Emma's Secret

  ‘Thanks, goodnight, Milton,’ Tessa said as she alighted. She gave him a faint smile and asked him to come for her at eight the following morning. He said he would and bid her goodnight.

  Running up the front steps, she let herself into the house, calling as she usually did, ‘Adele! Cooee! Where’s my little girl?’

  A split second later Adele came running into the entrance hall, shouting, ‘Mumma! Mumma! I’m here!’

  Crouching down, arms outstretched, Tessa caught her child as she hurtled forward into her embrace. Adele kissed her cheek and snuggled closer.

  After a moment, Tessa held the little girl away from her. ‘How’s my sweetiepie?’

  ‘I’m fine. Daddy’s here.’

  The words had hardly left the child’s mouth when Mark’s shadow fell across them. He stood in the archway that led through into the large kitchen.

  Looking up at him, smiling, Tessa saw that his face was cold, his eyes angry. He seemed somehow menacing to her. Although her smile congealed, she said evenly, ‘Hello, darling, you’re home early.’

  ‘And you’re late. As always,’ he murmured, his tone quiet but icy.

  Standing up, taking hold of Adele’s hand, Tessa said, ‘It’s only six, Mark. Come on, Adele, let’s go and find Elvira.’ As she spoke she took off her cape and threw it on the bench in the entrance hall.

  Elvira, the young nanny, was stacking the dishwasher, and she looked up and smiled at Tessa and Adele as they came into the kitchen together. ‘Hello, Mrs. Longden, Adele ate well tonight. She’s just had a nice supper. Steamed vegetables and a small piece of grilled sole. And raspberries for dessert.’

  ‘It sounds delicious. Thanks, Elvira. You look after her so well.’

  ‘Good nutrition, Mrs. Longden.’ Closing the dishwasher, Elvira added, ‘I’ll take her upstairs in a few minutes to get her ready for bed.’

  ‘Oh I can do that,’ Tessa replied quickly. Looking down at Adele, she went on, ‘Shall I read you a story, darling?’

  ‘Oh yes, Mumma. Please.’

  ‘I need to talk to you. Right now, Tessa,’ Mark said, suddenly looming over her.

  ‘But I want to read a story to Adele. Can’t it wait a few minutes?’

  ‘No, it cannot.’

  There was such a nasty undertone in his voice, Tessa nodded, and then bent over Adele, murmured. ‘Daddy needs me. I’ll come up shortly. Elvira can get you ready and then I’ll come and read the story to you before you go to sleep.’

  Adele smiled up at her mother, whom she adored.

  Taking hold of her arm, Mark led Tessa across the hall into the library, closing the door behind them. This was yet another room in the house that Tessa loathed. She found it cold, dark and depressing, rarely entered it.

  ‘What’s so important that it couldn’t wait a few minutes?’ Tessa asked, looking at Mark, smiling, wanting to keep everything calm between them.

  ‘I want to talk to you about the hours you keep,’ he answered. ‘You stay at that damned store far too late, and you work too hard. And some good it’s all going to do you.’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘She’s not going to leave anything to you. Paula O’Neill doesn’t care about you. Linnet’s her favourite. She’s the love child, born out of Shane’s loins. Did you know he was her lover before your father was even dead? She was screwing him when she was on her business trips to New York…when you were left behind in England with the help. And did you—’

  ‘That’s not true!’ Tessa exclaimed, automatically defending her mother. ‘I know Mummy and Shane were friends then, in fact they have been friends all their lives, since they were children. They grew up together in Yorkshire. You’re being ridiculous. I won’t have you talk about my parents like that.’

  ‘Oh. Shane’s suddenly a parent, is he?’

  ‘He did bring me up, Mark, and he was kind and loving. I was only a small child when Jim Fairley was killed in the avalanche.’

  ‘And wasn’t that convenient for your mother and her lover. An avalanche. An act of God!’

  ‘Oh stop this! You’re being disgusting. And God knows where you got that kind of information. Why it’s…almost libellous.’

  ‘No it’s not, because it’s true. And I got it from a very good source.’

  ‘Who?’

  ‘I never reveal my sources. Rule of the game, you know.’

  Tessa glared at him. ‘I demand to know who is making these scurrilous remarks to you about my mother and Shane.’

