Forbidden Pleasures

  Everyone worked overtime, though no one as much as Rylan. And as much as I wanted to spend the late nights working with him, I knew it wasn't a good idea. After having been away from him all weekend, with just a few texts between us, I wasn't entirely sure I could keep my hands off of him. Since I didn't see him all day Monday or Tuesday, I could only hope he felt the same way.

  On Wednesday, I got my answer.

  I picked up my phone without missing a stroke on my keyboard. I'd almost finished fixing one of the many problems with our government contractor system and I wanted to get it done before lunch.

  “Jenna.”

  Heat flooded through me. That wasn't the way a boss said an employee's name.

  “I need you.”

  I closed my eyes. Fuck. There could be something completely innocent about what he was saying, but I definitely wasn't thinking innocently. My grip tightened around the phone.

  His next words told me he wasn't thinking that way either.

  “All weekend, I kept thinking about how I couldn't wait to get back to work so I could see you, but this is just making it worse.” His voice was low. “Knowing you're here, just a floor away, and I can't touch you... it's excruciating.”

  My stomach tightened. Men talked during sex and I let them, but I never listened to anything they said. I'd spent too many years having to listen to the filth that spilled out of men's mouths, talking about what they wanted to do to me or have me do to them. I'd always given what was needed, but this was the first time I'd felt anything other than disgusted or indifferent.

  “Did you miss me?”

  The question made me catch my breath. Of course I'd missed him. I'd spent most of the weekend reading and working on code just so I wasn't thinking about how much I missed him.

  “Jenna.” There was a hint of authority in his voice now.

  “Yes,” I answered quickly. I wasn't sure where this was going, but I knew I wanted him to lead.

  “Did you think about me?”

  “Yes,” I answered again.

  “Tell me.”

  I felt a few icy tendrils of panic threatening to claw their way up and I pushed them down. “I thought about you.”

  “More.”

  The push was gentle but firm. He wanted me to do this, but I knew all I had to do was say a single word and he would let it go.

  “I thought about you touching me.” I could feel my heart beating hard against my chest. “Your hands on my breasts, fingers on my nipples.”

  “Sliding my hand down your stomach to slip between your legs.”

  I swallowed hard and nodded, forgetting he couldn't see me. “Yes.”

  “Is that what you want?” he asked. “My fingers inside you, stretching you? Preparing you?”

  I made a sound that I didn't recognize.

  “I think you need to get an ink refill for your printer.”

  I blinked. The sudden change in direction threw me.

  “Supply closet down the hall.”

  I stared at the phone, my stomach twisting as I thought of the implications. We'd said we'd keep our relationship out of work, but that sounded a lot like he was asking me to meet him for some sort of tryst. I wasn't about to question it though. I'd been wanting him all weekend, craving his touch, his body, and I wasn't going to turn down the chance to have him.

  Hoping that my face wasn't as flushed as it felt, I hurried down the hallway toward the supply closet. I opened the door, glancing behind me to make sure no one was watching, and then stepped inside. I held the door open as I reached for the light. It turned on a split second before I got to the switch and I quickly shut the door behind me.

  His arms were around me before I could even register that he was here. His mouth was hot and hard on mine, a near-desperate edge to the kiss. His desire fueled mine and I slid my hands under his shirt. His muscles were firm beneath my fingers and he gasped as my nails raked over his nipples. His hands slid down my back to cup my ass, and then he lifted me.

  My teeth scraped over his bottom lip as he broke the kiss long enough to settle me onto a box of something. I didn't care what was beneath me, as long as he was going to be inside me. I reached for his pants even as he dug into his pocket and produced a condom.

  “Damn,” he swore as my fingers closed around his cock. He cupped the side of my face, lowering his mouth to my throat. Teeth and tongue ran down the length of my neck, never leaving a mark, only the slight sting behind.

  “Fuck me.” I pressed my lips against his ear. “Please.”

  He looked down at me, his eyes dark. “I've been dreaming about this moment since I left work on Wednesday.”

