Addicted

  “I’m not even gonna make this good for you,” the man on top of her muttered as he tried to work her jeans down. “You lost that chance, honey. Now I’m gonna make it hurt. I’m gonna tear you open with my cock, you hear me? I’m gonna fuck you until you’re bleeding and bruised and—”

  His head exploded.

  Jamie screeched in horror as his head literally exploded. One second he had a face. Wild red eyes, a narrow forehead, a mouth that was moving. The next, he was nothing but a cloud of blood and brains that spattered all over her.

  Suddenly she was free, but still too stunned to move. It was the sound of gunshots blasting in the air that sent her stumbling to her feet. She heard footsteps, then saw two more bodies hit the ground. Panicked yells came from the bandits, more footsteps, and a blur in her peripheral vision as a large body sprinted away.

  She turned her head to see Lennox and Beckett racing toward her, guns drawn, eyes glittering ferociously. Relief swamped her body like a flash flood.

  “Beck!” Lennox shouted.

  The next thing she knew, Beckett was running after the two bandits who’d taken off in a breakneck run.

  Jamie wiped her face with one shaky hand, but that just succeeded in smearing Red Beard’s blood into her mouth and eyes. Her hair was soaked with it, sticking to her forehead and neck.

  She jerked when she felt a strong hand on her chin. “Jamie. Jamie.”

  Lennox’s voice penetrated the fog. She blinked and registered his familiar gray eyes.

  “Are you okay?” he demanded. “Are you hurt?”

  “I’m fine,” she whispered.

  “They didn’t hurt you?” His hands were running up and down her body now, checking her for injuries. He growled when he found that her jeans were undone.

  She swallowed. “Tried to.”

  Another growl rumbled in his throat, and then he was gone, marching toward the last surviving bandit. The man had been shot in the leg, and he was groaning wildly as he tried to crawl away.

  Without a shred of hesitation, Lennox pointed his gun and fired. Jamie flinched as she watched another man’s head explode. Then she swept her distraught gaze over the grassy area. She saw the body of the man she’d killed, and three more bodies courtesy of Beckett and Lennox.

  Hopefully Beckett would take care of the remaining two, but when she heard the roar of motorcycle engines and the screech of tires in the distance, her hopes plummeted.

  Beckett returned less than a minute later, frustration darkening his eyes. “Fuckers took off,” he spat out. “They had their Harleys stashed at the side of the house.” He glanced at Lennox. “Should we go after them?”

  Lennox cursed, then thought it over. “No. The cowards will be long gone before we even make it to the Jeep. They won’t show their faces back here.”

  Jamie knew he was right. Bandits were opportunists, only stealing and pillaging when it was advantageous to them, when they were confident they could get away with it. Now that they knew there were outlaws in the area who were armed and well trained, they’d scurry away like the spineless rats they were.

  “Were those the same ones who attacked Foxworth?” Lennox asked the other man.

  Beckett shook his head. “Nah. Never seen these ones before.”

  Lennox lowered his weapon and sneered at the bloody, motionless bodies on the grass. “Beck,” he said.

  The man waited for him to continue.

  “Go wait in the car.”

  Beckett must have heard the same ominous note in Lennox’s voice that Jamie did, because he disappeared without another word.

  Jamie swallowed the lump of fear that rose in her throat. Lennox’s eyes were blazing with red-hot fury. And it was directed at her.

  “Len,” she started.

  He silenced her with a harsh look. “Do you see what he did there?”

  Confusion washed over her. “Who?”

  “Beckett.” His features were drawn so tight his entire face was transformed. A hard, vicious mask that made her palms go damp. “I told him to wait in the car.” He slanted his head. “And you know what he’s going to do?”

  Jamie gulped again.

  “He’s going to wait in the fucking car!”

  Before she could respond, he gripped her chin again and jerked her head upward so she was looking him in the eye.

  “What the hell were you thinking going off by yourself?”

