Wildest Dreams
“It was not my crowning moment,” I retorted sharply.
“Let us see, my wee one, he killed your father, Alyssa, and nearly killed Thad and me. You lived over a month thinking I was dead and drowning in sorrow and guilt for the last thing you did was shriek at me. He imprisoned your mother, was the architect of a number of faceless soldier’s deaths –”
“All right, all right,” I cut him off, “I get it but hello? Frey? Remember awhile back when I lectured thousands of people about mercy? And, there I was, getting in Broderick’s face about –”
He lifted a hand to my jaw, thumb to my lips and he pressed lightly.
Then he said softly, “You will note it was not me who stood up when Viola was being pelted with ice missiles and demanded mercy for her and it was not me because her actions meant I stood to lose you. With Broderick, you thought you had actually lost me and you knew you again lost a father. I think succeeding in four short days in bringing him low and setting the rebellion into disarray, you can excuse yourself for gloating.”
Well.
I had to admit, he had a point.
I decided not to respond.
Frey knew why and grinned.
Then his grin faded, his hand slid to my neck and he said quietly, “We must speak of what I did to you.”
I shook my head. “No,” I replied. “All’s well that ends well and, thank God, it’s ended well so no, Frey, we never have to speak of it.”
“You say this, Finnie, because you still hold the pain of guilt, all that time you thought I was lost. That dark shadow runs deep in you, my wee one. I see it at times, drifting across your eyes when you look at me.”
“Frey –”
“But had we not been attacked in the middle of that episode, you would have been entitled to an explanation, wife, and you still are.”
I tried to waylay him by explaining, “I know that it’s, uh… law, um… here, in this world, for the man to decide if birth control is used or not and if the woman doesn’t adhere to his, uh… decision she can be sentenced to serve the realm.” Frey stared at me and I finished. “Uh… I told Aurora everything that night after Father… after we put Father… when his boat…” I sucked in breath. “Well, that night Mother drank two bottles of wine all by herself and I fell asleep while she did it and so did she and you had to carry both of us to bed, I told her what happened and she explained it to me.”
“This is not the same in your world,” he guessed.
Women who did or did not take birth control against their male partner’s wishes serving a term of nine months sentenced to do light work in castles, hospitals or orphanages?
Uh… crazy!
“No,” I confirmed. “It’s the woman’s choice unless she’s married and then they decide together and until they do… well, she just takes it, mostly. I don’t know, I’ve, uh… never been married until, well… now.”
Carefully, Frey stated, “You hid taking it from me.”
I blinked in confusion before, equally carefully, I replied, “No, honey, I didn’t. I don’t know why you’d think that but I guess you just were never around when I took it.”
He nodded before he reminded me gently, “All right, Finnie, but we discussed it with you approaching the subject within twenty-four hours of my return to you after I was at sea.”
“I know, Frey, because we were set to have sex within twenty-four hours after your return to me and, at that time, I thought I was going home and I didn’t want to do it pregnant or with a newborn who’d never see his or her father again.”
He studied me for long moments.
Then he muttered, “I misinterpreted this,” but as he did, he held my eyes.
I smiled at him and said softly, “I gathered that.”
His eyes dropped to my mouth then his hand shifted up so his thumb could stroke my cheekbone as his eyes lifted back to mine.
Then he whispered, “I was in love with you when I ordered the elves to bind you to me.”
My body stiffened slightly under his and I shook my head and whispered, “Frey –”
“It is true I didn’t know it,” he interrupted me. “All I knew was when Nillen told me you were set to leave, I couldn’t abide that. Nillen warned me there would be consequences but I decided I would accept whatever they were as long as I knew you could never leave me.” His face dipped closer and his voice dipped lower when he went on, “You already had a hold on my heart, Finnie. You must believe I would not have done what I did if that wasn’t true.”
“You barely knew me,” I pointed out quietly.
“I knew you were beautiful. I knew you smelled good. I knew you filled out a gown very nicely. I knew you could cook. I knew your cheeks got pink and your eyes lit when you were excited. I knew in just weeks you made friends, you chattered brightly, you were interested in me, you smiled easily, you laughed readily, you would come to my defense when you thought I faced danger, you responded to my touch and,” he grinned, “you did that wildly.”
I rolled my eyes.
Frey kept talking so I rolled them back.
“And I left you alone in my cabin and you didn’t just survive, you thrived so I knew you were an uncommon woman, an uncommon woman who would match me. So I knew you, Finnie, and I bound you to me knowing I wanted to know you more and knowing I would like having a lifetime of that discovery.”
Oh my God, did he just say that?
I stared at him, my heart in my throat.
He said it.
Then, my voice husky, I started to threaten, “Frey Drakkar, if you make me cry –”
He cut me off. “But what I didn’t know until later was when the elves bound you to this world, they also bound you to me so when I returned from their realm, I knew where you were, I sensed you, I could find you, I went right to you, taking the dragons with me. I sent a messenger to bring my men to me so they would be safe from the dragon’s fire then, as you ran with your witches through the forest, I knew exactly where you were so the fire I aimed from my beasts never got near you.”
That was when I blinked and breathed, “Really?”