  His hands pushed my skirt up around my hips and I was suddenly glad I'd chosen it instead of pants. I moaned as his fingers traced my slit through my now-wet panties, then swore as he pushed the material aside. I grabbed his shoulders as his fingers slid into me.

  “Just fuck me,” I said, letting all of my need bleed through into my voice.

  “What do you want, Jenna?” he asked.

  I gave him a puzzled look. I'd told him what I wanted. My eyes met his and it clicked. He wanted me to be specific. He wanted to hear me say it, and I knew that I needed to say it.

  “I want you inside me,” I said. I squeezed his fingers with my pussy. “I need to feel your cock inside me, filling me. I want you to fuck me hard enough that I'll feel it the rest of the day.” I'd said some version of those words before, but I'd never meant them until now.

  “Shit,” he breathed as he withdrew his hand.

  I wrapped my arms around his neck, my legs around his waist. My heels rested just beneath his muscular ass and I felt it flex as he positioned himself. A full-body shudder went through me as he slowly pushed his way inside. My head fell back and I fought to keep my eyes open. I'd never dreamed that the initial penetration would feel this good every time, that my body would open to him like we were made to fit together. It was every cliché I'd always hated, but it was proving itself to be true.

  “Faster,” I gasped. I pressed my face against the side of his neck.

  He didn't ask if I was sure or if I was okay. I could feel him holding himself back and knew that he wanted it as much as I did.

  “Harder.” I nipped at the soft flesh of his throat and he groaned.

  His hands tightened on my waist and he began to slam into me, hard enough to drive the air from my lungs. I worked my body against his, moving so that each time we came together, he was deeper inside me, hitting against all of those spots that made me see stars.

  “Fuck,” he growled the word. “So fucking perfect.”

  Instead of the revulsion I usually felt at such sentiment, a rush of emotion went through me. I wanted him to feel that way about me, needed to know that he thought we fit together. My fingers curled around the thick hair at the base of his neck, my breath coming in sharp bursts as the pressure inside me reached the boiling point.

  “Dreamed about this,” he said. His voice was breathless as he drove us toward our climax. “Buried inside you, feeling you so tight around me. Woke up every morning hard as a rock, aching to be inside you.”

  I shivered at the image, the sensation giving me the last bit I needed to tip over the edge. I pressed my face against his neck, letting him muffle the cry of pleasure that escaped as I came. Two more quick thrusts and he followed, whispering my name over and over.

  We clung to each other as we came down and I wondered if he was as reluctant to move as I was. I never felt as good as I did when I was in his arms. It didn't matter what was going on around us or whether anyone else approved of our relationship. I knew that, soon, we'd have to talk about things, make declarations, discuss intentions, but for right now, I was content like this. The world could go on existing outside those doors, but at the moment, it was just us.

  “I guess I can take that to mean you really did miss me,” Rylan said as he pulled back.

  I smiled at him, hoping the emotions on my face weren't as raw
as they felt inside me. “Seems like as much as you missed me.”

  He grinned, his dimples flashing. That smile twisted those things low inside me that said I wanted more. He fastened his pants as I adjusted my clothes. Then he reached for my hand, his expression serious again.

  “I really did miss you,” he said. “And not just the sex. I wanted you there with me, not only in my bed, but by my side.”

  I swallowed hard, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. I wasn't ready for this conversation. Not here. Not now.

  As if he could sense my tension, he continued, “So I think we should start slow with the family thing.”

  “Slow,” I repeated.

  “Suzette and Zeke.”

  I frowned.

  “You've met them, but only as an employee. I want the four of us to go to lunch together. Let them get to know you as my... girlfriend.”

  “Girlfriend?”

  “If you don't like that word, we can think of something else,” he said. His fingers tightened around mine. “As long as it means we're together.”

  I smiled, a thrill going through me. “Girlfriend is fine. And lunch sounds great.” I hoped he couldn't hear my doubt in that last statement. I loved that he wanted to make it clear who I was to him, but I didn't think his sister or friend would see it that way.

