Cowboy Up

  "Clayton?"

  He clears his throat.

  "I don't want to rush you," I finally say when it becomes clear he isn't going to stop staring at me mutely. My words get his attention, but I keep going. "I'd marry you tomorrow, but I don't want to rush you."

  "Tomorrow will still be longer than I care to wait."

  "What?"

  "Caroline," he breathes, "I've had that ring for damn near the whole time we've been together. I had you one night and it took everything inside of me to walk away. I might be a foolish man, but when I saw you at the girls' baby shower, I knew I wasn't strong enough to walk away a second time. Every single day since, I've been ready, and every day from this moment will feel like it's not soon enough. Trust me when I say there isn't a damn way to rush somethin' that every second you don't get it feels like a lifetime."

  "Oh," I say lamely.

  "Take the time you need to plan the weddin' you want. Small, big, or in between. Just don't take that much time, darlin'."

  "I won't," I mutter.

  "That's good, Linney. That's damn good."

  He lets me go with a short kiss. Silently, we finish cleaning up and stacking the things he'll pick up later on top of the table. I take one last look at the land around us and feel lighter than I've ever felt in my life. His words from earlier return and I can almost see our future kids running around the green grass. One day, one day that's going to be ours, and I can't hardly wait for it.

  The ride back to the ranch is a lot easier--Onyx proved himself to be trustworthy already. I imagine it will take some time for me to get over my fears, but I no longer look at Onyx as part of that. He's been patient with me and I know, deep down, that Clayton was right when he said there's a bond between the dark beauty and me. During the time I'll have to wait to reopen The Sequel, I hope to learn more from Clayton when it comes to riding. A horse as perfect as Onyx deserves that.

  We pass a few ranch hands working with a couple of Clayton's newer horses in the riding course that's set up between the Davis personal horse barn and the huge one that houses their stock, for lack of a better word, on the way back. Ignoring them, Clayton continues until we both have our feet on the ground and I've finished the last task that he's coached me through in getting Onyx ready to go back in his stall.

  I caress the horse's neck, not really ready to leave. "I'm goin' to be back in the mornin', handsome."

  Clayton laughs. "Handsome?"

  I look over my shoulder at him. "Uh, yeah. Look at him."

  "Such a nut," he mutters, walking Dell down to his own stall.

  "Clay," I hear someone call from outside the barn right before one of the younger cowboys comes in. His eyes go straight to me but shift back to Clayton when Clay makes a disapproving sound deep in his throat. "Sorry, Mr. Davis. Drew had to run to town and you didn't bring your phone or the radio, but your brother's been callin'."

  "For how long?" Clayton questions, walking to me and taking my hand before heading toward the younger man. He pauses to grab his hat, placing it back on his head while waiting for a reply.

  "Reckon 'bout a half hour ago, maybe close to an hour now."

  "Thanks, Tim," Clayton says, walking right out of the barn and toward the house.

  "Is everything okay?" I quicken my pace to keep up with his long legs but feel like I'm more jogging than walking.

  "He knew what was goin' on, darlin'. Only reason he'd be callin' is if it's important. Seein' that Leighton is so close to havin' the baby, I'm guessin' that's why."

  "You'll get to your phone quicker if you go ahead, honey," I rush out, pulling my hand from his hold. "Meet you in the house. I'm goin' to run to my car and grab my phone so I can call Quinn."

  He nods sharply, turning to continue up to the main house. I quickly snatch up my phone before sprinting back toward the house. I pull Quinn's name up and press the phone to my ear before I even reach the porch steps.

  "Are y'all on the way?" she questions when the call connects.

  "About to be. Is everything okay?"

  "I think so. I haven't talked to Maverick since he called to say it was time. We had to wait for Jana to get to the house so she could watch Grayson. Tate's tryin' to get some information with his doctor magic."

  Clayton comes barreling down the hallway, phone to his ear. "That Quinn?"

  I nod. "Here's your brother, Quinn."

  His breathing is harsh when he takes the phone and places it to his ear. "Quinnie?" Whatever she says to him must ease some of the worry, because his shoulders loosen up and he closes his eyes before exhaling slowly. "We're on the way."

