Earthling Ambassador

  That was easy.

  "Tyler," said Nicola instantly.

  "Hmmmph," said Greta. "Talk about favoritism."

  "Although notice she doesn't favor her loving older brother," said Sean.

  Tyler stood soldier-straight, his eyes glittering and the tips of his ears--always a giveaway--glowing pink. "I'll give it a go," he said.

  "Of course, it is a mini spaceship," said Georgio. "So it's very slow. It will take you five long, boring minutes to get to Earth, but the advantage is that it's very easy to operate--or so the brochures say!"

  "Fortunately, the palace guards are not the most intelligent creatures," said Mully. "So that should buy you a little time. And it's lucky Earth is such a large, populated planet.Tracking you down will be like looking for a needle in a haystack."

  "Sean left the invitation to the pool party in the princess's bedroom," pointed out Greta. "If someone finds it, the guards will be heading straight to this address right now."

  "HA!" said the princess through her taped-up mouth.

  "I can feel the most terrible migraine coming on," said Georgio.

  "Nicola, you need to get your people off this planet right away." Mully spoke in a rapid, deadly serious tone of voice Nicola had never heard her use before. "Georgio, take Tyler to the spaceship and start going through the instruction manual with him. Katie, go with Shimlara and she'll show you where to find the first-aid kit. I'll be there to help you with the cast in just a moment. Greta, you can collect everybody's luggage. Sean, help the princess--gently!--along to the garage. Nicola, come with me into my study. I need to have a very quick chat with you."

  For a few seconds everybody stared in wonder at this new Mully. Even though she was still dressed in her funny pink pajamas, she seemed to be an entirely different sort of person.

  "Mully was an officer in the Globagaskar Army when we first met," explained Georgio. He beamed proudly at his wife. "Isn't she impressive?"

  "MOVE IT, MOVE IT!" barked Mully, and everybody hurried to obey her.

  Nicola followed Mully into her study.

  As she shut the door, Mully turned back into a normal mom. "Is that knee hurting you too much, dear?"

  Nicola looked down at her grazed knee. "No, it's fine."

  "I want to give you something," said Mully. "During my army days, I was in charge of weapons purchasing for a while, and the weapon manufacturers keep sending me free samples, in spite of all the letters I send telling them to take me off their mailing lists. I think this particular weapon might come in handy."

  Mully pulled a silver briefcase from underneath her desk and placed it in front of Nicola. It had a round lock, like on a safe.

  "The code is 55-77-99." Mully swiftly twisted the dial. "Don't tell anybody else the code. I don't want anyone making the decision to use these weapons except you, Nicola."

  The lock clicked open and Mully lifted the lid. Nicola peered in, preparing herself not to flinch if she saw something horrible and scary, like guns or knives.

  "Oh!" she said in surprise.

  The case held a set of what looked like colorful tennis balls.They didn't look at all dangerous.

  "They're freeze-grenades," explained Mully. She lifted one of the balls out of the case and showed it to Nicola. "They're extremely effective weapons. I've set them especially for use against the palace guards. If you throw one at any guard within a five-meter radius, he or she will be frozen solid for ten minutes, giving you plenty of time to escape. Being frozen by a freeze-grenade is not a pleasant experience. It feels extremely cold and once the thawing begins, very itchy. By the time one can move again, one tends to be extremely upset and angry. So if the guards catch up with you on Earth, my advice is to throw the freeze-grenades, dump the princess, and run for your lives."

  "Right." Nicola nodded, trying to look like a cool-headed army major, as if the words "run for your lives" didn't fill her with jelly-knee terror.

  "Remember, the grenades are for emergency use only against the guards," said Mully. "I recommend you do not tell your brother Sean about these, for obvious reasons."

  "He'd love to try them," agreed Nicola.

  "Well, I just hope you don't need them," said Mully. "But I'll feel safer if I know you're armed in some way. Got all that?"

  "Got it," swallowed Nicola.

  Mully snapped the case closed. "Don't forget.The code is 55-77-99.You won't forget it, will you?"

  "55-77-99," repeated Nicola. "I won't forget."

