Anarchism of an Antichrist

  Chapter 6

  Jason got his food from the cafeteria line and he looked at the tables. Ethan and Tom weren't seated at a table, so he sat at an empty one and began eating. It was his third night at the hospital and he missed his home. Once he got out of the hospital he would be more careful. From now on he wouldn't sneak out of the house and he would keep his cigarettes better hidden.

  He noticed Jessica staring at him from a table nearby and he met her eyes, feeling warmth and comfort in her stare. She quickly averted her gaze. A hot flush of blood rushed into Jason's cheeks. It was the first time a girl had ever caused such a sensation in him. He'd already developed a fondness for her soft voice and her personality. Ordinarily, she would be just another plain face, but her voice and personality radiated a type of sensitivity and cuteness that was endearing to him. He didn't like hearing she'd been molested. She seemed so frail.

  Christie asked, “Do you want to sit with us?” She was seated next to Jessica, who had returned to looking at him.

  Jason said, “Sure.” Then he took a seat at the other side of the table. It was just the three of them for now.

  “How are you liking the hospital?” asked Jessica.

  Her voice sounded more soft and cute than ever before. Warmth suffused his entire body with the enjoyment of her interest and the attraction radiating from her adorable eyes. “It's hard to get used to.”

  “Yeah. Me too.”

  “How long have you been here?”

  “A few weeks now.”

  “I hope I don't have to stay here that long.”

  “I'm hoping to get out soon.”

  “Me too. What did they put you on?”

  “Drozac.”

  “That's what they put me on. It doesn't really even do anything.”

  “I know. I only take it because they make me.”

  Christie interjected, “It's supposed to take a couple weeks before you can feel the effects from the Drozac.”

  Jason sighed. “I don't want to be stuck here a couple more weeks to see if the Drozac starts working.”

  Jessica asked, “Is your depression getting any better?”

  “It's not really a depression, it's a sleeping disorder.”

  “What's the difference?”

  “I'm not depressed about my situation. I just sleep a lot.”

  “Is that what got you put in here?”

  “Pretty much. Why did you get put in here?”

  A slight shadow crept over Jessica's features and she looked down at the table as she said, “It's a long story.”

  Obviously, she was sensitive about the topic. He would avoid it.

  The three of them remained silent for a while as they ate. Then Jessica rose and smiled at him. “It was nice talking to you, Jason.”

  “Yeah. Thanks for inviting me over.”

  Christie also rose and said, “You're welcome to sit with us any time.”

  Jason's spirits were soaring as Jessica and Christie put their trays away and passed by the table on their way out of the cafeteria. Jessica, smiling coyly, glanced his way and Christie whispered something indistinguishable to her.

  Then Ethan slipped into the chair next to him and said, “Looks like you've been having fun.”

  “What do you mean by that?”

  “Your face, man. You're glowing.”

  Jason rose from the table.

  Concern entered Ethan's features and he said “I didn't mean it that way.”

  “Don't worry. I just need to get back to north.”

  “No bad. Right man.”

  “Of course.”

  Later that evening, Jason was reading a novel on his bed and Tom was practicing guitar nearby, when the door to the bathroom opened. Ethan and John entered from the adjoining room.

  “What are you guys up to?” asked Ethan.

  “Not much,” replied Tom.

  Jason looked up from his book. “What do you want?”

  “I want to talk,” said Ethan. “It gets lonely in that room.”

  “Just keep it down so the counselors don't hear us,” advised Tom.

  Ethan nodded. “Of course. Hey, Jason. What do you think of Jessica?”

  “She's cute.”

  “Do you like her?”

  “Yeah, I do. I enjoy being around her.”

  “She's got the hots for you.”

  Jason's heart beat quickened pace. “Really?”

  “You should ask her if she wants to be your girlfriend.”

  “Already?”

  “You don't know how long you're both gonna be in this place.”

  “He's right,” agreed Tom. “Don't let an opportunity like that pass you by.”

  “If I had an opportunity like that with Tracy, I'd be right on it.”

  “You were right on it anyways,” teased John.

  “Of course I was. She's gorgeous. Besides, I haven't had sex in months.”

  “You've had sex?” asked Jason.

  Ethan proudly answered, “Yeah. That was part of me getting put in this place. I was seeing a twenty-year old girl and my parents found out.”

  “What was it like?”

  “It was the bomb. She was digging her fingernails into my back and everything.”

  “Is that the only girl you've been with?”

