Hold on Tight

  “I love you, Micah,” I told him.

  “I love you more, Momma.”

  Not getting enough sleep last night was weighing on me. I was exhausted, and I had three blisters on my feet, which wasn’t helping. It was getting harder to cover up my yawns. Hillary had caught me yawning twice already. I knew she didn’t like me looking like I had partied hard all night. If she only knew the truth. I would explain about my car so she would at least know the reason I was obviously tired. I didn’t want her thinking this was from a night of partying.

  “You got a customer, Sienna,” Gretchen called out. I turned around to see Cam Dodge dressed in his dress shirt and tie. I hadn’t expected to see him again, much less coming in for a haircut.

  “Okay, I’m free for the next hour,” I said, and smiled at Cam.

  His grin looked somewhat apologetic. I don’t know why. He had nothing to be sorry over. We had gone out once. No big deal that it had been almost two weeks ago.

  “I need a trim,” he said, walking toward me. I motioned for him to take a seat in my chair, and then I put a cape over him and fastened it around his neck.

  “Your current hairdresser unavailable?” I asked.

  He gave me that crooked grin that made him cute. “I normally go to the barber shop. You’re easier on the eyes than Bill.”

  Smiling, I reached for a comb and checked out his hair. “You want a wash and style too, or just a trim?”

  “Are you the one who will wash it?” he asked, looking at me in the mirror.

  “Yes,” I replied.

  “Then yeah, wash me up. I’m filthy.”

  This time I laughed. I doubted Cam had ever been filthy. He was always so clean and put together that he reminded me of a politician.

  “Okay. Let’s get you clean first, then,” I told him, and led him back to the sinks.

  I normally didn’t think anything of washing men’s hair, but the fact that Cam wanted me to wash it made me a little self-conscious. I made sure I had the water at a comfortable temperature for him, then tried really hard to focus on washing his hair and not thinking about the fact that he could probably see down my shirt when I leaned. Most guys closed their eyes when you washed their hair, but Cam’s eyes were open.

  “You smell really good,” he said, making me even more nervous. I didn’t like being flirted with when I did hair.

  “Thanks,” I replied. I quickly finished washing him and got the towel around his head, then led him back to his seat.

  When he was back in my chair, his eyes met mine in the mirror. “What are you doing tomorrow night?” he asked.

  I was doing nothing. Well, that wasn’t true. I was probably watching one of the Star Wars movies with my son. “Not sure.”

  He nodded and looked let down. “Is my not calling going to be held against me?”

  No. Not really. I didn’t blame him for not calling. I wouldn’t have called me either after that craziness.

  “No,” I assured him as I began combing his hair.

  “So if I asked you out for tomorrow night . . . ?”

  “I would have to speak with my son first. Then I’d need to talk to his grandparents,” I told him.

  He nodded. “Fair enough. When you do that, let me know. I’d like another chance. One where we don’t run into your son’s uncle.”

  Cam was a nice guy. He was attractive. But he wasn’t Dewayne. No one would ever be Dewayne. But I needed the guys I dated to at least make me forget Dewayne. Cam never would. I’d always be missing Dewayne’s tattoos and piercings and dreadlocks.

  “I think that I’m a waste of your time, Cam. I have baggage, and I’m not emotionally ready to date.”

  There, I had been honest. Cam frowned, then let out a sigh. “Fair enough. I figured there was more between you and Dewayne Falco than just your son.”

  I couldn’t even argue with him.

  I finished cutting his hair, and we talked about the weather, what could possibly be wrong with my car, and the high school cafeteria food. Then he paid me, tipped me way too much, and left.

  I might have made a mistake turning him away, but I didn’t ever want to hurt someone. I knew how that felt, and there was no point in him wasting his time with me. I was a mess.

  Six years ago . . .

  DEWAYNE

  Preston pulled up outside a house surrounded by cars, with loud music pumping out of the speakers. There were empty beer cans in the yard and even more red Solo cups. A bunch of guys were doing shots off some chick’s stomach on the front porch.

