Natural Selection
I’M NOT SURE how long we slept that night. Sobbing woke me in the grey light of dawn. Disentangling myself from Nate’s arms, I saw Sariah sitting on the floor in the corner crying. Xander told me they would fall apart when it was all over, and my heart ached for her. Sitting on the floor next to her, I placed my head on her shoulder and laced my fingers through hers. I let myself linger on Mom and Dad, and how much I was going to miss them. The same familiar sadness welled up, but it finally seemed manageable. I could feel the pain and breathe through it. A few silent tears fell, but not the unending stream from before. Sariah had not had the luxury of falling apart yet. She buried her face in my hair and sobbed so hard I feared she might pass out from lack of oxygen. This must have been what it was like for everyone else to watch me fall apart. It must have been so hard for Xander and Sariah to stay enough in tune with their emotions to give me what I needed without this happening.
I’m not sure when it happened but at some point Xander got up and joined us. He laid his head against my back and cried as I held Sariah. Movies and books say men shouldn’t cry, but I truly thought more of my brother for his endless tears. I stretched awkwardly over my shoulder to pat the top of his head, but couldn’t reach. I shifted so Sariah cried on my left shoulder and Xander my right held my family like that for a very long time.
I don’t know how much time it took for them to cry it all out, but tears can only last so long. We checked out of the hotel and headed out. We drove to Springfield to get our mother’s body. She would want to rest with my father, and I was determined to see it happen.
Awkwardly, I climbed out of the car and headed up to the witch’s apartment building. Once inside I didn’t know which door to knock on, so I stood by the door staring helplessly, occasionally starting in one direction, then another, but always hesitating and stepping back. I never came to a decision because the witch from that night came out of an apartment.
“Blessed be, earth sister,” She said, spreading her arms to hug me. “Your mother lies in stasis in the lilacs, ready for her Grounding. May the goddess watch over her on her final journey.”
“I thought none of the Wicca stuff was real—you either have the gift or you don’t.”
“It’s true the craft is born in you, but a healthy respect for the Earth Mother is a good thing to have. Besides, no one looks too closely at a self-proclaimed witch. We are probably the only Otherworlders who can be out of the broom closet and the world simply accepts it. I love the twenty-first century.”
I smiled. I could probably be friends with this witch. If she wouldn’t actively try to kill my brother and sister out of blind hatred, that is. “Ding, dong, the witch is dead,” I said, trying my hardest not to sing like a Munchkin in the Wizard of Oz.
“Then it is as it should be. She could not break us the other night as we protected the young witch, but she had much power. I do not know where she drew her power from, but it was more than any witch I have ever met. She collapsed when we attempted to sever her from her stolen power, and we thought her harmless. Your mother, knowing her time on this plane was at an end, went to check on her. The woman with the stolen craft lurched up and stabbed her. We joined hands and said a spell of protection against her, but she turned and disappeared into the shadows.” Her face was grim.
“I still don’t understand how a mother could do something like that to her own daughter. I might not be blood, but she’d always treated me like I was, and she tried to kill me.”
“When she first performed the ritual to channel the young witch’s power, she was doing it out of a misguided attempt to protect her. The young one told us of the killings, and we forgive her because she did not know. We will teach her the truth and explain who the enemies are.” I felt a little sad knowing she was lumping Xander and Sariah in that group. “But if you are not born with the gift, you are ill-equipped to handle it. We believe it was the theft of the power that drove her mad, but there is no doubt that she was crazy. No sane person could channel that much hatred.”
I nodded and started to leave, but she stopped me. “Know me, earth sister. I am Amber. I am leader of the Capital City Coven. War is coming, and the sides are clear. You will have to choose one. If you are not our friend, you will be our enemy. You should be with your own people, not them!” She practically hissed the last word, narrowing her eyes at the van where Xander and Sariah waited.
“Know me, Amber. I am Amelia Hoffman, and that,” I said emphatically, gesturing towards them, “is my family. And if you or anyone does anything to harm them, I will turn the wrath of the Earth Mother on you. I will turn this entire town into a desert waste if I have to, but I will protect my family. If that makes us enemies, then I will weep for you when you are dead.”
She looked taken aback by the venom in my voice, but I didn’t give her time to react as I tore the door open and headed to the van. If my life were a movie, dramatic music would have been playing. I would slide on sunglasses in slow motion and climb into the van in fluid movements. Sadly, my life is a lot less perfect than a movie, and there was no music—I didn’t even have sunglasses.
We gathered Mom’s body and laid her across the back seat She looked almost like she was sleeping, lying with her hands folded on her stomach—except the large gory hole where the stake had been pulled from her chest. We took her home and laid her beneath the lily bushes.
The news was all over about what happened. They decided a homeless person had broken into the Luthy Botanical Garden greenhouse and the cold Midwest winter air had killed all the plants overnight. After days of debate, they finally concluded the human remains belonged to a victim of spontaneous human combustion, which made me laugh. After a week it stopped being news and they moved on to the next story. If nothing else could be said about Central Illinois, there was always violence to keep the scent of blood fresh in the air.
Peter Mathews was in fact very much alive, though still in a coma. His heart had been damaged by the lightning, but they thought he was going to be ok. I wondered if we would have to worry about him, but I figured we would cross that bridge when we got there.
Xander made the arrangements for Mom’s Grounding. Grandma and Grandpa came, as did Nate’s aunt. The same earth sprite said a few kind words before the earth swallowed her body, forever resting with our dad. I imagined them in the afterlife holding hands and smiling down on us. We stood for a long time around the site blinking back tears as we said goodbye one last time. I added a lily to Mom’s grave, growing them both until they merged into one, feeling it was appropriate.
We packed up the house, slowly packing away a life that no longer fit. In the basement, hidden behind the furnace, we found a locked door. When I touched it I sensed something strange and organic react to me and the door opened, revealing a safe. After several attempts to open we figured out the combination was our birthdays and pulled it open. Inside, the safe was about the size of my closet, and it was filled floor to ceiling with cash, some modern and some old. I suppose it had been accumulating over the years, but it was a lot to take in.
We gave the keys to Grandma, who promised to send movers when we finally settled somewhere. Too many people knew where we were, and we should probably be further away. We had no idea where were going, we just knew we couldn’t stay here. Nate wanted to go to Washington with the American rainforests. Sariah wanted somewhere sunny and warm like Florida. Me, I was thinking Denver. I remember my time in the mountains with much fondness.
Before we headed out, Grandma performed the proper ritual for Nate’s and my formal Mating. As the matriarch of my family, it was a duty that fell to her. It was a somber affair, and we were all too aware of the conspicuous absences. We held the ceremony under the cherry tree, next to the lilies that marked their final resting place. I think Mom and Dad were there in spirit.
With a heavy heart we packed everything we could fit into Sariah’s Escape and headed out, destination unknown. The plan was to each drive for two hours with no real destination. A
t the end of it all, we would figure out where we were and where we were going. With one last long look at our home, I climbed into the car knowing I would never see this place again. I was surprised by the lack of sadness this time, but perhaps I had already said my goodbyes. I didn’t look back as we drove away, just took Nate’s hand in mine. As long as I was with my family, I would always be home. And that was enough. For now.