  "Georgio and I will be doing our best to stall the palace guards on Globagaskar for as long as we can," said Mully. "We have it all worked out.We'll make it look like we have the princess in the aero-car. I'm going to call Molly Smith from the Save the Little Earthlings Committee. She has a daughter with red, curly hair just like the princess who fancies herself as an actress.We'll make a show of dragging her to the aero-car and taking off. Fortunately, I did aero-speed-driving as part of my army training, so I should be able to give them a run for their money before they realize they've been duped and come looking for you."

  Nicola was slightly in awe.To think she'd thought Mully was just an ordinary mom.Then again, maybe all ordinary moms revealed unexpected talents in times of crisis.

  "Listen to me, Nicola," continued Mully. Her voice was grave, her eyes flat and serious. "Kidnapping the princess is a very serious crime. If she chooses, she could have all of you thrown in jail."

  "She's threatened to have us beheaded." Nicola hoped Mully would laugh in an "as if!" way, but she just looked more serious.

  "Well, she could do that, too, if she wanted," said Mully. "Georgio and I would also be punished for helping you--and so would all the other members of the Save the Little Earthlings Committee. So if you want to save your planet and all our lives, it's absolutely essential that you do one thing. It's the one thing I always hoped you'd achieve. It's the one thing I think will give us success."

  Nicola's fingers tightened around the handle of the briefcase.

  "What's that?"

  Mully bent all the way down from her huge height so she was at the same level as Nicola and could look her straight in the eyes.

  "You must become friends with the princess."

  CHAPTER 26

  "Welcome aboard, esteemed passengers! My name is Tyler Brown and I'll be your captain for today's journey."

  Tyler's voice was crackly and nervous over the spaceship's loudspeakers.

  "Ah, Tyler, maybe we could skip that part," suggested Nicola. Outside the spaceship she could see Mully and Georgio standing just to the side of the launch pad, looking anxious. Mully tapped her finger meaningfully on her watch.

  Nicola said, "We're in a bit of a hurry."

  "Georgio told me to follow everything exactly as it's written in the instruction booklet," said Tyler.

  "Oh, all right," said Nicola. "Just as fast as you can." She didn't want to make him any more nervous than he already was.

  She looked around the tiny spaceship, which was a miniature, prettier version of Georgio's. Everybody was strapped tightly into their passenger-pods.They each had at least one Band-Aid on a nasty cut or graze. Shimlara's arm was in a cast, supported by a sling. Everyone looked grim and quiet. Even the princess had stopped trying to talk and was resting her head against the spaceship wall, her eyes closed, her tiara still in place. Nicola wondered what she was thinking. It was going to be hard to become friends with her. Even Greta seemed like a friendly, easygoing person compared to Princess Petronella.

  "Right."Tyler squinted at the computer in front of him and began to type something slowly and painstakingly. "My destination planet is ... Earth."

  He turned around to Nicola.

  "Where exactly on Earth should we go?"

  Nicola could hear a clattering sound of approaching helicopters in the distance. Someone must have found the invitation.The guards were on their way.

  "Um, just put Australia," she said hurriedly.

  "A-u-s ..." Tyler punched in the letters one b
y one.

  "HURRY UP!" exploded Greta.

  "Leave him alone," said Shimlara. "He's never done this before."

  "Esteemed passengers, please fasten your seat belts and prepare for blastoff," said Tyler into the microphone.

  Nicola glanced out the spaceship window and saw Georgio leaping about like a furious orangutan and mouthing the words, "GO, GO!"

  "Tyler," said Nicola. "This is a direct order. I'm ordering you to blast off NOW."

  "Yes, sir!" said Tyler, and he banged one fist hard on a large red button.

  There was a roaring sound and the spaceship filled with orange light. Outside, Mully and Georgio shielded their faces from the heat of the flames.

  The spaceship quivered, as if it wasn't certain what to do next.

  "Mmmm."Tyler scratched his head.

  Suddenly they blasted straight into the night air through the garage roof, which was now flipped up and open. (Luckily Shimlara had remembered to press the button marked SPACESHIP roof EXIT.)

  "WHOOOEEEE!" yelled Sean.

  All around them was silent velvety blackness and the silver glow of starlight.