  She was too weak to push him off her. She thought of the pretty white dress and the sparkling pearls and diamonds in her bag, and shame seeped into her bones. Lennox was right. She’d taken her quiet, peaceful surroundings for granted. She’d broken the first rule of outlaw life—allowing herself to believe there wasn’t any danger.

  “I—I was raiding the house,” she stammered.

  “You were raiding the house.” He echoed her in a monotone, but his gray eyes were as dark as thunderclouds, flashing with emotion. “You were raiding the house.”

  “Lennox.” Annoyance climbed up her throat. She got it. She’d screwed up. But the two of them had gone on raids and supply runs hundreds of times before. They’d split up before, run into bandits countless of times, but he’d never reacted with this degree of anger.

  Lennox went silent. His jaw ticked.

  Then he lost it.

  “You could have been killed! They were going to rape you, damn it!” His fingers tightened in her hair. “The next time I give you an order, you fucking obey me, you understand?”

  “Obey you?” Her irritation morphed into a lightning bolt of anger that matched the one blazing in his eyes. “You are not in charge of my life, Lennox! I don’t follow your orders!”

  “Like hell you don’t. The only reason you’re alive is because I’ve always been there to take care of you.”

  Her jaw dropped. “That’s bullshit. We’re a team. We’ve always made decisions together. We give orders together. Or was I wrong about that? Has it been you this whole time?” She was spitting mad now. “You’ve been in charge and I’ve just been cowering behind you like a frightened two-year-old?”

  “I told you to wait in the car!”

  “And I chose to raid the house! That was my risk to take.”

  “Was it worth it?” he snapped back. “Because those bastards would have raped you if Beck and I hadn’t shown up.”

  His hands dropped to her shoulders, shaking her so violently that she slammed her palms on his broad chest and shoved him away. “I screwed up!” she burst out. “Okay? I didn’t clear the area before I went inside the house, and that’s on me. I fucking get that.”

  “It wouldn’t have happened if you’d listened to me!”

  “Well, I didn’t.” When he advanced on her, she gave him another hard shove. “What are you going to do about it, Len? Spank me? You’re not my father, and you don’t get to tell me what to do.”

  “Maybe I should,” he hissed out. “Because clearly you’ve forgotten how to use your goddamn brain. Maybe you need someone telling you what to do if these are the kinds of stupid decisions you’re going to make.”

  They were breathing hard, and with the dropping temperature she could see each puff of air that escaped their mouths. Lennox looked ready to murder her. She felt the same way, so close to throttling him that her hands were tingling. He’d never treated her this way before. Like a child. No, like an imbecile. He actually had the nerve to call her stupid? To stick out his big manly chest and act as if she couldn’t walk down the street without holding his hand?

  God, Reese had been right. Things were changing. Lennox never would have dreamed of talking to her like this before.

  And she didn’t fucking like it.

  “You need to be careful about what you say next,” Jamie said, her voice deceptively soft. “Because I’m this close to strangling you right now, Lennox.”

  “Y
ou want to strangle me?” Disbelief passed through his eyes. “Do you realize what it felt like to hear those gunshots? To run out here and find you on the ground with some sick fuck between your legs? Do you realize how close you came to dying?”

  “Yes.” She clenched her teeth. “And I’m grateful that you and Beckett came along when you did—”

  “You’re grateful?”

  “—but that doesn’t give you the right to shout at me and call me stupid.”

  “I didn’t call you stupid. I called your actions stupid.”

  “Same thing.”

  Silence fell over them as they stared at each other. Jamie took a breath, trying to calm her erratic heartbeat, to cool the hot rush of fury still boiling in her blood.

  “We should go,” she muttered. “Beckett’s waiting.”

  She stalked past him before he could make a snide remark about how Beckett knew the meaning of waiting when she clearly didn’t. God, she couldn’t even look at him. She knew she’d screwed up, but she hadn’t deserved his hurtful attack. She hadn’t fucking deserved it.

  They were supposed to be equals. She’d thought they were, but he’d made her feel like a piece of dirt under his shoes. And right now she needed to get as far away from him as possible before she did or said something she would regret.

