Peace Love Resistance
Tristan spun on her heels and stopped, causing a crash between us. She twisted her lips to the side, but failed to hide the smile or the amusement. “He’s fine, T.”
“Then why you laughing at me?”
“I’m not laughing at you, Baby. My heart is going through some sort of exuberant, fiery, intense, transformation, and sometimes you make it explode. Like now. Nana May is a kid magnet. Wait until you see all the kids gather around her camper. She’s constantly doing something with them, and guess what else she does?” she questioned, her tone lowering to something sultry and sexy. Sexy?
My hands went around her waist and my lips gravitated toward hers. “What?”
“She babysits so the grownups can have some grownup time.”
I pulled back with that, hoping like hell I was hearing her right, my tone portraying more excitement than I meant to show. “You can have sex?”
Tristan giggled and kissed me. “Not your way, but you’ll like it. I promise. Come on.”
“Wait,” I resisted, my hand pulling her back to me ,and my eyes going to the lady going all goo-goo over Baby-T.
“What, T? He’s fine. Do you think I’m not aware enough to know who I can trust with my baby? Her energy is as pure as his. He’s in good hands.”
I let her pull me away and lied. “Okay, but that wasn’t what I was going to say. I wanted to know more about this grownup thing.”
“Oh you will.”
“But we’re not leaving him with her or anyone. He has his own room with a pirate ship curtain. We’re keeping him.”
“We’re not leaving him anywhere, T. Stop it.”
Two girls around the age of ten, looking exactly alike came running to Tristan, both calling out her name in excitement.
Tristan hugged them both, one on each side. “Hi, girls. How are you?”
“Where’s the new baby?”
“Nana May has him. You can go say hi if you want.”
“Are we going to build a labyrinth here?”
“Of course we can. We’ll find a nice spot in the woods, maybe later, okay?”
“Okay.”
And they were off, running to check out the new baby. Next a rather large dude with a big burley beard walked toward us. His three-hundred-pound body wobbled and his belly jiggled, but Tristan didn’t seem to mind. She flung her arms right around his neck and he pulled her into a big bear hug, her feet leaving the ground in a spin.
“Hey, Teddy-Bear. Good to see you. How are you?”
“I’m good, Tristan. You look amazing. You sure you just had a baby?”
Of course I cleared my throat. I wasn’t going to let some fat-ass hit on my girl right in front of my own eyes.
As soon as contact was broken from their over affectionate hug, Tristan’s hand went right into mine. “Oh, sorry. I keep doing that. This is Tobias. He’s sort of mine.”
And then my heart exploded with the same poetic stuff she’d just told me about. I extended a fist, and the guy smiled at me, releasing the ego from around my throat.
“Good to meet ya. I’m Fin, but everyone calls me Teddy-Bear for whatever reason. This is my wife, Annie,” he said, his arm raising for his wife.
Annie wasn’t a small girl either, but she was very pretty. Her eyes were a blue that I’d never seen before, not with her shiny black hair and dark skin. She was stunning even if she was a little over weight. “Hi, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” she said to me, but with her amazing eyes on Tristan. “Didn’t I tell you if it was meant to be, he’d find you?”
Tristan gave her a look and I knew what it meant. It was the same look my mom used when she wanted me to shut up without saying it with words. Of course that bothered me and a sudden anxious feeling came over me. What if he was there? This whole weekend could go south in the blink of an eye. What if he wanted to see him? What if I wanted to beat the hell out of him?
She totally dodged the question, skipped right over it and moved onto their own girls. “I can’t believe how big Jodi and Joni have gotten in two months. What are you feeding them?”
“Miracle Grow,” Teddy-Bear answered.
“Did they hit you up about building a Labyrinth again?” Annie questioned.
“Of course. This will make what? Five?”
“For you. We have to leave one everywhere we go. I think we’re up to twelve,” Annie said with a proud mama bear smile.
“Yeah, see what you started,” Teddy-Bear complained, him not with a smile, more like a frown.
