Hope Flames
Page 41
Author: Jaci Burton
That revelation had made her toss and turn and feel even more miserable. Even worse, she missed him in her bed, but she’d just have to get used to that because independent women like her didn’t need a man and didn’t need love. And even if she had realized she was in love with Luke, she once thought she was in love with Vaughn, too, so she wasn’t exactly the best judge of that whole love thing, was she?
“Are you all right, Dr. Emma?” Leanne asked as they dealt with a particularly ornery chow who didn’t want to have his shots or his temperature taken or his ears inspected.
Emma fought back the tears that had been threatening all day long. “I’m fine. Allergies or something. ”
“Oh, those are the worst. Do you need to take something?”
Yeah. A vacation. On some deserted tropical island. “No, I’m good. Let’s just take care of Barney here so the poor guy can go home. ”
Work was an endless day of dogs, cats, birds, a snake and, for a fun change of pace, a lemur with a diarrhea problem. After that, she went home, fed the dogs, then grabbed a glass of wine and sat on her sofa, determined to do nothing but watch mindless television all night.
Until her doorbell rang. Immediately tensing, she looked over to the table where her purse lay. Deciding to check and see who it was first, she looked out the peephole, then smiled and opened the door.
“Hey, Chelsea. I didn’t know we had plans. ”
“We don’t. I just popped by on the chance you’d be home. And you are. ”
“Well, come on in. I’m having a glass of wine. ”
“Which just so happens to be my favorite pastime. ”
Emma poured a glass for Chelsea, who had tossed her purse on the end table and was sitting cross-legged on the floor playing with Daisy and Annie.
“I love Annie. I wish I could have dogs in my apartment. I’d have adopted her in a heartbeat if I could. ”
Emma laughed as Annie slurped one side of Chelsea’s face. “She loves you. ”
“Yeah, I’m just a lovable sort. ” She climbed up on the sofa and took the glass of wine, then sipped. “Oh, nice. What’s the occasion?”
“No occasion. Just unwinding. ”
“Always a good excuse. And where’s the hotshot stud who’s been sharing your bed lately?”
She took a sip of wine. “I sent him back home. ”
“Uh-oh. This could be a two-bottle night. Spill. What happened? Did you two have a fight?”
“No. Vaughn showed up at the clinic last night. ”
Chelsea’s eyes widened. “Oh my God. Are you all right? Did he try to hurt you?”
“I’m fine. He tried to intimidate me, but he never did anything. And then Luke showed up, and Vaughn was arrested for violating the restraining order. ”
“Thank God. ” Chelsea frowned. “Okay, so somewhere in there you kicked Luke to the curb?”
“Yes. ” She finished her glass of wine, went into the kitchen, and brought out the bottle, refilling her glass. Chelsea was still working on hers.
“You’ll have to explain,” Chelsea said. “Because I’m not understanding how Luke coming to your rescue resulted in you breaking up with him. ”
“It’s . . . complicated. ” She avoided making eye contact with Chelsea as she took another sip of wine.
“I can do complicated. I’m a math teacher. ”
“I was handling Vaughn. He was just . . . talking. Trying his typical intimidation tactics. And I had my gun in my purse, which was in my desk in case he tried something. And then Luke showed up and did the whole macho thing by arresting him. ”
“That bastard. ”
Emma rolled her eyes. “I told you. It’s complicated. ”
Chelsea laughed. “Honey. You have to see it from my viewpoint. Hot stuff comes in and intercedes between you and the guy you told me terrified you enough that you had to get a restraining order. So instead of being grateful, you broke up with him?”
Clearly she wasn’t getting her point across. “I didn’t need to be rescued. I was doing okay handling Vaughn. ”
“So when Vaughn showed up at the clinic, you weren’t freaked out in the least. You said, ‘Oh, how great to see you. Let’s go get some nachos and rehash old times. ’”
Emma narrowed her gaze at her friend. “You are not helping. ”
Chelsea shrugged. “Sorry. But I’m having a difficult time wrapping my head around the fact that the guy you are more afraid of than anything in this life shows up where you work, Luke comes in and helps you out, and then you thank him by dumping him. ”
“Obviously I’m having a hard time clarifying the situation. ”
Chelsea took a sip of wine, then said, “Obviously. So why don’t you tell me what’s really going on?”
“I don’t know. I guess I’m just scared. ”
“Well, no shit, Shirley. You should be scared. I would have been. After the way you described the hell that Vaughn put you through, I would have been terrified the minute he walked through my door. ”
“I was. I never expected to see him again. ”
“He thinks he owns you. Do you really think something like a restraining order is going to stop him?”
“I did. After all these years of no contact, I thought he was over it. Over me. ”
“He was just lying in wait, waiting for you to show up back here. ”
She pondered that over a couple swallows of wine. “And now I’m back. ”
“And so is he. ”
“But he violated the restraining order. They arrested him. He could go to jail. ”
Chelsea waved her hand. “He thinks of you as his property, Emma. The man is obviously demented. You don’t think a piece of paper is going to stop him, do you?”