  “No. I was dating her sister.”

  “How old was she?”

  “Sixteen.”

  Tom asked, “How did she feel about you banging her older sister?”

  “She was pissed off. She's the one who got me and her sister in trouble.”

  “That's antisocial to do that with her own sister.”

  “Which one do you think was being antisocial?” asked Jason.

  “The one who told,” replied Tom.

  The boys laughed.

  “Damn straight she was being antisocial. There's more than enough of me to go around. It's not like I was asking them for a threesome or something.”

  The boys laughed again.

  There was a knock on the door. Ethan and John raced back into the bathroom just before the door opened. A counselor opened the door and commanded, “Keep the noise down.”

  “Sure thing,” replied Tom as Jason returned to his book.

  For the next week, Jason sat with Jessica during most of the meals, but he didn't take the other boys' advice about asking her to be his girlfriend. Instead he made small talk with her and behaved nonchalantly about it. A few times she made the effort to sit at the same table as him and when they sat at separate tables he often saw her staring at him.

  One day, after he had finished lunch, as he was going to put his tray on the stack, Anthony, walking in the opposite direction, bumped shoulders with him. The physical force of the collision suggested it may have been more than an accident, but Jason shrugged it off and said, “Excuse me.”

  “Excuse you,” replied Anthony, walking out of the cafeteria with Mark.

  That evening, Jason and the other patients were gathered in the rec room. Jessica was sitting on a couch on the other side of the room and Jason made sure not to look at her too much.

  “Where's Tracy?” asked Mark.

  “She was transferred to east,” reported a female counselor.

  Distress overtook Jessica's features when the counselor reported this news.

  Mark vehemently protested, “What the fuck was she put there for?”

  “Calm your language Mark.”

  “She didn't do anything wrong.”

  “The staff has made their decision.”

  “You and your fucking contract! That's totally sadistic to do that to her!”

  “Mark! You were told to calm down.”

  Two male counselors entered the rec room. “Is something wrong?” asked one.

  “Mark needs some quiet time in his room.”

  The two male counselors approached Mark. “Come along with us, Mark.”

  Mark rose from the chair “It's unfair,” he complained. Then he followed them out of the r
ec room.

  There was a gentle tugging at Jason's heart, when he recognized that Jessica was quietly weeping.

  In the hallway, one of Mark's escorts said, “There's nothing to get upset about.”

  The other escort quipped, “Plenty of fish in the sea.”

  “Fuck you!” shouted Mark. “Fuck you demeaning my love for her!”

  There was a commotion and many of the patients rushed to the door to watch, but Jason saw Jessica remaining seated on the couch. She was alone now. He rose from his seat and approached her.

  “That's it,” asserted one of Mark's escorts in the hall. “You're going to the quiet room for that.”

  When the counselor mentioned the quiet room, Jessica began sobbing.

  Jason repressed tears threatening to spring from his own eyes as he sat down next to her. He placed his hand on her back and said, “It'll be all right.”

  Suddenly, Jessica wrapped her arms around him and hugged him, immersing him in her blissful embrace. “They don't have to take him to the quiet room. He just wants to be with her.”

  “He'll be all right. So will Tracy. It's just another ward.”

  Jason noticed Jessica's head swiveling toward the door. Then she backed away from him slightly with her hands still gripping his back and she kissed him. He returned the kiss and got a head rush more powerful than he'd ever gotten from any strain of marijuana he'd ever smoked. It was like he'd been transferred to heaven on earth for those few brief moments.

  “Hey you two!” shouted the female counselor from the doorway.

  As quickly as he'd entered that state of bliss with her, he was snapped out of it, still pulsing with the after affects. He knew she wanted him as her boyfriend. The counselors couldn't take that from him.

  “You both know that's not allowed.”

  “Sorry,” said Jessica.

  “Yeah, sorry,” Jason lied.

  Ethan looked through the doorway and gave Jason a wry smile.

  Jessica giggled.

  “It's about time for bed,” said the counselor. “You should both get to your rooms.”

  Jason looked steadfastly into Jessica's eyes and he said, “Goodnight, Jessica.”

  Her eyes melted an outer shell he didn't even realize had been there, as she replied, “Goodnight, Jason.”

  Ethan followed Jason into the hall and asked, “What were you two doing?”

  “Wouldn't you like to know,” replied Jason.

  Jessica giggled again at his reply and he stared at her walking down the hall to her own room. When she had reached the door, she looked back at him, beaming with happiness, and she waved goodbye to him.