Tristan poked him in his fat belly, her head tilting to the side in amusement. “You’ve lost some weight, so you just keep on picking up those rocks and helping those girls.”
“You know I will. Want to have a safety meeting?”
I swear my ears popped up, hoping like hell safety meetings meant the same thing everywhere.
“Nah, I can’t. Breastfeeding.”
Annie perked up with that, her hands clapping in excitement. “I want to see him.”
“Come on. I’ll show you. He’s so perfect, Annie. I’m so in love with him it’s ridiculous.”
“Ahh, I love that, and I love that he didn’t end up being a girl. I want to hear everything.”
I just stood there, watching the two of them walk away.
“Coming, T?” Tristan questioned, stopping a few feet away from me, noticing that I didn’t follow.
“I’ll wait here.”
Tristan smiled after me with a wink. “Of course you will.”
Her Godzilla friend turned to me and made my day. “You hooked yourself a good one. Want to burn one?”
“Uh, yeah,” I assured my new best friend.
“Come on. Let’s burn this place to the ground.”
Yes!
Chapter Eighteen
Some guy named Willy, flying solo was next. He was an older guy who reminded me of the true Willy Nelson, one long, gray, braid going down his back, wrinkles around his eyes, and a deep raspy voice. I liked him, too and I was sure this dude had some good smoke.
Knowing that I was surrounded by people who knew how to have a good time, made my day. Knowing Tristan was okay with it, made me love her even more. I never did get into the harder stuff and the whole thing about weed leading to more dangerous drugs was a lie. I was young, but not stupid and I never planned to put any man made chemical in my body. A little bit of God grown weed... Hell yeah.
“We’re going to go say hi to Toni and take a nap. Neither of us slept last night. We’ll see you later. Can you do me a favor? If anymore comes in, could you ask if they plan on partying the whole weekend? Put them on the other side so they don’t keep the kids awake.”
“Already ahead of you my friend. I’ll see you later. Nice to meet you,” he said, his head nodding at me.
“You, too. I’m sure I’ll be seeing you.”
Next came a girl no older than me. Toni looked like she could have been about twelve, petite, weighing in at maybe a hundred pounds, and traveling alone. I mostly stood off to the side, checking the place out while they drank nasty-ass peppermint tea and talked about Baby-T. This girl was really out here alone. She’d been dispersed camping in national forests for the last two months, making her way to the Shenandoah Mountains to hang with some friends. It sort of baffled me. I never knew these people existed and I thought van dwelling went out in the sixties.
It wasn’t until I yawned that Tristan remembered me, but I didn’t do it to be rude or anything. I could sit and listen to Tristan talk for hours, and I could already tell, I liked her friend.
“Okay, girl. We’re going to take a nap. Jodi and Joni want to build a labyrinth, you’re helping,” Tristan ordered with a straight finger and then a loving hug, “I’m so happy you’re here.”
“There’s going to be a shit ton of kids here by tomorrow. All we have to do is give orders on where to put the rocks. We’ve got this, my friend. Maybe we can find someone to draw us a blueprint. The last one ended up a little lopsided.”
“That’s
because you were drunk, my feet were swollen, and it was cold as hell…And don’t you worry. I know an amazing artist. This is my Ty.” Tristan teased, her hand flattening on my chest while mine pulled her closer.
“Perfect. Nice meeting you, Ty.”
“You too, see ya later.”
We walked off hand in hand to fetch Baby-T. “This labyrinth thing has turned into a normal part of these things. Those two little girls don’t forget anything, but what better way to start them out? You know?”
“Well, I don’t get it.”
“What?”
“The whole labyrinth thing. What’s it for?”
Tristan stopped and looked at me like she suddenly didn’t remember who I was. “You’re joking. You don’t know what a labyrinth is?”
“I mean, yeah. I know it’s a maze.”
She rolled her eyes and pulled me along. “It’s not a maze. It’s a labyrinth. Only asleep people think like that. A maze is a difficult puzzle with many ways in, struggles, and dead ends. A labyrinth has only one way in and one way out. It’s easy. Simple down, boy.”
