Walk Through Fire

  “What do you need? Rest? Coffee? A shot of bourbon?”

  I stopped in a way it stopped him. Then I turned in to him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

  “What are you gonna say to Deb, Low? You have to tell her because if you don’t, the girls will, and she’s gonna freak. That could mean she won’t want the girls—”

  He lifted his hands and put them to either side of my neck.

  “Deb did not spend our marriage in a vacuum, Millie,” he stated. “She knew what I was when she met me, when she took my ring, and when she shared my bed. She knew how Chaos changed. She knew our activities after we changed. I didn’t lay all of it out for her but I told her what she needed to know. She isn’t gonna like this. She’s gonna freak. Then she’s gonna trust in the brotherhood. It might take her time to get there. But she’ll get there.”

  I found this hard to believe.

  “Are you sure? Today was extreme,” I pointed out the obvious.

  “She never bought into the biker life, babe, but she lived a long time connected to Chaos. She knows us. She wasn’t into it because she wasn’t into anything. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t know us. She’ll get there.”

  I found this easier to believe but not by much.

  I decided not to pursue that.

  Even so, I didn’t get a chance before he declared, “And if she doesn’t, the gig we got goin’ that’s workin’ good will stop workin’ good. No one is gonna keep my daughters from me for any reason. It just is not gonna happen. She tries, she’ll learn quick she shouldn’t have. But she knows that too. So she ain’t gonna try.”

  That I could believe.

  So I nodded, suddenly feeling exhausted.

  “I think I need a shower,” I told him. “Then I wanna call Dot and—”

  “Unh-unh,” he denied.

  I blinked up at him.

  He saw it and tipped his head so his face was closer to mine.

  His tone was firm, but gentle, when he stated, “You got a big family. That family is yours, all of it, but that don’t mean the bottom line is that you really got two families. You know the gig, too, baby. This is Chaos. You got your sisters in Chaos. You need them, they’re right down the hall. Other than that, no go. This stays in Chaos, and it fucks me to lay down this law after the shit that went down with you today, but that’s the end of it. Hear?”

  “Dot won’t—” I began.

  He cut me off, “Alan will.”

  I shut my mouth because he was right.

  Alan would.

  He’d totally lose his mind.

  “Hear?” he prompted softly.

  I thought of my Chaos sisters in the living room. They’d descended, probably immediately, to look after Logan’s girls.

  I didn’t know them all that well. I just knew I liked them. I trusted them.

  And I was Chaos, in this situation, they were all I had.

  As well as Logan, that was.

  So it was good that was nothing to sneeze at.

  With no other choice, because I’d already made it years ago when I chose Logan, I did what I’d been doing all day.

  I nodded and whispered, “I hear.”

  Like any good old lady should.

  I knew it was the right thing to do even before I did it.

  But when Logan’s hands slid up to my jaw and he used it to pull me up to my toes so my mouth could meet his and he could kiss me light, but long and wet, relieved but determined, that knowledge was confirmed.

  Tack

  It was dark.

  There was only one light lit in the room.

  Tack sat at the head of Chaos’s table.

  Hound was standing, his back to the wall opposite the door.

  But Tack had his gaze on the Chaos flag under the Plexiglas in the middle of the table.

  “High told us what Millie said,” Tack told the table.

  “Yup,” Hound replied.

  Tack stared at the flag.

  But his mind was filled with hearing High’s voice over the phone earlier that day when he’d first gotten the call.

  He felt deep what he heard in High’s voice. The anger that hid the fear.

  He knew how that felt. He knew how it felt to know your woman was in the hands of a madman. He knew how it felt not to know where she was or how to find her. He knew how it felt to know you’d give anything to get her back safe.

  Even if it meant giving your life.

  Even if it meant that would take you away from her, your kids.

  You’d do it.

  Without a thought.

  He knew exactly how that felt.

  And hearing it in his brother’s voice, remembering it in a way that cut like a blade, knowing he had to do everything he could to stop High from giving everything he was, after years of that feeling being gone, it again haunted him.

  He looked from the flag to Hound.

  “You’re on this,” he ordered.

  Slowly, Hound grinned.

  “Alone, Hound. You got that?” Tack asked.

  The grin didn’t waver. “I got it.”

  “No blowback, brother,” Tack ordered.

  Hound lifted his chin.

  The door opened and both men looked to it.

  Tack straightened in his chair and felt the alert coming off Hound when they saw who walked in.

  Keely Black.

  Every time Tack saw her, the wound of losing his brother, a wound that never closed, opened wider.

  And every time he saw her, he thought the waste of the end of Black’s life carried on.

  The woman was beautiful. Years had passed and that beauty matured along with her. Throw in her being sweet as candy and funny as hell, the way her life ended when her man’s did was a tragedy. She had a lot to give in ways that goodness couldn’t be given just to her sons.

  Tack thought, over the years, all that goodness bottled up, it’d explode and she’d find her way out from under the blanket of grief that was smothering her.

  She never did.

  And with eyes that were dead even if they were shining with anger, Tack reckoned it never would.

  “Keely, darlin’, you know, the doors are closed, this room—” he started.