  Jason waved back and watched her enter the bedroom. Then he continued to his own room, still enjoying the after effects of that head rush.

  “You kissed her, didn't you,” assumed Ethan.

  “Jason kissed Jessica?” asked John.

  Jason entered his bedroom, relieved to be away from the gossipers. There he lay down on his bed and thought about how he would ask Jessica to be his girlfriend.

  Just as Jason was about to slip off to sleep, the bathroom door opened and Ethan and John entered. “You going to sleep already?” asked Ethan.

  “I was planning on it,” replied Jason.

  “So you and Jessica are an item now.”

  “That might be the case.”

  “What do you mean that might be the case?”

  “Well, she kissed me, but...”

  “You mean she kissed you and you still haven't asked her out yet?”

  Tom looked over from the bed next to his. “What are you? An idiot?”

  “I was planning on asking her out soon.”

  “She's a really nice girl,” observed Ethan. “Really sensitive.”

  John said, “She doesn't even like Tracy and she was crying over her going to east.”

  “That's right,” agreed Ethan.

  “What do you mean she doesn't like Tracy?” asked Jason.

  Ethan explained, “They used to be roommates, but the counselors split them up not long after you got in here.”

  “Why?”

  “Tracy was making her cry.”

  “Why would she do that to Jessica?”

  “Beats me. Maybe you should ask Jessica that question.”

  “I need to get some sleep now.”

  “Sure,” replied Ethan. Then he and John left back through the bathroom.

  The next day, Jason was sitting alone in the rec room and watching a news program, when Anthony entered. Anthony walked up to the television and switched the channel to a football game.

  “Hey, I was watching that,” Jason protested.

  “Well, now you're watching this,” Anthony responded, imperiously seating himself on the couch.

  Jason rose from his seat and walked toward the door.

  Anthony grabbed him as he was passing by and said, “What's the matter? Are you a sissy boy?” Anthony put Jason into a headlock and propped him up against the couch.

  The painful weight over his head and back caused Jason to cry out in pain. “Let me go!” demanded Jason.

  “You don't like football you little sissy boy?”

  Ethan called out from the doorway. “Anthony's attacking Jason!”

  Instead of scaring Anthony, the call for help only spurred him to tighten the headlock even more, squeezing the air from Jason's lungs.

  There were footsteps nearby. “Anthony!” shouted a male counselor. “Anthony let go of him right now!”

  The counselors pried Anthony's hands from Jason and Jason gasped for breath, holding his hands against the couch to retain balance. They led Anthony away without any resistance on his part.

  “Are you all right?” asked Ethan.

  “Yeah, I just need to catch my breath.” He took his hands from the couch and rose to full stature. The need to rest overtook him and he decided to retire to his bedroom, until he saw Jessica approaching.

  “Are you hurt?” asked Jessica.

  He adored the look of concern in her eyes. “I'm just a little sore.”

  “I hate Anthony. He's such a bully.”

  Ethan surmised, “He probably just wanted to go to east to be with Mark and Tracy.”

  Feeling extreme resentment, Jason said, “I hope he gets what he wants.”

  Then Jessica placed her hand on Jason's shoulder and a vibrant energy expelled the resentment, replacing it with a pleasurable ardor. “So do I,” she said.

  Jason stared into Jessica's eyes and said, “I'd like to talk to you alone for a moment, if you don't mind.”

  “Sure,” replied Jessica.

  “I get the picture,” said Ethan. Then he left back out into the hall.

  Jason led her into a corner of the rec room, in case anybody else entered. “I really like spending time with you,” said Jason. “Do you like spending time with me?”

  Her lips curled into a radiant smile. “Yes, I do.”

  “Do you want to keep in contact after we get out of this place?”

  “Yes. That would be fun. I can give you my email address and my cell phone number.”

  Anxiety sank into Jason as he prepared to ask her the question he'd been building up to. He tried to speak evenly as he said, “Well, I was wondering if maybe you might want to be my girlfriend.” He felt so clumsy and awkward stumbling over his words and a part of him was dreading her response. For all he knew it could be mere flattery.

  “Yes,” she answered, filling him full of splendorous elation. “I would like to have you as my boyfriend.”

  Her response was a source of wondrous excitement. He loved knowing she felt the same way he did. “We can email each other and I'll visit you when I can,” said Jason.

  She giggled. Then she reached out and hugged him.