  “You sure you want to do this? We partied too when we were in school. Ain’t like Dustin is doing anything we didn’t do,” Preston said, looking around at the high school party with illegal drinking going on. Whoever lived here must have been left home alone by really stupid parents.

  “This shit ain’t Dustin. He has college scouts looking at him. He has a life we can’t imagine waiting on him. He shouldn’t be here, and he sure as hell shouldn’t have Sienna here with him. This isn’t safe.”

  Preston chuckled. “Shit always comes back to Sienna,” he said, but I ignored him as we walked up the sidewalk.

  A couple of the guys on the basketball team recognized me and called out to me. They were all smashed. I ignored them. They were making a mistake. This wasn’t going to get them anywhere but fucking prison.

  I wouldn’t let that happen to my brother.

  “Where’s Dustin?” I asked one of them.

  “He’s got Kimmy up in a bedroom, more than likely,” someone called out.

  Kimmy? Kimmy the blond cheerleader Kimmy? Oh, fuck no, he wasn’t that stupid. She’d slept with Preston our senior year. She’d slept with a lot of my graduating class.

  I headed inside and straight up the stairs. Preston was behind me. “He’s a kid. We sure as hell weren’t relationship material when we were his age. We fucked anything that was hot and had a pussy. You can’t blame him for not being satisfied—”

  I turned and got in Preston’s face, shutting him up. “Don’t. Sienna is different. We never had a Sienna. So don’t fucking compare that shit. He’s fucking up his life.”

  Preston threw his hands in the air and backed up. “Fine. Go knock some sense into him. Not me. Him. I like my face all nice and pretty.”

  Preston was hard to get mad at. I turned back around and headed for the first door, opening it and finding some random girl’s tits, and her mouth wrapped around a guy’s dick.

  Next room. I swung open the door just as my brother’s name was being screamed by a girl who was not Sienna. Fucking idiot!

  “You little dipshit! What the fuck are you doing?” I roared. The girl squealed, and all Dustin did was look back at me and grin. He was drunk. His eyes were bloodshot, and he had a goofy look on his face.

  “I’m fucking,” he replied, and pumped his hips into the girl, who was scrambling to cover herself. “She’s been wanting my dick for two years. I started giving it to her ’cause she likes it hard and dirty.”

  More information than I needed to know.

  “Dude, you so need to shut up before he beats the hell out of you,” Preston said from behind me. “Little brother or not, you’re drunk and screwing someone who isn’t Sienna when you know how he is about Sienna.”

  “Did you break up with Sienna?” I asked him, trying to figure out why he would be in here with this slut when he had the world in his hands.

  Dustin frowned. “Break up with Sienna? Hell no. She’s my girl. Love her. Wouldn’t break up with her for this,” he said, nodding to the girl underneath him, who cursed at him and slapped his chest.

  “You can’t love Sienna and do this shit to her,” I told him, still trying to figure out what the hell had happened to my brother.

  “Yeah, I can. Sienna’s my baby. Love her. You just gotta be easy with her. She can’t take it hard. Kimmy lets me fuck her in the janitor’s closet at school, and she even sucks my dick in the locker room before a game.”

  Shit. Dustin had
lost his mind. “Get dressed. We’re leaving. Now.”

  Dustin stood up. His dick was still hard, and I saw then that he didn’t have a condom on. Motherfucker!

  “Oh shit, he ain’t wrapping that thing up,” Preston said, pointing out the obvious.

  “You selfish asshole! You’re cheating on Sienna and you’re not protecting her? What the hell is wrong with you?”

  Dustin looked down at his dick and groaned. “Shit. I forgot. I was drinking and she was stroking me outside, and then I was up here and inside her. Forgot about the condom.”

  “You gotta tell Sienna. She needs to go get checked. Get dressed. I’m taking you home.”