  * * *

  The drive back to Foxworth was riddled with tension. Beckett didn’t say a word, wisely understanding that something had gone down between them, and Jamie was grateful for his silence. She and Lennox hadn’t spoken either, but she knew he was still pissed off at her, because his mouth stayed locked in a tense line until the moment he drove through the town gates and parked the Jeep in the courtyard.

  The three of them hopped out, their boots silently hitting the dirt. Ignoring the stack of books in the backseat, Lennox mumbled something about needing to tell Reese about the appearance of more bandits in the area, and stalked off. Beckett trailed after him.

  Jamie went to the law office instead of tagging along. She was still pissed off too. At Lennox. At herself. At fucking everything. She needed a shower and a drink, in that order. The first one was easy to cross off the list, but after she’d washed all the blood and dirt off her body and headed outside again, she hesitated on the sidewalk. The thought of chatting with anyone who might be at the restaurant was about as appealing as having Lennox rage at her again.

  She went to the kitchen instead, which was really just another restaurant, but this one was used only to store food in the huge walk-in freezers and refrigerators. She grabbed a beer from one of the fridges, ignoring the rows of liquor bottles on the shelves across the room. Anything stronger than beer would go right to her head and bring on an adrenaline crash she didn’t feel like enduring.

  She’d thought she was alone in the dark restaurant, so when a deep voice said, “Hey,” she jumped nearly two feet in the air. Kade was seated at a table in the shadowy corner of the room. He held a beer bottle in both hands, watching her with wary eyes.

  “Hey,” she answered in a wobbly voice. “I didn’t see you there.”

  “Everything all right?”

  “Nope.”

  That made him chuckle. He rapped his knuckles on the tabletop. “Want to sit down?”

  Not really. She felt like pacing the room until she managed to dispel the negative energy coursing through her. She still wanted to rip Lennox’s throat out for the way he’d talked to her.

  But since she couldn’t exactly murder her best friend, she forced herself to sit across from Kade and gripped the beer bottle tight enough to turn her knuckles white.

  “What happened?” Kade asked.

  She took a small sip. “We ran into bandits on the road.”

  Concern immediately filled his dark eyes. “They give you any trouble?”

  “Yeah. It got pretty bad for a moment there. But Lennox and Beck came to my rescue.” She couldn’t stop a twinge of sarcasm at the end.

  “You say that like it’s a bad thing,” he said dryly.

  She swallowed some more beer, her heart squeezing as she remembered Lennox’s enraged face. “He yelled at me,” she confessed.

  Kade looked as though he was trying not to laugh. “Lennox?”

  Jamie nodded unhappily. “It was bad. He totally lost it, Kade. Like, lost it. I’ve never seen him like that before.”

  “He was worried about you. And probably scared shitless about what could have happened if he hadn’t shown up.”

  “He’s allowed to be scared. But he’s not allowed to treat me like I’m an idiot. We’ve been traveling together for years. He knows I can take care of myself.”

  “Sounds like you couldn’t tonight,” Kade hedged in. “You said so yourself—you needed rescuing.”

  “Maybe, but the way he reacted . . .” The anger returned, simmering in her belly. “We’ve gotten each other out of jams before. Trust me, this isn’t the first time I’ve screwed up, and God knows he’s screwed up before too. But we’ve always backed each other up, because that’s what we do. We’re there for each other.” A helpless feeling clogged her throat. “Tonight he acted like I’m the weak link in our relationship. Like it’s up to him and him alone to give orders and make decisions. Like he’s the one who’s always protected me and I’ve never done the same for him. Which is complete bullshit.”

  Even with the lights off, she could see the thoughtful gleam in Kade’s dark eyes. “I heard you guys are sleeping together now.”

  She bristled. “So?”

  “But you weren’t before?”

  “No.” Why did she get the feeling she was about to hear the same speech that Reese had given her earlier?

  “It’s different when a man is having sex with someone,” Kade began.

  Yep, there it was. Another bullshit speech about how everything would change.