He grinned again and whispered, “Really.”
“Cool.” I whispered back, still on a breath and watched my husband’s grin get bigger.
Then his face grew soft and his warm eyes roamed my own as he muttered, “By the gods, I hope you never lose your wonder for all that is life, my wee Finnie.”
“Well, as long as I’m in a world with fire breathing dragons, magical elves, hot guys who are impervious to extreme heat and fantastic ships straight out of a movie that are named after me, I don’t think that’s gonna happen,” I told him and his head tilted to the side.
“Straight out of a what?”
I cupped his jaw, lifted my head and touched my mouth to his.
Then I dropped my head back down to the pillow and whispered, “I’ll explain later.”
The look in his eyes shifted, that shift corresponded to a tingle someplace really good and his hand slid from my jaw, down my neck, my chest and my side as he murmured, “You will?”
“Unh-hunh,” I agreed, pressing my body to his as my hands moved on him and his head dipped closer, his nose sliding along mine.
“When?” he asked quietly.
“Later,” I answered, hooking a leg around his hip.
His lips came so close I could feel his breath on mine but his eyes stayed open and held mine captive.
“So then, what are we going to do now?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” I said breathily. “Do you have any ideas?”
“A few,” he answered, his voice slightly gruff, his hand sliding back up my side to cup my breast.
I drew in a soft breath.
“I think I might like your ideas,” I told him.
“I know you will,” he told me.
“Sure of yourself?” I teased, his thumb slid across my nipple, my back arched and I drew in a breath that was not at all soft.
“Yes,” he a
nswered, his eyes smiling but still lit with that lazy, sexy light.
One of my hands slid up the sleek skin of his back and into his hair. “You could tell me what it’s like in the elves’ realm,” I suggested.
“Later,” he whispered, his lips still close, his thumb now circling my nipple.
I bit my lip as the sensations curled through me and I waited, breathlessly, for his mouth to take mine.
When I didn’t get it, I prompted on a whisper, “Seriously, baby, are you going to kiss me, or what?”
My husband made me wait half a second while, super close, he looked deep in my eyes.
Then, just like Frey, he gave me what I wanted.
He kissed me.
* * * * *
Incidentally, I slept soundly that night and, except on a rare occasion, every night after.
* * * * *
One month later…
In the Queen’s Study, Rimée Keep, Snowdon.
I stood silently at the window in my mother’s study, my body facing it but my head was turned so I could see the people at the desk.
Frey, Calder, Apollo, Olwen, Norfolk and Walter were standing at one side, the heads of three once Lunwynian, then Middlelandian, again Lunwynian Houses stood at the other side. All three had not participated in the rebellion and, for their refusal to support that campaign, they had all been imprisoned throughout the short war by Broderick then the other heads.
Now, they were not.
Mother stood behind the desk, bent over it, signing a huge, poster board-sized piece of parchment.
Baldur stood next to her watching her with a stony face.
She straightened and offered her silver pen to him.
His lip curled as he looked at the pen.
“Do not delay, Baldur,” Apollo said low. “Your carriage awaits and the rest of us have things to do.”
Baldur glared at Apollo then he looked to Mother.
“It is my understanding, my son showed kindness to your daughter before she slaughtered him,” he noted coldly.
Mother didn’t show any reaction to this pointless comment which was a miracle considering all the other things that were not kind that Broderick did, including ordering her (and my) husband to be murdered and she stated blandly, “And it is my understanding she actually didn’t slaughter him, she delivered a wound that was not lethal but, instead, it was one of the men of The Drakkar, acting correctly on what he felt would be his absent commander’s wishes, who ran your son through.” She paused then finished, not even trying to hide her pride, “But she did, of course, take the life of his lover.”
Baldur’s mouth got tight and his eyes slid through the heads on either side, avoiding mine as they went and then he whispered, “This is preposterous. This woman does not even have the blood of a Wilde and she’s a woman for the gods’ sakes.”
“Your options have been explained, Baldur,” Frey reminded him quietly. “You made your choice. With this delay, are you saying you’re undecided?” Baldur’s eyes went to Frey and Frey concluded, “For if you are, I will be happy to make the choice for you.”
“My choice has not changed,” Baldur snapped and I was guessing it wouldn’t for his choices were abdicating all claim to his throne by signing that paper and then immediately leaving on his journey to be exiled to a small island somewhere south, far away from here or a trial for impeachment which might end in a lifelong exile not on a sunny isle but in a cold dungeon. “But it is my due and I wish it to be known that you and your heads have acted well beyond the bounds of decency and respect. Dragon fire and trials of treason for heads of Houses? It is ridiculous. These are games of politics as they have been played for centuries.”
“We are moving into a new era,” Aurora announced softly, her eyes on Baldur, “where politics do not include assassinations and clashes of steel but diplomacy. And the heads who remain are enthusiastic about Lunwyn’s bright future.”
Baldur’s eyes narrowed on her and he snapped, “At your command, you will lead the new Lunwyn to misery and my people will revolt.”
“We shall see,” Aurora murmured then her face brightened slightly. “Though, in opening your treasury, abolishing your paper currency and allowing our reunited citizens to trade their paper currency for coin, they seem to be quite content at the moment.”
