Chicot the Jester

  CHAPTER XXVIII.

  HOW BROTHER GORENFLOT TRAVELED UPON AN ASS, NAMED PANURGE, ANDLEARNED MANY THINGS HE DID NOT KNOW BEFORE.

  What made Chicot so indifferent to his own repast was, that hehad already breakfasted plentifully. Therefore, he sat Gorenflotdown to eggs and bacon, while he went among the peasants to lookfor an ass. He found a pacific creature, four years old, andsomething between an ass and a horse; gave twenty-two livresfor it, and brought it to Gorenflot, who was enchanted at thesight of it, and christened it Panurge. Chicot, seeing by thelook of the table that there would be no cruelty in staying hiscompanion's repast, said,--

  "Come, now we must go on; at Melun we will lunch."

  Gorenflot got up, merely saying, "At Melun, at Melun."

  They went on for about four leagues, then Gorenflot lay down onthe grass to sleep, while Chicot began to calculate.

  "One hundred and twenty leagues, at ten leagues a day, wouldtake twelve days." It was as much as he could reasonably expectfrom the combined forces of a monk and an ass. But Chicot shookhis head. "It will not do," he said, "if he wants to follow me,he must do fifteen."

  He pushed the monk to wake him, who, opening his eyes, said, "Arewe at Melun? I am hungry."

  "Not yet, compere, and that is why I woke you; we must get on;we go too slow, ventre de biche!"

  "Oh, no, dear M. Chicot; it is so fatiguing to go fast. Besides,there is no hurry: am I not traveling for the propagation ofthe faith, and you for pleasure? Well, the slower we go, thebetter the faith will be propagated, and the more you will amuseyourself. My advice is to stay some days at Melun, where theymake excellent eel-pies. What do you say, M. Chicot?"

  "I say, that my opinion is to go as fast as possible; not tolunch at Melun, but only to sup at Monterau, to make up for losttime."

  Gorenflot looked at his companion as if he did not understand.

  "Come, let us get on," said Chicot.

  The monk sat still and groaned.

  "If you wish to stay behind and travel at your ease, you arewelcome."

  "No, no!" cried Gorenflot, in terror; "no, no, M. Chicot; I loveyou too much to leave you!"

  "Then to your saddle at once."

  Gorenflot got on his ass this time sideways, as a lady sits,saying it was more comfortable; but the fact was that, fearingthey were to go faster, he wished to be able to hold on bothby mane and tail.

  Chicot began to trot, and the ass followed. The first momentswere terrible for Gorenflot, but he managed to keep his seat.From time to time Chicot stood up in his stirrups and lookedforward, then, not seeing what he looked for, redoubled his speed.

  "What are you looking for, dear M. Chicot?"

  "Nothing; but we are not getting on."

  "Not getting on! we are trotting all the way."

  "Gallop then!" and he began to canter.

  Panurge again followed; Gorenflot was in agonies.

  "Oh, M. Chicot!" said he, as soon as he could speak, "do youcall this traveling for pleasure? It does not amuse me at all."

  "On! on!"

  "It is dreadful!"

  "Stay behind then!"

  "Panurge can do no more; he is stopping."

  "Then adieu, compere!"

  Gorenflot felt half inclined to reply in the same manner, but heremembered that the horse, whom he felt ready to curse, bore onhis back a man with a hundred and fifty pistoles in his pocket,so he resigned himself, and beat his ass to make him gallop oncemore.

  "I shall kill my poor Panurge!" cried he dolefully, thinking tomove Chicot.

  "Well, kill him," said Chicot quietly, "and we will buy another."

  All at once Chicot, on arriving at the top of a hill, reinedin his horse suddenly. But the ass, having once taken it intohis head to gallop, was not so easily stopped, and Gorenflotwas forced to let himself slide off and hang on to the donkeywith all his weight before he could stop him.

  "Ah, M. Chicot!" cried he, "what does it all mean? First we mustgallop fit to break our necks, and then we must stop short here!"

  Chicot had hidden himself behind a rock, and was eagerly watchingthree men who, about two hundred yards in advance, were travelingon quietly on their mules, and he did not reply.

  "I am tired and hungry!" continued Gorenflot angrily.

  "And so am I," said Chicot; "and at the first hotel we come towe will order a couple of fricasseed chickens, some ham, anda jug of their best wine."

  "Really, is it true this time?"

  "I promise you, compere."

  "Well, then, let us go and seek it. Come, Panurge, you shall havesome dinner."

  Chicot remounted his horse, and Gorenflot led his ass. Themuch-desired inn soon appeared, but, to the surprise of Gorenflot,Chicot caused him to make a detour and pass round the back. Atthe front door were standing the three travelers.