Lost Love

  I nodded and looked at Chloe. “Chloe, are you okay with your Daddy and I dating each other?”

  She grinned. “Oh yes! Daddy’s been so sad and lonely. But he said he isn’t sad anymore and his eyes aren’t sad either. Your kisses make him happy. So kiss him again, Paxton!”

  Steed and I both laughed. When we caught each other’s gaze, Steed leaned in and pressed his lips against my ear and spoke so only I could hear him. “And me buried inside of you will make me even happier. So let’s plan that…soon.”

  My stomach dropped at the delicious thought. All I could do was whisper back a needy, “Yes.”

  I was going fucking insane. Sighing, I shut the books I was looking through and leaned back in my chair.

  Fuck. I couldn’t get her out of my mind. Last night I thought for sure I was going to rip her goddamn panties off and fuck her in my truck. The need to be inside her was growing by the minute. I wanted to respect her wish to take things slow. To date her, slowly bringing her into Chloe’s and my world, but this was insane.

  The last few weeks had been amazing though, if you didn’t take into account my constantly hard dick and the never-ending times I had to jack off in the shower. Paxton and I spent an equal amount of time with each other as we did with Chloe. Paxton’s fear was that Chloe would grow to resent her for taking my time away, but the opposite had happened. Grinning, I thought back to this morning with Chloe.

  “Good morning, pumpkin,” I whispered as I kissed her cheek.

  Chloe opened her eyes and grinned. “Is today the day you’re going to marry Paxton?”

  Laughing, I gazed into her beautiful blue eyes. “Not today.”

  She frowned. “Well, will you make me pancakes then?”

  “Yes! That I can do.”

  Jumping up, Chloe raced down the stairs and into the kitchen. Pulling the chair at the island out, she climbed up while I gathered everything needed for pancakes.

  “Daddy, why is Paxton so different from my old mommy?”

  My heart seized up. “Well, your mother doesn’t have love in her heart. Paxton does.”

  “Why doesn’t she have love in her heart?”

  “I don’t know, pumpkin. Some people only think of themselves and not others.”

  She stared out the window as I poured the batter onto the pan.

  “Daddy, do I have to call her my mommy anymore?”

  Lifting my hand to the side of her face, I tried not to let her see how I was dying inside. I hated that Kim was Chloe’s mother. “No, Chloe. You don’t have to call her mommy if you don’t want to. She’s never going to be in our lives again.”

  “She doesn’t want to be my mommy, does she?”

  Fuck. Did I tell her the truth? What would that do to her emotionally?

  “Pumpkin, she doesn’t deserve to be your mommy.”

  Her little eyes seemed lost in thought, before a huge smile covered her face. “Paxton’s going to be my new mommy soon. You really need to hurry, Daddy.”

  Laughing, I kissed her on the tip of her nose. “You’re bossy. Just like Paxton.”

  Her eyes lit up, and I didn’t think I’d ever seen my daughter look so happy.

  “I want to be like her! Just like her! I wonder if Paxton wants a pet goat too. Patches needs a friend.”

  Stopping what I was doing, I shook my head and winked. “You little stinker. Are you trying to figure out how to get yourself another goat?”

  Her little hands covered her mouth as she giggled and nodded.

  “Chloe Lynn Parker. You’re a sneaky one.”

  My eyes drifted back to the ranch’s financial books, and I felt my cheeks straining from the happiness of the memory. I shook my head and got back to work.

  Something was off. Numbers weren’t making sense, and I had a feeling the old CPA who took care of my father’s books was up to no good. Dad wanted to hire that fucker Mike, but I put the halt on that when the asshole tried to hook up with Paxton. I sent his ass back to San Antonio almost two weeks ago. I didn’t have a good feeling about him from the moment he set foot in my office and Dad introduced us.

  Asshole. Of course if it hadn’t been for him, I’d have never have gone to the bar that night, and Paxton wouldn’t have asked me to take her home. When she started for her bedroom I couldn’t help the dirty thoughts that flashed through my mind. My dick was growing hard remembering her in my arms. Naked. Her soft skin against mine.