  “Fuck what I know,” she bit out.

  As asked, earlier that day, she’d hightailed it to Millie’s to look after High’s girls.

  But the minute Pete got there, she took off.

  It wasn’t his first choice to ask her to step in. Fuck, he’d never ask her to step in unless the situation was what it was and High needed his brothers around, and fast, to contain him.

  Clearly, she hadn’t liked it.

  “What we asked today, honey, we won’t ask again,” Tack told her quietly.

  “Damn straight, Tack,” she returned, moving into the room and slamming the door behind her. “’Cause, in case you didn’t get it the last time shit went south. And then the time before that and the time before that. You should get it now. For God’s sake, they took Millie.”

  “You shoulda stuck around to see she was good,” Hound told her, and her eyes shot to him.

  “I didn’t because I know Millie. Happy for High she’s back. Took forever and it’s good that shit is over. But if she sees me, she’ll be all up in my shit to heal me. I had enough of that from Pete. From Beverly. From all you all,” she returned. “Only reason Bev’s still around is because she stopped that shit.”

  Bev was Boz’s ex. She and Keely remained tight.

  And it wasn’t lost on Tack that was the reason.

  “Keely—” he began.

  Her eyes snapped to him and she ordered, “Pull back.”

  “Woman—” Hound tried.

  Keely didn’t look from Tack. “Whatever it is you boys are stuck in this time, pull back.”

  He shook his head. “That’s not possible.”

  She crossed her arms on her chest. “It’s not possible because your pride is at stake. The Club’s pride is at stake. But other, more impo
rtant shit is at stake, too, Tack, and you’re far from dumb. You know it. Whatever this lunatic wants from Chaos that’s making him get into it with old ladies, give it to him and pull back.”

  “Babe, you’ve got a place deep in my soul, straight up,” Hound said, and Keely looked to him. “But bottom line, you don’t know what the fuck you’re talkin’ about.”

  “I know why you two are here,” she returned, lifting a hand, finger pointed, to indicate him and Tack. She dropped her hand. “I know you, Hound. I know when you’re called in.”

  “And you know I get the job done,” Hound replied, his voice soft, even tender, and Tack narrowed his gaze on his brother’s face when he saw the same reflected there.

  Fuck.

  That was a look in all their years as brothers Tack had never seen from Hound.

  And that was not a look a man was giving the widow of his dead brother.

  Fuck.

  “It gives me no joy to say that at least when this asshole takes you out, Hound, you’re not leavin’ anyone who loves you more than the breath they take behind,” Keely shot back.

  Tack watched the nearly imperceptible flinch strike Hound’s face.

  Fuck.

  Tack drew her attention to him. “Keely—”

  “Do not call me again, Tack,” she demanded.

  His mouth got tight.

  She looked to Hound and everything about her changed. She went from pissed and belligerent to sad and defeated.

  Seeing that, it also cut like a blade.

  He remembered her. He remembered her young and in love and so fucking happy, she walked into a room attached to Black, or walked into a room Black was in, that happiness would warm every inch of the space.

  Just like Millie was with High back in the day.

  But Millie could get hers back.

  Keely never would.

  “Be careful,” she whispered to Hound. “Be super fuckin’ careful, Hound. Because you might not have a woman who loves you more than her own breath, but you still got folks who love you. So please, God, be careful.”

  With that, she turned, her hair flying, yanked open the door, stalked out, and slammed it behind her.

  Tack looked to Hound.

  Hound was in control. His face neutral.

  But his eyes were glued to the door.

  “We done here?” Tack asked, and Hound cut his gaze to his brother.

  “Yup,” he answered, pushing away from the wall.

  Tack watched him walk around the other end of the table. He waited until Hound’s hand was on the door before he called his name.

  Hound looked back at him.

  “You know,” he said carefully.

  “Know what?” Hound asked.

  “You know you don’t go there.”

  Hound’s brows drew together. “Brother, you call me when you got somewhere to go no one else can go. What the fuck?”

  Tack shook his head but did it with his eyes locked to Hound’s.

  “You know you don’t go there. She’s Black’s. Dead or alive, she’s Black’s. She can move on. I hope to fuck someday she does. But she can’t move on with Chaos.”

  That got him something.

  Hound looked pissed.

  But his voice was quiet when he replied, “You think I don’t know that shit?”

  “I know you know,” Tack returned. “Just remindin’ you.”

  “Don’t need a reminder, brother,” Hound grated out. “Lived with that for years, bein’ in love with a woman I can’t have.”

  Without hesitation, after delivering that, he threw open the door and prowled out. When he slammed it, it was louder and the door shook.

  Tack stared at the door.

  Then he leaned to the table, put his elbow on it, and bent his neck to run his hand through his hair.

  He’d curled his fingers around the back of his neck, the wood of the table all he could see, when he finally muttered aloud, “Fuck.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  Hear?

  Millie

  “NO CARISSA, SHE’S too young, too new to the fold,” Tyra declared. “And no Tabby, because she’s too pregnant.”

  “Hear you,” Elvira muttered.

  “Agreed,” Lanie said.

