One Night Only
“I'll wash, you dry,” he offered. When I gave him a surprised look, he laughed. “Worked my way across Europe, remember?”
I nodded and pulled the dish soap from under the sink.
“Anyway,” he continued. “The dance studio, that's back in Philadelphia, isn't it?”
I sighed. “It is.”
“And the way you were talking before, it sounded like you hadn't really wanted to go back.”
I shook my head. He really was observant.
“Is the grant something you want?”
I considered the question before answering right away. I was younger than Julien, but I wasn't a kid anymore. If I had dreams, they couldn't be the fantasies of a child. I knew I loved to dance, but did I really want to go to school for it? I was twenty-three, and for a dancer, that was almost too old for where I was. If I didn't take this now, I wouldn't have another chance. There was no probably or maybe about it. This was it.
“I want it,” I admitted and my heart squeezed at the possibility. “All I've ever wanted to be is a dancer.” I looked around the apartment. “And this isn't what I had in mind.”
If I took the offer, I could leave this place, quit my job. I wouldn't have to strip anymore. Granted, it meant I was going back to a place with a lot of painful memories and I'd have to find a new job there, but I'd be pursuing my passion and not taking off my clothes for creepy old guys and leering twenty-somethings.
“Look, I know this whole thing isn't any of my business,” Julien said as he handed me a plate to dry. “But based on everything you've told me, and knowing there's a lot you haven't, you've been through a hell of a lot.”
I couldn't really disagree with that. True, there were a lot of people who'd had a rougher life than me, but it didn't mean mine wasn't hard, just that theirs was worse.
“The way I see it,” he reasoned. “You deserve to have something go right for once.”
I exhaled, and then breathed that thought back in. Maybe he was right, I thought as I put the dishes away. It wasn't like I'd asked Reed to do this for me, and he'd said it was an apology. That didn't sound like it came with any strings attached except possible forgiveness. And this wasn't like Brock's offer of money, which would've helped me of course; but it wouldn't have changed anything, not really. And it definitely wasn't like Reed's offer to keep me in Vegas as his mistress. This was an opportunity to change things, to move forward with my life.
Julien leaned back against the sink and glanced at his watch. “Well, my plane leaves soon, so I need to go get my stuff.” He straightened, his expression sobering. “Are you going to be okay?”
I nodded. “I will. And thank you for being here. I don't know if I would've been okay yesterday without you.”
“You have a pen?”
I looked at him, puzzled, but pointed toward the refrigerator where Rosa and I had a pen with a magnet so we could write things we needed on a notepad. Julien scrawled something on a piece of paper, tore it off and handed it to me.
“My number,” he explained. “Call me when you make a decision or if you just need to talk.”
I waited for the inevitable addition, wondering if it would be a “look me up if you're back in Philly” or “I'll hit you up the next time I'm in Vegas,” but it never came. He put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed, but the touch was as platonic as it got. “Hopefully I'll see you back home.” He smiled at me. “You deserve it.”
“Thanks,” I said. “And I will... call you, I mean.”
I kept looking at the door even after it closed. I hadn't just been polite, I realized. I really was thinking about calling Julien if I went back to the city. I'd enjoyed the time we'd spent together over the week. Well, the moments Brock hadn't been ruining by being an ass. And then there was the way he'd behaved through this whole shitstorm. He'd defended me more than once to Brock, ending with a punch, and then he'd held me while I'd cried without trying to take advantage of the situation.
I hadn't truly realized how rare something like that was in a man until yesterday.
As much as I'd been grateful for his help, comfort and advice, I wasn't about to trust a huge decision to a ten-minute conversation with someone who was practically a stranger. I needed a second opinion – well, third if mine counted as the first – and there was only one person who I could trust to be completely honest.
Besides, she deserved to know that she'd been right about Brock, no matter how much I hated to have to go through it all again.
It was close to nine, which meant Anastascia would be at the gym, so I finished cleaning up and even took out the trash. I didn't want to have a single thing in my apartment that reminded me about this disastrous week. By the time I finished cleaning and took a shower, it was close to noon and I knew Anastascia would be home again.
She answered almost immediately. “What'd he do?”
“What?” I was so startled I didn't even think to just answer her question.
“You already told me some of the shit that boy was up to. Now, if he was as good as you said he was, you'd still be snuggling with him in bed instead of calling me.”
“Damn.” I flopped back on my bed. “You're good.”
“I know,” she said. “Now, spill.”
Spill I did. I picked up from the last time she and I had talked and told her everything that had happened, the good and the bad. When I got to the part where Brock confessed what he'd done and tried to do at the bachelor party, she started cursing so loudly that I had to hold my phone away from my ear. The language turned into the many painful ways she wished to torture and kill him, not the least of which involved stripping him naked and tying him outside during the coldest night in winter and letting bits of him freeze off.
When she finally ran out of horrible things to say about Brock, she said something that nearly rendered me speechless.
“I'm so sorry, Piper.”
