The One and Only

  Mum emerged from the kitchen in tears. She looked up and saw me.

  ‘Oh, Luke, I’m sorry you had to hear that.’ She tried to smile. ‘I don’t know why he gets so angry.’

  I walked back downstairs, my head pulsing with fury.

  Stupid bastard. How dare he upset her like that.

  I put my arms round Mum and hugged her. She hugged me back, then wiped her eyes.

  ‘He’s just got so impatient with me recently. All I’m trying to do is help him prepare for . . . for the baby coming. But he acts as if me getting pregnant has somehow made me a completely different person.’ She sighed. ‘D’you think I’ve changed, Luke?’

  I shrugged, feeling awkward. I hate it when Mum wants to talk about stuff like that. In fact, she had changed massively in the past few months. For a start it took her ages to do anything or walk anywhere. And she looked completely different too. All fat-faced. Fat everywhere, really. I knew it was just the baby – but it was weird seeing it.

  ‘A bit, maybe. I dunno, Mum.’ I turned back to the stairs, wondering how many more middle-aged women in tears I was going to have to deal with tonight. Immediately I felt guilty.

  I turned back. ‘You OK, Mum?’

  I desperately wanted her to say yes, that she was fine. I glanced up the stairs towards my room – where I could close the door and shut out everything else . . . where I could play music and think about Eve.

  ‘Course I’m OK.’ She smiled. ‘I just miss your dad.’

  We looked at each other.

  ‘Me too,’ I said.

  I did miss him. Especially now, without Eve.

  ‘I’m going to call Trisha,’ Mum said. ‘See if she can come round.’

  I breathed a sigh of relief. ‘Good idea.’

  Trisha was Mum’s friend. Her best friend really. They hadn’t known each other that long. Mum had met her at some ante-natal clinic. Trisha was pregnant too. She was divorced, with a three-year-old daughter. She and Mum really hit it off. They were always getting together, giggling over, like, one glass of wine, telling themselves how naughty they were to be drinking at all.

  I liked Trisha. She treated me like a grown-up, which was more than any of Mum’s other friends ever had. Mum had fallen out with most of them when she started seeing Matt. They all said it was too soon after Dad died. Then when she got pregnant it was the final straw. I overheard a couple of them talking once, saying Mum was like a teenager – really irresponsible.

  That pissed me off. Why does everyone think teenagers are automatically irresponsible? I mean, it wasn’t like I’d got my girlfriend pregnant.

  Yeah right, Luke. Get real. You weren’t even having sex.

  I gritted my teeth and carried on walking up the stairs.

  Several weeks passed. The weather got colder. Mum got fatter. Matt came round less and less. And Ryan kept nagging me to call Hayley.

  ‘Eve’s going to be away for a whole year,’ he kept saying. ‘You can’t live like a frigging monk.’

  Even Chloe joined in.

  ‘I think you’re being a bit of an idiot,’ she said. ‘Even if Eve still wants to go out with you when she’s back, I’m sure she’d understand you going on a date. I mean, she wouldn’t expect you to stay in all the time.’

  I shrugged. I’d been round to see Eve’s mum a couple of times since Bonfire Night. She’d said Eve had sounded happier since she’d decided to accept staying on for the whole year. She also said Eve kept insisting I should forget her. Get on with my life.

  There was no way I could know if she was telling the truth. No way I could know what Eve really felt.

  It was horrible.

  Then, at the beginning of the final week of term, in the middle of a freezing cold, dark December, Chloe dropped a bombshell that put Eve out of my head for almost an entire evening.

  ‘I’m moving out,’ she said.

  We were eating tea together. It was one of the few occasions Mum had managed to get the three of us to sit round the table this year. Usually Chloe just came and went as she pleased. So I’d been surprised when she’d joined us. Now I saw why.

  ‘What are you talking about?’ Mum snapped.

  I chewed slowly on a mouthful of lasagne.

  ‘I’ve got a job,’ Chloe said nonchalantly. ‘In a shop in town. Starts on Sunday. So I’m leaving school. And I’m moving into this house-share in South London. It’s this girl’s parents’ house. They own lots of places – rent them out. But because it’s her, the rent’s dead cheap.’