“Boy? I’ll give you boy. But what’s it mean? What do you do with it?”
Tristan took in the deep breath and tried not to roll her eyes.
That was the lesson I got while she laid in my arms, Baby-T nursing between us, and all our bodies entwined. No beginning, no end.
“Release, receive, return. That’s the best way to describe a labyrinth. Sometimes I like to journal before I go in. Anyway, as you go in you should be aware of what it is you need to release.”
“Release?” I questioned, my finger gliding up and down her arm.
“Yes, like an issue you’re having or something you’re worried about. I spent four hours walking through one we made with the kids in Ohio the day I had Tobias.”
“You did?”
“Huh-uh, I was scared shitless, T.”
“I’m sure you were. You’re sort of crazy for that, for not having him in a hospital like normal people.”
“You’re not allowed to use the word normal around me. Do you want to hear about the labyrinth or not?”
“Okay, you go in, thinking about something you need help with, right?”
“It doesn’t have to be you. Sometimes I’m so happy and grateful, I walk for other people. Like Willy. He’s dying. I’ve put my intentions on his peaceful transition many times while walking.”
“He’s dying? He doesn’t look like he’s dying.”
Tristan’s eyes met mine and she kissed me. “You know what dying looks like?”
“Well, no. I mean, sort of. What’s wrong with him?”
“Stage four colon cancer. They gave him three months if he didn’t get the treatment they thought he needed, a year if he did. That was about six months ago. I don’t know how long he has, but he looks good, and I’m going to keep on walking for his peace.”
“Let’s not talk about that. I’m too happy to talk about death.”
Tristan once again smiled up at me and I kissed her nose. “Death is the easiest thing you’ll ever do, Ty. Nobody should ever be afraid of dying.”
“Unless you get cancer and suffer in pain for months.”
“It’s still part of the lesson, and Willy says that’s all a scare tactic. Like you’re terrified of the pain, but you handle it. He says you’re more afraid of being afraid than the actual pain.”
“Yeah, I don’t get that,” I yawned, one arm going over my closed eyes.
“Shhh, go to sleep.”
I think I already was. That was the last thing I remembered until I woke alone, feeling rested. Once I realized Tobias wasn’t in his bed and Tristan wasn’t in the van, I sat up, my eyes landing on the back of her head. Crawling out of the van, I went to the front, took a piss, and went to sit with her.
“Did you sleep?”
“A little. Tobias didn’t really sleep. Until now, of course,” she teased, her eyes moving to Baby-T, sound asleep to her chest.
“Go rest. I’ll take care of him.”
“No, I’m fine. We’ll go to bed early.”
Without her permission, I unbuckled the strap. “Go. It’s nice and dark in there and there’s a cool breeze blowing right through the screens. Me and my main man here are going to meditate. You go sleep a while.”
“Tobias, I’m fine.”
“Go to bed, T. That’s an order.”
“Ty.”
“Go.” I ordered with a straight finger.
“You make me so mad sometimes.”
“You make me so mad sometimes, too. Now go.”
Tristan grumbled like an old bear, but she left, her bare feet stomping away like a spoiled little three –year-old.
I really did try to meditate, but it didn’t work for me. For real. You had to be special or something to do that. It really didn’t work on me. My mind stayed thoughtless for all of two seconds. First I thought about sleeping in the van with Tristan. Then I thought about the two tomatoes on the counter in the van. Then I thought about the noises Baby-T was making. Then my stomach growled. Then a bird cawed over my head. Then I wondered if Tristan had fallen asleep. Then Baby-T shit. Right in my hand.
“Oh, man. You couldn’t have waited on that?”
For a second I contemplated on waiting until Tristan woke up, but then I decided he’d probably hate me if I did that. Against my will, I quietly retrieved his backpack from the counter. Of course it couldn’t just be a normal solid kind of poop. This kid never pooped like that. It was always bad. Real bad. All over his clothes, up his back, and down his little legs, but…King Tobias did it. Even right this time. Not a trace of green poop was left anywhere. Except his sleeper. That wasn’t my fault. It was his. He curled his legs to his body and rolled to his side for that mess. That was all on him and if Tristan yelled at me for it, I was pointing right to him, too.
