Inspiring You

  “I know,” I whisper back. “But it’s okay. It was just a note.”

  “Still, we’re going to keep an extra eye on you,” he promises. “No going out alone or anything.”

  I nod my head up and down. “That’s fine by me, but Dad? This isn’t Ayden’s fault.” I keep my voice low so no one else will hear me.

  “Of course it’s not,” my dad says, sounding shocked. “Why would you say that?”

  “Because he thinks it is.”

  We hug for a second longer then step back, forcing ourselves to relax for the sake of the others.

  My dad walks over to Ayden, who’s sitting in a chair at the table, staring at the floor, looking so sullen I want to cry for him. “You’re okay, right?” he asks Ayden.

  Ayden glances up, looking startled by my dad’s question. “Um, yeah, of course.” He looks at Aunt Lila, Uncle Ethan, and my mom who are all staring at him with concern.

  He may blame himself for all of this, but there’s nothing but love for him right now. I just hope he can see it.

  “Good. Good.” My dad yanks his fingers through his hair, making the strands go even more askew. “If you guys want, we can move the recording to a later date.”

  “No way,” I protest at the same time Aunt Lila says, “I think that’s a good idea.”

  I scrunch my nose at her. “That is so not a good idea and it’ll totally set us back for the tour.”

  She shoots me a warning look from across the kitchen. “Lyric, I don’t think the tour is the most important thing right now.”

  “It might not be, but right now everyone is so stressed out it’s starting to give me a headache,” I say, stealing a sugar cookie from the plate on the counter. “No one laughs anymore. Tells stories. Smiles. It’s all stress over this. Stress over that. And I really think everyone just needs to take a chill pill and focus on some fun stuff in life, even if it’s just for a few hours. Then you can all go back to acting twitchy and crazy.” The four of them give each other curious glances, so I keep on rolling. “What I think we need is for all of us get in the car and go do something fun.”

  “And what do you propose this fun thing should be?” my dad asks, mildly amused.

  “I don’t know.” I give a shrug. “I didn’t get that far when I was mentally preparing my speech.”

  My dad looks at my mom who glances at Aunt Lila. Obviously, she’s the ringleader in their quartet.

  “It might be good for everyone to get some fresh air,” she finally says after seconds tick by. “Just as long as we go someplace safe.”

  “And relaxing,” I add, stuffing the rest of the cookie into my mouth.

  “Hmmm . . .” My dad rubs his jawline. “I might know just the place.”

  My dad is a kickass rock star/music producer, so when he said he knew a place that was both safe and relaxing, I was thinking maybe like a chill club that allows kids or perhaps a restaurant where the adults can drink a lot of wine. But nope. He takes us to Rock in Time Playhouse and Grub, which is pretty much a bedazzled pizzeria full of games, bouncy houses, and slides.

  The second we step in, Fiona, Everson, and Kale race for the arcade section. Aunt Lila and Uncle Ethan chase after them while Ayden mutters something about needing to go to the bathroom.

  “I’ll be back in a sec,” my mom says then wanders off to the bar to order a drink, leaving my dad and me to get a table and order food.

  “You know we’re all over twelve,” I say to my dad as I point to the No Kids Over 12 sign beside the ball pit. “That so sucks. I want to jump in there like I used to do when I was a kid.” Back when everything was so simple, so easy, so effortless.

  He waves me off, heading for a corner booth. “That rule doesn’t apply to us.”

  “How do you figure?” I ask as I weave passed the empty tables, following him.

  “Because I know the guy who owns this place.”

  “Man, how many people do you know? Because it seems like a lot.”

  “It comes with the territory of running my own business.” He slides into the booth and plucks a menu from a rack in the center of the table.

  I plop down in the booth and cross my arms on the table. “I’m sure it might have something to do with the fact that you’re a retired rock star.”

  “Perhaps.” He fixes his attention on the menu.

  “How do you do it?” I ask. “I mean, handle people giving you all these special favors and acting weird around you.”

