first time ever, you ugly brutes will one day be better looking than me doesn’t mean you have to rub it in,” I said, slapping Joseph’s back as he passed by. “That day will only come when I’ve been six feet under for a good six years.”

  Joseph chuckled his way inside the house, shaking his head.

  “After you,” William said, shouldering up beside me, “Dr. Hayward.”

  I slid him a smile from the side. Damn doctors in this family. It was like we were cursed with the M.D. plague. After some impressive papers and documents that might not be exactly on the up and up were created, I enrolled back in school after finishing out my prison sentence which, thanks to a talented Mindtrapper, not a single soul recalled me missing from prison for that half a day when I’d gone looking for Emma and Joseph. And, because getting my bachelor’s wasn’t enough, I went all the way. Patrick Hayward, M.D.

  Yeah, I hadn’t seen that one coming either.

  Emma’d gotten her teaching degree and juggled thirty first graders for a few years while I finished med school before Gray was born. After that, she still taught, just not in the typical classroom environment. I learned something new from my wife of almost ten years on a daily basis.

  “I’ll meet you inside,” I answered, nudging my brother.

  William nodded his acknowledgment, making his way inside. He got it when I wanted, or when I needed, to be alone. I’d found in Mortality, life became so busy, too much of it passed me by without taking the time to really revel in the moment. To reflect on the beauty of the finite.

  Just as he was stepping inside, William glanced back at me. He was still smiling, but it was his eyes that gave him away. They were just enough sad to give away what he was thinking. They were thinking of goodbye.