“There you go. All better,” I said while scooping him up. Looking in on Tristan sound asleep on her side, curled in a ball the same way Baby-T slept. I decided to go for a walk around the field. We talked to Tristan’s friend Toni mostly though, and I learned that she’d lost her husband in a senseless war. Four months. That’s it. That’s how long they were married before he stepped on a landmine while patrolling poppy fields in Afghanistan. I was learning pretty quickly that all of Tristan’s friends were liberals. Toni was absolutely one of them. She hated the government and everything they stood for. This was a whole new life for me, foreign as a distant country. These people were something else. Tristan wasn’t the only one.
Toni, too was just as passionate about the things that never existed before Tristan. She refused to pay taxes to a corrupt government, refused to shop at the biggest department store chain in America, and she was pissed that people didn’t have a choice in the matter. Just like Tristan, Toni hated the broken system and refused to be a part of it. I actually liked listening to her explain things to me more than Tristan and I told her so.
“You have a way with words. I’m sort of new to all this. Tristan gets so mad at me when she’s trying to get me to see things her way,” I admitted with a laugh, reaching over to wipe a little spit-up from the corner of Baby-T’s mouth with my thumb.
“I don’t have a way with words. Tristan’s the one who people listen to.”
“Except him. He drives me crazy,” Tristan confessed from behind me, her fingers lacing with the hair on the back of my neck.
Jesus, her touch radiated emotions. I reached around and took her hand, smiling back at her. “You didn’t sleep long.”
“That’s because I’m so full it hurts. I couldn’t take it anymore.”
I frowned at her, but not because she sat right in my lap, that seemed as natural as breathing and I loved it. The scowl was more wondering, something I seemed to do a lot with her. We hadn’t even eaten yet. “Full? Full of what?”
Tristan smiled back at me with the look that said she was amused, making fun of me for unknown reasons. “Baby-T hasn’t eaten in almost fo
ur hours.”
Dumb me still didn’t get it. “So?”
“My boobs are full, T.”
“Oh.”
Both Toni and Tristan laughed at me or maybe it was the crimson in my cheeks. Sometimes I wished she’d be a little more subtle.
Tristan fed Baby-T while sitting on my lap and I listened to them talk about yet another subject I had never heard of before. A simple airplane flying overhead started it all.
“Stupid fuckers,” Toni exclaimed, her eyes going to the jet above.
Of course Tristan knew what the problem was, her head shaking back and forth in disbelief. “I can’t believe people aren’t seeing this and paying a little more attention.”
“They still think it’s nothing more than a contrail.”
I knew a thing or two about this subject and I boasted a little, happy to disclose my factual information, maybe even look smart for once. There was even hope that I finally knew something Tristan didn’t. “It is a contrail. Science is actually one class I was good at. When a plane travels at about thirty thousand feet or more, the air is compressed into a water vapor or ice crystals. That’s what is making the trail. It’s just water vapors.”
Of course I wasn’t the smart one. I should have known better. They both looked at each other, Toni hiding a smile, trading some sort of hidden message with Tristan. “You poor girl,” she said.
“Right.”
“Hey, I’m right here.”
They laughed at me, Tristan turning her body and pulling her knees to her chest on my lap. She kissed my forehead and smiled warmly. “Remember when I said they threw the word science in there to make you think it’s factual? Yeah, it’s not. If that was a simple vapor trail from the temperature different it would disappear in a few minutes. That, my friend is a chemtrail.”
“You think they’re putting chemicals in the air?”
Simultaneously, Tristan and Toni agreed, and Toni went on to explain. “Oh I know it is. Chemtrails are very different from a contrail. Watch how instead of it disappearing like a contrail, it spreads. A simple contrail doesn’t stay in the sky for hours and hours. You watch. That thing will either turn the sky a hazy gray, or traverse the whole visible sky and be there for eight or nine hours. Geoengineering my ass.”