  He shrugs, glancing up at me. “I’m not going to lie. Sometimes it’s not easy and it gets tiring—it’s part of the reason why I retired—but it was fun for a while.”

  “Do you think I’ll be able to handle it? I mean, the environment.” While I’m a pretty confident person, I value his opinion.

  He rests his arms on the table as his mouth curves to a frown. “As much as I want to say no and keep you home with me forever, I honestly think you’ll do just fine. You’re an amazing girl and very level headed.” He grins at me. “Plus, you’ve got my charming personality.”

  “That I do. You’re going to let me go, though, right? I mean, you’re not going to try to keep me home, like Lila’s doing with Ayden.”

  He shakes his head. “Of course not. Besides, I think it’ll be good for you to get away from here for a while and have some fun. Your senior year has been really stressful.”

  “I know.” I spin a saltshaker in my hand. “I just wish Ayden was going with me.”

  “I know you do, but you have to understand how hard it’s got to be for him to even think about going when his sister still hasn’t been found. Plus, I don’t think anyone will be able to convince Lila to let him go.”

  “Yeah, I know.” I sit back in the seat, trying not to let my disappointment get to me. While I’m bummed, I know Lila and Ethan have every right to worry about Ayden. And everyone’s probably right. It’s probably too dangerous for him to go. But the dreamer side of me can’t help but think how much Ayden might regret missing out on this. He’s missed out on so many life experiences already

  Missed.

  Missed.

  Missed.

  I’m going to miss Ayden.

  I’m going to miss everyone.

  “Dad, I’m really going to miss these talks of ours while I’m gone,” I feel the overpowering need to tell him.

  “I am too, Lyric.” He chokes up. “But you know I’ll always be here for you. Whenever you need to talk, just call me. In fact, I insist you call me at least once a day.”

  I stick out my pinkie. “Deal.”

  He hitches pinkies with me, offering me a small smile. “You know I’m the one who taught you how to promise this way, right?”

  “I remember. I was four and you were promising me that you’d be home for my birthday even though you were on tour.”

  “You really remember that?” His eyes gleam with hope.

  “Of course I remember. Just like I remember you never broke one single promise. You’re an awesome dad. Always have been.” I shoot him a cocky smirk. “That’s why I turned out so awesome.”

  “You did turn out pretty freakin’ awesome, if I do say so myself.” He returns his attention to the menu, trying to discreetly wipe the tears from his eyes.

  I really am going to miss him—miss everyone.

  I glance at Kale and Everson freaking out over of a buttload of tickets pouring out of a machine, at Fiona and Ethan playing the arcades, and at my mom and Aunt Lila at the bar, sipping on wine, and laughing about something.

  I smile to myself at how happy they all look.

  Mission of Fun accomplished.

  As I look back to my dad, I note all the tables around us are empty and a thought occurs to me. “Did you ask the owner if we could have this place to ourselves for the day?”

  “I might have.” He smiles as he reads over the menu.

  “Nice job, daddy-o. I’m sure everyone will appreciate the down time.”

  But there’s one thing missing from this pic
ture of fun. Something I think I need to go check on.

  “I’ll be right back.” I jump to my feet and wink at him. “Order me a beer while I’m gone.”

  My dad just shakes his head and mutters, “So much like me.”

  I wind past the tables and burst into the men’s room.

  Ayden is leaning against the tile wall with his head tipped back, his gaze locked on the ceiling. He jumps at my sudden appearance, his eyes popping wide. “Holy shit, you scared me.”

  “No more sulking,” I warn, aiming a finger at him. “You promised me if no one blamed you that you’d let it go.”

  “I wasn’t sulking,” he tries to assure me. “I was just thinking.”

  “About what?”

  “About . . .” He drags his fingers through his hair and puffs out a breath. “About us.”

  My expression fizzles to a frown. “It’s never a good sign when someone is over analyzing their relationship.”