  ‘A little dicky bird. Look, why don’t you ask her yourself. Ask her about her weekends in New Milford, Connecticut. The long weekends she spent with Shane in his barn there.’

  Tessa shifted slightly in the chair, frowning. She stared at Mark and then looked away, puzzled and disturbed by his stories.

  He broke the silence, saying suddenly, ‘You won’t get to be head of the stores, believe me you won’t. And you won’t get to inherit Pennistone Royal either. Linnet’s going to get it all. Poor little you, you’re the one who’s going to get a royal screwing.’ He laughed coldly.

  ‘I don’t believe any of this,’ Tessa said, striving to keep her voice steady. But she was upset, shaking inside, and she wondered if there was any truth in what he was saying. Abruptly, she jumped up, walked towards the door. ‘I’m going to read to Adele.’

  ‘Not so fast,’ he cried, striding across the room, grabbing her arm before she could reach the door. He pulled her into his arms, and kissed her, forcing his tongue into her mouth. With his free hand he locked the door. He walked her over to the sofa, and pulled her down with him, throwing a leg over her, pressing his face against hers. In her ear he said, ‘I’m going to give you a royal screwing right now, Tessa, my love.’ He fumbled with her white silk shirt, and growing impatient with the buttons he simply ripped it down the front, put his hand in her bra and got hold of her breast. He brought his mouth to it, kissed the nipple, and then suddenly he bit it.

  Tessa screamed, struggled with him, pushed him away, and sat up. Slender though she was, she worked out every day and she had amazing strength in her arms. She gave him a sudden hard shove and he rolled off the narrow sofa onto the floor.

  ‘You bloody bitch,’ he shouted.

  ‘You hurt me, Mark,’ she said quietly, at once conciliatory, knowing his temper was about to flare up. ‘Why did you bite me?’

  He struggled to his feet without responding.

  Standing herself, Tessa edged toward the door. He caught hold of her arm, almost wrenching it out of its socket. ‘Don’t spend too much time with Adele,’ he murmured, his voice unexpectedly soft. ‘I have an urgent need for you tonight. You’re going to have to meet your wifely obligations.’

  ‘I always do, Mark darling,’ she whispered.

  His answer was to grab hold of her hand and press it against his crotch. ‘See what you do to me? Come on, Tess, let’s have a quickie now. Right there on the sofa. The door’s locked. No one can get in.’

  ‘Later, Mark darling.’ She leaned into him, kissed him lightly on the mouth. ‘Let me deal with Adele first.’

  He took her face between his hands, squeezing it hard, so hard it hurt, and tears sprang into her eyes. ‘Don’t be too long,’ he hissed. ‘Otherwise I might have to—’

  ‘Have to what?’ she cut in.

  He did not answer. He merely gave her a cold stare in return, let go of her, walked across to the door and unlocked it. ‘Be my guest,’ he said, his voice menacing again.

  Tessa hurried out and ran upstairs, fastening her jacket. She almost stumbled into Adele’s room, and then took a deep breath, calmed herself. With a smile she walked towards the bed, saying, ‘And what story shall I read to you tonight, darling?’

  ‘Anything you want, Mumma.’ Adele patted the bed. ‘Sit here.’

  Tessa did as she said, picking up one of the books on the beside table, opening it.

  Adele leaned closer to her mother, and touched her cheeks. ‘Why are you crying, Mumma?’
she whispered. ‘What’s wrong?’

  ‘Nothing, sweetiepie.’ Tessa smoothed her cheeks with her fingertips and then wrapped her arms around her daughter, holding her close.

  Twenty minutes later, when Adele had fallen asleep, Tessa turned out the lamp but left on the night light, and slipped out of the room quietly.

  Walking slowly downstairs she took total control of her emotions, and went into the library. Mark was sitting at his desk, going through the mail, and he glanced up, instantly smiled at her. ‘I’m so sorry,’ he murmured, getting up, coming towards her. ‘I hope I didn’t hurt you?’

  She shook her head. It was not unusual for him to be suddenly calm after the storm. He had strange mood swings these days, was erratic, went from being angry to loving.

  He said, ‘I don’t know what gets into me sometimes. I suppose it’s overwork, stress, pressures. Forgive me?’