  Mum’s mouth dropped open. ‘What about school? You can’t just leave home like this. It’s—’

  ‘Perfectly legal,’ Chloe smirked. ‘I’m seventeen. I can do what I like.’

  ‘No you can’t.’ Mum thumped the table. Her face was bright red. ‘Chloe, this is so typical. You cannot just—’

  ‘Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do!’ Chloe shouted.

  I stood up and took my plate up to my room.

  I could hear their voices all the way up the stairs and through the walls and door of my bedroom. I sat down on the bed. There was no point Mum yelling like that. I knew from experience that Chloe was going to do whatever she wanted. Nothing and no one would stop her. Well. Maybe one person might.

  A few minutes later I heard Chloe stomp up the stairs. I darted out onto the landing and caught her as she was going into her room.

  ‘Does Ryan know?’

  ‘Of course.’ Chloe tried to shut her door. I pushed my foot against it, forcing it open.

  Chloe swore at me.

  ‘Doesn’t he mind?’ I said. ‘If you’re on the other side of London you won’t see each other so much.’

  I’d mind, if it was us, Eve. I’d mind.

  ‘Piss off, Luke. No, he doesn’t mind. He thinks it’ll be great for me.’

  I stared at her. Then I moved my foot out of the way and she slammed the door shut in my face.

  I talked to Ryan about it the next day at school. He was as relaxed about the idea of Chloe moving away as she had been.

  ‘It makes sense, Luke. She hates school. And you know your mum does her head in. Anyway, we’ll still see each other at weekends.’

  I didn’t understand them. How could they not mind the idea of being more apart? Mum wasn’t bothered about that, of course. She just kept going on about Chloe throwing away her education.

  ‘She should be going to university, Luke,’ she kept saying. ‘She’s so bright. She got great GCSE grades. She’s just wasting her talents.’

  But Mum might as well have saved her breath. Chloe had everything planned and nothing was going to stand in her way. She decided to move out the day after term ended – a Saturday. She and Ryan and loads of our friends were going out to this new club in town the night before.

  ‘You gotta come, Luke,’ Ryan told me. ‘It’s a new place. It’ll be a whole new experience.’

  And it was. Though not exactly in the way Ryan meant.

  3

  Hayley

  Our fake ID worked like a charm. The club was heaving. The music was great. The atmosphere was buzzing. Everyone was in a good mood. Even I was enjoying myself.

  I was standing at the bar, watching Chloe and some of her friends dancing in their sexy club gear. They were taking the piss out of the group of girls next to them . . . copying their moves. The other girls hadn’t even noticed. I laughed as Chloe waved her arms above her head and made a silly face.

  Despite her moods and the way she was always arguing with Mum, I was going to miss her. Ryan wandered over and stood beside me, watching them too.

  ‘Are you really cool with her going?’ I shouted over the music.

  Ryan smiled into his beer. ‘Course I am. It’s what she’s gotta do. Anyway, we’ve talked about it. We decided it was the right time to take a break anyway.’

  ‘Take a break?’ I stared at him. How could he sound so laid back? ‘You mean split up?’

  ‘Not exactly. More like just saying we could see oth
er people too.’

  ‘See other people?’ I said.

  Ryan grinned. ‘Is there an echo in here? Look, Luke, I know you’re all heavy about Eve and stuff, but it’s not like that for everyone. Chloe and I’ve decided. We’re both too special not to share round a bit.’

  His grin deepened.

  I shrugged and turned back to watch Chloe and her friends.

  Whatever, Ryan. Whatever works for you.

  A few moments later a high-pitched, girly squeal sounded over the top of the music. I turned to see Ryan flinging his arms round a girl with a mass of red, curly hair. The bonfire girl. In high heels and an extremely tight dress.

  ‘Hayley, you made it,’ Ryan shouted.

  Hayley disentangled herself, checking the little glittery clips in her hair were still in place. She smiled shyly across at me. ‘Hi,’ she said.

  ‘Hi.’ I glanced at Ryan.

  ‘Luke begged me to invite you,’ Ryan grinned.

  I frowned. Jesus, Ry. ‘Er . . .’

  Ryan whacked me on the arm. ‘Ooops. Sorry, man.’ He winked at Hayley. ‘Guess I’ll leave you two alone together.’

