Lost Love

  “Fuck… You’re so wet, baby.”

  Her eyes closed and she lifted her hips, silently begging me to enter her body.

  I brought my hand back up and rested on my elbows, both hands cradling her head. Our gazes locked, and I slowly pushed into her.

  “Steed,” she gasped as we became one. I let out a soft moan and stayed perfectly still for a few moments…needing to feel her pussy throbbing around me.

  Christ, this is perfection.

  Neither one of us had to say a word. We were both lost within each other. I slowly pulled out and pushed back in, causing Paxton to dig her nails into my back.

  My lips moved across her neck softly and slowly before I kissed the soft skin under her ear. “Paxton Monroe. You are my life. The only woman I will ever love.”

  My body was spent. Two rounds of amazing sex with Steed and countless orgasms today, and I was a puddle of mushy happiness. We laid on the blanket, our bodies tangled up with one another, as we stared out at the beautiful view in front of us.

  “How do you feel?” Steed asked while his fingertips moved lightly across my arm.

  “Amazing. Wonderful. Marvelous. Fantastic. Satisfied. Relaxed.”

  The rumble in his chest from his laughter moved through my body. I had never felt so elated in my life.

  “I’m glad you feel all of that.”

  “And more,” I added. “So much more.”

  Our heads turned to each other. The love in Steed’s eyes warmed my heart. He gently traced his fingertip over my face, lips, and jaw. Everywhere he touched I was on fire. Not to mention it sent my stomach into a frenzy of twists and turns.

  “I like the more part the best,” he softly said.

  Reaching down, he wove his fingers with mine. The sun was sinking farther down the sky.

  “May I ask you something, Pax?”

  “Of course you can,” I answered as I looked at him.

  “The tattoo on your foot, when did you get it?”

  Glancing down at the scrolled tattoo that read “Let It Be”, I drew in a deep breath and blew it out.

  “I got it after my last counseling session. I picked that phrase because it had finally hit me that what I really needed to do was let go. That I couldn’t let my sadness and anger control my life. I needed to let it be. Go the way fate was taking me and know that it would all work out someday.”

  Steed sat up and ran his finger over the tattoo before glancing back at me. “I love you. I love your strength, your faith, and your kind soul. You’re amazing.”

  Smiling, I sat up and placed my hand on the side of his face. “Thank you for that.”

  His hand cupped the back of my neck, drawing me closer to him. The kiss was soft and gentle. It was the perfect way to end this part of the evening.

  “We should get dressed before Trevor shows up.”

  He nodded, but the disappointment in his eyes was evident.

  “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

  We both stood and silently got dressed. Then we settled back on the blanket, me between his legs with my head resting against his solid chest. The sun was touching the hills and turning the sky the most beautiful colors. Pinks and reds spread across the horizon in beautiful wisps of clouds. It was stunning.

  The sound of two vehicles pulling up had us both turning.

  “Who’s driving your truck?” I asked as Steed stood and helped me up.

  A wide smile curled his mouth. “Mitchell. He’s got Chloe.”

  “Chloe?” I asked with my own grin.

  “Yeah, she’s going to join us for movie night. I thought she might like to do that with us.”

  Oh. My. Gosh. This man. Swoon-a-thon going on here.

  The way he loved his daughter did crazy things to my heart. I fell even more in love with him knowing he wanted to make Chloe a part of our day.

  “That sounds amazing!”

  I took his hand in mine and kissed the back of it. “Steed, Chloe is very much a part of our relationship and in no way do I resent anything about that. It warms my heart to see you with Chloe and know how much you love her. She is a part of my heart now too, and I’d give my last breath for her.”

  Steed’s eyes widened in surprise before they filled with tears. He opened his mouth to say something, but instead of speaking, he closed his eyes and slowly shook his head before catching my gaze.

  “I love you so fucking much.” He pulled my body against his and pressed his mouth to mine. The trucks stopped, and I had thought he would let me go, especially knowing Chloe was here. But he didn’t. He held me tighter and kissed me deeper. By the time he was done I was dizzy and had to hold onto his arms to steady myself.

