Carnal Secrets

“Yep.”

  The possessive glint in her eyes made him smile. Leaning down, he bit Shaya’s bottom lip hard and then licked across it to soothe the sting. “You’re never going to get away from me, you know. You’re mine. I’m keeping you. For good.” He’d expected her to snort at him or maybe look wary, but she surprised him by relaxing slightly in his arms. His wolf growled in contentment, convinced that his mate was coming around to the idea of being claimed. But Nick often found himself wondering if it was something she would ever be ready for.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Shaya had always been good at defusing situations and calming tempers, which was ironic considering her own temper was pretty bad. However, defusing any arguments that occurred between Taryn and Amber took a great deal of effort—something Shaya had quickly come to learn over the last four weeks. As such, she was tapping her foot impatiently while she stood between the two females in the living area who ranted at each other, pointing fingers and scowling. Meeting her mate’s gaze, who was sitting on the sofa looking both amused and exasperated, Shaya struggled not to laugh at the insults being exchanged.

  Amber had done exactly as Derren had said she would—she’d tried extremely hard to become close friends with Shaya. But when that hadn’t worked, she had instead taken to trying to provoke Shaya with sugar-coated insults and backhanded compliments that had been so cleverly delivered they sounded totally innocent to most people. Taryn, however, knew exactly what Amber was doing. Whereas Shaya’s response to Amber had been to act sickly sweet rather than snap—which would have made her seem unnecessarily bitchy and hostile toward Amber—Taryn was much too direct to cope with her shit. And now the bitch had done what she knew would piss Taryn the hell off: She’d touched her mate.

  Amber threw her hands up in the air. “All I did was touch him with my fingertip—I was trying to heal the cut on his hand!”

  Taryn sniggered. “Well thanks, E.T., but I can heal him myself! Touch him again, and—”

  “Girls, girls,” intervened Shaya, sighing. She kept her tone even and calm as she spoke. “You’ve both made your point. The solution here is clear: Amber, it would be extremely smart if you didn’t touch Trey again.”

  “It was just his hand!”

  Taryn pointed hard at her. “That’s not the point, and you know it. Don’t think I don’t see you for the cunning little bitch that you are.”

  “I just wanted to heal him.” Oh, Amber’s innocent act was good. “Nick, surely you’re not going to let Taryn speak to me this way!”

  Nick simply shrugged. “I’m not your Alpha anymore, Amber. Your problems are yours to deal with.”

  Right answer, thought Shaya.

  “But I just wanted to heal him! It’s part of who I am.”

  Playing along to end the whole thing by being impartial, Shaya nodded. “And kind though it was, it truly wasn’t necessary—Trey’s paper cut was certainly not fatal, and Taryn was right beside him in any case, so she could have healed him if necessary. Plus, touching a mated male when you’re not mated yourself isn’t totally wise.”

  Amber planted a hand on her hip. “Dominic touches you all the time. What’s the difference?”

  “Maybe you haven’t noticed that the pervert is covered in nettle stings after I threw him in the bush for kissing Shaya,” said Nick, not even bothering to stifle his smile. Annoyingly, Dominic found the whole thing funny too. To Nick’s surprise, he’d actually come to like the pervert over the last month. The guy was pretty smart, very observational, and extremely loyal to his pack…but he just couldn’t resist provoking Nick from time to time.

  “Now I think it would be wise if both of you stayed out of each other’s way until you’re both calm,” said Shaya. They looked about to protest, but then they gave each other one last scowl and waltzed away in opposite directions. Blowing out a heavy breath, Shaya went to stand between Nick’s legs. His hands immediately landed on her hips, his thumbs tracing her hipbones. “I think it’s safe to say that those two will never get along.”

  Tugging her down so that she was straddling him, Nick kissed her lightly. “You’re really good at that.” At her questioning look, he explained, “Easing tension and stopping arguments.” So good that not only had she managed to calm two dominant females, but they had listened to her—not bristling at a submissive wolf interfering. Also, she had managed to remain impartial despite that she’d known how badly Amber was in the wrong and despite that she truly disliked her.