  "Look! There's Globagaskar!" Shimlara pointed down at what looked like a golf ball disappearing in the distance.

  The princess made a squeaking sound through her taped mouth.

  "Maybe we should take her tape off so she can talk now," suggested Katie.

  Nicola began to speak, but Tyler interrupted her. "Esteemed passengers, please prepare for--"

  It was like the spaceship had just slid over the very highest point of a roller coaster.They plunged down so fast that the air rushed out of Nicola's lungs.

  I don't even like roller coasters, thought Nicola. She closed her eyes and waited for the huge crash that was sure to follow and would probably hurt.

  "... landing," said Tyler calmly.

  Nicola opened her eyes. "What happened?"

  "We're here," said Tyler.

  "But there wasn't even a bang," said Katie.

  "Yep, I got it under control at the last second," said Tyler modestly. "Sorry about the nosedive.Won't happen again."

  "Tyler, you're a natural!" said Shimlara.

  Tyler blushed pink. "I don't know about that."

  "It was very quick," said Nicola. "It seemed faster than five minutes."

  Sean unbuckled his belt and clapped Tyler on the shoulder. "Good one,Tyler. So, whereabouts on Earth have we landed?"

  He pulled the lever on the spaceship door and looked out.

  "What's that awful smell?" Greta wrinkled her nose.

  A strange, horrible smell filled the spaceship. It was a mixture of dried out seaweed, Nicola's dad's tennis shoes, and old cat-food tins.

  Nicola unbuckled her seat belt and went to peer over Sean's shoulder.

  "All I can see is ... mud." She held her nose. "Bubbling ... black ... mud."

  They weren't going to have much luck convincing the princess to save Earth if this was all they could show her. Besides the smell, the sky was a menacing dirty yellow and there wasn't a tree or bird in sight, let alone a butterfly. The mud stretched as far as she could see. It was like they'd landed on a huge mud desert.

  "Hopefully we can catch a bus to somewhere nicer," she said to Sean.

  "Yeah, but I don't exactly see any bus stops." Sean took off his baseball cap and scratched the top of his head.

  Shimlara appeared behind them. "Is this Earth? It doesn't look like I thought it would look. Actually it reminds me of something we studied in intergalactic geography. Now what was it?"

  Just then Nicola saw a figure in the distance coming toward them. It looked like a rather plump woman carrying an umbrella.

  "Oh good," she said. "We can ask that lady about the nearest bus stop."

  "I'll go." Sean jumped out of the spaceship.There was a glooping sound as he sank up to his knees in the black mud.

  "Huh!" said Sean, in a pleased way, as if he enjoyed being knee-deep in mud. He began wading his way toward the lady with the umbrella.

  Nicola turned back around to find the princess having some sort of fit. She was wriggling around in her seat, bobbing her head up and down, and rolling her eyes like a frightened horse.

  "I guess you'd better take the masking tape off now," said Nicola to Katie. "Let's hear what she has to say. As long as her hands stay tied for now."

  Katie was nervous as she reached over and tugged gently at the edge of the tape. "This might hurt a little, Princess Petronella."

  "Oh for heaven's sake," said Greta, and she ripped the tape from the princess's mouth in one swift movement.

  "We're not on Earth, you ridiculous fools," Princess Petronella spat out. "We're on ARTH!"

  At the word "Arth," Shimlara gasped.

  "And that's NOT a lady your brother is so cheerily waving at," continued the princess. "It's an Arth-Creature looking forward to a delicious Earthling snack!"

  CHAPTER 27

  "She's right." Shimlara spoke so fast and breathlessly, she could barely get the words out. "Our teacher showed us pictures.That's why it looks familiar. Arth is at the top of the Galaxy's Ten Most Dangerous Planets list. Arth-Creatures eat ALL other species--Globagaskarians, Earthlings, whatever!"

  "I mustn't have pressed the E key hard enough."Tyler sounded devastated. "I should have been more careful."

  "You were rushing," said Katie. "It could have happened to anyone."

  "So are you just going to sit around and have a good long chat about it?" asked Princess Petronella. "May I suggest we get out of here, fast?"

  "SEAN!" yelled Nicola. "COME BACK RIGHT NOW!"

