Surrender to Me
Page 41
It was going to tear his fucking heart out.
He had no illusions; he’d never be the same. He’d be every inch the miserable bastard his father had been for the last fifteen lonely years, that Logan was now. Hunter had always sworn he’d do whatever it took to hang on to the one woman meant for him.
Goddamn it, in a handful of hours he’d have no choice but to let her go.
Hunter crossed his arms over his chest, restraining the urge to embrace Kata, stroke her tempting flesh—and never stop. “First, if you go home, you’re not only putting yourself in danger, but your family, too. You might not know everything about this asshole threatening you, but he knows you. Why wouldn’t he come after those you love?”
Kata’s stubborn chin rose, but she nodded. Though she didn’t want to, she saw his point. Now he had to put all his cards on the table, even though he had the losing hand.
“I have a proposition, honey: Today, I’ll do whatever it takes to neutralize the threat against you. Tomorrow, you’ll be free in every way. ” He clenched his fists. “I’ll sign the fucking divorce papers. ”
As soon as he choked out the words, Hunter wished he could take them back. For him, she was it—had been since the moment he laid eyes on her. He wished he could make her understand, but unless she came to love him in return, accept his needs and her own, they were doomed.
Surprise flashed across her face, along with something else—regret, maybe . . . or was that his own wishful thinking?
She smoothed out her expression. “T-thank you for finally being reasonable. ”
Reasonable? In five seconds, she wouldn’t think so. “I’ll do that, if you spend tonight with me. ”
Chapter Eighteen
HE was going to sign the papers? Kata swallowed as conflicting emotions rushed her. She expected relief. After all, the emotional rollercoaster ride she’d been on the past few days was ending. Instead, dismay crashed through her. After tonight, she’d probably never see Hunter again. She blinked back blindsiding tears that burned like acid. Her heart felt as though it were bleeding out of her chest.
Was she crazy? She’d demanded this divorce. The minute Hunter relented, some twisted part of her wanted to stay with him?
God, she’d fallen in love with him.
Kata closed her eyes. Fine freaking time to realize it.
“Did you hear me?” He leaned against the doorframe, his gaze hot on her body.
He was cocky, challenging. Damn it, it didn’t seem like his heart was breaking. He loved her so much that he was throwing in the towel after a mere four days? After he got another piece of ass and stole another bit of her soul, of course. Then he’d let her go.
Or maybe he’d finally realized they were a losing bet.
“Yes. ” She cleared her suddenly tight throat. “Spend tonight with you, and you’ll sign the papers. ”
Even saying those words felt like a hot knife carving a jagged hole in her chest. But Hunter wasn’t going to change. His dominance disturbed her. That his parents had split up over his father’s controlling nature didn’t bode well. Spending the day with Caleb had proven that leopard wasn’t going to change his spots. And Logan seemed made from the same mold, if the demanding, growled phone calls she’d overheard with his BDSM bunnies were any indication. Perhaps she was too sensitive, but she’d rather roll over and die than let any man have the kind of dominion over her that Gordon held over Mamá.
She and Hunter had shared the best sex of her life. Kata always knew that she’d fall for someone who had a core of honor, straight-up honesty, a decisive bent. Dominance aside, Hunter was everything she could want in a man. It made sense that she had feelings for him. But she’d never be the kind of woman he needed. And she’d ultimately make him miserable.
She had to find the strength to let go before they hurt one another any more.
Hunter speared her with a haunting blue stare. “And?”
“I’ll do it. ” Her voice was scratchy, thin. “What about the killer?”
“I have a plan. Jack and Deke are helping. By morning, everything should be over. ”
In that, she trusted him completely. Leaping into a marriage with Hunter might be as scary as jumping off a cliff, but she knew that he’d never let anything or anyone hurt her. And whatever else had happened between them, she probably owed him her life. “Thank you. I don’t know how you accomplished it, but I’m very grateful. ”
“I’ll explain once it’s all settled. ”
That rankled a bit, but Kata nodded. That was Hunter’s way. She couldn’t change him, but she wanted to touch him, cup his cheek, plant a soft kiss on his mouth. It was too much like something a woman in love would do, so she did nothing. “Thanks. ”
“You’re welcome. Be ready at five, suitcase packed. The Colonel and Logan have agreed to stay with your mother. I’ll get Dad to back off. But you can be assured that she’s in good hands. Tomorrow, you’re both free. ” He paused, glanced down at her lacy blue underwear. “But tonight . . . no panties. ”
With that, he turned and left, closing the door behind him with a quiet click.
Kata stared at the solid oak portal between them. That was it? No kiss, no embrace? She’d certainly wanted it—even though tonight was good-bye.
A fresh wave of desolation overcame her, leaving her bereft in its wake. Hunter seemed all but done with her.
Kata frowned at her reflection in the lightly steamed mirror, then closed her eyes against the crush of emotion weighing on her. Everything inside her resisted ending this. How had Hunter ingrained himself in her heart so quickly that she suddenly wasn’t sure how she’d live without him?
Kata shook her head. She’d lived without the man for twenty-five years. She’d find a way to manage for the rest of her life. First, she had to focus on making it through tonight. Because Hunter would strip her bare, all the way down to her soul, expose everything she was inside, then take it all. She feared she’d never be the same again.
HUNTER drove across town in silence. Kata wanted to ask where they were going, but his tight-lipped silence didn’t encourage conversation. Wherever they were headed, she knew he would keep her safe.
Kata had no such assurance where her heart was concerned.
Finally, they pulled up in front of a big house as dusk began to fall. Just outside of town, on an isolated lane, the sprawling brick house with its black shutters and large windows beckoned from a long stone walkway bracketed by pairs of towering oak trees, their lofty branches reaching up and over the quaint walk. Flowers abounded in pots here and there. An air of old money and wealthy decadence lingered.