  “Wow,” I breathed.

  He grinned. “I want her to see what true love is.”

  Oh lord. There goes my heart again.

  “Daddy! Paxton!” Chloe said as she ran up to us. Instead of hugging just Steed, her little arms wrapped around both of us. We dropped to her level at the same time. I couldn’t help but smile when I saw how happy she looked, a grin spread wide across her face.

  “I had the best day with Aunt Meli and then Uncle Mitchell picked me up and took me for ice cream! But it wasn’t at the store!”

  Steed pulled his head back with a surprised expression. “It wasn’t? Where was it?” he asked as he glanced up to Mitchell.

  “It was this farm house. Daddy! They made the ice cream and asked me what kind I wanted and if I wanted anything in it!”

  “What did you get?” I asked.

  Chloe smiled. “Chocolate with strawberries cause that’s your favorite, Paxton. And I want to be just like you and grow up to marry a cowboy like my daddy!”

  I was overcome with emotion, and it took every ounce of strength I had not to cry.

  Taking her hands in mine, I replied, “I love that plan, Chloe. So very much.”

  Steed pulled her to him, making her squeal in delight. “Let me help your uncles, then I have a surprise for my two favorite girls. But no more talk of you growing up.”

  Chloe kissed him on the cheek, then reached for my hand. My heart fluttered, and I had to put my other hand over my stomach to calm the butterflies. This sweet little girl held a piece of my heart so strongly I was almost brought to tears.

  I knew Chloe had never had a real mother figure in her life, and I was going to do everything in my power to be there for her, always.

  “Did you and Daddy have fun on your day together?” Chloe asked.

  Gazing down at her big blue eyes, I smiled. “We did. Your daddy is very romantic.”

  She nodded. “He likes sunsets and always says they remind him of his special spot on the ranch. Is this his special spot? Is that why he brought you here?”

  My eyes swept over to where Steed was helping Mitchell and Trevor put Allure into the trailer. I felt breathless watching him. “Yes, Chloe Cat. Your daddy used to bring me here all the time. It was kind of our spot.”

  When I glanced back down at her, she had a dreamy expression on her face. “I hope I can marry a boy someday who is like my daddy.”

  Dropping down to meet her eye to eye, I pulled her in for a hug. “Me too, baby girl.”

  When she leaned back, her little eyes looked deep into mine. “I love you, Paxton.”

  I almost fell on my ass. Her words hit me square in the chest and dug themselves deep within my heart, and I was positive they would stay buried deeply forever. Lifting my hand to the side of her sweet little face, I let out a shaky breath. “Oh, Chloe. I love you too.”

  Her little arms wrapped around my neck and she whispered, “I pray each night you’ll be my mommy. I hope God hears me.”

  Closing my eyes, I struggled to keep the tears back. “I pray for the same thing, Chloe.”

  “Does he hear us?”

  I’d never in my life experienced this feeling before. A love so pure and real it would forever own my heart. “I know he hears us.”

  When she pulled back, I opened my eyes to see
Steed standing behind Chloe. The way he stared at me made my chest squeeze, and my heart take a dive straight to my stomach. I prayed I hadn’t said anything I shouldn’t have, but I wanted to be honest with Chloe. Dropping to his knees, Steed wrapped us both in his arms and slid his hand behind my neck. Pulling me closer, he kissed my lips.

  “I love you both.”

  Chloe giggled. “Kiss me, Daddy! Kiss me!”

  Jumping up, Steed picked up Chloe and kissed her with a quick peck on the mouth then kissed her cheek.

  “Give me some of that loving!” Mitchell said as he took Chloe and started flying her around like a plane. She laughed and cried out as Mitchell traded her off to Trevor.

  I smiled as I watched three of the Parker brothers totally get lost in the love of one little girl. And oh how easy it was to get lost in Chloe’s love.

  Chloe and I snuggled up to Steed as we watched Brother Bear. The temperature had dropped some so we had two quilts pulled over us. I was munching on popcorn and so was Steed.