  He hands me back my phone and visibly struggles with his emotions. "I'll never be able to hold my shit together when it's you about to have a baby. I feel like I'm too big for my skin right now. I've watched those two fight for this moment for damn near our whole lives. Knowin', like us, they could have never found it because of that shit they had to deal with in order to do so. This baby of theirs is somethin' we've all of us been waitin' for so long to meet. I can't imagine, feelin' this much over their child, what you givin' me one of our own will do to me. Never, not until you, did I ever want this for myself. To my knees, Linney, thinkin' about somethin' as perfect as our future children brings me to my knees."

  "Oh, Clayton." I wrap my arms around him and hug him tight.

  "I don't want to wait either, darlin'," he says against my temple, his head bent and his arms around me. "There's nothin' better than travelin' with you and doin' it in a way that we don't waste a second of our time hesitatin' in takin' what we want. You've got two weeks. Two weeks, and I'm not goin' to wait any longer than that."

  "Two weeks," I echo breathlessly.

  "Not a day more."

  By the time we make it to the hospital, Tate was able to find out that Leigh was being prepped for a cesarean section. Her baby is just too big and the natural birth she's been hoping for is out of the question. Tate assured both Quinn and Clayton that they had nothing to worry about, but even with him explaining how common this is, it's still major surgery. That was almost three hours ago, and even Tate has some worry in his eyes now.

  The tension in our area of the waiting room is thick, but when the doorway opens to reveal a crying, smiling Maverick, that tension vanishes instantly. I look over at Tate and smile, both of us letting the two waiting Davis siblings go to their brother first.

  "Congratulations," Tate says after Clayton and Quinn reach Maverick's side.

  "Huh?" I respond in confusion, not taking my eyes off Clayton. When he grabs his brother by the shoulders and pulls him into his arms, I feel the burn of tears start. When both of them drop their foreheads to the other's shoulder, Clayton's hat falling carelessly at his feet, and both their arms tighten as they embrace, I know I'm not going to be able to keep my tears in as I witness such strong men be overcome by their emotions. Then, as if they practiced the move their whole lives--each man lifts the arm closest to where Quinn is standing out. She moves instantly, all but diving into their embrace with her arms going around each brother.

  "They've been through a lot of shit in their lives," Tate whispers, moving to the seat next to me. "Thick and thin, those three have been each other's rocks through the worst of it, only sharing that responsibility recently. Maverick findin' Leighton. Quinn and me. Now you and Clay. Lot of time has passed since they were young kids livin' a shit life without the love of anyone other than each other, but when you get right down to it, they're always goin' to need each other's support."

  I blink furiously, trying to get my stupid tears to back off, but when Maverick lifts his head and looks at me with his piercing emerald eyes swollen and wet, I feel them start to fall. His don't stop, but he smiles at me with a small nod before bending his head back to his brother's shoulder.

  "Felt that when Gray was born. There's no way to explain what you feel when your child is born. Not sayin' that my son's birth wasn't as important, but for them, this is so much more. Me and you, we weren't
around for all of it, but you know as well as I do that they had a dark childhood. Leighton was there. She loves my wife as a sister. Your man as a brother. And her husband owns the rest of her heart. Those three, they finally have it all, and more importantly, they know it. Makes moments like this hit a little harder because there was a time they all thought this would never happen."

  "Their gifts," I whisper.

  "Pardon?" Tate asks.

  I look away from the huddle across the room and smile at Quinn's husband. "It's their gift for all that ugly they survived."

  I don't think I really believed Clayton when he told me that months ago, but there are no doubts now. I've seen it in Clayton during the course of our relationship, but never as clearly as I do today. I spin the ring on my hand, loving the weight of it, and grin when I realize just how much of a gift my Davis has received today.

  "Yeah, you get it."

  "I do, Tate. I totally do."

  "Like I said, congratulations." He taps my hand, stilling my fingers.

  "Thanks," I breathe, opening my mouth to say more but snapping it shut when I see the siblings release each other and turn to us.

