Untamed
Sometimes you must figure out when enough is enough. I’m tired of worrying about my mother. I’m tired of being a prisoner. All I want right now is to see my mother’s face one last time. I just want everything to be the way I attended it to be.
Is that too much to ask? I just want a simple, normal, life like everyone else my age.
“Where are you going?” Someone says to me while I speed-walk down the road.
I look to my right and see Daniel driving sluggishly next to me in his black Charger.
“I’m going home,” I inform him.
“And then what?” he asks.
“And then…and then I’ll figure out the rest when I get there.”
The car stops to a rough halt as I continue my way down this long, lonesome, road. I hear the door of the car closing behind me. I know he’s going to try and stop me, but my mind is already made up. I'm going back home, where I belong.
“Hey wait,” he pulls on my shoulder, turning me around to face him.
“Seriously, you’re going to get yourself killed,” he warns me with his strict eyes.
“I made my choice. This is my decision. I’m going home to my mom. I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t ask for any of this. I just want a safe, normal, life. Please let me go. It’s not your choice to make.”
He lets go off me with a slight hesitation. I then turn and continue with my walk. My words seemed to stop him from pursuing me because I don’t hear his heavy boots strolling behind me anymore.
“If normal is what you’re looking for, you will never find it,” he says at a high volume. “Is that how you want to live the rest of your life? Going after something that doesn't exist?”
I continue walking and try my best to act as if no one is speaking.
“Can you just listen….please?!”
I try to fight the urge to stop but his plea manages to convince me otherwise. I rotate and give him my undivided attention. Slowly, he approaches me with his trademark scowl.
“Normal is not down this road, Iva. It's not at home or at any school. You will look and look until eventually you become frustrated with yourself.”
Through his stern eyes, I see regret forming as he continues to lecture me.
“In the end, you realize there’s no such thing. You are strange Iva. And so am I. You will drive yourself crazy trying to figure out why. Then you’ll become angry. And then you will begin to take that anger out on others. If you really want to leave, fine. But I’m going to be real, there is no fucking fairytale ending down that road. There is no fucking happily ever after. Your dad is never coming back and this whole situation won’t just disappear. Why? That’s because fairytales belongs in books.”
Daniel stops a foot away from me. I hate it when this happens, when someone tells you the unwanted truth. I begin to sob by his statement because I’ve been searching my entire life for normality. So many years I’ve wasted trying to find it.
“But…that’s all I ever wanted. Why can’t I just live a normal life?” I cry out with tears pouring down my face like a baby. “That’s all I wanted.”
“That’s because it’s not real. Do you see? Everyone is strange, but like us, some are just a little stranger than others.”
He comes close to me and places his hands on my shoulders.
“You’re not normal, nor will you ever be. And that’s a marvelous thing. You are extraordinary. Don’t ever try to settle for the norm, or else you will sell yourself short. And you’re worth way more than that. Understand?”
I nod in agreement as the tears rolls down my cheeks. Then he pulls me into a hug. A hug I really needed from someone…