“For what? You warned me about him,” I said when I found my voice.
“If I'd known he'd try something like that, I wouldn't have let up until you dumped him.”
“You know me,” I said. “It wouldn't have done any good. I would've kept it up, just to prove you wrong.”
“True,” she admitted.
“And before you start in on Brock again, there's more.”
“You're joking.”
“Oh, no. That was just the start of my crazy night.”
By the time I was done, Anastascia was unusually quiet. I waited for a few minutes, and then couldn't take it anymore.
“So?”
“So what?”
I scowled at the phone. “So what am I supposed to do?”
“Shh,” Anastascia shushed me. “I'm trying to figure out if I should redecorate the guest room. You like taupe, right?”
Three
Anastascia did indeed redecorate her guest room, but she'd decided on a dusky rose color instead of taupe. She'd said I should help choose since I was going to be her roommate, but I'd insisted that the arrangements were just temporary and that she do it herself while I was tying things up in Vegas. She'd pressed the issue until I told her that if I was going to move back and try this whole dance thing, I wanted to make a completely fresh start, including living on my own. It was just something I had to do. After that, she'd moved on to other topics related to my arrival.
It had taken a couple weeks for me to get things in order since I hadn't wanted to leave Rosa in the lurch. I didn't care quite so much about a two-week notice at The Diamond Club, but since I'd been waiting for Rosa to find a new roommate, I picked up as many extra shifts as possible so I'd have at least some money while I looked for a job in Philly. The kind of jobs a high school graduate with experience stripping and waiting tables could get weren't exactly the kind you could find online and send in a resumé for. Anastascia loaned me the money for my ticket, but I hadn't wanted to borrow any more off of her while I was waiting to get a job.
I arrived in Philadelphia on a Friday evening in mid-A
ugust and spent the weekend walking the streets and putting in applications despite Anastascia telling me to take it easy for at least a couple days since I started classes on Monday. The only concession I made was to come back early so we could have dinner together.
Now it was Monday morning and I was standing outside a small studio only a few blocks away from Anastascia's place. That had been another reason I hadn't argued too much about staying in her guest room until I found a place of my own. If I could get a job nearby, it would be perfect. There were plenty of cheaper apartments in Fishtown that, eventually, I'd be able to afford.
That was for later though. Right now, I needed to focus on dance. Technically, I wasn't starting a class today. I was observing three different level classes and then would be tested to see where I fit. If they wanted to, they could say that I didn't qualify at all, but I had enough faith in myself that I'd, at the very least, get in on the bottom level.
Concentration was the key.
As I entered the studio, I found myself in a tastefully decorated space. It was clearly the work of an interior designer and the budget had been vast, but it wasn't ostentatious. I introduced myself to the woman at the desk, endured her disapproving glare as she looked at my obviously worn clothes. Moments later, I let myself enjoy the way she pursed her lips when she had to wave me back toward the changing room.
As I walked into the changing room, I once again found myself wondering how Reed had managed to pull this off. This wasn't the kind of studio that everyone in Philadelphia knew of, because Madam Emilana was extremely particular about the students she accepted and she didn't advertise. There always had to be some sort of personal connection, a referral. Had he donated funds to the school on top of establishing the grant that would pay my tuition? Or was she one of his business contacts, the kind of high society person whose favor-for-favor exchange was generally in the hundred thousands to millions?
I pushed the thoughts out of my mind as I headed into the main studio area. The biggest downside to coming back here, I'd discovered, had been my thoughts constantly going to Reed. I told myself the reason was that I hadn't thanked him for the gift because that meant having to address what had happened the last time we'd seen each other.
I'd been wrong that night, and I knew it. This whole thing with Reed and Britni was a mess, but no matter how I felt about that, I knew, deep down, that Reed would never let any woman be taken advantage of. If he'd known what Brock had done, he wouldn't have let it go. Accusing him of not only being culpable, but also wanting to participate had been out of line.
I just didn't know how to tell him all of that.
“You must be Miss Black.”
A woman's sharp voice brought me back to myself. She was tall and slender, but muscled. With a graceful neck and perfect posture, I knew instantly she'd been a ballerina.
“I’m Janine Weathers, Madam Emilana's assistant.” She smoothed down her already-perfect bun. “I teach the remedial and intermediate levels. Madam Emilana teaches the advanced class as well as private sessions for those students who she believes have the talent to go further.”
I nodded. That was my goal then. Private lessons.
“Today, you will sit in on both of my classes and then in Madam Emilana's. Once those are completed, you will perform in front of us. We alone will determine your placement.” She glowered down at me. “Any questions?”
“Is there anything you want me to do with the classes?”
A muscle in her jaw clenched. “That won't be necessary. The point of you sitting in the classes today is so that when you place lower than you believe you should be, you'll have a reference point to see what we expect.”
I stared at her as she started toward the front of the studio.
“Don't mind her.”
I looked over as a girl in her mid-teens grinned at me. “Miss Janine is like that with everyone. She says it's a way to weed out the weak; that if you can't handle her being harsh privately, then you'll never make it out there.”