  Chapter 12

  I was more nervous about this lunch than I was about anything else that had happened recently. As much as some of the circumstances with Rylan had scared me, at least with him I had known how he felt. While I was pretty sure I knew what Zeke and Suzette thought, it was far from a similar sentiment.

  I chose my clothes carefully, knowing I needed to be the right combination of sophisticated and sexy. I was torn, wanting to be myself but also wanting to make sure they liked me. In the end, I went with a long-sleeved dress that covered my tattoos and complimented my figure. I chose a pair of heeled boots that added a couple inches to my height and kept the make-up simple. If it hadn't been for the blue hair and extra piercings, I could've passed for anyone in high society.

  Rylan's eyes lit up when I opened the door. “You know, I like seeing those long legs, but I have to admit, there's something to be said for leaving something to the imagination.” He brushed his fingers across my cheekbone. “And since I've seen it, my picture of what's under that dress is a very vivid one.”

  “Depends,” I replied with a smile. “Maybe I bought some new lingerie.”

  His hand slid down my ribcage, burning through the cotton fabric of my dress, until it came to rest on my hip. “Maybe I should check and see.” He sighed. “As much as I'd like to strip that dress off and take you back to your room, my sister would never forgive me if I left her there with Zeke.”

  “Your sister and Zeke don't get along?” I asked, curbing my disappointment. I knew he was right.

  “Let's just say that there's some history between them,” Rylan said. His lips twitched.

  “And you thought it would be a good idea to have them both come along to meet me?” I asked as the two of us walked downstairs. “So, what, there's someone they like less than me around?”

  “They don't dislike you,” Rylan said as he opened the back door for me.

  I raised an eyebrow.

  “They just don't know you.” He raised my hand and kissed the back of it. “I promise, once they get to know you, they're going to love you.”

  We'd only been at lunch for a quarter of an hour when I knew, no matter what I looked like, or how I behaved, they'd never accept me. Not for their precious Rylan. And that's what he was to them. To Suzette, he was the perfect big brother, the protector, the one who always made sure she was safe. No one was good enough for him.

  To Zeke, he was not only a best friend but a brother. Zeke would do anything for Rylan. Right now, however, that 'anything' meant keeping Rylan safe from someone like me.

  “So, you and Rylan have been dating for a few weeks?” Suzette asked as she sipped on her wine. “About the time you started working for him?”

  “Actually,” Rylan answered. “She agreed to work for me before she agreed to go out with me.” He gave me a sideways glance. “In fact, I'm pretty sure she thought coming to work for me would stop me from asking her out.”

  “I did think that,” I admitted with a smile. I was glad he'd seen that part of me, even though I knew Suzette and Zeke didn't believe it.

  “I'm just glad it didn't work,” he said, squeezing my hand.

  “Me too.” The heat in my cheeks increased and, nor for the first time, I wished my skin was a bit darker so it didn't show the flush quite so well.

  “You'll be taking her to meet Mom and Dad, I guess,” Suzette said. Her ruby-red lips were pursed and I wondered how much her lipstick had cost. “Or are you going to introduce her to your mom first?”

  I'd been right. Half-sister.

  “I hadn't decided,” Rylan said.

  “Well, you know how that'll go,” Suzette said. She gave Zeke a meaningful look. Whatever had happened between them, it sure wasn't keeping them from working together to make me feel left out. She continued, “If you go to your mom first, she'll lord it over Dad and blame him for you picking someone... well, you know.”

  “My mom gave up the right to have any say about my dating life when she tried to hire a prostitute for me on my eighteenth birthday.” Rylan's tone was mild. “Besides, you know that Dad and Lindsay will do the same thing if I introduce Jenna to them first. They always think that whichever one I talk to first is my favorite.”

  “Whose turn is it then?” Zeke asked. “Which one did you tell first about Curt resigning?”

  Rylan glanced down at me. “I take turns telling my parents things first. Neither one of them are happy with it, but at least they can't claim I prefer one over the other.”