  “I guess so,” she agreed a little breathlessly as his tongue licked at a mark he’d recently left on her throat. “Still, I can’t guarantee Taryn won’t one day launch herself at Amber and scratch her eyes out.” The thought was pretty appealing. The bitch was always lingering, uninvited. Not that Amber was the only one, to be fair. As Derren went wherever Nick went, the only time Derren wasn’t around was when he was sleeping in the motor home—it was empty other than for Bruce, as Nick now stayed with Shaya.

  Although the Phoenix wolves all stayed in the shifter motel like Nick’s family, some of them visited at least once a day. Roni hung around a lot too, though she mostly remained outside. Not only that, Jesse, Bracken, and Zander patrolled the perimeter of the house “on guard”—and totally of their own accord. They returned home to bathe and change when they needed to, but that was pretty much it; they had apparently decided to attach themselves to Nick, though it was hardly surprising to her. As Derren had said, Nick drew people to him and inspired them—he just didn’t see it. Expectedly, having all these people around annoyed the shit out of Nick.

  “You know,” began Nick, “I’m actually surprised that Amber was ballsy enough to touch Trey. The Alpha female isn’t someone anyone should go out of their way to aggravate. In fact, I’m equally surprised Taryn didn’t draw blood.”

  “Personally, I think Amber was hoping that Taryn would try to attack her so you would fly to Amber’s rescue—after all, it’d be pretty instinctive for you, considering she was once under your protection.” That would then have resulted in Shaya going ballistic at Nick for siding with Amber, as Shaya’s loyalty lay with Taryn.

  Recalling how Amber had turned to him for support, Nick thought Shaya might just be right. “Well, if she honestly thinks I’ll jump to her defense, she’s very mistaken.”

  “The woman’s getting on my last nerve, trailing after you all the time. And her playing the ‘close friend’ card is annoying too.” Shaya cringed at how every word had dripped with jealousy.

  “I don’t have friends, you know that.”

  “Yes, you do. You just don’t realize it.” When utter confusion flashed across his face, she rolled her eyes. “Derren doesn’t stick with you just because he wants to guard you. He does it because you’re his friend. And what about all those friends who helped you track me down?”

  “Contacts. They are contacts.”

  “I suppose these people who repeatedly call you and Derren, asking if you need backup against the humans, aren’t your friends either,” she said dryly.

  Nick shrugged. “I don’t bond.”

  Shaya shook her head, sighing. “You’re a hopeless case, Nick Axton.”

  “And you’re being jealous for no good reason,” he assured her gently as he collared her throat and then tipped her head backward. “I only want you.” He ran his tongue along her collarbone, loving the taste and smell of her. “When you’re finally ready to trust me totally, I’ll prove that by claiming you. Until then, I’m going to spend my time kissing you and biting you and fucking you ’til you accept that you’re mine.”

  She didn’t say what she was thinking, that she had already accepted that she was his, and that the problem was she couldn’t fully accept and trust that he would always be hers. It was becoming less and less about the fact that he had once left her, and more and more about her own insecurities. How could she not worry that he would one day look at her and find her lacking because she didn’t match him in strength on every level? If he had been merely a domin
ant male, it wouldn’t be so much of an issue. But he was a born alpha. How could she not worry that he might one day resent her for being the reason he had left his pack and couldn’t hold an Alpha position anywhere? It would torture and stifle Nick’s wolf to obey someone else when he was a natural-born leader.

  It was fair to say that he hadn’t given her any reason to believe that these insecurities were rational. In fact, over the past month he had made her feel nothing but cherished. Not with soppy words or actions, but by the way he gave her his total and utter attention—an unwavering focus that both ate her up and comforted her. When he thought she needed or wanted something, she suddenly had it. When he believed there was a problem, he took care of it.

  She’d been right to think he wasn’t a guy who could ever be “managed”—his iron will wouldn’t allow it—but he didn’t try to manage her either. He didn’t try to walk all over her as other dominant males had done, and he was quick to snap if he thought anyone else tried to do it. He made her happy. But could she make him happy? Could she really hold someone like Nick? Could a mating bond ever truly be enough if it might mean he and his wolf were forced to live packless and with no territory to call their own? When it would mean that any children they had would be also be forced to live that life?