I smiled at the girl and headed for the bench against the sidewall while she went to the rail to stretch out. While I still wasn't fond of the attitude, I understood it now and could appreciate the sentiment behind it. Miss Janine was right about how hard it was out there. The competition for this particular field was intense. I didn't know what the specific stats were, but I did know that the number of girls who made it was well below half.
I studied each of the moves as Miss Janine put the girls through their paces. I had a basic routine in my head that I was going to do, but I'd purposefully left gaps so I could see what the students did first. I figured if I put in and nailed at least two or three things that each class was working on, the better shot I had at being placed higher.
I was relieved to see that the remedial class wasn't working on anything I didn't know. It had been a long time since I'd done real dancing, and while I'd been practicing the last couple weeks, I hadn't been sure where I'd compare to the other students. When the intermediates arrived, I saw that the majority of them were around my age. Most of them smiled at me as they walked past, and the ones who didn't, had expressions on their faces that said when they were here, they never smiled at anyone. I understood that too. Focus was important.
I could see the difference between the classes immediately. These were young women who were looking toward a possible career in dance, whether as an instructor or on stage. From what I saw, I believed I could hold my own with them, maybe even be better.
As they exited, I noticed a couple linger behind, watching the door. When a striking older woman with silver streaks in her dark hair entered the room, the students' reactions told me that this was Madam Emilana. She glanced at me once, nodded and then turned her attention back to the new young women who were stretching. They ranged in age from about fifteen to at least several years older than me, and even watching them at the bar was evidence that they were the advanced class. These were the ones who had a shot of making it. Some maybe only in local troupes, but they'd be doing what they loved.
I was completely entranced as the class worked. I hadn't truly acknowledged how much I missed this. When I'd first started stripping, I'd tried to keep my style and had been told that if guys wanted to see that, they'd go to a show. If anything kept me from being in the advanced class right away, it would be the rough edge I'd unintentionally gained while in Vegas.
When the class ended, some students filed back to the changing room while others left directly. Madam Emilana didn't acknowledge my presence until the last woman left, and then she walked over to me. I stood and held out my hand. Her grip was firm and her eye contact steady. She didn't look down at me or frown like the other two women had and I wondered if that was because of her personality or if she didn't know where I came from. I assumed the other two did.
“Miss Black.” Her voice had a hint of an accent I couldn't quite place. “Once Miss Janine joins us, we'll begin your audition.”
I nodded. “Thank you for the opportunity.”
“Of course.” She gave me a smile that said once work ended, the tough teacher went away too. “Any friend of the Stirling family is welcome here.”
I managed a tight smile. Okay, so that answered one question.
“Reed mentioned that you didn't have any formal training,” she said.
“That's true. A few classes at the local youth center when I was a kid, but that was it.”
“And you think you'll be able to keep up with our classes after a few classes as a kid?” She sounded doubtful but not cruel.
It wasn't until that moment that I realized what I should have known before. They didn't know what I'd been doing in Vegas. No one here did. This really was my chance for a fresh start.
“Let's see what you have prepared,” Madam Emilana said as she and Miss Janine moved to stand at the front of the studio.
With the weight that had been lifted at the idea of a clean slate, the routine went even better than I'd hoped. I added in eac
h of the elements I'd selected from the three classes, nailing the first ones with ease, the second set without a problem and almost completing the last ones perfectly. A little bobble on one and another that looked a bit rough, but still recognizable. The other parts had been brought in from various forms of dancing I'd done over the years, though the ones from the last two years were much more sanitized versions. All in all, when I finished, I was beyond pleased with what I'd done. I just hoped the judges slash teachers felt the same way.
When I first looked at them, my heart sank because they were turned toward each other, having what appeared to be a low, heated discussion, though their faces were basically blank.
“Miss Black,” Miss Janine turned toward me first. “You stated that you hadn't had any formal training.”
“That's right.” I sounded more winded than I wanted to, but there wasn't anything I could do about that now.
“Then may I ask how you included elements specifically taught in dance classes, one of which is exclusively taught here?”
I wasn't sure if she was angry or not, but I figured honesty was the best way to go. “I watched the classes and chose elements that would fit into the spaces I'd left in my routine.”
Miss Janine's eyebrows shot up. “You're telling us that you came here with a half-completed piece, intending to fit in unknown elements that you'd never practiced before?”
I tried not to shift my weight from one foot to the other, but the questions were making me nervous. I wasn't sure if I'd done something wrong or what the correct answer was, so I stuck with the truth. “Yes.”
“How did you know you'd be able to do anything we were teaching?”
Madam Emilana still hadn't spoken. She was simply watching the conversation volley back and forth, her face an impassive mask.
I shrugged and immediately regretted it. A shrug was about as far from elegant as a person could get. I straightened my posture. “If I couldn't do at least what the remedial class was doing, I didn't belong here. If the other levels would've been too hard to even try, I would've only added ones from the first class.”