Commencement
The Brotherhood Bible Study group had just finished for the day, and Allen was on his way home for the Sunday Dinner, which would be held at his house this week. He walked downstairs to the vestibule and was about to leave when he heard some familiar voices behind him.
“Thank you again for your time, Pastor Bynum.”
“You know you’re welcome any time, Tim. I don’t mind.”
“I thought I heard you two”, interrupted Allen. “Pastor, are you
grooming Tim to take over Greater Apostolic? ” he joked. “Not just yet, anyway”, laughed the pastor. “I’d love to talk, but I
have to run home and change before dinner. See you boys later.”
Allen and Tim headed out of the church together.
“Hmm…If I didn’t know any better.”
“I just had some philosophical questions.”
“And did you get any answers?”
“Always. Sometimes, it’s not what I expect, but I always get an
answer.”
“Does this mean I can now call you ‘brother Tim’?”
“Wait a minute. You guys have orders?”
“No…never mind. It was a joke. You didn’t get it. So where’s your
car?”
“I took a cab. My vision’s gotten so screwed up, I can’t even drive anymore.”
“That reminds me, how did your appointment go? I wanted to wait until we were face to face to talk about that.”
“I’m not going to mince words, Al. They found something.”
Allen stopped in his tracks. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“Are you sure?”
“Unfortunately. The doctor showed me the scan results.”
“Is it…?”
“They don’t know. I’m going in for the biopsy tomorrow. They’ll have the results by Thursday. No matter what it is, I’m going to have to go under the knife.”
“Maybe this is for the better, man. Just think. If you hadn’t found out and this thing kept growing…”
“Then I could have died happy without having to look over my shoulder every five minutes for the grim reaper.”
“You can’t be serious, man.”
“Allen, I have a brain tumor. Do you have any idea what this means?”
“There are a lot of things that it could mean, but nothing’s certain yet. Let’s just take it one day at a time. That’s the only way you’re going to get through this. You start going into ‘what if’ mode, all you’re going to do is worry yourself sick and make this worse.”
“You’re right.”
“So let’s start with Monday. What’s going to happen with the biopsy?”
“Nothing too serious. They’re just going to drill a hole in my head and stick a needle in my brain, not to mention there’s the possibility that I could end up seizing into a coma. But other than that it should be a walk in the park.”
“You don’t have to worry, man. The doctors have probably done this thing thousands of times. And Presbyterian is the best. Don’t sweat it. It’ll probably only be a few minutes and then you’re done.”
“Try more like an hour. Then they’re going to put me under observation afterward, so it’s more than likely I’ll be in for a few days.”
“What time are you going in? I’ll be there.”
“You don’t have to do that, Al.”
“Tim, I want to. You’re my friend. I’m not going to let you go through this alone.”
“Alright. Thanks, man. It’s at 4:30.”
“Does Miko know yet?”
“Yeah, she called me after I got back to work, but enough about me. How are you doing? You didn’t look so good when I saw you last Sunday. You’re not still bummed out are you?”
“A little. I still feel bad about the mistakes I made, but there’s only so much I can do. I’ve put things in God’s hands I’m going to let Him handle it.”
“I kinda feel bad myself. Seems like Davis wasn’t the hustler I thought he was. Got a lot of pride though. He still hasn’t said anything to you? Even at work?”
“No. I think he even had Mr. Hardy switch his floor assignments so we wouldn’t have to work together anymore.”
“So he has a flair for drama. I think that’s going a bit far, don’t you? It’s not like we all didn’t apologize a million times.”
“In his book, I punked him. That’s not something you take lightly when you’re from round the way.”
“Considering his past, I hope he stays saved for your sake. I’d hate to hear round the ‘hood that you got a ‘mark’ on you.”
“That’s not funny, Tim.”
“Right. Sorry. Anyway, are we actually going to walk all the way to your house? Let’s just grab a cab?”
“Do you really think they’re going to stop for a couple of black guys in Harlem, on a Sunday no less?”
“What if they didn’t know they were stopping for two black guys? What if they only saw one white guy? Or a guy who they thought was a white guy?”
“Tim, no!”
“No, Al. They want to play games, so can we. You know the drill, go
stand over there.”
“You know, one day this is going to get us arrested.”
“The last time I checked, head games weren’t illegal.”
“What if the driver thinks he’s being set up for a stick up and drives
us to the police station?”
“Allen, we’re dressed in suits, and we don’t have firearms.”
“What if the police plant some…?”
“Will you just get over there?!”