  “No, it’s a good thing this time. I swear.” He strides toward me, stopping only inches away, panic gleaming in his eyes. “I don’t want to be a selfish person, but I can’t stop myself from wanting to be with you. When I saw that letter . . . I realized how easily I could lose you and how much it’d kill me if it happened.”

  I thread my fingers through his. “Then don’t lose me. Be with me.”

  “It’s not that simple.” He lets out a frustrated breath. “Every time something happens, I can’t help but worry that something bad’s going to happen to you and it’ll be my fault.”

  “Nothing’s going to happen to me,” I press.

  “You don’t know that for sure,” he mutters.

  “Okay, you know what, I don’t.” I tug on his arm, pulling him closer to me. “But something bad could happen at any moment, even while we’re standing here. Like the roof could cave in and crush me. That wouldn’t be your fault, and you can’t control it from not happening.”

  “Why would the roof cave in?” he questions with a trace of a ghost smile.

  I give a half shrug. “I don’t know, maybe that foul stench is rotting it away.”

  He chuckles but then his mood nosedives. “I get your point, but I don’t think you’re getting mine.”

  “Okay . . .” I study him closely. “Could you explain it to me then, because apparently, my mind-reading skills are a little wonky right now.”

  “You were right about what you said . . . That no one smiles anymore. Not even you.”

  “I smile.” I grin just to prove my point.

  “But not as much as you used to.”

  “Ayden, that’s not your fault—”

  He places his finger to my lips, shushing me. “I’m not saying it’s my fault. I’m just saying that you deserve to smile more, which I know you will when you’re on the tour. In fact, I bet you’ll smile so much you’ll even get Sage to join in.” He lowers his hand, tracing his fingers down my chin, to my neck, and the collar of my shirt. Goose bumps sprout across my skin, even though it’s a hundred degrees in here. “But I want to be there to see you smile. I want to be the one smiling with you.”

  “I’m not quite sure what you’re saying.” Or maybe I do, and I just don’t want to get my hopes up.

  “Me neither.” He sighs, frustrated. “I just wish I could experience all of it with you.”

  A glimmer of hope shines inside me. “Then experience it with me.”

  “But how am I supposed to do that with all the stuff going on?” Sadness consumes his face. “And what about Sadie? How can I just bail on her?”

  “You wouldn’t be just bailing. You’ve helped a lot. And you can still help.” I step toward him until the tips of our shoes brush. “You want to know how you do it? You just do it—you just go. You say to hell with the faulty roof, flip it the bird, and live your goddamn life.”

  “I wish it were that simple,” he says quietly. “But no one would ever let me just take off. And what if the Soulless Mileas chase me down? What if I put everyone in danger?”

  “Those are all possibilities, but so is the police finding the people who are doing this to you. They could find Sadie. This could all be over soon. You never know. That’s the thing, Ayden, you never know about anything. Just like you never know if you’ll ever have a chance to do something like this tour again. It might be a once in a lifetime opportunity. And if you want to go, then we’ll find a way. Don’t let anyone take away your life from you.” I hold my breath, waiting for him to agree that he’ll do it. Go with me on this crazy three-month journey lying ahead of me.

  He doesn’t flat out say it, but he does faintly smile and the tension in his body unwinds.

  “We’ll talk to our parents and figure something out if you decide you want to do this,” I say, trying not to get too hopeful. Not until he says it aloud. “But right now, there’s something way more important we need to do.”

  His forehead furrows as he stares at me. “And what’s that?”

  A wicked grin rises on my face as I haul him toward the door. “We need to go jump in the ball pit. Like, right now.”

  He laughs as I drag him out of the bathroom and through the restaurant. I don’t slow down as we race for the ball bit. I just hold on until the edge and then jump.

  WE LAND IN THE BALL pit, holding hands, and sink into a sea of plastic balls. When our feet hit the floor, Lyric laughs and pushes up to the top, like she’s swimming in water.