  Sean didn't seem to hear. He kept wading through the mud toward the creature, waving his arm to get its attention. Either he was too far away to hear Nicola, or he was just pretending not to hear her, which was something he often did when it suited him.

  "Nic-o-la."

  It was such a croaky, quivery voice and it sounded so unlike Greta that it took Nicola a confused moment to identify the voice. Greta's face was chalky white. "Look." She pointed a shaky finger to the left of Sean and the lady.

  Nicola felt a jolt of pure fear. A line of squat furry brown creatures with large umbrella-shaped heads, curved, cruel claws, and hungry, sharp-toothed mouths came lumbering toward Sean.

  Nicola could hear a strange low humming sound becoming louder and louder.

  "They're smacking their lips," explained Princess Petronella.

  "Right," said Shimlara. "Let's go rescue Sean."

  "Wait!" Nicola grabbed her by the elbow just before she launched herself from the spaceship. "We need to arm ourselves."

  She pulled the silver case Mully had given her from underneath the seat. She never expected that she would have to use it.

  "Untie the princess," she told Greta. "She can help us."

  "Do you really think it's wise to be untying our prisoner?" asked Greta, but she was already starting to untie the ropes around the princess's hands.

  "I'm going to give you each a freeze-grenade," said Nicola. "We'll have to surround the Arth-Creatures to make sure we get every single one of them."

  "Quick!"Tyler took another look out the spaceship window. "They're getting closer."

  Nicola twisted the first dial to 55.

  But what were the other two numbers? Her mind was like a blank sheet of paper.

  "Hurry!' cried Shimlara.

  "55-77-99," snapped Greta.

  Nicola stared at her.

  "Mully told me to remember those numbers just in case you needed them," said Greta. "She said that they were important, but she didn't tell me what they were for."

  "Thank you," said Nicola.

  "Lucky some of us have got good memories," huffed Greta.

  Nicola twisted the dials and opened the case, handing a freeze-grenade to each person in the spaceship, including the princess.

  "Just throw them as close as you can to the creatures. When they hit the ground and explode, they give off a cloud of gas that will freez
e anything within a five-meter radius."

  "I know how to use a freeze-grenade," said the princess haughtily. "Although I don't see why I should help save the lives of my kidnappers."

  Nicola looked at Shimlara's injured arm. "Can you throw with your left hand? Maybe you should stay here in the spaceship."

  Shimlara grabbed a grenade with her left hand. "I can do it."

  "NICOLAAAAAAAAAA!" It was Sean yelling.

  "We're coming. Just stand still!" Nicola poked her head out of the spaceship.

  "Okay." She looked back at the other members of the Space Brigade. "We've got to spread out and surround them. Don't throw your grenade until you're in a position where you can get as many Arth-Creatures as possible. If we don't get all of them and we haven't got any grenades left then we're--"

  "Lunch," finished the princess, smiling grimly. "They'll be having us for lunch."

  CHAPTER 28

  The members of the Space Brigade--minus Sean--stood crowded together in the small spaceship cabin, clutching their freeze-grenades and looking expectantly at Nicola.

  "Let's go, everybody!" she ordered, trying to sound confident instead of terrified.

  Her eyes watered as she stepped onto the steps of the aircraft and the horrible stench filled her nostrils. She realized that they'd actually landed on the outer edge of what appeared to be a gigantic, scooped-out crater. It was like an Olympic stadium, except the steep sides were lined with boulders instead of seats, and the middle was a vast prairie of black, bubbling mud.

  Right in the middle of the crater was a heart-stopping sight. At least twenty Arth-Creatures were purposefully plodding through the mud from all directions, forming a big, uneven circle around Sean. He had turned his baseball cap around backward and was bending at the knees, his arms crossed in kung fu attack position. Only Sean would think he could single-handedly take on a pack of dangerous alien creatures, after three beginner kung fu lessons.

  Nicola clamped her mouth shut to stop herself from screaming for her mom and dad.This wasn't a bad dream. It was real. Her brother could be torn to bloody shreds and eaten in front of her. She needed to think. If the Space Brigade was going to make it out of this alive, they needed to be smarter than the Arth-Creatures.