  He sloped off towards the girls on the dance floor.

  Thanks a million, Ryan.

  Hayley smiled again. ‘D’you want a drink?’ she said.

  ‘Cool. Thanks.’ I watched her lean against the bar, trying to attract the barman’s attention.

  It didn’t take long.

  Ryan had been right about the hot body. Hayley’s dress was so tight I could see every curve as I followed her outline all the way down. God. She had the fittest bum . . . And she was buying me a beer!

  I decided to talk to her.

  ‘So how d’you meet Ry?’ I shouted over the music.

  Hayley handed me a bottle of beer. ‘At the cinema. I was with some friends and he just came over and started talking to me.’ She grinned at me, her cheeks dimpling. ‘You know what he’s like.’

  I nodded. Ryan. The world’s most successful flirt.

  ‘So you went out?’ I said.

  Hayley sipped her beer. ‘Yeah. Only a couple of times, though. One of those times was your party. But I didn’t see him after that. We . . . it wasn’t a big deal. You know?’ She stared up at me meaningfully.

  ‘Whatever,’ I said hurriedly. God. The last thing I wanted her to think was that I was interested.

  Why not be interested? said a small voice in my head. Eve doesn’t want you any more. I took a swig of beer. ‘This is a good place, isn’t it?’

  Hayley nodded. ‘Yeah. Though I went to this really flash club last week which was better. Cost a fortune to get into.’

  I didn’t know what to say to that. I tried to think back to the Six Steps Ryan had told me about.

  Six Steps to get you any girl.

  I sighed. Who cared about steps to a girl. I’d had a girl. The perfect girl.

  What are you doing now, Eve? Are you thinking about me?

  ‘I can’t stay long here, though.’ Hayley’s voice brought me back to the noisy room.

  ‘What?’ I shouted.

  ‘I’ve got to check on the fish in my sister’s flat,’ Hayley explained.

  What was she talking about?

  There was a long pause.

  Then Hayley spoke again. ‘I think I’ll go and dance.’ She looked at me expectantly. The words ‘me too’ stalled in my throat, like a crap car.

  I watched her high-heel her way onto the dance floor, then I turned round and slumped against the bar. Why was I so rubbish with girls?

  It was easy with you, Eve. Why aren’t you here?

  I stared down at my beer. The music thudded in my head. I’d never felt lonelier in my life.

  Ryan materialised at my elbow. ‘What’s the matter?’ he said. ‘You’re not blowing Hayley out are you?’

  I ran my hand through my hair. ‘I just can’t talk to her,’ I said. ‘I don’t know what to say.’

  Ryan rolled his eyes. ‘Believe me,’ he said. ‘You don’t need to say much. I guarantee she’s not interested in your conversation.’

  I stared at him.

  ‘I told you already,’ Ryan said, exasperated. ‘She likes talking. She likes you. Just listen. Then go for it.’

  He vanished, dragged onto the dance floor by one of Chloe’s friends.

  I wandered round the club for a while. Everyone else seemed to be having a great time, but all the fun had evaporated for me. I hated myself for feeling so crap.

  Snap out of it, Luke. You’re being stupid.

  Maybe I should try talking to Hayley again. I looked round for her. And suddenly, as if by magic, she was there, right beside me.

  ‘Hi.’ I smiled. ‘I was looking for you. I owe you a beer.’

  Her eyes sparkled up at me. ‘I have to go,’ she said.

  ‘Oh,’ I said. ‘Oh . . . OK.’

  Hayley hesitated a second. ‘D’you want to come with me?’

  ‘What?’ I said. ‘To the fish-care flat?’

  She grinned. ‘Yeah. It’s not far. In fact it would be nice to go with someone. I get a bit freaked out in the dark on my own.’

  I nodded. I knew what that felt like from the night that Eve’s ex, Ben, had beaten me up. I drained my drink.

  ‘Sure,’ I said. ‘I’ll come with you.’

  The flat was about twenty minutes’ walk away.

  Hayley talked most of the way there. ‘It’s not really my sister’s flat,’ she said. ‘It’s her boyfriend’s. He’s only twenty-one but he’s loaded. He bought her this dress I’m wearing. She only wore it once then she let me have it. She does that with loads of stuff – make-up and jewellery and . . .’

