Imaginary Lines

Page 27

  His thumb stroked the sensitive back of my neck and I opened my mouth with a tiny gasp. He groaned and pulled me closer, drawing my lower lip lightly between his teeth. His hands tangled in my hair as my mouth opened under his. All thought was driven from my mind, just the desire to be closer to him. My hands ran over the smooth, hard muscles of his arms, slipping up beneath his sleeve to saver the curve of his bicep. One of his hands wandered down my neckline, playing with soft skin and trailing fire over the gentle swell of my breast, and I forgot how to breathe.

  I let out a mew deep in my throat and he responded by hardening the kiss, pressing me roughly against the brick wall. Everything was pressure and sensation. The rest of the world melted away as we fell against each other. Heat pooled low in my stomach and all my weight drained away, leaving my bones turned to water and my spirit floating high. His lips were hot with desire, his breath labored, and it drew heady warmth to every part of my body. When he pulled back a breath, I couldn’t move.

  He leaned his forehead forward against mine, breathing deeply. His hands cradled my neck. “Oh, God, Tamar. ”

  I had melted. I was a puddle of want, and incapable of forming actual words. Instead, I just leaned my forehead against his and made a soft noise of agreement.

  “Come—” He visibly strained himself, pausing until he had caught his breath. “I have to go to Miami. ”

  Words. Maybe I could manage one or two words. “I know. ”

  “I wish you were coming with me. ”

  “Me too. ”

  He closed his eyes like the very claws of temptation were raking down his spine. Then he set me back a foot. “You should go home. ”

  I should? I should. “Okay. ”

  My brain didn’t start functioning until after I’d reemerged from the subway in Astoria. I lifted my head. The moon, a fine yellow sickle, glowed bright in the blackish sky. My legs were cold in their tights but my chest stayed warm beneath my sweater and coat. The chill didn’t bother me; it felt bracingly fresh, invigorating and empowering. I’d never felt so alive as I felt in this movement, with the wind sliding over but not touching me, protected by the spell of the moonlight. I felt special. I felt amazing. I felt like, for the first time in my life, I’d swum through an iridescent sea of magic and I shimmered with it still.

  Chapter Twelve

  They lost to Miami.

  In Waxy’s, we groaned and buried our heads in our arms. Old Ray shook his head unhappily as he wiped down the counter. The one Halloween ghoul looked appropriately glum.

  “What are they thinking?” Carlos howled.

  Oh, God. What was I thinking? Why had I kissed Abe? I was crazy. What had happened to getting over Abraham Krasner?

  But then I remembered the first thing on my list. Find magic.

  And the last, before Abe: Be happy.

  But they weren’t supposed to come with Abraham.

  I’ve heard some people say that in football season, every Sunday is like Christmas. I wouldn’t know about that. I like Christmas and all—a day devoted to Chinese food and movies!—but I was well aware I didn’t get the emotion most of the country got out of it.

  But I was pretty sure I was very close to that anticipation now.

  At least it was a good week to be distracted. The whole city was alive with mischief as Halloween approached. On Saturday, I’d gone out with my roommates, dressed as a haphazard Raggedy Ann to Jaz’s haphazard Raggedy Andy. We were both extremely proud of how little effort our costumes took.

  Lucy had announced she would be going as a mermaid, because of course she happened to have mermaid accessories from last year’s Coney Island parade, which of course she’d been part of. I personally though her shell-bra looked like a very cold idea, but she assured me it would be warm in the club, and she could wear her jacket until we arrived. Her aquamarine skirt fishtailed in flowing waves of silk, and she added conch-shell earrings and a tiara, because of course she was a mermaid princesses.

  Sabeen had regarded us with a degree of distrust. “I don’t get it. ”

  “Just pick something. ” Lucy had gestured at her wardrobe, which was stocked with dresses, wigs, and jewelry. “I have cat-ears for the easiest, or I’m pretty sure we could put together a pirate costume. ”

  Sabeen had appeared unconvinced, but finally settled for being a blonde. This had confused the rest of us, but Sabeen had then been confused that we were confused after telling her she could be anything, so we decided it was really a non-worthwhile rabbit hole.

  So we were the Raggedies, a mermaid and a blonde.

  On actual Halloween, almost the whole office headed to one of the bars on the block for after-work drinks. In a close-knit office where everyone was around the same age and everyone liked each other and worked long hours, it was kind of like instant-friends. Especially when many of us had moved here for this job, and didn’t already have a huge network. So we wrapped up work early on Tuesday and then went to one of the bars downstairs.

  It wasn’t an official Today Media event, but it definitely wasn’t just people from Sports who went. A bunch of the girls from the women’s mag dressed in stupid sexy costumes—like sexy slice of pizza and sexy crayon and sexy tree. The regular news reporters just wore a bunch of cheap headbands with elephant and cat ears, while the comic division wore mostly superhero T-shirts over their jeans and Chucks.

  I felt vaguely embarrassed that we were all such stereotypes. Even as I pulled on one of Abe’s old jerseys, which his mom had gifted to me one Hanukkah.

  You know, you’d think she’d be less blatant about giving me her son’s personal effects, but that never seemed to slow her down.

  My roommates came out to join us, and we all drank wine and cocktails until the room spun and no one could stop giggling. I met Jin’s fiancée, and watched Mduduzi dance super-awkwardly with a girl dressed as Mr. Potato Head, and a good time was had by all. The next morning, we all came in armed with breakfast sandwiches, plugged in our headphones, and drank coffee from eight to eight, while Tanya snorted and shook her head.

  By Saturday, my nervous energy rendered me useless at anything besides watching the clock and hoping the next twenty-four hours passed with accelerated speed. To distract myself, I began streaming Buffy at ten in the morning. She’d been exchanging witty repartee with Spike for barely twenty minutes when my phone buzzed.

  To my utter shock and delight, the screen said Abraham.

  My heart leaped high in my throat, and I had to swallow it down before I picked up. Somehow I had willed him into calling me. I was magical. “Hey. ”

  Even though I couldn’t see his face, I could hear the smile in his voice. “Hey, you. You live in Astoria, right?”

  I glanced outside, in case my apartment building had whisked me away to Oz. A pigeon lifted from the sill and left behind a pasty white blotch. “Yup. ”

  “Cool. You home? I’m on Broadway and Thirty-fifth. ”

  “I am,” I said in a slight daze, and gave him my address.

  “Be there in five. ”

  I set down my phone and stared at my mirror, which reflected shock and confusion. Then I went into freak-out mode and started running around my apartment like a headless chicken. Oh, God. Abe was coming here. Were things clean? Did I look like a human?

  I slid to a stop in front of the bathroom mirror. Oh hey, I did look like a human. Cool. Wait, I wasn’t wearing a bra. I dashed into my room and snapped on my polka-dot favorite, and then stared into my shirt drawer in a dazed panic. A shirt. I needed to pick a shirt.