  Fuck. I wanted her.

  I pushed all thoughts of my cock inside Paxton’s pussy out of my mind and got back to reviewing last months’ figures.

  The knock on the door had me lifting my gaze.

  “Steed?”

  “Dad.” I motioned for my father to sit down.

  He walked into the room with all the confidence in the world. I remember being little and thinking I wanted to walk into a room like my father did. I constantly heard people say the most amazing things about my father, and as a little boy looking up to him, I knew I wanted to be just like him someday. The guilt of staying away from the family ranch business still weighed heavy on my heart.

  “How’s it going, son? Find what you were looking for?”

  He leaned back in the large leather chair opposite my desk. Dad had insisted that I have an office in the main house. Right next door to his. Within a day of telling my father I was coming back home, he had the office ready. A large mahogany desk sat near the large floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked the Texas Hill Country. In front of the desk were two large, oversized leather chairs that Mom had picked out. To the left was a sitting area with a sofa and table. The other side held a large table. Dad had used this space as a conference room before I moved back, and I had talked him into keeping it one as well.

  Shit. How in the hell do I tell my father I suspected his former CPA was stealing from him?

  “I think so.”

  “Trevor need to be here? I can give him a call.”

  My brother Trevor had an office as well, but it was down in the main barn, along with the two-bedroom studio where Trevor lived. Since he was the foreman, he wanted to be closer to the barn so Dad had the studio built onto the barn.

  The barn. If you could call it that. Dad’s prized horses were housed in the main barn. The damn thing had heat and air conditioning and I swore the stalls were nicer than my first loft apartment in Oregon.

  “Nah, I don’t think he cares too much about the logistics of numbers.”

  My father chuckled. “Then give it to me.”

  “I don’t know how to tell you this, Dad, so I’m just going to say it. I think Fred was stealing from you.”

  I figured he’d laugh. Tell me I was insane and that I needed to look through the books again. Instead, he leaned forward, put his arms on his legs and cursed.

  “Motherfucker. I knew it.”

  My eyes widened. “What? You knew Fred was stealing, and you didn’t do anything?”

  When his head dropped, I had to fight the urge to comfort him. If there was one thing I knew about my father, it was that he didn’t show emotion. Weakness. Anything, when it came to his business.

  His head was still down. Fuck. Was he upset? Or was he just that mad?

  Finally, he looked up and I had my answer.

  He was mad.

  Hell, he was pissed.

  “That pencil whipping, son-of-a-bitch, asshole, money hungry, dirt bag, asshole, fucker!”

  Oh yeah, real pissed.

  I chuckled. “You said asshole twice.”

  He glared at me. Apparently now was not the time for joking. “I want him dead.”

  “Well, I’m sure Cord knows a guy who knows a guy.”

  His eyes met mine, and I was almost sure he was trying to shoot daggers at me. “Okay, we’re still not in the joking phase yet?” I asked.

  “Find out how much the fucker took. I’ve been waiting for an excuse to beat his ass ever since he hit on your mother.”

  He stood and started for the door. I jumped up. “W
ait, Fred hit on Mom? When?”

  Dad glanced over his shoulder. “At our wedding reception.”

  My brows furrowed. “But y’all have been good friends. Why have you never done anything?”

  “Because I’m a Parker, and we don’t have to worry about our women looking elsewhere when they’ve got it all with us.”

  I snarled at the thought of my father and mother that way. My body shuddered.

  “And I knew I didn’t have to worry about your mother, I trust her. But Fred was another thing. Why do you think I kept the fucker so close to me all those years? I figured he’d have tried to go after your mother again, but steal from me? Oh, hell no. I’ve been waiting for another reason to kick his ass and now, thanks to my son getting off his stupid ass and coming home, I’ve finally got him.”

  He opened the door and closed it behind him. I smiled…until I realized my father hadn’t just given me a compliment. He’d insulted me.

  Another light knock on the door, and Amelia walked in. “Hey, I thought you were out of town.”