  “You’re thinking too hard.” Nick lifted her head and bit her lip. “Stop.”

  “Like it’s that simple.”

  “If it’s a distraction you need,” he began with a devilish smile, grinding her against him, “I can happily help you out with it.” Taking her upstairs, he did just that.

  A few hours later, Shaya was sitting on her sofa drinking coffee and watching with a smile as Roni lay protectively where Kye was playing with his toys on the carpet with Dominic and Taryn. Although Kye wouldn’t be able to use his gift of healing psychological scars until he was much older, he still oozed a feeling of safety that attracted anyone with such scars. It was safe to say that Roni had some.

  As was often the case, the living area was pretty crowded. Shaya, Derren, and Trey were on the sofa. Greta and Kathy had each taken an armchair. And Tao and Amber had each dragged in one of the dining chairs. Amber had also brought in a spare chair, and Shaya was pretty sure it was supposed to be for Nick—who was currently in the kitchen speaking with Eli on his cell phone. Shaya had to give it to her, the bitch was certainly persistent.

  She supposed that in Amber’s eyes, it was Shaya who was the one interfering. Amber had most likely viewed Nick as hers for a very long time and may have even convinced herself they had a chance of imprinting one day. Having felt the sting of rejection, Shaya would have sympathized with Amber—okay, she might have sympathized with her—if Nick hadn’t made it clear to his entire pack that he didn’t intend to mate with anyone but his true mate. If Amber had convinced herself otherwise, it was her problem.

  “This is bad, isn’t it?” asked Kathy, referring to the news report that was practically dedicated to making shifters seem like a species that needed to be completely eradicated. “The extremists might just win this fight and have the laws put in place.”

  “They won’t win the bigger fight,” stated Derren. “No shifter is going to allow themselves to be chipped or confined somewhere. All this is about control. It’s in our nature to want freedom—we need it.”

  “You think a war will break out between us and the humans?” asked Dominic.

  Derren raised a brow at him. “Would you be prepared to let them take away your freedom like that?”

  “Hell no.”

  “Then there’s your answer.”

  “But the humans have to know how bad things could get,” said Tao. “They can’t be so stupid as to pass laws that will lead to a war.”

  “Why not?” Derren snorted. “They battle among themselves often enough—much more so than shifters do. And they’re arrogant enough to believe they’ll win because they know there’s a higher population of them than us. What they don’t know is that not all shifter packs have come out of the closet. There’s a lot more of us than humans can even imagine, and many different species of shifter.”

  Trey exhaled a heavy breath. “The problem is, though, that although we’re stronger than them, it won’t mean shit in a full-scale war. They have all kinds of fancy weapons. We fight with tooth and claw. There’s likely to be more damage done to us than them.”

  “You’re right there,” said Greta with a sigh. “But spending our time grumbling about it isn’t doing us any good. I say we find something to take our minds off it instead of watching this garbage.”

  “Like what?” asked Tao.

  “I don’t know…something constructive and fun.”

  Taryn smiled cheerily. “Great, I’ll help you pack.”

  Greta narrowed her eyes at Taryn, who simply shot her another cheery smile.

  At that moment, Nick entered the room, and Shaya’s wolf lolled onto her side, happy. As always, his presence demanded attention. It certainly got Amber’s attention, who flashed him a huge smile and patted the chair beside her. But it was Shaya he went to. He carefully lifted her and then took her seat before placing her on his lap. Content, she lounged against him, enabling him to nuzzle her neck.

  “How’s Eli doing?” Derren asked Nick.

  “Wishing he could be up here, part of the action,” replied Nick. It was typical of his brother—the guy feared nothing and loved any kind of action. “Other than that, he’s fine.” Nick couldn’t resist licking over the fresh bite he’d delivered to the soft flesh of Shaya’s neck earlier. She shuddered, satisfying both him and his wolf.

