My Justice My Revenge

  “How and why is that possible?” I asked.

  “How? They just walk in. To answer the second part of your question ‘why’, because during the course of their travels they have to go into some bad areas defending their clients and may have to protect themselves. No one wants them to get hurt, except us, of course. If anyone wants to get anything in here, they just have to give it to an employee.” I could tell that he did not like the policy but had to work with it.

  After a tour of the courthouse we went to the entrance where I learned how to process people through. “Stay in control but be people friendly,” was the motto.

  Chapter 26

  After ten months of working in screening, the now Corporal Ramirez, asked me to come and work the tunnel with him. The tunnel was an area where the inmates from the jail were brought over to the courthouse for court. There were hallways between the floors to securely transport the inmates.

  I spoke with Ramirez and asked who else was working there. He told me Allan Topseed, Danielle Lee, and Birdie. I hadn’t remembered if I had met Danielle or Allen, but I would never forget Birdie. It sounded like a plan so starting the following Monday I was tunnel bound.

  What I found out in a hurry was that Danielle was doing the job I was now to do and she did not like the idea of training someone who was taking her job. I noticed this, as she would smack my hand with a ruler if I “invaded” her area. Even so, the five of us hit it off right away. I learned the job and after a week I was not getting smacked as Danielle was “running” inmates to and from court. It was a job she came to like somewhat.

  After a very short time Ramirez was transferred back to screening. Corporal Jillian Monroe was sent up to the tunnel as our new supervisor. As it turned out she was just as fun loving as the rest of us. There was a time for work and if time permitted, a time for play.

  Another change was that Birdie retired and after a hell of a send off party that took us weeks to recover from we still missed her. Birdie decided to become a snowbird and move south. This opened the door for Robert “Bobbie” Jamieson to join our crowd, which had begun being called the click. Bobbie also fit into the group.

  The five of us were soon going over to each other’s house with our spouses. Stephanie loved meeting my co-workers and their husbands and wives. We would get together every other month. Then at times we would go out after work just the five of us. It was a lot of laughs and just good times.

  We had been together for three years when one afternoon we decided to go out after work for dinner and a drink. After making all the calls to make sure nobody at home had plans we decided to go to Cheeseburger in Paradise. It was a Jimmy Buffett restaurant.

  We arrived at five-fifteen. We were seated in a booth under a mural of a Key West sun set. The restaurant had murals all around, on every wall. The center where the bar was had dock posts and ropes with an assortment of items hanging from the ropes.

  Under the half-inch of varnish were post cards from Florida. One had an alligator on it saying, “Send more tourists.” The place oozed fun, and we were the ones to squeeze out every last laugh.

  Our waiter, Antonio, quickly appeared and took our drink order, two Margaritas for the ladies and three Miller Lite beers for the guys, large drafts. There were also three appetizers ordered.

  The drinks arrived amidst the talking, music, and laughter. As I finished three-quarters of my beer, Allan noticed that my glass was chipped. When our waiter came by Allan mentioned about the glass. “Antonio, my good friend Timmy has a chipped glass. He was lucky not to have cut his lip,” said Allan.

  It was just a small crack in the glass, nothing sharp or dangerous. But Antonio proceeded to get distressed by it and asked me over and over, “Are you all right sir?”

  I said, “Everything is fine,” to the waiter and told Allan, “stop your whining.”

  “I’ll get you a new beer, sir.” He then started to take the glass away. I stopped him. There was one swallow left and I wanted to enjoy it. So, I hoisted the glass and drank it down.

  Two minutes later the manager was delivering me my free drink, which I said was not necessary, but since he insisted. After eating I ordered one more beer. When Antonio came to take the order I had placed a corn chip in my glass and said to him, “This glass has a chip in it too.” He laughed, but said only one chipped glass per day.

  When we left Antonio received a very good tip for putting up with us. We walked out side to a wonderful evening. It was eight o’clock and the moon was entering the sky with the sun refusing to go down. We said our good-byes and each headed home. I was hoping Stephanie would be up and sitting outside by the pool.

  * * *

  When I walked into the house I looked out the sliding glass door to see Tony, his girlfriend Paula Kammes, and Stephanie were sitting near the pool on the deck. What luck, and what a great day. I went into the refrigerator to get a bottle of beer, and went out to join them.

  “I was hoping you would be out here,” I said to Stephanie. “How are you guys doing?”

  “Fine,” both Tony and Paula answered.

  “How was dinner?” Stephanie asked.

  “It was very good. We had a blast.” I went on to tell the story about the chipped glass, everyone was laughing. The moon was now directly above us in all its brilliance.

  The conversation moved from several different topics until Paula said to Tony, “You should tell them.” Both Stephanie and I had noticed Tony had started a dialogue with us several times lately only to stop and walk away. We had tried to get him to talk with us but he would say he forgot what he was saying. We figured he would explain it to us when he was ready.

  When Paula said those words it seemed like everything stopped and all eyes were on Tony. We had just been talking about his Godfather, Jeffrey Motter and the facts about why we didn’t see him anymore.