  She frowned. “The book event got cancelled. What’s going on with Dad? He looked pissed.”

  I waved it off. “Apparently he’s been in a pissing contest with Fred for forty years.”

  “Huh?” Amelia asked with a confused expression.

  Laughing, I replied, “It’s nothing.” No need for me to tell Amelia about Fred’s stealing. If Dad wanted the rest of the family to know, he would tell them.

  She curled up in the leather chair and smiled at me.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Oh nothing. Just wondering how things are going with you and Paxton.”

  The simple mention of her name made my heart skip a beat. “They’re going good. Slow, but good.”

  She lifted her brow. “Slow? How so? Y’all are with each other all the time.”

  I dropped my head and gave her a taste of her own medicine. I shot a really pained look.

  Her mouth opened as her head kicked back. “Oh! Slow as in the sex area.”

  “Yes, and please don’t say anything else to Chloe. I know it’s you filling her head about marriage.”

  She appeared to be offended. “Excuse me, but I haven’t mentioned anything about y’all getting married. Not one word.”

  “You haven’t?” I asked.

  “Nope. I’d take that shit up with our mother.”

  Damn. Mom. I hadn’t even thought about it coming from her.

  “Anyway, back to the sex. What’s going on?”

  I shrugged. “Paxton wants to go slow. So I’m going slow. Painfully fucking slow.”

  Amelia covered her mouth and giggled.

  I sighed. “It’s not funny. I go to sleep with blue balls and wake up with them.”

  “Ew. Seriously, I could have done without that bit of information, Steed.” She made a gagging noise.

  I laughed and pushed my hand through my hair. “Anyway, I don’t know if I push a little harder or let her pick the pace.”

  “Want my advice?”

  “No offense, squirt, but you’re only twenty-two.”

  She gave me a dirty look. “Well, I’m a woman. I’ve dated. I’ve had sex. I think I can add my two cents.”

  Anger rushed through my body. “Who the fuck have you had sex with? I’ll kick the asshole’s ass.”

  “You didn’t honestly think I was still a virgin, did you?”

  I threw the pen out of my hand like it had burnt me. My hands covered my ears. “What the hell, Meli! Oh God.” My hands dropped. “Do the rest of your brothers know this bit of information?”

  An evil smile moved over her face. “My first was Bobby Bishop.”

  My eyes widened in shock. “Does Trevor know his best friend took your flower?”

  Amelia lost it laughing. “My flower? What in the hell? Are you fucking kidding me right now, Steed?” She bent over laughing hysterically. “Oh. My. God. My flower! I’m dying! I can’t wait to tell Waylynn! You know she’s lost her flower too, right?”

  I rolled my eyes and leaned back in the chair, waiting for her to get it out of her system. The thought of a guy touching either of my sisters pissed me off. Even with Waylynn being married, I still wanted to punch her husband every time I thought about it. “You done?” I asked.

  She wiped her tears away. “Oh, man. Hells bells. I needed that laugh. And no, I certainly didn’t tell Trevor.”

  “I take it my ideas of you being a sweet and innocent girl are shot out the door.”

  Standing, Amelia placed her hands on my desk. “I grew up with five brothers. Five brothers who I might add have made their own reputations. I learned from the best.” She winked.

  “Oh, shit. If Dad ever knew…”

  The smirk that spread over my sister’s face had me smiling too.

  “What Dad doesn’t know, doesn’t hurt him.”

  “Daddy’s little angel.” I tsked.

  She let out a curt laugh and spun on her heels. Before she made it to the door, she stopped, put her hands on her hips, and let a wicked smile spread over her face.

  “And by the way. I’m giving you my two cents on Paxton. You need to spend the night with her tonight, seduce her, and make love to her, and then spend the rest of the night fucking her to make up for lost time. Trust me. It’s what she really wants deep down. This going slow shit is a safety net she’s using because she’s scared.”

  I pulled my head back. “Scared of what?”

  She winked. “I can’t tell you all the secrets now, can I?”

  And like that, she was out the door.

  “What crawled up your ass, dude?”