Allen stood farther along the sidewalk while Tim walked to the curb to hail the cab. He got one almost immediately. Then while he was asking the driver “if he knew the directions” Allen would walked up and when Tim got in, he got in after him. It always worked, which annoyed the daylights out of Allen. They rode in silence during the short drive to Allen’s house. When they arrived Allen opened the door to find everyone assembled in the living room in lively conversation.
“Speak of the devil, we were just talking about what might have happened to you two”, remarked Vernon.
“How did you get here?” asked Lena.
“We took a cab”, replied Tim.
“Cabs are stoppin’ for black men now?” asked Vernon skeptically.
“It’s a long story. Is that roast chicken with wild rice that’s got this place smelling so good?” asked Allen.
“Yes it is. I was trying to make something that would suit everybody. You think your stomach can handle it, Tim.”
“I’ll be fine Mrs. Sharpe, thank you.”
“Speaking of your stomach, son, have you been to the doctor?” inquired Pastor Bynum.
Allen, Tim, and Tamiko exchanged knowing glances among each other. Tamiko looked down, visibly upset. This did not go unnoticed among the older folk who also exchanged puzzled looks in the silence that ensued.
“Well?” asked Mother Rose breaking the silence.
“There’s nothing to worry about, really. They’re still doing tests to see what the problem is.”
“Maybe you need to see another doctor if this one can’t find out what’s wrong”, suggested Lena.
“Sometimes these things take time. I’m not in a hurry. Anyway, I feel
fine right now. Good enough to have two helpings of chicken.”
“I hear that. Let’s go get some dinner”, said Mr. Sharpe.
They all went into the dinning room for dinner. There wasn’t much talk at the dinner table. The young people were noticeably quiet. The older people were concerned and were thinking of how to steer the conversation so that they could find out what this silence was all about.
“This must be some really good food, Lena. Seems no one can talk for eating.”
“Thank You, Pastor. I think you might be right. Not even your Tamiko has anything to say”, remarked Lena.
“I
’m just tired, Momma Lena. It’s been a long week.”
Silence.
“How’s things going with the Brotherhood Bible study, Allen.”
“Everything’s good.”
Silence.
“How was your vacation, Tim? Did you get to go away at all?”
“No. Just stayed in town.”
Silence.
The conversation went on this way throughout the night, leaving the older folk with perturbed feelings that lingered long after the aroma of seasoned chicken had gone. When dinner was over, the elders tried to extend the evening with dessert, and again attempted to extract any information they could, but it was futile. Finally, Tim excused himself from the company to go home, ending the evening and any chance the elders had to discover what was amiss.
“But it’s still early. Do you have to leave so soon?”
“I’m sorry Mrs. Sharpe, it’s just that I have a lot of things to prepare for tomorrow.”
“Good evening and God bless you, dear.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Sharpe. God bless you, and everyone else. Goodnight.”
Everyone else bid Tim good night, and he left for home hailing another cab at the corner. Once he had gone, Tamiko grabbed Allen and pulled him toward the front door. She took her coat and gave Allen his. Allen played along as he was beginning to understand what she was doing.
“Daddy, Allen and I are going to the store for a minute. I want to get some sunflower seeds for a math game I’m going to play with the kids tomorrow. Do you want anything while we’re out?”
“But we were just about to go, sweetheart. We have to get back to the church for evening service.”
“It’ll only be a minute. We’re only going to the store on the corner. We’ll be back before you know it.”
Once they were outside, Tamiko waited until they were a few feet away before she brought up what they both had been thinking about throughout dinner.
“So did you and Tim have a chance to talk?”
“You mean about his having to go into the hospital tomorrow for a biopsy?”
“I still can’t believe this is happening.”
“I know. You know he already thinks it’s the end.”
“It’s not… Right?”
“I’m going to do just what I told him, Tamiko. I have to take this one day at a time. But we have to be prepared for…”
“No! We can’t go there! We have to be strong for him and go to God and cover him with our prayers! We need to have faith. God can save him! He will save him. He has to…” Tamiko was now sobbing uncontrollably. Allen took her in his arms to comfort her as he struggled to fight back his own tears. It seemed that ever since he devoted his life to God, things had gone from bad to worse. Not only had he lost direction for his own life, but now he was beginning to lose all the people he cared about. First, Jim, then, Callie, then Davis, and now there was the possibility that Tim was terminally ill and would be gone with no hope for return. Allen knew he needed to have faith in God. He had to trust God despite everything that was going on, but he couldn’t help being scared, and a little angry about what God was allowing to happen.
Sixty