Baldur’s face got red and I pressed my lips together to stop myself from smiling and looked out the window so I missed Baldur yanking the pen out of Aurora’s hand. I heard the scribble of the squib on parchment and I also heard movement as he stomped out.
I did not look back until Mother spoke.
“Gentlemen, if you would,” she invited and I watched her motion nobly to the oval table in the corner of the room.
The heads moved there with Mother. Frey and Apollo moved to me. When they arrived, they stopped close and Frey’s hand slid to the small of my back.
“Do you wish to stay, my Finnie?” he asked quietly and I scrunched my nose.
“Attend a meeting?” I asked back and he smiled at me before he turned his smile to an openly amused Apollo.
“Not exciting enough for my wee wife,” he muttered to Apollo.
Apollo’s response was an amused, rumbling, “Mm.”
“You two enjoy,” I mumbled.
“Right,” Apollo murmured, looking like he wanted to attend this meeting about as much as I did.
“And your plans?” Frey asked and my eyes went to his.
“Check in on Sky. He’s taking a test, he should be finishing up about now. And Bess is leaving.”
He nodded. “Then you should be away.”
“I should be away,” I agreed.
His eyes warmed, his head dropped and he touched his mouth to mine before again lifting his head.
“I shall see you later,” he muttered, looking over his shoulder at the conference table.
“Okay, honey,” I whispered, lifted my hand touched his chest and his eyes came back to me so I smiled.
His hand tensed at my back then he moved away.
I turned to Apollo and smiled at him too then my smile went wonky as he held my eyes but took hold of my hand and lifted it, knuckles up, to his lips. Then I watched as he brushed them with his lips and dropped our hands but kept firm hold of mine.
“Until we meet again, sweet Finnie,” he whispered gently and I felt my mouth go soft.
“Until we meet again, Apollo,” I whispered back, squeezing his fingers.
He made to let go but I held on tight and moved slightly closer.
Then I said quietly, “A wise woman once told me happiness is a line with contentment at one end and bliss on the other.” I squeezed his fingers again and went on fervently, “I hope you at least find a way to the middle of that line, Apollo.”
His lips tipped up slightly before his head turned and I knew he was looking at Frey when he looked back to me and I saw his remarkable eyes lit with an appealing light before he replied, “I have, my princess, just knowing you have moved up that line to bliss.”
My belly warmed.
“Apollo,” I whispered.
“Hold tight to it, my sweet,” he replied softly. “Every day is a gift.”
He knew and so did I. We knew this to be very true.
I just wished there was some way this wonderful man would open his heart to a woman who would be generous to it. But I knew like I knew when I thought I had lost Frey that this was impossible.
I nodded, his lips tipped up more, his fingers squeezed mine then he let me go and moved away.
I watched and saw Frey watching us. I smiled at him as his eyes slid to Apollo then back to me, they warmed and he smiled gently back. I looked to Mother who inclined her chin to me, her lips curled slightly then she looked back at the table.
I left the room and hurried to the side entrance to Rimée Keep, hoping Bess was not yet away.
When I exited, I saw she was not but the carriage was loaded, the horses put to and she was standing beside it fretting.
br /> Her head turned and her face lit when she saw me. “Oh Finnie! There you are!”
She rushed to me as I moved to her and we took hold of each other’s hands.
“Your trunks are packed, everything is ready and –” she started but I interrupted her.
“Bess, I’ll be fine,” I told her.
“I know, but, the other girls –”
“The other girls are hopefully enjoying a much needed break like you’re about to.”
She looked at me and grinned so I grinned back because we both knew Jocelyn and Esther were undoubtedly enjoying their breaks for they were both in Houllebec in the company of their men, Thad and Oleg.
Where Frey and I were headed the next morning and I was glad of it.
My feet most definitely itched.
Then her smile faded and she whispered, “I’ll miss you, my sweet princess.”
I dropped her hands but pulled her into my arms for a hug and whispered in her ear, “And I’ll miss you, my sweet Bess, but it’s only a short time and soon we’ll all be back together again and off to face our next adventure.” I squeezed hard then let her go and stepped back. “Now, go. Spend time with your family and I’ll see you very soon.”
She nodded, grinned at me again then part skipped, part dashed to the carriage, taking the hand of the footman waiting there for her. He helped her in, closed the door and she leaned out the window and waved at me as the footman ordered the driver, “Away.”
“Farewell, Finnie!” she called, waving as the carriage rolled forward.
“Farewell, Bess!” I called back, waving too.
Then I watched and waved as the carriage continued to move until it disappeared around the castle. And I kept looking in that direction, seeing the frost city of Snowdon now embedded in the deep green of the short Lunwyn summer. The ice and snow were gone, the land was lush and vibrant and, Frey told me, this would be the way for another month or so before the snows again came and bound the nation in ice.
I turned to the doors, went through and immediately encountered a scowling Kell who was stomping toward me.
“Hey Kell,” I greeted when he got close and we both stopped.
“Where’s Frey?” he grunted, not greeting me when we both stopped.