As she exited the truck, Hunter came around and held her door. She noticed another truck, a black one, already against the curb in front of them.
“Is someone else here?”
He closed and locked the truck behind her. “Come with me. ”
“Who lives here?”
“The owner won’t be here tonight. No more questions. ”
He definitely had his Dom face on. The hard edge to his voice and the distance he put between them now tore at her. Fighting it would only hurt more in the long run, but she ached to throw her arms around him, press her lips to his, and ask him to share himself with her.
The way he’d been trying to coax her from the beginning. She winced at the thought.
He took her by the elbow, led her up the stone walkway, reached for the doorknob. And she couldn’t stand the thought that their last night together would be impersonal. As much as he’d pushed and shoved his way into her life, her psyche, and even her heart, the Hunter who stood at her side now was so remote she wanted to scream.
“Wait!” She swallowed down her nerves. “I—I don’t want it like this. You . . . ” She tried to gather her racing thoughts, find the right words. “It’s like you don’t like me, even want me, anymore. If that’s the case—”
Kata didn’t even finish the sentence before
Hunter dragged her closer and captured her mouth with his own, fists in her hair, lips tangling with hers, heart racing against her own. He urged her open and dove in. The kiss turned instantly deep. Intimate. He swirled his tongue around her own as if he planned to stay all night. With a devouring pace, he engulfed her senses, silencing her worries. Kata pressed to him, curled her arms around his neck, losing herself in Hunter’s familiar flavor. God, she never wanted the kiss to end.
As she moaned, he pulled away, his mouth pressed into a grim line. “I want you. Never doubt that. Come inside. ”
He opened the front door, and Kata had the impression of warm-toned walls, tall ceilings, lots of Tuscan details before he hustled her down a long hall. She bit back questions. He’d reveal to her his intentions when he was ready. As much as she hated to admit it, he knew her body well. Whatever demanding, restraining, subjugating things he had planned, she’d likely love it.
He led her to the very last door and pushed his way into a large bedroom, steeped in shadows. Just inside the door, he flipped a switch. Low, golden light flooded the bedroom. Beige and white striped the walls. A traditional white headboard framed by heavy brocade drapes dropped from a white cornice box affixed to the ceiling, a wood-burning fireplace tiled in traditional marble and a gleaming white mantel all lent the room an air of elegance. Not a piece of BDSM equipment lay anywhere in sight.
Kata turned to Hunter with a question in her gaze.
He swallowed. “Do you like it?”
The cozy, romantic feel appealed, for sure, but . . . “I do. I guess I was expecting something that looked more like your brother’s living room. ”
An expression she couldn’t discern crossed his face. “Tonight is about you, honey. Whatever you want, it’s yours. ”
It was on the tip of her tongue to ask him why he could just be with her this way tonight and not every other night, but she knew. He simply wasn’t wired that way for the long term. Tonight, Hunter was willing to put aside his desires for her.
It made her love him even more.
She pushed back tears. "That’s . . . ” Incredible. “Thank you. ”
Hunter looked like he wanted to say more but shook it off. He shoved his hands in his pockets. “Tell me how you want this to go. ”
With him, it had never been anything but a whirlwind of desire so intense, it was like standing in the middle of a raging storm. For days, she’d wished he would ease off, not try to overtake her mind and soul. Now that he was giving her what she wanted, Kata wasn’t sure what to say.
“Can you just . . . be with me? Soft, maybe a little sweet?”
For a second, the hard angles of his male face tightened with uncertainty. Finally, he caressed her shoulder, cupped his palm around her neck. “For you, yeah. ”
Her heart was about to break. Kata knew that as soon as he leaned in and kissed her softly, his lips lingering over her own, a velvety brush of tongue. She clung to his wide shoulders and pressed her mouth to his. He didn’t hesitate to open to her, deepen the kiss until she felt herself drowning in the sweet stirrings of pleasure.
“Do you want to lie down?”
Of course. This good-bye was going to be long and poignant. She didn’t want to be rushed or try to join with him standing up. Tonight called for soft sheets, rumpled covers, breathy sighs—a cocoon for lovers.
“Please. ”
Hunter reached up to the switch and killed the lights.
From their argument their first night together in Vegas, she knew that he preferred full light, wanting to see the effect he had on her. He’d given her darkness now as another concession.
Funny thing, she no longer felt self-conscious around him. In fact, she’d rather have the lights on to see every expression on his gorgeous, familiar face.
Before she could say so, he took her hand in his. “Lead the way. ”
Kata frowned. She knew he was letting her set the pace, trying to give her what she wanted, but this behavior was so unlike him, she wondered if making love tonight was going to be like being with him at all.
Biting her lip, she led him over to the plush queen-sized bed. He followed without word, waiting until she sank down to the mattress, her whole back enveloped in something cloudlike, heavenly.
He stretched out beside her, taking her hand in his, turning his face in her direction. Their stares met in the shadows, his questioning . . . and so damn resigned, she felt a sob rise up. Kata turned to him, threw her arms around him, pressed their bodies tight.
Hunter slid his arms around her. “Tell me what I can give you tonight, honey. Whatever you need, it’s yours. ”
That would be his parting gift. She heard it in his voice.
A mix of sadness and panic gripped her. She trapped a sob in her chest and covered his mouth with her own, desperately trying to sink down into the male flavor of him, his gentle embrace. He returned the kiss, every breath, every brush of lips, every slide of tongue. She tried to drown in the heavy, honey-sweet sea of desire he usually created inside her. It wasn’t there.