  "That's our cue."

  We both stand and walk over to them.

  "I knew it!" Quinn exclaims with a shake to her voice when her husband reaches her side. "Since I was six years old, Tate. I've always known it."

  I glance at Maverick, seeing him look down at his boots, but not hiding the smile on his face. Clayton pulls me to his side and I wrap one arm around his back, place my other hand against his hard stomach, and tip my head up to look at him. His eyes are wet and red, but his smile is huge.

  "I've got a niece," he tells me in a soft voice full of happiness.

  "I knew it!" Quinn cries out again. "What's her name?"

  Maverick looks up, his lips tipping even further.

  "Promised Leighton I'd let her tell y'all."

  "Well, bucko, what are we waitin' for? Take me to my niece!"

  Maverick smiles at his sister and we all follow the new daddy down the hallway. Clayton's been quiet since his brother came into the waiting room, but every time I glance at him he just smiles, so I leave him to his thoughts, knowing he's anxious to meet the newest member of his family.

  We stop behind Maverick when he reaches a closed door. James, their last name since he took Leighton's when they married, is written under the room number.

  "She's still tired but didn't want to wait," he rumbles low, looking down at his hand on the doorknob. "I'd keep y'all here with us all night, but I'm askin' because I need this time with my wife and daughter. Please, keep it short tonight."

  "I swear, if you don't get your tail outta my way, I'll take you out."

  "Quinn, I mean it."

  I look at her as she rolls her eyes. "I know you do, big brother, and I think you understand that I get you. Now get out of my way so I can see my sister and hold the niece you denied me for years, and then I'll leave."

  Maverick nods at his sister as Tate and I laugh lightly when she starts pushing into the room before the door's even open all the way. Clayton hangs back while Tate enters, causing Maverick to glance his way.

  "I spent ten years worried you'd never come home," Clayton tells Maverick, his words low. "Ten years I felt nothin' but fear that I'd lost my brother because I couldn't protect him enough to keep him here. I'm so happy for you right now. Seein' you overcome all that pushed you away and kept you gone to find what you were always meant to have . . ." He pauses as his arm tightens around my shoulders. "You made it possible with all that for me to be able to see what I was meant to have. I'm so fuckin' proud to call you my brother, Mav."

  "I'm just goin' to . . ." I point toward the open door and try to step out from under Clayton's arm.

  His head tips down to look at me. "Don't you dare move."

  "We're all gettin' what we were meant to have, brother," Maverick says, breaking the staring contest I had apparently entered with Clayton as we both look to him. "You'll be in my shoes sooner rather than later, I reckon." He steps closer to his big brother and lowers his voice. "Don't let me hear you say you didn't protect me again, Clay. You've always done that. You did it when I was a kid, when I left, and you continued doin' it when you look care of Leigh when I didn't. I overcame all that because I had the love of a good woman and the support of you and Quinn. Don't forget it was you who helped me see my way to her. Means the world to hear you're proud of me, seein' that you were the man who taught me how to be one myself."

  I don't hesitate to step away from Clayton when Maverick finishes, walking into the hospital room and leaving them to have the rest of that moment privately.

  An hour later, much to Quinn's irritation, the four of us walk out of the hospital, leaving Leighton and baby Laelynn Quinn James resting peacefully in Maverick's strong arms.

  23

  CAROLINE

  "All My Ex's Live in Texas" by George Strait

  I wave at Marybeth Perkins and back out of the grocery store as quickly as I can without making it look obvious that I'm trying to get away from the sweet, but extremely nosy, older woman. I could tell she was itching for some gossip with the way she kept looking at my stomach. I knew this would happen the second our engagement news started circulating. What should've only taken me fifteen minutes, tops, took close to an hour. Everyone, and I do mean everyone, I encountered asked me a million questions.

  It's been almost two weeks since Clayton asked me to be his wife. I've spent every second of that time planning our wedding and going between our home, Maverick and Leighton's, and Quinn and Tate's. Since both couples have such tiny newborns, I didn't want them coming out to our place. It was just easier to go to them. Plus, this way I get tons of time cuddling babies without having to fight off someone else in order to do so.