  “When are you going back to work, Shaya?” asked Amber pleasantly, most likely looking forward to Shaya and Nick being separated during the daytime so she could get him alone. Tramp.

  “Not until the place is fixed up,” replied Shaya just as pleasantly. The insurance company was dragging its heels, which was infuriating Kent.

  Unlike with Amber, Kathy’s friendly tone was authentic. “Have you thought of applying for another job?”

  “That’s already covered.”

  At her mate’s shocking words, Shaya slowly turned her head to look at him. “Already covered?”

  “Yes. You’ve already applied for another job.”

  “What does that mean? And did it occur to you that I might want to keep the job I have?” She couldn’t help feeling slightly affronted.

  Nick merely shrugged. “If you don’t want the other job, you don’t have to take it. It’s simply an option for you to consider.”

  “What job?” asked Taryn, curious.

  “I’m not prepared to say anything until I’m absolutely positive that the interview process isn’t already over.”

  Shaya frowned. “So it’s an interview? Not a guaranteed position?”

  Nick cupped her chin. “I know you, and I know that if you want this job, you’ll want to have it because you were the best person for the job—not because of contacts I have. Besides, you don’t need my interference. I have every confidence in you.”

  That made things a little different, and hearing he had such faith in her warmed her. “Thank you.” Right then, all she wanted was to straddle him again and kiss him hard in gratitude…but as usual, they didn’t have much privacy, and Shaya wasn’t an exhibitionist. “I have an idea.”

  “If it involves getting naked, I’m game.”

  She rolled her eyes, despite that her thoughts hadn’t been far away from his. The guy could so easily have her pining for him, even if it had only been a matter of hours since he had last been inside her. “Let’s go out somewhere—just you and me.” Of course she understood that Derren would still tag along, but he’d be polite enough to keep a fair distance away and pretend he couldn’t hear their conversations.

  Nick grinned. “I like that idea.”

  She whispered low enough for only him to hear. “I can take the butt plug out before we leave, though, right?”

  He laughed. “How can I say no when you were such
a good girl for me earlier?” They had gone from using fingers to butt plugs and slowly increasing them in size. Some would say it wasn’t necessary since, as his mate, she was made to take him everywhere and he’d automatically fit snugly there. Still, he didn’t want her in even the slightest bit of pain when he finally took her.

  Not so long later, they were sitting in an ice-cream parlor, sharing a caramel sundae. Mostly, though, he just watched—totally enraptured—as Shaya licked and swirled her tongue around the ice cream, wearing a teasing smile, knowing exactly what she was doing to him and exactly how jealous he was of that sundae right then.

  After that, they went shopping and—no surprise—Shaya bought a pair of stilettos. No more than twenty minutes later, she’d bought another two pairs. Not that Nick was complaining, since she looked sexy as hell in them. And she’d known just how much she was tantalizing him by modeling them for him in the store. In fact, she’d drawn several male gazes, and naturally, Nick had snarled at every one of those males.

  Hours later, they were at a Mexican restaurant, and Shaya was driving him insane by picking at her food like a bird rather than eating it properly. When she’d ignored his insistence that she eat more, he’d given her a look that swore repercussions. Then, figuring she deserved it, he’d teasingly nibbled and licked at her fingers and hand, whispering the things he fully intended to do to her when they were finally home. Flushed and horny, she’d turned a little cranky until she saw just how hard he was. Realizing she wasn’t alone in her desperate state and realizing just how well her teasing had worked, she’d gone from cranky to smug.

  The time alone had been just what they needed, in Nick’s opinion—and not just because he disliked company unless it was Shaya. It was kind of hard to spend time trying to win her complete trust and faith when people were hanging around, depriving them of privacy. He understood why the Phoenix wolves did it; they wanted to be nearby in case they were needed. And, naturally, they’d all missed Shaya since she left their pack, just as Kathy and Roni had missed him. Taryn in particular spent a lot of time with them, and he knew it was because she was deliberately trying to make things hard as hell for him. He could understand it, but it still made him pissed, because not having her best friend’s total support was hurting Shaya.