  He saw her skeptical expression and added, “Seriously, honey. It’s a whole other level of protective instincts. Possessiveness. It’s like this basic, primal urge suddenly comes out and makes a man extra determined to protect the woman in his bed.”

  “Why?” She asked more out of annoyance than curiosity, because sex had nothing to do with whether or not a woman could take care of herself.

  Kade shrugged. “Maybe it’s because he’s seen her at her most vulnerable? Sex is intimate. You’re naked, exposed. There’s a certain degree of trust involved.” He raised his bottle to his lips. “I don’t know. It’s hard to explain. Bottom line—sex turns guys into cavemen.”

  “Yeah, well, he still had no right to call me stupid,” Jamie muttered.

  Kade whistled. “Shit. Lennox called you stupid? He must’ve really been worried about you.”

  That didn’t appease her. Lennox had every reason to be worried, but there was no excuse for the way he’d handled himself.

  “If it makes you feel any better, I get the same bullshit from Xan.”

  Kade’s confession sparked her curiosity, especially when she recognized the implication. “Wait . . . are you saying the two of you are sleeping together?” She’d seen Kade and Xander share women before, but she’d never witnessed them going at it solo.

  “No,” he answered, chuckling softly. “We’re not. But I was in a similar situation as you were tonight when Connor and the guys found me two years ago. I was getting the shit kicked out of me by bandits—they fucked me up pretty good—and I don’t think Xander has been able to erase that first impression of me, all bloody and beaten.”

  “How many men were there? Attacking you, I mean?”

  “Three.” He gave another chuckle, rueful this time. “I was literally out of the city for two days when it happened. I had no idea what life was like out here. I knew some Enforcers who’d had contact with outlaws, and they always described you guys as fierce but incredibly loyal to each other. I hadn’t realized bandits existed, men who didn?
??t give a shit about anyone but themselves. So I wasn’t prepared, and I suffered for it.” He shrugged. “But that put a brand of weakness on me. They still think I’m weak.”

  “They don’t think you’re weak,” she objected.

  “Of course they do. Connor sent me here for more training, for fuck’s sake,” Kade said with a laugh. “It’s different with Xan, though. He doesn’t just try to teach me how to defend myself. He somehow got it in his head that he needs to watch over me.”

  “He cares about you.”

  “Lennox cares about you,” Kade countered.

  They fell silent as they sipped their beers again. She knew Kade was right—Lennox did care about her. But he’d made her feel . . . inferior tonight. And weak. He’d made it sound as if he’d been carrying her all these years, when she’d truly believed they were carrying each other.

  She didn’t like that. No, she hated it. Hated thinking that Lennox viewed her as helpless or lacking. That they weren’t a team, but a leader and his obedient follower.

  She swallowed another gulp of beer. The bitter liquid slid down to her stomach, joining the unbearable knot of bitterness already lodged there.

  15

  Lennox’s meeting with Reese was brief. The Foxworth leader wasn’t pleased that a second group of bandits had drifted this close to her town, but other than send a few men to make sure the assholes were really gone, there wasn’t much more she could do. And she agreed with Lennox that she didn’t expect them to return.

  After he left Reese’s building, he went on an immediate hunt for Jamie. She wasn’t in their rooms, the restaurant, or the loft, which left one other place he needed to check—the rec hall.

  Sure enough, he spotted her the moment he walked inside. She was sitting alone in the corner, a bottle of beer resting on her knee. Lennox took one look at her cloudy, stay-the-hell-away-from-me expression and knew she was still pissed.

  He might have overreacted earlier. Just a tad.

  More than a tad, asshole.

  Regret floated through him as he thought about his behavior. The second he and Beckett were alone earlier, the man had told him in no uncertain terms that he needed to apologize to Jamie. Apparently Beck had heard Lennox shouting all the way from the Jeep, and he’d given Lennox a sympathetic pat on the shoulder when they were leaving Reese’s apartment. Even Beck knew that it would take a shit ton of groveling to earn Jamie’s forgiveness.