Requiem For Golgotha

damned bitch once and for all. Instead of lunging for her throat with the steak knife I asked, "How are you enjoying your new vocation?"

  "It's marvellous, but you know I've always enjoyed acting."

  "And being the centre of attention."

  "Absolutely."

  "Do you remember when the Aztecs were worshiping you as a Goddess?"

  "I remember the look on your face when you rode in with Cortés and found me sitting on the throne."

  "You never did tell me how you beat the Conquistadors to the New World."

  Shiva winked, "Trade secret lover."

  Over the years I have taken on so many occupations that at times I loose track. I've been drawn to banking on several occasions over the centuries, I think perhaps because of how I started in this world. In the 1930's I even turned to robbing them, rather efficiently I may add because of my particular background knowledge of the financial system. When Shiva and I crossed paths in America for the first time I was firmly entrenched in another vocation that at first glance would suit me to a tee; religion. Appearances can be deceiving however and I found out to my cost that being a Catholic priest who not only firmly believed in God and Jesus Christ but knew for a fact that they existed was not advantageous to my remaining healthy for long.

  Being attacked in the middle of the night, garrotted and dropped down a well seemed a slightly over the top way of protesting the way I preached the good word; but each to their own. It took me a week to climb out of that damned well and I gave some poor soldier a heart attack when he saw my bruised, bloody face appear over the mud crusted brickwork. I left the New World soon after that and made my way back to Europe and by 1542 I had travelled to Japan with the Portuguese expeditions.

  At times I think that the Taoist principal of Yin and Yang was specifically envisioned to describe my relationship with Shiva; Male and female, good and evil, Heaven and Earth. We are harmony, balance, two sides of the same coin; a perfect match. I loved the Far East and re-visited several times over the centuries, even after the unfortunate 1840 malaria outbreak in Kowloon that left me wishing fervently for death. Inevitably I recovered and made my way back to the Americas, first as a frontiersman and then once again as a priest.

  Despite my previous experiences and against my better judgement I do find myself drawn to religion time and again. I suppose I should know better, but deep down I actually have a faint glimmer of hope that people will accept the truth.

  "You're smiling again Jay."

  "I was thinking about the Third Great Awakening."

  "You only have yourself to blame for what happened there."

  "I know, but I had to try. They were so misguided, so mixed up in their beliefs."

  "And I warned you what would happen if you got involved, but did you listen?"

  "Why should I? You're a demon; the antithesis of every shred of hope, goodness and decency in the world."

  "Yes dear; and sometimes mother knows best."

  "When she knows anything at all!"

  "You shouldn't be so bitter about it Jay, it was two hundred years ago after all."

  "The bastards strung me up from my own steeple Shiva! You know how I feel about being hung."

  "You should have expected it though. Humans are weak and pathetic creatures at their core. They stubbornly cling to their ideals and faiths no matter how ridiculous they may seem."

  "But it wasn't right. They were so far from the truth that it hurt me to see them that way, I had to do something to make them see their error, show them the path they'd strayed so far from. I had to try."

  "People want faith, not facts."

  "So they got it wrong; again."

  "And you paid the price for their mistaken beliefs; again."

  "You do realise that 'I told you so' still sounds just as insulting no matter how you pretty it up?"

  "Of course I do dear."

  I do hate it when she's right; but then again I always have, "To err is human but to live knowing that each day could be your last…that's the face of the divine shining through."

  "Oh please stop. If you spout any more platitudes like that I may just be physically sick; which would be a shame because I'm enjoying this meal."

  "Who recommended the restaurant to you?"

  "Marshall."

  "Really? I wouldn't have thought it was his style."

  "It's not. Which is why he likes it."

  "It does explain the idiots with the cameras out front."

  "They get everywhere."

  "Have you thought about how difficult it will be to leave this life? Go back to being unknown after so many years in the public eye?"

  "I have a good twenty years left in me yet Jay darling."

  "Oh? And how will you explain away your continued good looks and youthful figure?"