  “I always loved playing in these when I was a kid,” she says as she twirls around in a circle, creating a funnel.

  “I’ve never actually been in one,” I admit as I pick up a ball and chuck into the air like a baseball.

  “Well, now you can’t say that anymore.” She moves over by me. “Tell me one of your secret wishes.”

  I cock a brow at her. “One of my secret wishes?”

  She nods, her green eyes sparkling. “I used to play this game with my dad when I was a kid. He would tell me his secret wish, then I’d tell him mine.” She grins deviously. “He once told me that he secretly wished he could be a superhero for a day and wear a cape. I think he just said that, though, because he was trying to keep his wish PG.”

  I snort a laugh. “Why would I tell you my secret wish when you just outed your dad’s?”

  “Because you love me.” Her bottom lip juts out and she bats her eyelashes at me as she clasps her hands in front of her. “Pretty please, Shy Boy.”

  I shake my head, but she’s too damn adorable, and I can’t help but smile. “You know that I know you do that on purpose, right?”

  “Do what?” she asks innocently.

  I touch the finger to her bottom lip. “Pout to get your way.”

  “Then why do you give me my way still?”

  “Because I love giving you your way,” I admit with a shrug. “I guess that’s my secret wish. That I could always give you your way all the time. That I could give you what I know you want.”

  “You mean with the tour?” She catches my hidden meaning.

  I nod. “I’m going to try to go for you, but I can’t promise anything.”

  “Don’t try for me.” She loops her arms around me, angles her head back, and looks up at me. “Try for yourself.”

  Her long, blonde hair veils down her back, her green eyes glisten in the light, and her chest is pressed against mine. She looks so fucking beautiful right now, I could write a song about it.

  Eyes so green

  That carry love for me.

  How is that even possible?

  How can something so beautiful

  Be in love with some like me?

  And her lips, so perfect

  I can’t taste enough of them.

  And when she touches me,

  It’s too fucking complicated to breathe.

  “I’ll try for both of us,” I tell her. “Just as long as you do something for me.”

  “And what’s that?”

  “Kiss me—”

  She crashes her lips to mine before I can even
get the words out. Our tongues tangle as we sink into the pit. My hand skates down her side to her thigh and I lift her leg up and hitch it over my hip. She moans against my mouth as she grinds against me. I knot my fingers through her hair, feeling so comfortable being with her it’s mind blowing. Just like the other night when she put her hands on me. It was the first time I ever allowed someone to touch me like that, and it was terrifying and incredible at the same time.

  “Mom, Lyric and Ayden are making out in the ball pit!” Fiona announces as she steps up to the edge of the pit and points at us.

  I softly toss a plastic ball at her, and she laughs, skittering out of the way.

  “One day, when you’re making out with your boyfriend,” I tell her, “I’m going to get you back for that.”

  Fiona sticks out her tongue then skips off toward the game machines.

  I spot Ethan and Mr. Scott heading our way. I don’t think they’re coming to yell at us for making out, but I’m not about to keep kissing Lyric when her dad could see us.

  I sigh. “I guess that puts an end to our ball pit fun.”

  “You know they know we kiss, right?” Her brows arch. “In fact, I’m pretty sure they think we’re having sex already, since my mom found that safe sex pamphlet in my nightstand drawer.”

  My lips part in shock. “She—You didn’t—You told her we weren’t having sex, didn’t you?”

  “I told her we weren’t yet,” she says. “But I’ve always been pretty close with my family, and I felt like I needed to tell her,” she shrugs, “That we’re getting really close to that point. At least I think we are.”

  I cast an unnerved glance at her dad as he busts up laughing at something Ethan says. “Does your dad know too?”

  “My mom and dad tell each other everything, so maybe.” She tosses a ball aside then lines her chest with mine. “Would you relax? They know we’re in love, and that we aren’t just two teenagers getting their freak on.”

  “You told them we’re in love?” I whisper, a mixture of fear and nerves.