  Lucy's been out a few times, Luke as well, but we've had little time to get together like we normally do. They understand, and I know both are happy for me.

  "Caroline."

  I freeze, my body locking tight.

  "Please," the voice continues. Instead of making me feel uneasy, though, the broken tone in his pleading gives me what I need. He doesn't get to feel broken here. He doesn't have that right, seeing as he's the person who did everything in his power to ensure I was the broken one.

  I suck in a cleansing breath before turning. "What do you want, John?"

  He looks terrible. The once handsome man I knew is long gone. His hair is a little too long. His eyes are bloodshot and sunken, with shadowy bags under them. And he's lost weight. Not too much, but enough that I know he's not taking care of himself.

  "I'm so sorry," he rushes out, looking around frantically. "So, so sorry."

  "I moved past needin' to hear that a long time ago, John."

  "It wasn't supposed to be like that," he continues like I didn't even speak.

  I cross my arms and arch a brow, not willing to turn my back and continue loading the car, but I realize my mistake when John's panicked eyes drop. I glance down and see that my left hand and big diamond ring stick out like a billboard announcing my relationship status.

  "Is that . . . Are you . . . to Clay Davis?"

  "Why does it even matter to you?" I sigh, shaking my head. "You have no say in my life, John. You haven't for years. Why now, after all this time, is tellin' me you're sorry so dadgum important?"

  He keeps shaking his head, not looking away from my ring. He mumbles something I can't hear under his breath before looking up at me with worried eyes. "I loved you, you know," he finally says. "I don't know what to do now."

  Clayton's words about John being on drugs filter through my thoughts when I realize how odd he's acting. Knowing what I do about his past here in Pine Oak and having firsthand knowledge about just how violent he can be, I should be blind with fear. Heck, months ago I would have been. But I've come too far to let him push me right back into that person who was afraid of living.

  "I want you to leave me alone. I want
you to leave Clayton alone. And if you're goin' to be livin' in Pine Oak too, then I want you to avoid us at all costs. I survived what you did to me, John. I made it through that, and even though it took me a while to find my reward, I have it, and I'm not goin' to let you try and dirty that up with everything that is you."

  He opens his mouth to say something, but I release my arms and hold one up to stop him silently.

  "I don't want to hear your apologies, because they mean nothin' to me. Just like you. Do you understand that, John?"

  He shakes his head sadly, looking down. "I loved you."

  "No! No, you didn't. You loved owning someone who feared you. You loved the power of breakin' me. You loved you!"

  "You're wrong, Caroline. I've done everything for you."

  I snort. "You must be delusional."

  "Don't marry him. I won't be able to save you."

  This time I laugh in his face. "You? Save me? You're a riot."

  "I tried," he says, but stops and shakes his head.

  "You inflicted pain. Don't get that mixed up. It's been years, John. I've finally moved on and I'm so happy, it's ridiculous. You're sorry? Great. If it's my forgiveness you want or need, then you'll be waiting for a while. You can't give forgiveness to someone you've forgotten. And you, John, are just a forgotten memory."

  I turn my back and load the last four bags into my trunk before shutting it and walking the buggy back to the return. When I start walking back to my car, I don't see him anywhere.

  The first thing I do when I climb into my car is grab my phone and call Clayton.

  "You on your way, darlin'?"

  "I just ran into John."

  Silence.

  "Clayton?"

  "I heard you," he answers with venom in his tone. "He touch you?"

  "What? No, Clayton."

  "What did he want?"

  I sigh, then tell him what happened, trying to remember what John had said, but knowing I probably got some of it wrong. Still, even though it was pretty harmless, I can tell Clayton is about to lose his mind.

  "He wanted to apologize. It doesn't make any sense to me, why he'd feel that's somethin' to be done so many years later, but nevertheless, he did. He startled me only because I wasn't expectin' him, but Clayton, I didn't feel anything but done. I don't fear him or what he did to me anymore."