Commencement

  ****

  When Jim arrived at the Blue Note, the crowd was a bit thin since not many people had gotten off of work yet. Instead of sitting at the bar where he usually sat, he got a table near the door so that he could spot Callie when she walked in. It was not yet 3:30 and he wasn’t expecting Callie to be on time, so he took the liberty of ordering a drink. Jim stuck to his resolve and only ordered a ginger ale with ice. From where he was sitting he could see the T.V. at the bar. There was a Lakers game on and Jim watched while he waited and nursed his drink.

  “Hey stranger”, he heard someone say after a while.

  Jim looked over to see Callie. She was wearing a long black goose down bubble coat, a knit scully and those ugly black suede snow boots that were popular at this time. She looked as beautiful as ever with her hair down, and cascading around her narrow face. Beautiful, but sad.

  “Take a load off”, Jim offered.

  “Thanks.”

  She took off her coat to reveal a mint green cashmere v-neck and black skinny jeans.

  “What? No scrubs?”

  “I don’t wear my scrubs in the street. It’s unsanitary. What have you got there?”

  “Ginger ale.”

  “Ginger ale?” scoffed Callie “I don’t think so, I’m going to need something a lot stronger”, she said. “Waiter!”

  “I didn’t know you drank?”

  “I do now.”

  “Hold on. I’d like to hear what’s wrong before you get incoherent on me.”

  “You want to know what’s wrong? I’ll tell you what’s wrong. I just realized that the people who I thought were my friends really don’t give a damn about me.”

  “Hey, Hey! Where’s all this coming from?”

  “Oh, please. Like you don’t know.”

  “No, I don’t.”

  “I’m always the last person in our group to find out anything. Like at the Election Night party. You have no idea how stupid I felt when everyone knew about Allen’s new job except me.”

  “He didn’t really want anyone to know.”

  “Just don’t”, she said waving her hand. “And you know I was so angry at them, especially Allen. I just decided to give everyone the cold shoulder, just to see if anyone would notice. Do you think anyone came by to ask me what was wrong? Was anyone concerned?”

  “Maybe they think you’re still angry about Tim throwing up on you at the party.”

  “Really? After more than a month? Do you really think I’m that petty? I could have been abducted or something for all anyone knew.”

  “Richard’s been missing in stretches longer than that. And everyone knows you know how to take care of yourself. It’s not like you’re Miko or something.”

  Callie glowered at the mention of that name.

  “Sorry. Poor choice of words.”

  “It’s probably all her fault anyway. She’s probably been badmouthing me to everyone there.”

  “No, you know Miko’s not like that. I just think everybody’s preoccupied with finding out God’s purpose for their lives. Tamiko’s got everyone drinkin’ her Christian kool-aid. Even Tim’s been going to church.”

  “The agnostic is going to church?”

  “I think we both know why he’s there.”

  “Because he can’t get enough of Thumbelina? I hope he gets her pregnant. And what about Richard? Has he gone mad, too?” “No, he’s too into his new girlfriend. Besides he’s always been in and out.”

  “So is that the new hang out now? Greater Apostolic?”

  “I guess. Allen’s even got a new spiritual partner. Some guy from his job. Seems that he’s a new member of the Church, too.” “And yet another thing I’m the last to know about! Where’s that waiter already?”

  The waiter came and Callie ordered a bottle of Alize.

  “Don’t feel so bad about being out of the loop. You’re not the only one. I haven’t hung out with them in I don’t know how long.” “And yet you still know a lot more than I do.”

  “Sometimes I wish I didn’t.”

  “What do you mean by that?”

  “It’s just that Allen and I go way back. We were like brothers. But now…ever since he’s been on this spiritual journey, it seems like we’ve been growing further and further apart. One day I wake up and it’s like we have nothing in common anymore. Allen was the one person who I thought I could always rely on and now I don’t even know if we’re still friends. And then to see him with this Davis dude and they’re hitting it off like they’ve been friends for years…”

  “I understand that you and Allen were really close, and I’m sorry that your bromance with him has ended, but did you stop for one minute to think that maybe you have other friends, you could talk to. Like say…me, for instance?”

  “I can’t argue with you, Callie. I’m sorry. You’re right.”

  At that moment, the waiter arrived with a bottle of Alize and two glasses.

  “Alright! It’s party time!” buzzed Callie as she poured herself a large drink.

  “I can’t believe you’re about to get your drink on. I’ve never seen this side of you Callie.”

  “You’re about to see a lot of different sides of me. I’m tired of being good old reliable Callie. Taken for granted Callie. I’m done with that.”

  “I don’t know if I should.”

  “Oh, come on. One drink won’t hurt.”

  “You don’t want to be rude,” a new voice reasoned “and Callie needs you to show her your here for her right now.”

  “Why not.”

  “Here’s to Saints and Sinners. Allen, his skanky girlfriend, Tamiko, Tim, and what’s his face are the Saints and you and me can be the sinners.”

  “Here, here. And Allen’s not seeing that girl anymore. She dumped him after she found out he was a porter. So it was over before it even started.”