  When Chloe found out she was part of Steed’s special day with me I thought she was going to burst from happiness. She got to pick out the movies, and so far we had watched Frozen, to which Steed knew the words to every song. I wasn’t sure if I was impressed or turned on. No. I knew I was for sure turned on.

  And now Brother Bear was playing. I couldn’t believe how engrossed I was in the movie. Steed bumped my arm, and I nodded, not wanting to miss anything.

  “Pax, Chloe’s asleep.”

  Pulling my eyes from the movie, I saw that Chloe was snuggled up into the side of Steed.

  Lucky little thing.

  I smiled. “I’m so completely jealous of her right now it’s unreal.”

  He grinned. “You could stay the night, you know.”

  I let my smile fade some. “I don’t want Chloe to know I’m staying the night.”

  “You could sneak out before morning and go into the guest bedroom.”

  My teeth dug into my lip as I thought about it. “Is that why you had me pack a bag?”

  He nodded.

  Bouncing my eyes back and forth from Chloe to Steed, I muttered, “I don’t know.”

  Steed jutted his lip out to pout. “Please? Spend the night with me. I want to sleep with you in my arms.”

  Focusing on Chloe, I took a deep breath. “Okay, but we have to be careful. I don’t want her knowing I’m sleeping with her dad. It might be weird for her.”

  With a nod, Steed grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me in for a quick peck on the lips. “Come on. Let’s head back to my place.”

  “What about all of this?” I asked as I stood and Steed carefully picked up Chloe without waking her.

  “Trevor will get it. Trust me, he got paid hefty for helping me with all of this. Besides, he’s working at the bar tonight. If I know Trevor, he’ll bring a girl back here and fuck her.”

  I snarled. “Nice.”

  Steed chuckled and shrugged the best he could while carrying Chloe to his truck. “Just keeping it real.”

  “Uh-huh. Well, I was perfectly fine not knowing that bit of information.”

  After slipping Chloe into the back seat, Steed quietly shut the door and grabbed me. His hands were all over me. In my hair, caressing my breasts and finally under my shirt. “God it’s been so fucking hard to keep my hands off you. I want to bury myself inside of you and stay there all night.”

  My chest heaved as I fought to get air. His words sent heat immediately to my throbbing center. No matter how many times we were together, the need for more was always there.

  “I think that sounds like a plan,” I breathed back.

  After Steed had put Chloe to bed, he grabbed my hand and dragged me downstairs to the master bedroom. We shed our clothes like it had been weeks since we were together. The desire was thick in the room, and I wondered how long sex with Steed would be like this. Would we ever get tired of each other? Would the need to have him inside me lessen over time?

  His lips were all over me. My mouth, neck, nipples, stomach, inside of my thigh. I dug my fingers into his hair and pulled him close to the pulsing ache between my legs.

  “Ohmygawd…Steed. I want you.”

  And before I knew it, Steed’s mouth was over my hot center, and I was covering my mouth to bury my cries of passion.

  A sweet darkness swept over me as I floated on a cloud of utter bliss. I barely felt him moving over me. The sound of a condom ripping open brought me back down to earth. I was still reeling from my orgasm when Steed pushed inside of me. His slow lovemaking from earlier was gone. He was desperate for me, and I loved every second of it.

  “That’s it baby. Fuuck. That feels so good.”

  My hips met his thrust for thrust. The buildup of another orgasm was right at the edge.

  “Goddamn it, Paxton. Baby, I need you to come.”

  Just as my release let loose, so did Steed’s. His mouth clamped over mine, taking in my moans of pleasure.

  Then the knock on the door had us both stilling.

  Shit. I prayed like hell he had locked the door.

  Steed pulled out of me and ripped the condom off so fast it was unreal. I rolled over and off the bed, hitting the floor with a small thump.

  “You can…Pax? Where did you go?”

  “Down here!” I whispered.

  Steed walked around the bed and looked down at me. “What in the fuck are you doing on the floor?”

  “Daddy?”

  The door to his bedroom opened, and Steed grabbed the sheet and wrapped it around him.