  Dustin’s eyes went wide. “I ain’t telling Sienna this shit! She’ll break up with me. She won’t forgive me, and I need her. She’s my girl. Always been my girl. Besides, she’s got the best damn titties of any girls I’ve had.”

  I took a step toward him, needing to slam my fist into his face, when Preston jumped in front of me and pushed Dustin back. “He’s sixteen and he’s drunk. Really damn drunk. Calm down. You can make sure Sienna gets tested. Just don’t beat the hell out of him while he’s like this. He can’t fight back.”

  “No. Can’t tell Sienna. Love her. She’s my girl. Love her. You can’t make her leave me. She’s my one and only. You know. You love her too. We both love her. The Falco boys love Sienna Roy. And her pretty titties. Fucking perfect titties.”

  “Can y’all leave so I can get dressed?” Kimmy asked in an angry screech. “I’m sick of hearing about his love for Sienna and her damn titties. It’s me who’s pregnant with his baby. Not her. Me. Me who he fucks whenever he needs to get off. Not her. He treats her like a porcelain doll. She’s not gonna be his baby momma. I am.”

  Present day . . .

  SIENNA

  Dewayne had actually shown up instead of texting me to take Micah to his parents’ on Saturday morning. Then he’d driven me to work, with Micah sitting between us in the truck, excited about going to get breakfast with Dewayne after they dropped me off.

  It was easy enough. Micah being there made it easy. I didn’t make eye contact with Dewayne if I didn’t have to, and I focused on Micah. That was why I was even in this truck with Dewayne: Micah. He did it all for Micah, and I understood that. He’d made sure I understood why he was doing this.

  However, when Dewayne came walking into the shop at lunchtime to pick me up, he didn’t have Micah with him.

  “Where’s Micah?” I asked as I picked up my purse.

  “My parents have him. We have to go get your car,” he replied.

  Oh. Well, that was good. I thought. I just hoped I had enough money. I still owed for the towing, too. I wasn’t sure who I owed it to and how much. I would find out once Dewayne and I got in his truck.

  “Hey, Dewayne,” Gretchen said, and wiggled her long pink fingernails at him, then winked.

  He didn’t do anything more than nod at her, and then he motioned for the door. “Ready?” he asked.

  I waved at Hillary and Gretchen, although at the moment I wasn’t in the mood to do anything but scowl at Gretchen. I wished she’d never told me about her and Dewayne. I followed him outside. He opened my door for me, and I climbed inside and buckled up.

  Dewayne got in on his side and we were on the road without a word from either of us. I hoped this wasn’t going to be a long, awkward ride.

  “Reckon you’re not gonna be happy with me, but you’re gonna have to get over it and understand that I’m doing what’s best for Micah.”

  I tensed up. This didn’t sound good.

  “I had your car towed to the junkyard where it belonged. It’s now scrap metal. Seeing as how I did that, I owe you another car. I’ll gladly replace your old one, and although you’re ready to punch me in the face right at this moment, you’re not going to because I’m driving and because you and I both know Micah needs a safe vehicle. He also needs his momma in a safe vehicle. What you were driving was as unsafe as it gets. And it was polluting the earth.”

  I just stared at him. He’d had my car turned into scarp metal. My only means of transportation. My paid-for car was now gone. “I can’t believe you did that,” I said, still in shock.

  “I want you and Micah safe.”

  We were safe. Well, maybe the car breaking down at night hadn’t been safe, but otherwise that car had worked just fine. “I can’t just let you buy me a car,” I said, my voice raising a notch from the panic. “I can’t . . . That isn’t something someone else buys you. It’s my job to supply a car for me and my son. Not yours.”

  Dewayne pulled into the Chevrolet car dealership. He was really doing this. I wasn’t going to let him. I couldn’t.

  “I’m buying my nephew a safe vehicle. You can’t stop me. I can buy his mother something to safely carry him around in. Someone needs to take care of you, both of you. I’m the uncle. It’s my job.”