  I rode next to Trevor on the horse my parents had bought me for graduation. I had never even ridden her before I left town. Now, I tried to ride her every day. She was a beautiful red and white paint that would do anything I asked her to do. Trevor broke her and trained her. I swear the boy missed his calling.

  “Nothing’s crawled up my ass. What’s crawled up your ass, asshole?”

  He laughed. “I ask a question, and you’re either so deep in thought you don’t hear me or you snap at me. Dude, if you don’t get laid soon I swear you’re gonna burst.”

  “Fuck off, Trevor.”

  “See!”

  I groaned. “Shit. I don’t know what to do. Amelia gave me her thoughts, but I’m not sure.”

  “Well, she’s a woman, so she would probably know better than us.”

  We walked our horses side by side through the pasture. “Damn, I missed this place. Missed riding next to you, Mitchell, Tripp, and Cord.”

  “This place missed you.”

  I smiled. That was Trevor’s way of saying he missed me. “You still friends with Bobby Bishop?”

  Trevor brought his horse to a stop. “Why?”

  Shrugging, I replied, “Just wondering.”

  “I haven’t talked to him since I beat his ass one night. I caught him feeling Amelia up behind his truck at a party.”

  Laughing, I shook my head.

  “I was positive Mitchell would find some reason to arrest him, and Cord probably threatened him with how he knew someone who knew someone who would break his leg and arm.”

  Damn, we all think the same.

  I chuckled, and we rode the next few minutes in silence. “So listen, I went over the books. Fred’s been stealing from Dad.”

  “No shit,” Trevor said, kicking his horse, picking up her pace to keep up with mine.

  “Yeah. Dad didn’t seem surprised. In fact, I think he knew. He just didn’t want to admit it.”

  “That’s why he’s been pushing you to look at the books since you scared Mike away.”

  “I didn’t scare him away.”

  “Keep telling yourself that.”

  I didn’t want to let Trevor know how much Fred had taken. It wasn’t small change. It was thousands of dollars. When I told my father Fred had taken close to three hundred thousand, I thought he was going to have a heart attack. After he let out a strin
g of curses, some I’d never heard of before, he got up, went to his gun safe and said he would be back later. I didn’t even bother trying to stop him. I knew he wouldn’t do something stupid, but he sure as shit would scare the piss out of good ole Fred.

  “Was it a lot of money?”

  Glancing over to him, I nodded. “Yeah. It was a lot of money.”

  “Fucker. I hope Dad puts his ass in jail.”

  “Let’s hope.”

  We checked one of the fence lines and started back for the main barn when we found it still in good shape.

  “You still roping?” I asked.

  He looked at me like I was crazy. “I’m a rancher, asshat. I rope shit all the time.”

  My brow lifted. “So, what? You just ride around roping calves or something?”

  “Why? You afraid you’ve lost your touch living as a city boy all those years?”

  “Don’t you wish. I can probably still rope circles around you.”

  “Prove it then.”

  I was the one who taught this little shit how to rope in the first place. If he thought he was better than me I was going to have to show his ass up.

  “First one back to the barn,” I said as I kicked my horse. She took off like a bolt of damn lightening.

  Holy shit. This horse is fast.

  There was no way I could help the smile on my face. Running through an open field on horseback was the best feeling in the world. Nothing was more beautiful. More calming.

  As we approached the barn, I saw her. Sitting on top of the fence while Cord worked a horse in the corral. My heart stopped, and I brought Lady to a stop. Trevor raced by and headed to the barn, winning our bet. I didn’t care, though. The only thing I cared about was the beautiful sight before me. I was wrong earlier; there was something more beautiful than running through a field on horseback.

  Paxton Monroe.

  Her hair was pulled up in a sloppy bun with half of it sticking out wild and untamed. She had on jeans, a T-shirt, and boots. A far cry from the sweet, innocent look she had on earlier today when she picked up Chloe for the mommy daughter spa day.

  Slipping off Lady, I walked us over to the pen. Paxton looked at me over her shoulder. Her smile about knocked me off my feet.