  That was when Tony said, “I hope I never see that bastard again.”

  He started choking on his words a little. His breathing became labored and his head dropped as low as it could go. “He molested me.”

  If an atom bomb had gone off right next to me it would not have been any more of a shock. Talk about going from a high to a low, this was a plane crash.

  Stephanie was the first to move to Tony. “Are you okay?” she asked, sounding as if it had just occurred.

  “This happened when I was about eight years old,” he cried.

  I knew exactly how Stephanie felt because for years to come I would feel as if it had just happened. In my mind it had just occurred. With Stephanie asking all the questions to make sure Tony was all right, I went into a police mode.

  I knew I would not ask specific questions. I would leave that to the police and the Children Center, which handled all cases of child abuse.

  We found out that Tony recently told Paula of the abuse and she told him to tell us. They had been trying for a while but it was hard for Tony to do. He was concerned how it would affect both Stephanie and me. He did not want to upset us.

  I asked Tony, “What do you want to do?”

  “I want to stop him before he does it again.” Paula sat at his side, with Stephanie to the other side. Paula held his hand and provided him with the strength he needed to continue. “He hurt me and in some ways I’ll never be the same. I know what he has taken from me I don’t want anyone else to go through this.”

  “Tony, we’ll stand beside you in anything you decide. I want you to know if you start this it may be you who will be under fire. He will have no defense and his attorneys will come after you.” I wanted him to know the reality of the situation before we started anything.

  I couldn’t believe I could sit there and discuss this with him and not be going out of my mind. Did I really lose so much of my heart that I wasn’t affected by what I was hearing? But I guess it is the same mechanism I used to forget when I would pick up body parts of someone struck by a train. A defense mechanism or I would have long ago gone crazy.

  “Dad, I want t
o do this. Will you help me?”

  “I will be by your side the whole way, unless you tell me different.” I knew there would probably be things he would not want me to hear. There would be some things that would be too difficult to discuss in front of me.

  I went inside the house and brought my cell phone outside. I called detective Evan Tonka. I told Tonka basically what Tony had told me. Most of the abuses that had taken place occurred in Lakeville, which meant Lakeville police department would investigate the crimes.

  By this time I had known Tonka for over thirty years. We had remained good friends after I left the police department. It was already eleven o’clock by the time I called. Tonka said he would come by the house tomorrow at ten in the morning.

  We sat outside for a while longer just talking but everyone’s mind was on what had just been said. Paula had to go home so Tony drove her. Stephanie and I went up to bed. With not much talking we lay side by side then just waited for morning. There was not much sleeping that was going to happen tonight.

  Chapter 27

  Stephanie and I woke up at six in the morning. Neither of us slept for more than two or three hours. There was a slight drizzle of rain falling outside. There was a peculiar gray to the day. It was almost as if the day was fitting for what was to come. There would be a lot of dark secrets brought out into the light today. This would be the start of the longest chapter in our lives. Even I could not know how many peaks and valleys were in store. And the valleys, no one could have known how very deep they would go. They would go so deep that life itself would be put to a test.

  At nine-fifty a black Ford Crown Victoria pulled up in front of our house. It had no police markings but it was very identifiable as a police car. Four doors, outside spotlight, a car that was purchased with thousands of other police cars state wide to save money.

  Out of the driver’s door stepped Evan Tonka. He was dressed in a dark blue polo shirt, black dressed pants, and black shoes. He had his service weapon on his belt next to his police badge. He walked up covering his head from the rain with his metal clipboard. Once on the front porch he rang the doorbell.

  Stephanie went to answer the door as Tony and I waited in the family room. When Tonka entered he gave Stephanie a hug and a little rub on the back. They then joined us.

  I stood and offered my hand to Tonka. Greetings were exchanged. He then walked over to Tony and asked how he was doing. “I’m okay now, but you may want to ask me later.”

  Tonka explained he wanted to take Tony downstairs to get his statement, “Will that be all right with you?”

  “Whatever you think would be right,” I told him.

  “After I’m done with Tony I would like to question both of you. We can probably do that with both of you together. Tony, if you could hang around for a while after I’m done talking to your parents, I may have some additional questions for you.” He then walked up to Tony and inquired; “This is what you want to do, right?”

  Tony just shook his head yes. I could tell he was becoming apprehensive again. I was feeling that I had let him down before. I was a cop, trained to spot these things. How did this go on without my knowledge? I failed him before and now he was going off with someone who was going to ask very difficult questions. The only thing that was a relief was my knowing Tonka and Tony knowing him too.

  I asked Tony, “Are you sure about this?”

  “Yes.” With that he turned and led Tonka down the stairs to the basement.

  Tonka advised Tony he was not going to ask graphic questions at this time. He explained how the Children’s Center would have a detective come out to interview him, but he assured Tony he would be present when the interview took place.

  “Who did this to you?” Tonka asked first.

  “Jeffrey Motter.”

  “Where did it occur?”

  “Mostly at his house in Lakeville but also in Florida, Colorado, and California.”

  “When did this happen?”

  “When I was eight to ten years old.”