  I tuned out completely. It was a cold night and our breath was misting in front of our mouths. I glanced down from time to time, snatching glimpses of Hayley’s bum and legs. She had this slightly strutting way of walking which was really sexy.

  We stopped outside a modern-looking brick apartment block. Hayley fumbled with a key and we were inside. The hall was laid with a soft grey carpet and the walls were painted pale green.

  We crossed the hall. Hayley pressed the button for the lift. After talking all the way here, she suddenly seemed self-conscious.

  ‘So what’s with these fish you’ve got to check on?’ I said.

  ‘My sister’s boyfriend keeps tropical fish,’ Hayley said. ‘Some of them are worth a fortune. When he goes away he sets up this automatic feeder thing, but he likes it being checked. That’s partly why I’ve got the keys. They’re away until tomorrow night, so . . . so I thought I should check on it . . . on the fish . . .’

  The lift door opened and we stepped inside.

  ‘You mean you’ve come round in the middle of the night just to check whether his fish-feeding system is working?’

  Hayley pressed the button for the seventh floor. She looked at the lift carpet.

  It suddenly occurred to me that the whole fish-checking scenario might have been a cover for getting me to leave the party with her.

  ‘Oh,’ I said.

  We ascended to the seventh floor in silence.

  4

  Temptation

  The flat was a total shag pad, complete with plain wooden floors, massive soft leather sofas and an enormous plasma screen TV. Windows ran all the way round two of the walls. They overlooked the river and the centre of London, all lit up with street lamps and Christmas lights.

  ‘Wow.’ I looked round. ‘Cool place.’

  Hayley took off her jacket and wandered over to an enormous fish tank in the corner. A handful of brightly-coloured fish were swimming happily through green fronds and bubbling blue water.

  The feeder system was obviously working fine.

  ‘What does your sister’s boyfriend do?’ I said, genuinely curious about how someone so young could afford a place like this.

  ‘He’s in the City,’ Hayley says. ‘Earns masses. The furniture in here cost a fortune – it’s all designer stuff. That glass table’s worth ove
r ten thousand pounds. He’s got this amazing sports car, too. I’ve been out in it. It cost him, like, seventy grand . . .’

  I tuned out again, remembering Alejandro’s Alfa Romeo Spider and the night he’d driven me out in it in Mallorca. When he’d told me that Eve loved me and still wanted to go out with me.

  Is that still what you want, Eve?

  I wandered across the room to a large modern print on the wall. Eve had a similar picture on a postcard in her bedroom.

  Something constricted in my chest.

  I wish you could see this. You’d love it.

  ‘That’s an original,’ Hayley said confidently. ‘Worth a packet.’

  It struck me that Hayley not only talked a lot – as Ryan had said – but that she was also completely obsessed with how much everything cost.

  I suddenly missed Eve unbearably. Jesus. Maybe I should just go home. Although . . .

  I turned round. Hayley was looking at me from one of the windows on the other side of the room. Her face was lit up with excitement, her eyes shining with how fantastic the flat was and how much she was enjoying showing it off to me.

  ‘It’s a great place,’ I said. ‘I’d love to live somewhere like this.’

  We stared at each other. She was undeniably hot. Not Eve hot. But her face was pretty. And she had a great body.

  Go and kiss her. She wants you to kiss her. And stop thinking about Eve.

  Hayley shrugged. ‘Maybe you will some day.’

  I wandered over to her, my heart beating fast. Hayley turned away to look out of the window. ‘It’s a great view, isn’t it?’ she said.

  I reached out and touched her cheek, turning her face back to me. I gazed into her eyes. ‘Amazing view,’ I said.

  OK. I know that was super-cheesy. A real ‘line’. But it worked. Her eyes sort of melted up at me. I leaned down and kissed her.

  I hadn’t kissed anyone since the night on the beach when I’d said goodbye to Eve. Those kisses had been sad and gentle and full of love. This was completely different. Hayley was snogging me as hard as I was snogging her, her small tongue flicking against my mouth. I reached round and ran my hands right down her back. Eve had loved it when I did that.