  “Hey, pumpkin. What’s…um… What’s…ah.”

  I covered my mouth with my hand to keep from laughing. Steed was totally flustered.

  “Why do you have your sheet wrapped around you, Daddy?”

  “I um… I couldn’t find my sleeping pants, baby. What’s going on? Why are you out of bed?”

  The bed moved, and I pictured Chloe crawling up on it. “I can’t sleep. Daddy, we need to talk.”

  My heart dropped. That sounded serious…and cute as well.

  “Um, okay, pumpkin. Want to go to your room and talk?”

  “No. This is okay here.”

  I smiled and dropped my head. I was so going to be busted. And I was completely naked.

  Shit!

  The bed dropped more as Steed sat down.

  NO! I need clothes. A blanket. I need out of this room!

  “You sure you don’t want to go back up to your room?”

  “I’m sure.”

  I sighed internally.

  “What’s on your mind, pumpkin?”

  “Paxton.”

  I froze and my breath stilled.

  Oh. No. She hates me!

  “What about Paxton?”

  “Daddy, I really want her to be my mommy. Why can’t you marry her?”

  A huge smile moved across my face. I spied one of Steed’s T-shirts. Reaching for it, I carefully slipped it on.

  “I can marry her.”

  “Well, why don’t you?”

  I covered my mouth with my hand. Oh, how I love this little girl. I could see it in her eyes how much she longed for a mother. Amelia told me how Chloe talked about me and asked a million and one questions each time.

  “It’s not that simple, baby.”

  “How come? Don’t you love her?”

  “I love her very much. But when the time comes for me to ask her, I want to make it special. And that means planning.”

  She giggled. “Like how you planned her special day today?”

  “Yes! Exactly like that.”

  Steed’s bed was tall enough for me to sit up without my head showing. Pulling my knees to my chest, I tried to still my racing heart.

  “Daddy?”

  “Yes, pumpkin?”

  “Will Paxton want to give me a baby brother or sister?”

  Tears streamed down my face. It was in that moment that it all made sense. Everything that happened ten years ago…right up until this mome
nt. This little girl was meant to be in our world. She was destined to be in my world and even though she wasn’t my child, I would love her like she was.

  “I know she will want to.”

  “Will she love her baby more than me?”

  Burying my hands in my face, I silently sobbed. It took everything not to jump up and pull her into my arms. I wanted to reassure her I would always love her no matter how many kids Steed and I had together.

  “Oh, Chloe, no. She would love you both equally.”

  “But…but I’m not really her baby.”

  My face was soaked with tears as I dropped my head back against the bed.

  “That doesn’t matter, Chloe. Paxton loves you so much, and I know there is nothing more that she wants than to have you as a daughter. Just because you didn’t grow in her belly doesn’t mean that she won’t love you like I do. She wants to be your mommy as much as you want her to be.”

  A silence lingered, and I held my breath.

  “I can’t wait to call her mommy. She’s the prettiest girl in town, Daddy.”

  Steed laughed. “I know she is. And she’s mine.”

  Chloe laughed. “Silly, Daddy. She’s ours.”

  And there it was. I slowly fell to my side and laid in a fetal position, happiness swirling around me as I tried to hold back sobs. I couldn’t believe a few months back my heart had a black void in it. Now…now it was overflowing with so much love and happiness I was completely overwhelmed.

  “That’s right, Chloe. She’s ours. Now let’s get you up to bed.”

  Five minutes later Steed walked back into his bedroom. I was sitting on his bed with my knees pulled to my chest, sobbing like an idiot.

  Fear hit Steed’s face as he rushed to me. “Christ. Please tell me those are happy tears.”

  I nodded. “V-very…h-happy…t-t-tears!”

  He laughed and pulled me up in front of him. His thumbs attempted to wipe away my endless tears.

  The way his blue eyes searched my face before he chuckled and those dimples peeked out from his unshaven face caused my knees to go weak.

  Reaching into his pocket, Steed pulled out a small little band. “Chloe thought the reason I wasn’t asking you to marry me was because I didn’t have a ring.”