  “How do you remember when it happened?”

  “I remember once it was Christmas. We went to his house to play a game he bought for me.”

  “You said ‘we’ who are we?”

  “My brother Douglas was always there with me.”

  “Did anything happen to him?”

  “No, I don’t think so. He never said anything to me about that and at one point I told him and my friend about what happened but made them promise never to tell.”

  “Who is your friend you told?”

  “Ken Saucer, but I haven’t talked to him for a long time, he has moved away. I’m not sure what he would remember.”

  Tonka continued for about twenty minutes asking basic questions to get a picture of what had happened. When he was done he asked Tony if he had any questions for him. “Not really. But… do you know when he’ll get locked up. I don’t want him coming here and bothering me or my parents.”

  “Don’t worry about that, I’ll do my best to get a high bond and he will go right to jail.”

  They walked upstairs and Stephanie and I then escorted Tonka back down.

  * * *

  When we arrived at the bottom of the stairs Detective Tonka had us sit down on the couch. He sat in the chair across from us. It was slightly awkward being in our own house and having Tonka take over the authority in the household. I knew he was in the police mode and he would conduct the interviews professionally and compassionately. The questions were of a volatile nature. But there was no way around them.

  “Well, I guess we should get started,” Tonka said. “I have all your personal information already so I’ll get to the meat of the matter.” He shifted in his chair because he thought I would critique him on his questioning techniques. I, however, could not care about how he got the job done, just for him to get it done.

  “When did you learn of this happening to your son?”

  “It was just yesterday.” I continued to tell him how my day had gone and how the subject had come up. He asked general and specific questions. After some questions he would look back at notes taken earlier from Tony’s interview, then look back at our answers.

  Tonka was thorough and left no question unasked. He asked, “What did you specifically ask Tony about the crimes?” The question hinted of me possibly leading Tony with some of his answers.

  “I didn’t ask one, not one, question of the crimes. I’m not so sure I want to know exactly what that bastard did to him. I’m trying to keep myself under control and not lose it. That might toss me over the edge.” I was starting to break up and the words came out chopped and my breath was short. “This is going to be what Tony wants. I let him down and didn’t protect him once, it won’t happen again.”

  After almost an hour we walked back upstairs. Tony was seated on a sofa. He was watching and whistling at the birds. The male cock-a-too was screeching up a whole series of whistles and screeches. I walked up to Tony and motioned for him to follow me. He followed me as we went into the kitchen where we were alone.

  “Are you all right?” I asked. He looked me in my eye and shook his head yes. “Do you want to continue? This was the easy interview. Things will get tougher as we go along. Since Motter is guilty they’ll have to attack you. Are you ready for that?” As I spoke he kept eye-to-eye contact, never once looking away.

  “I am. I don’t want him to hurt anyone else. I understand now how I was taken advantage of. Tonka said he’ll get him off the streets.” His eyes still on mine but now they were turning glassy. He then turned away, “Dad, let’s do it.”

  “Okay, son. I’ll stay right by you and I will watch so you won’t be hurt again.” I meant those words as much as any words I have ever said, but the facts I had come to learn showed me, I could not totally protect him.

  * * *

  A few days later I received a call from Tonka who told me he had contacted the DuPaca County Children’s Center about Tony’s allegations. Every report of sexual abuse
of children went through the Center. The county had set up what was to become a victim’s rights for sexual abuse.

  One of the first guidelines that was written was the victim would only have one in- depth interview. The police department would just do a primitive report with no in-depth talk about what offenses actually occurred. It would be just a basic report of sexual abuse. A report only used to initiate further investigation.

  This was done so that the victim would not have to relive the abuse over and over again. It made the process of gathering information easier for the victim.

  Tonka said the case was turned over to investigator Paul Hennesey. I was familiar with Hennesey as he used to work with the Mayfield Police Department. I had seen him on occasion at calls when I worked in Lakeville but never worked directly with him. He was well respected by his peers.

  Tonka said he would continue as lead detective along with Hennesey. They would be the investigating team. Hennesey wanted to speak with Tony, Stephanie, and I. He wanted to do a more comprehensive interview with all of us, including Douglas, this time.

  Tonka would be present during the interviews to add any of his expertise. We set up the meeting for tomorrow at six in the evening.

  When the time came we were waiting in the living room. Hennesey and Tonka arrived in the same car. They came into our house and Hennesey declared how and what would be occurring. They would interview Tony first then Douglas, Stephanie and me last.

  Tony again went downstairs to be interviewed, only this time it was at great length. This time, everything would come out. Tony was with investigators Hennesey and Tonka for a little over two hours. When he came up the stairs this time his eyes were red, he looked somewhat disheveled.

  Hennesey said he did well. He said he was very believable and would have a strong case on his testimony alone. They then went downstairs with Douglas. As they were walking down I was talking to Tony.

  “Are you all right? If you want, if this is going to be too hard, we can stop it.”

  “It’s going to be hard, I know that now, but I started it and I will finish it.” I just wanted to hug him for being so brave. I believe a tear swelled up in my eye.