  ‘Yes, Mark. But why did you say those things about my mother? Why did you say I’m not going to inherit?’

  ‘It was just some gossip I heard about your mother. Forget it, darling. I really shouldn’t have repeated it. I was wrong.’

  ‘Why won’t you tell me who told you?’

  ‘It’s not anyone you know, some American chap who was here from New York. He claims he knew Shane in those days, when Shane was running the American end of O’Neill Hotels International. Let’s forget it, okay?’

  ‘All right. But it wasn’t very nice, I mean the things he said about Mummy.’

  ‘Oh I know. And as I said, I was wrong to repeat them. Look, let’s go out to dinner, shall we? Why don’t we go to Harry’s Bar? Go and change, and I’ll try and get a table for nine o’clock. Please, Tessa.’

  ‘That’ll be nice, going out,’ she murmured. ‘I’ll go and get ready.’

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  ‘I have only one question for you,’ Linnet said, pausing in the middle of Chester Street, staring up at Julian.

  ‘Yes?’ he responded, looking down at her, thinking how lovely she looked in the lamplight, curbing the desire to kiss her passionately. ‘And what’s that?’

  ‘How did you manage to get past security at the back door of the store, and up to my office without anybody phoning me?’

  Amused by the question, he began to laugh. ‘Joe Pinkerton was on duty at the staff entrance, and he’s known me since I was a toddler. So obviously he let me through.’

  ‘I see.’

  Noting her sudden snippy tone, and not wishing to get a senior staff member into trouble, he quickly added, ‘But Joe did ask me to sign the book.’

  ‘I’m glad to hear it.’

  ‘Also, I mentioned I was coming to pick you up,’ Julian thought to add, watching her face carefully.

  ‘And how did Joe react to that?’ she asked, her voice a fraction milder.

  ‘He smiled, and winked, and—’

  ‘You see! Someone else assuming we’re a couple!’

  ‘Well, we are. We always have been and hopefully we always will be, whatever you think. And what’s wrong with that anyhow?’ he demanded, his voice rising sharply, an irate gleam entering his blue eyes.

  Linnet continued to stare up at him, looking slightly put out, and she was about to make another sharp retort when spontaneously he grabbed hold of her shoulders, pulled her to him and kissed her fully and deeply on the mouth.

  For a moment Linnet resisted, tried to push him away, and then suddenly, unexpectedly, and much to her amazement, she crumbled. Clinging to him fiercely, her arms around his neck, her resistance to him dissolved. She began to return his kisses with a passion which equalled his, surprising herself as well as Julian.

  After a moment or two, they reluctantly drew apart, stood gaping at each other, both of them startled, for the same reason: Her unbridled response to him after weeks of cool and forbidding distance was a total turnabout, almost shocking in its own way.

  Julian touched her cheeks, lightly, with his fingertips and murmured, ‘Come on, I’ve got a surprise for you.’ As he spoke he tucked her arm through his, and they continued down the street in the direction of his apartment. Once they were inside the entrance hall of the remodelled townhouse, he kissed her softly on the mouth again; then, taking her hand, he hurried her up the flight of stairs to the next floor.

  ‘What kind of surprise?’ she asked at last, her curiosity finally getting the better of her.

  Julian Kallinski simply smiled enigmatically, said nothing, and led her directly to his front door. After unlocking it, he ushered her inside, slammed the door behind them with his foot, and took her in his arms once more, his mouth finding hers.

  Continuing to kiss her, he began to pull off her heavy topcoat, dropped it to the floor, then shrugged out of his own, let it fall, and they half-walked, half-stumbled towards the living room, still kissing each other.

  The room was in darkness except for a pool of light from a small, silk-shaded lamp and the lambent flames from the fire burning in the hearth.

  ‘Our separation is over,’ Julian announced, impatiently taking off her suit jacket, throwing it on a chair, leading her towards the fire.

  ‘But—’

  ‘No buts,’ he cried, putting two fingers on her lips to silence her, then he took her face between his hands, and stared deeply into her eyes. It was a face he loved, had loved since they were children. Heart-shaped, with high cheekbones and a broad brow, it was perfectly sculpted, the lines fine, delicate. She had sweeping auburn brows above those marvellous, deep-green eyes, balanced by the widow’s peak which came down onto her forehead in a dramatic vee. Her colouring was so vivid, so unique, it was heartstopping.

