Stanley Stickle Hates Homework
Plan B. Ruby’s hanky
‘I’ve come to see how Ruby is.’
Mrs Ratner smiled down at Stanley’s concerned face. ‘What a nice thing to do, Stanley Stickle, and it’s so unexpected. I didn’t know you and Ruby were friends.’
Stanley stuck two fingers together and held up his hand. ‘Oh yes,’ he said. ‘We’re like that, me and Ruby.’
‘That’s nice,’ said Mrs Ratner. ‘She hasn’t mentioned you though. Maybe you’re the quiet one she talks about now and then.’
‘That’s me,’ said Stanley. ‘You’d hardly know I was there most of the time.
‘Well, Stanley, I’m afraid Ruby is actually quite ill. We had the doctor out to her, she’s got measles.’
‘Oh dear,’ said Stanley. ‘That’s not very nice is it? I hope she gets better really soon.’
‘Thank you, Stanley,’ beamed Mrs Ratner. ‘You’re a very kind boy. I’ll tell Ruby you called round.’
‘Err, could I see her for a couple of minutes? Just to say good luck.’ asked Stanley.
‘I’m afraid not,’ said Mrs Ratner. ‘She’s contagious you see. You could catch measles too and we wouldn’t want that would we?’
‘I’ll risk it.’ Stanley placed a sturdy foot into the hallway.
Mrs Ratner shooed him out and reached to close the door. ‘Thank you for coming, Stanley and thank you for your concern. I’ll pass on your get-well message. I’m sure it will help.’
Stanley stood back from the front door and thought furiously. Which room would Ruby be in? If he could find out he might still be able to make his plan work. He took a few steps back and studied the upstairs windows, but there were no clues to be had.
Stanley stepped round to the back of the house and looked up at the rear windows. One of them contained a large, Disneyland Paris sticker. That had to be her room. He knew Ruby had been there because she hadn’t shut up about it for months.
Stanley picked up a handful of gravel and threw it at the window.
No one came.
Stanley picked up a bigger handful and threw it at the glass. It made such a racket that he almost made a run for it. He listened for the sound of Mrs Ratner’s voice but all was quiet. A few seconds later Ruby appeared. Her face was bright red and blotchy, she looked really hot. ‘What do you want, Stanley,’ she asked.
‘I’ve come to see how you are, Ruby.’
‘I’m ill,’ said Ruby, weakly. I have the measles.’
‘I know, your mum said,’ said Stanley. ‘Look, Ruby, I don’t suppose you have a hanky or something up there do you?’
‘You came all the way round here for a hanky?’ Ruby looked puzzled. ‘I’ve got some in my drawer.’
‘Great,’ said Stanley. ‘Do you think you could blow your nose into one and throw it down to me?’
‘Blow my…whatever for?’
‘I want to sniff it,’ said Stanley.
‘Sniff it? Stanley that’s disgusting.’
‘I know it is, but …. Go on, Ruby, please. You’re really lucky having measles; you’ll miss the big test and all the extra homework.’
‘I’d rather do the big test and homework,’ said Ruby. ‘Measles is awful.
‘It can’t be as bad as all that,’ said Stanley, who had never had measles and had no idea how bad it was. ‘I’ll, err, I’ll be your boyfriend for a week.’
Ruby began to weaken, she’d never had a boyfriend and the offer was very tempting.
‘Will you carry my bag home from school for me?’
‘Yes, I’ll do that, Ruby,’ said Stanley, generously.
‘Will you hold my hand when I’m frightened?’ she asked.
Stanley wasn’t sure about that one. ‘Err, I suppose I could, for a second or two.’
‘And will you tell Soppy Sonia that I’m your girlfriend if she asks?’
Stanley hesitated; there were limits.
Ruby was adamant. ‘You have to tell her or the deal is off.’
Stanley blew out his cheeks. ‘Oh, okay then, just hurry up with the hanky.’
Ruby was delighted. ‘Hold on a minute, I’ll get the one from under my pillow.’
Ruby’s head disappeared into the room. Stanley punched the air and did a little dance. When he looked up again he found Mrs Ratner’s face looking down at him.
‘Stanley Stickle, go home this minute. If I catch you round here again I’ll tell your mum.’
Stanley was horrified. ‘But, Mrs Ratner, Ruby was just going to…’