  I fisted up my hands and hit my thighs in frustration. “No, it isn’t!”

  “Yeah, Little Red, it is. Now, I did some research on good family SUVs, and the Tahoe ranked really well. It’s safe, and they have one here that’s two years old and in great condition. I want you to come see what you think. If you like it, then it’s yours. If you don’t, then we will go to car lots all damn day until you find something you love.”

  “You can’t afford this,” I argued.

  He cocked his head to the side. “Yeah, babe, I can. Now get your ass out of my truck and go look at that Tahoe. They’re bringing it around now.”

  Okay. Fine. I would look at it. But he was not buying it for me. For Micah. This was ridiculous.

  * * *

  An hour later I drove my new Chevy Tahoe off the lot and was completely in love. It had everything. Even a sunroof. The radio worked and it had seat warmers. Micah was going to be giddy with excitement over the television that flipped down from the ceiling.

  When I had finally given in and admitted to loving the Tahoe, Dewayne had grinned like a little boy on Christmas morning. He had been happy about it. How he was happy about dropping this kind of money on someone made no sense. I was stressing out over the price, but Dewayne assured me that he had the money and could pay cash. That he wanted to do this.

  The title would be sent to me with my name on it in a few weeks. I owned this Tahoe. I could drive it for at least the next ten years. The relief made me want to weep. I owned a house and a safe, dependable car now. It made me feel humbled. I had never expected this. Ever.

  I glanced in my rearview mirror and watched as Dewayne turned left at the red light, headed to wherever he lived. I had never seen his place. I doubted I ever would unless Micah went there to visit him.

  The idea made me sad. I wanted to know what Dewayne’s house looked like. I wanted to see his world. His life. But I wasn’t ever going to get that privilege. He had made sure I understood that.

  I pulled into my driveway, and the front door flew open as Micah came running out with a huge grin on his face. Tabby stood in my doorway, beaming. Dewayne must have called her.

  I opened the door, and Micah jumped up in my arms. “Dewayne bought us this? For real? It’s awesome!”

  I nodded and blinked away the tears in my eyes. It was awesome.

  “It even has a television,” I told him, letting him crawl inside to inspect it.

  Tabby walked up, wiping her tears and grinning. “He’s a good man. He just doesn’t realize it. He doubts himself, but my boy is as good as they come. Always has had a heart of gold. Just need him to wake up and see that.”

  “This is too much. I can’t believe he bought this. I’m in awe, and I feel guilty for letting him,” I admitted.

  She laughed. “Girl, you didn’t have a choice. Once Dewayne decides he wants to do something, then you’re sunk. He’s gonna do it. And he wanted you and Micah to have a safe vehicle. Besides, if he saw how much fun Micah was having checking it out, he might go buy him another one.”

  She was right. Dewayne was a goo
d man. Much better than he let himself believe. Was it possible that he needed someone to show him that he was special? Was that it? No woman had ever tried to make him see how wonderful he was inside. Could I?

  DEWAYNE

  I had finished loading my dishwasher and was headed to the shower when a knock on the door stopped me. I turned and went to open it. Sienna stood there holding a cake box and wore a nervous smile. I was not expecting to see her at my door.

  “Hey. Uh, Micah and I made you something. He loved the Tahoe. I had to force him to get out of it. He wanted to stay in it and watch a movie tonight.”

  That made me smile. We would have to take a road trip in it soon so he could watch his movie. “I’m glad he approves,” I said, then stepped back to let her inside.

  She looked around, and I could see the surprise on her face that it was clean. I didn’t do well with messy shit. I liked my stuff put away. It was one reason I didn’t do roommates. I’d tried that once and almost threw Preston’s crap out the window and into the parking lot one day, I’d gotten so sick of it.

  “Your mom told Micah you like chocolate. So we made you a chocolate cake. The icing was Micah’s job, so it’s creative,” she said.

  I took the box from her hands and nodded toward the kitchen. “Come on,” I told her.