  I sat with my back to the arm of the couch under the window of Tyra’s office at Ride’s garage, my neck twisted to look out the window.

  We were having our powwow as called by me through Tyra.

  It was Tyra’s decision that it was only Lanie, Elvira, and me.

  She was the president’s old lady. There was a hierarchy even if she did not one thing to demand it, so I knew that was her call.

  Even so, I agreed with her decision.

  “Millie?” she called.

  I tore my gaze off the enormous forecourt outside, bikes parked in front of the Compound, our cars parked in front of the office, the noises muted coming through from the garage, and looked to Tyra at her desk.

  Elvira was sitting on the couch with me, Lanie in a chair opposite Tyra.

  It was three days after the incident and it had gone down like Valenzuela said it would.

  Even though I’d reported to the police he was there and I’d witnessed all I’d witnessed, as Valenzuela said he would, a man came forward and confessed to the crimes.

  He had all the timings right. He had all the activities right (not including Valenzuela and his assassin being involved, but he corroborated the Pedro hitting me, Carlos making the decision to kidnap me portion of my story).

  He also had the gun used in the murders and gunshot residue on his hand.

  Nevertheless, Valenzuela was collected, questioned, but he’d alibied out.

  Not a prostitute.

  His girlfriend, a woman by the name of Camilla Turnbull, said on record that he was with her the entire time.

  They’d also found the prostitute I’d described and she’d said she was there but she’d also said the confessed shooter told her to leave prior to the macabre festivities, confirming all I said that went down. But she also confirmed the lie, that the guy who gave the confession was there, not Valenzuela.

  Furthering Valenzuela’s story, there was nothing to indicate he was there.

  It was a motel; the place was rife with fingerprints and DNA.

  None of it belonged to Valenzuela.

  Canvassing motel guests brought witnesses to me being forced up the steps and into the room. The prostitute’s attendance. Carlos and Pedro being there.

  And the confessed killer was identified.

  Dozens of witnesses to folks coming to and going from the motel, and no one reported a positive ID on Valenzuela or mentioned any other man being present.

  Logan had refused to allow Zadie to be questioned. She was handling things okay and Logan was not fired up to let anything harm that.

  Deb agreed. She was not fired up about any of this and not in a super good mood. But Logan had not been wrong. She didn’t get ugly about it. She looked after her daughters. She’d called and asked after me.

  But she obviously knew the way of Chaos and knew her ex-husband.

  She was no longer an old lady.

  She was still toeing the line.

  Anyway, Zadie couldn’t confirm Valenzuela’s involvement because he wasn’t at my house. So she couldn’t give any more to the story than what they already knew.

  Valenzuela was careful. He’d totally covered his tracks. In fact, the totality of this was both eerie and scary as shit.

  “Millie,” Tyra called again.

  I jerked and focused on her.

  “Sorry,” I muttered.

  “Girl, you gotta get yourself some help,” Elvira encouraged softly, watching me closely. “You need to work things out in your head. The shit you experienced was extreme.”

  I drew in breath and shrugged.

  She was right, of course. I’d been kidnapped and witnessed two men murdered.

  I was an old lady but I wasn’t made of steel.

&n
bsp; But I was also handling it.

  “Is it messing with you?” Tyra asked.

  I nodded. “I wake up at night.” I then shook my head. “Actually, not sleeping great at all.”

  “Is High taking care of you?” Lanie asked.

  “Yeah,” I said quietly, because he was.

  I knew there was rage burning in him down deep.

  But in order to take care of me, he was burying it.

  I didn’t see it. Not at all.

  If I woke up in the middle of the night, he acted like his only reason for being was beating back the demons that woke me. Even during the day when I could control the flashbacks, he was watchful, careful, tender.

  It was a balm that was soothing.

  But even as potent as it was, I knew there would be a long wait to healing.

  “Talked to Malik about this shit,” Elvira declared. “He says as good as the support you have around you is, in every case he’s dealt with, professional help is the only way to go.”

  I feared if I admitted I needed a counselor, the wrath Logan was banking would start to blaze out of control.

  I slid my eyes to Tyra.

  She got me, knew my dilemma, the limited answers to solving it, and gave me a soft smile.

  I looked back to Elvira.

  “It’s sweet you’re worried but it’d help if we could focus on the task at hand,” I told her.

  “I’ll do that. Sure,” she returned. “Only if you promise you’ll consider lookin’ after yourself the way you should.”

  I could give her that so I nodded.

  “Right, what we need to do isn’t gonna be easy,” Tyra declared.

  She was right.

  Meddling in the affairs of the brothers was tricky business. If those affairs were dangerous and they were dealing with them the way they felt they had to, it was a no go.

  But if Logan was banking his rage, I knew his brothers were too. That was what they did. What one felt, the others reciprocated. What one endured, the others endured with him.

  And when vengeance was earned, the others were there to mete it.

  And I worried that Valenzuela knew just that.

  “Millie, are you sure you’re in a place you can be in on this?” Lanie asked.

  I leveled my gaze on her.

  “Just consider living twenty years without Hop, then getting him back. No matter what happened to you in the meantime, would you ever allow yourself to be in a place where you might lose him again?”