She sighed. “I don’t know. I didn’t think beyond getting him the hell out of my clinic last night. ”
“Which you should thank Luke for. I still don’t understand what’s going on between the two of you. ”
“I’m in love with him. ”
“Ohhh,” Chelsea said. “And the light dawns. You love him, and that scares you. Because in your beautifully confused head, you think he’s going to turn into some raving maniac like Vaughn who’s going to chain you in the basement and beat you if you raise your voice to him. ”
Tears pricked her eyes. “I don’t know. Maybe. I fought so hard to get away from Vaughn, spent years getting my sense of self and my independence back. I don’t want to turn all that over to some guy again just because I might think I’m in love with him. ”
“Honey. Luke isn’t just some guy. And do you really think he’s anything at all like Vaughn?”
“The logical part of me says no. The scared part of me says I don’t have any idea what any man is capable of once you give your heart to him. ”
Chelsea put her wineglass down and scooted over to pull Emma into her arms. “None of us knows what any man is capable of down the road. That’s what trust is about. Not only do you have to trust him, you have to trust in yourself that you chose the right man. ”
She sighed. “I didn’t do such a good job of that the first time. ”
“That was his fault, not yours. ”
“No, it was mine, too. I stayed with him and let him have that power over me because I was too afraid to walk away, too embarrassed by what I’d become. ”
“No, that was abuse, and you need to recognize the difference. And you did make a choice to get away. A lot of women never do. You should be proud of yourself for all the positive changes you’ve made in your life since you left him. ”
She pulled away and looked at Chelsea. “I am. I’m damn proud of all I’ve done. Which is why I’m also damn scared of chasing down that rabbit hole again. Love scares me, Chelse. ”
“Love scares all of us, Emma. It’s probably the scariest thing any of us will ever do. To hand your heart over to someone who could crush it i
n their hands is the biggest step we’ll ever take. But when you do take that step, you have to know it’s for all the right reasons and for the right guy. The only guy. The one you trust completely, the one you know would never hurt you. ”
Emma stared into the wineglass, the red liquid answering none of her questions. “I just don’t know what to do. ”
“It’ll come to you. In the meantime, watch your back. And keep your gun close in case that crazy person is lurking around. ”
She leaned back against the sofa. “As far as Vaughn is concerned, my eyes are wide open. ”
EMMA MIGHT NOT want him in her life anymore, but Luke was still going to watch over her. Between running leads on the drug burglaries, he drove past her clinic and made periodic drive-by checks on her house at night.
Vaughn had made bail, with a court date set up for the next month. Which meant he’d need to stick around, though Luke would bet the bastard was lurking nearby anyway. He asked his fellow cops to keep an eye out for him and to let Luke know if they spotted the guy anywhere near Emma. They promised they would.
Since there’d been no break-ins for the past week, they were all working single shifts again. Which meant Luke could get in some gym time. He hit the basketball court with Will and Carter and a few other guys, some of them cops, some of them friends from school.
He needed the stress release. Too much had been going on lately, and he was wound tight.
“Hey, princess. You gonna hold the ball and daydream all night, or are we going to play some basketball?”
He looked at Carter, then dribbled around him and shot into the basket.
“Asshole,” Carter said with a grin.
“You called me a princess. You’re lucky I didn’t knee you in the balls on my way around you to the basket. ”
“You ladies gonna stand around and gossip all night, or are we gonna play ball?”
Carter and Luke turned to Evan, who waited on the other side of the court.
Carter laughed. “Let’s go break a sweat. ”
In an hour, Luke was drenched in sweat and more than ready for a water break.
“You’re out of shape, McCormack,” Evan said as he downed a bottle of water. “I can’t believe you missed that layup. ”
“I can’t believe you were picking your butt and missed that pass,” Luke shot back. “Maybe you need a haircut. Or are you bucking for the town police calendar, so you’re letting it grow out in hopes some of the ladies will vote you in?”
“It sure can’t be based on his physique,” Deacon, one of the other cops playing, shot back. “He’s got more of a one-pack. ”
Evan lifted up his shirt to show off what even Luke had to admit was a mighty impressive eight-pack.
“I’m not the one sucking down all the beer after work, Deacon. You can kiss my ass. And they couldn’t pay me to do that calendar. ”
“So maybe it’s a lady you’re doing all those crunches for,” Carter said.
Evan went to the cooler for another water. “I’ve got no comment. ”
“So . . . no lady,” Deacon said. “Otherwise he’d be bragging about it. That must mean he’s spending all his time at the gym because he’s only got his right hand for company. ”
Evan frowned. “Are we gonna play ball here or what?”
“See?” Deacon said. “It’s the only thing he knows. Playing with his balls. ”
Luke let out a snort. Trash-talking was always the best part of playing basketball. Fortunately, they all genuinely liked each other or there would have been bloodletting by the end of the game.
“How’s it going with your girl?” Carter asked him during a break as they swiped sweat from their faces with their towels.