Jane 8086 Part Three

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  The cab ride home wasn't a long one, just enough for Jane to put up a mild protest about the fact that they were wasting precious time when they should be using the daylight to further acclimate her to their surroundings. Remi was, however, able to convince her of the virtues of 'laying low'. They were back outside the apartment building in a quick five minutes and Remi cursed his sense of timing when, at the precise moment that the cab driver pulled up to the curb, Allison threw open the door to his building. He was just about to suggest to Jane that perhaps he'd been too hasty and that maybe a walk in the park would be nice...when Jane acted of her own accord.

  "Look, Remi! It's Allison," she said, exiting the vehicle.

  "Your hair! Your hair!" Remi whispered harshly.

  Luckily Jane had thought ahead and her color changed from blonde to brunette right at the roofline of the car. To the driver, a blond had exited, and to Allison, a brunette had emerged. Jane made a beeline for Remi's ex-wife with her hand extended, "hello, Allison. It's so good to see you again!" She punctuated the greeting with an oversized smile.

  Allison took Jane's hand as though she were accepting a used diaper. "Oh, Jane. Fancy seeing you here...again," said Allison in a morose fashion, wriggling her way out of Jane's grip. "It's almost like you live here," she added with a venomous glare.

  "I do, Allison," Jane beamed with a good-natured smile, "this is mine and Remi's home."

  Remi had paid and exited the cab just in time to hear the words leave Jane's mouth. In his mind he imagined himself dropping to his knees and screaming the word 'no' for as long as his lungs would let him. "What she means to say is—"

  "Oh, come now, Rembrandt," Allison interrupted, faking an air of nonchalance almost perfectly, "of course it's none of my business, but why you felt the need to hide the fact that you're in such an important relationship is absolutely beyond me," she added, finishing with a smile that wasn't quite convincing and a pat on Remi's shoulder.

  "Well...uh," Remi struggle to find something to say, but at that particular moment, his mind had gone completely blank.

  Jane, noticing his hesitation, stepped in—by mathematical formula no less—a microsecond before awkwardness was due to set in. "Would you like to come upstairs for a smoothie, Allison?" she asked with an enticing facial expression that was half a lopsided grin and half one raised eyebrow, "they're really good for you, but Remi doesn't think they taste very nice. He says they're awful. I make them myself," Jane added when Allison seemed at a loss for words.

  Allison forced a laugh and waved her hand at Jane, only just brushing the tips of her fingers against Jane's jacket, "well it looks like you've done a better job with him than I have. It took Remi two years to admit that he didn't care for my cooking."

  Jane looked back with a shocked expression, "Remi is a good man, Allison. Your cooking must have been the most terrible thing he's ever tasted if he was no longer able to endure it and forced to divorce you."

  "Oh my," Allison said, looking more than a little flushed while Remi choked on his own saliva and began coughing uncontrollably, "don't you have a sense of humor."

  Jane placed her hand on Remi's neck and two seconds later the coughing stopped as if by divine intervention. "Thank you, Jane," said Remi, clearing his throat.

  "My, my. A comedian and a healer," Allison breathed with barely concealed loathing. "Anyway," she continued in a fresh vein, "I was just dropping by to tell you that Mark helped me find the missing notes. I did tell you about Mark didn't I? Yes! He's the new man in my life. Oh, you know, now that I've got you both here...he actually just texted me to let me know that he's made reservations for us tonight. How about I message him back and tell him to make it a foursome? Yeah?" she asked with her arms spread wide. "Come on! Say you'll come!"

  Remi turned to Jane looking entirely uncertain and then answered, "I don't know Ally, uh... today is...maybe—"

  "Remi!" Jane said as though she were caught off guard by his lack of decorum, "it's rude to decline an invitation." She turned to Allison and answered for the both of them, "Remi and I would be delighted to join you and Mark for dinner tonight, Allison."

  Jane's open smile and unshakable confidence made pure, unbridled hatred boil up in Allison, but she fought it down, "great! Perfect! I'll see you both later then," she said, touching both of them on the arm. "I'll text you the details, Remi," she added while she got in to the waiting taxicab.

  "Great," Remi dragged out the word as they watched the car cruise off in to the distance.

  "Yes, it is! I haven't been out at night yet, Remi. We have to decide on what I'm going to wear. There's no time to waste!" Jane said, taking Remi by the hand and leading him to the door.