  He had always loved her bright red-gold hair, and when her siblings and some of her cousins had called her ‘carrot top’ and ‘red pepper’, teasing her unmercifully when they were all growing up, he had angrily shouted rude comments back at them, forever defending her. And he had taken her to one of their secret places, where he had kissed the tears off her cheeks, kissed her small, capable hands, repeatedly told her she was the most beautiful of all girls. It was Gideon who usually came to find them, and he, too, hugged and comforted her, and encouraged her in her defiance of the others. They were her stalwart champions, the two of them.

  Now Julian said, very slowly, ‘I’ve loved you all of my life, Linnet O’Neill. I’ll always love you. Until the day I die I’ll love you, and even after that. And I cannot go on like this. Very simply, I won’t. We have to be together again, and immediately. I can’t bear being away from you, I can’t live like this, I just can’t tolerate the separation you imposed.’

  She gazed at him, saw the sincerity written on his face, the desperation in his eyes. But she remained silent, afraid to say anything, because she knew the wrong word would make him blow up. He was obviously at the end of his patience.

  ‘Tell me you truly want to end our relationship,’ he said after a moment, ‘tell me to go away forever, and I will. I promise I’ll never bother you again. Tell me you don’t love me any more, Linnet O’Neill, and I’ll go.’

  Looking him straight in the eye, she cried, ‘Of course I love you, Julian! I always have, but you see, it’s—’

  ‘No!’ he shouted, more in frustration than annoyance. ‘This ridiculous nonsense has to stop, do you hear? I am putting a stop to it right now. I’m taking a stand, Linnet. I just won’t accept this from you any longer. This is an ultimatum. Either we go back to our normal relationship or I’m getting out…I’m jumping ship!’

  He had spoken so harshly to her she was taken aback, and she visibly recoiled, startled by the authority in his voice, the look of absolute determination on his face. And suddenly she knew, at this precise moment, that if she continued her campaign to keep him at arm’s length, to stall the relationship, to put him off with endless excuses, she would lose him forever.

  Julian had just shown her that he was in earnest. Deadly serious, in fact, and she understood deep within herself that he was far too proud to be treated with the k
ind of indifference she had been meting out. He was too much in love with her to stand for the separation she had imposed, too much of a man, too strong and virile, too self-confident to be bullied by her. No weakling, he.

  Unexpectedly, she realized with a sudden rush of clarity that she was risking the relationship, that she somehow had to make amends to him. Now. At once. Not tomorrow. Tomorrow would be too late. She had pushed him too far, too hard, to the very limit, and his patience was at an end. That was patently obvious from his tone, the stance he had taken, the hard glint reflected in his blue eyes, the tight set of his generous mouth.

  Linnet took a step forward and put her arms around him. Standing on tiptoe, she kissed him lightly on the mouth. Holding his hand in hers, she gently pulled him towards the fire.

  ‘Take this off,’ she murmured, touching the lapel of his jacket.

  He did as she asked, and in one movement threw it to one side, stepped closer, and took her in his arms very forcefully. His mouth sought hers hungrily, and they kissed for a long time, and then they sank down onto the rug in front of the blazing fire, wrapped in each other’s arms.

  Pushing himself up on his elbow all of a sudden, Julian gazed at her for a long moment, frowning, trying to read her face.

  She saw the question in his eyes and asked, ‘What is it, Julian?’

  ‘Are you sure?’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘Sure about this? Being here with me like this? Are you sure about ending the separation, coming back to me? Sure about us?’

  ‘Yes, I’m sure,’ she whispered, reaching up, touching his face, her eyes spilling her love for him.

  He nodded his understanding; a smile flickered fleetingly on his mouth and was gone. He wanted her so much; he always had. He began to smooth his hand over her breasts. They were suddenly taut beneath the thin silk of her shirt, and her nipples stood erect as they hardened. Just as he himself was erect and rapidly hardening. He bent over her, sucked at her nipple through the silk, staining it, then unbuttoned her shirt, took a breast out of her lacy bra. His mouth came down on her warm flesh, and he kissed her breast tenderly. He breathed in the warmth of her.