  “Serves him right. Especially after the way he’s treated me lately. And he calls himself a Christian. Is this how Christians treat their friends? If so, then good riddance.”

  “Christianity is full of contradictions as the Christians are apt to be.”

  “I’m not trying to trash their religion or anything, but I just don’t understand why Allen wouldn’t want to share what he’s going through with me or at least try to explain. I mean Tamiko was putting it down for Tim.”

  “That’s because Tamiko is more sure than Allen. Allen doesn’t really understand it himself. He’s hardly in a position to explain it to you or anyone else.”

  “Yeah, but he could have talked about how he felt. Instead he just shut me out. And after everything we’ve been through together, I just can’t believe…” Callie’s voice trailed off as she began to choke up.

  “Hey. It’s gonna be okay”, said Jim gently stroking her hand.

  “It’s just that…it’s like I don’t mean anything to him at all.”

  “I don’t think that’s true.”

  “Then why hasn’t he come to see me?”

  “Maybe he thinks you’re too busy. Or maybe he thinks you don’t want to see him. After all, you are giving him the cold shoulder.”

  “I didn’t think about it that way.”

  “Why don’t you call him and tell him how you feel?”

  “That’s just it. I’m always calling Allen, always cheering him up when he’s down, encouraging him, worrying about him when he’s not around. Now it’s time for him to worry.”

  “I do think he tends to take you for granted.”

  “Who knows? Maybe it’s better this way. If he can’t come around to see about me then the relationship…I mean, our friendship is over.”

  “I don’t think you mean that, Callie.”

  “Oh yes I do. As a matter of fact, let’s make a new clique. You and me can start a new clique and we can make more friends who aren’t too caught up in their religion to show their friends that they care. What do you say friend?”

  “Sure why no
t?”

  Jim and Callie spent the rest of the afternoon and into the evening talking and commiserating together, finishing two bottles of Alize in the process. The alcohol had lightened their moods and they moved on to less weighty topics such as their old high school days, and the prom. Gone were their troubles, anxieties and fears. They stayed in their spots all through out the night oblivious to everything and everyone around them.

  “Oh my gosh, what time is it?” asked Callie “It’s real dark out there.”

  “Let me see”, replied Jim pulling out his phone. The screen was nothing more than a bright blurr.

  “I can’t tell. I think someone changed the language on my phone”, he laughed.

  “It was nice talking to you, Jim, but I need to get home.”

  Callie stood up and then wobbled a little before falling back into the chair.

  “I guess that didn’t work”, she laughed.

  “Maybe you should take a cab.”

  “Are you crazy? Ain’t no cab stopping for no black woman this time of night.”

  “You right. You right. You know what. You can crash at my pad. I have an extra bedroom and in the morning you can drive yourself home. How’s that?”

  “Alright. I don’t feel like driving anyway. It’s too much work.”

  Callie attempted to get up again and this time, Jim put his arm around her waist to steady her. Then he helped her with her coat and her purse before they exited the Blue Note and headed toward his apartment.

  When they arrived, Callie was not in the best shape to say the least. He could tell that she had never drank as much as she had tonight and was truly out of sorts. But at least she could hold her liquor. She hadn’t thrown up once since they left the bar. Jim himself was a bit disoriented. By the time they reached the entrance of the building, she was not able to remain vertical without Jim’s assistance. This was a struggle for Jim who was not only dealing with trying to coordinate Callie’s movements but his own as well. Yet she was very voluble, at times breaking into choruses of the song “That’s What Friends Are For”. By the time they reached Jim’s apartment door, he was practically carrying her. Jim set her down for a moment to open the door, while she picked up her song once more.

  “Shhhh, girl. You gonna wake up everybody in the building!” Jim whispered as he fumbled clumsily with his keys.

  “So. They need to wake up.”

  After several tries, Jim was able to locate the lock with his key and opened the door. Then he went over to where he deposited Callie on the floor, picked her up and carried her across the threshold, and kicked the door closed behind him.

  “Oh, Jim, you’re my hero.”

  “I don’t know about that”, he groaned depositing her on the couch, and then slumping beside her.

  Callie leaned her head against Jim’s chest and put her arms around him.

  “You’re a good friend Jim.”

  “You’re a good friend, too, Callie.”

  “Promise me you’ll always be my friend.”

  “I promise.”

  “And you’ll always call me, and come over, and invite me to cool parties.”

  “Promise.”

  “And you won’t leave me alone.”

  “I won’t leave you if you won’t leave me. Deal.”

  “Deal.”

  “Goodnight, Callie” said Jim attempting to extricate himself from her embrace.

  “Don’t, please. Don’t leave me.”

  Even in the darkness of the apartment Jim could see the plaintive, pleading expression in her eyes. It spoke to the longing and loneliness within his heart. For a long time he had been drifting on his raft, alone on the quiet water, the noise of the falls growing louder and louder. Now there was someone else struggling in the water. Jim pulled her closer to himself. He was going over the falls, but he was glad he was not alone.

  Forty-Three