  "I shan't need to. People will just choose to believe it's down to Botox, a good plastic surgeon and a healthy lifestyle. I can probably make a small fortune releasing the Siobhan Williams diet guide in a few years time."

  "That's rather cynical even for you."

  "Not really, it just shows how much I truly understand human nature. I may even dabble in politics in a year or two. Just for fun of course."

  I have little respect for politicians. Likewise my admiration for those in law enforcement is equally low; in main because of the number of times over the centuries that I've fallen on the wrong side of one law or another. I also find doctors lacking but that's due to my own disposition. I'm sure that I would have appreciated them more if I hadn't been cursed in such a way that their tender ministries would avail me little.

  "President Shiva?"

  "Of course not silly. Governor perhaps?"

  "I'd vote for you."

  "You would? That's so sweet of you."

  "Not really, I just want to see you drown in paperwork and legislation."

  "That's almost evil."

  "You must be rubbing off on me after all these years."

  "It's about time I had more of an influence on you."

  Our main course was done and over with except for the faint glow that the green peppercorn sauce had left in our mouths. Once again the plates where whisked away in an almost magical fashion and our desert arrived; melon majestic - the fragrant melon sorbet was served in a hollowed out cantaloupe shell and decorated with raspberries and tiny elegant chocolate curls. Shiva tucked into hers with a barely disguised relish but I savoured each mouthful.

  "Honestly Shiva, I think you've had almost as much influence over me in this lifetime as he had in the last."

  "Do you still miss him?"

  "Every day."

  "Why?"

  "It's like a constantly bleeding wound. It never heals, and the pain never dulls with age. I honestly don't expect you to understand."

  "I don't."

  "But you try. I think that says more about him, about what he was, what he meant to the world than a million words written in his name."

  "Because?"

  "Because a demon wants to understand."

  "Maybe I'm just doing it to mess with your head."

  "Maybe. It wouldn't be the first time."

  "Or the last."

  "Tease."

  "Always."

  "My point still stands though."

  "Enough about the past, what about the future? How long do you plan to stay in the public eye?"

  "Five years? Maybe ten, I'm honestly not sure at the moment."

  "And when the fame and fortune and adoration have lost their shine, what then?

  "I'm thinking of going home."

  "Which one?

  Shiva had a point, over the years we have both called that many different places 'home' that sometimes one blurred into another but in this instance I knew exactly where I meant, "Back to the beginning, where this all began for me, for both of us."

  "Nostalgia?"

  "Not really, I've visited several time over the years but it's been on my mind more and more of late and I think I need to go back
to lay a few ghosts to rest."

  "You have enough of those to last a lifetime."

  "Two, and you should know; most of them haunt me because of you in one way or another."

  "I think there's something almost poetic in your return to the Holy Land."

  "You would. I'm not going to go straight there though. I was thinking of heading to Europe first and retracing the route I took with the Vikingr back to the Bosporus and the old Byzantine Empire."

  "That was the 9th century. But they've been calling them Vikings for over a thousand years now."

  "I know, but I prefer their ancient Norse name."

  "There are times when you can be delightfully old fashioned Jay."

  "People magazine said that was part of my charm."

  "It is. I've enjoyed this." Shiva finished the last of her dessert with a soft sigh and a melancholy look entered her eyes for a fleeting moment; there and then gone again in an instant.

  "What is it?"

  "I was just thinking that this could be the last time we sit down across the table from each other and break bread; our very own last supper if you will."

  I almost laughed at the irony of her words, but the look on her face showed just how serious Shiva was and instead I said, "No, there will be other days, other meals. There always are with us; it's almost inevitable."

  She smiled then and the radiance of it was dazzling. We declined coffee and I paid for the meal; old fashioned as always. We left the restaurant arm in arm and for the first time in a long time I actually felt almost contented. Outside the heat and the smell of uptown LA hit us and we both handed our valet tickets to the busboy who swallowed his awe at being in the presence of two stars and fled to retrieve our cars.

  "Plans for the rest of the evening?"

  "Bed!"

  "With me?"

  "Silly moose. I have a make-up call at five in the morning."

  "Alone then."

  "Don't sound so disappointed. There