  “Remember when your mom tried suing Dad for custody?” Suzette asked. She shifted the way she was sitting, her body language making it clear that she wasn't including me in the conversation. “She tried saying that he was shooting heroin and was nearly bankrupt because of it.”

  Rylan nodded, his expression tight. “I remember.”

  I wanted to glare at Suzette. It was obvious Rylan didn't want to talk about that.

  “It was the first Thanksgiving we got to spend together,” Suzette said. “Your mom was so angry that the court ruled against her, she claimed she had an anxiety attack and had to be hospitalized.”

  “She always has been a drama queen,” Rylan admitted. “But Dad wasn't much better, hiring that PI.”

  “Yeah, he doesn't like losing, does he?” Suzette chuckled. “It was a good thing the two of us always had each other.”

  “Must've been nice,” Zeke said. “Having someone to go to when your parents were driving you nuts.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “When my parents started fighting, there really wasn't anywhere for me to go.”

  “Sure there was,” Rylan said. “You've always been welcome at our house.”

  “Well, his mom's house, anyway,” Suzette said. “We all know Dad doesn't like him very much.” She shot me a sideways glance. “Dad always had good taste in people.”

  “Or he just doesn’t like the fact that your mom keeps hitting on me,” Zeke snapped back.

  I looked over at Rylan, wondering what he was thinking of the exchange. He looked a bit amused. He leaned down, his breath tickling my ear as he whispered, “Yes, they're always like this.”

  “What about you, Jenna?” Suzette turned toward me suddenly. “What's your family like?”

  “Suzette–” Rylan began.

  She kept going, not even acknowledging that he'd spoken. “Parents divorced, still together or never married? Not that it's a big deal. Even in our social circles, there are plenty of bastards.”

  “Suzette!” Rylan snapped.

  “Come on, Rylan,” Zeke said good-naturedly. “We're both curious. You have to admit, it's weird. You go for years without being in a relationship. Not since Lara, I think, a
nd then you bring someone in to meet us out of the clear blue.”

  “You said you wanted us to get to know her,” Suzette picked up where Rylan had left off. “That's what I'm trying to do. Asking questions. Trying to get to know her.”

  “You're being rude,” Rylan said quietly.

  “It's okay,” I said. I put my hand on his arm.

  “What's the big deal?” Zeke asked. “It wasn't like we were asking for her complete sexual history or access to her finances. Suzette just wanted to know about her family.”

  “Unless there's something about her family she wants to hide,” Suzette said.

  I was getting tired of them talking about me like I wasn't there, but I curbed my annoyance. “Not a lot to say. Never knew my dad and my mom wasn't the best of parents. I moved away to college and never looked back.” I kept my voice even and hoped they wouldn't read between the lines.

  “Jenna, you don't have to say anything,” Rylan said softly. He glared at his sister and then at his friend.

  “It's okay.” I forced a fake smile. “They're just looking out for you.”

  “That's right,” Suzette said. “We are.”

  “And we always will be,” Zeke added.

  “Good,” I said. “I'm glad. Everyone should have someone who watches over them, protects them. Rylan is fortunate to have the two of you.”

  I supposed, in a normal situation, my acknowledgement of their caring about Rylan should've been enough to break the ice, but that didn't appear to be the case here. Whether it was my lack of disclosure or something else, it didn't matter. They didn't like me and nothing would change that.

  The rest of our lunch continued in the same awkward atmosphere. Zeke and Suzette continued to bring up events from the past, not even bothering to try to hide their attempts to remind Rylan how much they meant to him. He did his best to keep them from shutting me out entirely, but I could feel the strain and it twisted my stomach. I ate very little, unable to stomach the idea of a heavy meal. I had a horrible feeling that, if things went further with us, Rylan's relationships with his best friend and his sister would suffer. If I'd thought it would do any good, I would've excused myself and gone home, but I feared it would only make matters worse, drive a deeper wedge between them. Things were going to be hard enough as it was. I didn't need to make it worse.